Chapter 16

Ava

It finally felt like spring outside, and I couldn't be happier. Change and second chances were what this meant. I had one more week of rehab, and then I could start working toward playing in the spring season. It put a fire in me, and I've been working even harder to make it back.

"How far did you go this morning?" Ashley yawned as I burst through the front door.

"About six miles." I grinned as I stretched in the living room. My leg ached, but it was a good ache. It wasn't throbbing or swollen, and it seemed the harder I pushed myself, the better I felt.

"Coach will be happy about that." She moved about preparing herself breakfast. "How does Carter feel about it?"

"Me running?" I furrowed my brow, twisting my lip at the same time. "Fine, I guess."

"I mean about you not needing him anymore." She grinned. She knew what me being finished with PT meant.

"I haven't really asked him. We pretend nothing's changed when I'm there." I went to grab a water.

"I'll bet he's happy. You guys can be a real couple." She giggled.

"Yeah, probably. He's been kinda weird lately about that. It's been two months since our first date, and other than a few sweet kisses, he barely touches me. I keep telling myself that he's not Danny. Sometimes I have a hard time believing it though." I sighed as I leaned against the counter.

"When is the official last visit?" She stepped around me, grabbing her toast in the process.

"Tomorrow. Tomorrow is my last session, then hopefully I'll get clearance from the doctor to return to soccer." I was nervous. Tomorrow was D Day sort of. I had a doctor's appointment in the morning, and they would forward the results to Carter. I'd find out what the plan was when I went to PT that afternoon. I needed everything to work out better. I needed to be in the gym and on the field with the team.

"It'll be great," Ashley assured me before heading to her room. "I'm going to head out for a run. I need to be ready to keep up with you."

"Have fun." I laughed as I shuffled into the living room. I plopped down on the couch and finished my water. I needed to stretch a little more before I headed to the shower.

As I sat there letting my mind wander, I couldn't help but focus on the lopsided blue bowl that now adorned my coffee table. It made me smile every time I looked at it. It also made me remember the night Carter and I made it. We'd been out several times since, but nothing was as memorable. I still haven't gotten to plan a date yet, but I'm thinking that if tomorrow goes well, I'll pick something to celebrate.

The day has crept by, and when I got home from class I could hardly sit still. I tossed my backpack on the couch, and grabbed an apple off the counter. I needed to find some place to go where I could just let my mind wander freely and not have to concentrate on anything in particular. Class today was a nightmare. I couldn't concentrate, and I know the closer it gets to my appointment tomorrow, the worse it will get.

Ashley wasn't home yet, so I sent her text that I was heading to the beach and would see her later. I grabbed a jacket in case it got cold, stuffed my keys in my pocket, and rushed out the door. We were only a few blocks away, and I needed the waves and the breeze to calm me. According to my dad, it was one of the few places that would always get me to stop crying as a baby. When he'd have one of those days when he didn't think he could do it, he'd take me down to the beach and just sit. Something about the calming sounds of the waves hitting the sand always put me at ease no matter how turbulent things were in my head. I'd continued to do this, and sometimes I felt like it was the only place other than the soccer field where my mom could hear me.

As I walked along, I nibbled on my apple, not really watching where I was going. I crossed over the dunes, and found a spot where the sand was dry. I plopped down and stretched my legs in front of me. The beach was fairly empty. It wasn't tourist season yet, and still a little chilly for swimming. Every once in a while a diehard surfer might appear, but other than that it was a quiet spot.

"Tomorrow's the day," I murmured as I stared out at the water. "I hope you see how hard I'm working at this. Dad says you're always there, but I still don't understand why you let this happen. Aren't you supposed to be protecting me from the bad in life? How could getting hurt be something good for me?" I took the last bite of my apple and tossed the core into the dunes.

The sky was a beautiful shade of pink and orange. I pulled my knees to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. I didn't understand what the purpose was in me getting hurt. I asked my mom and the universe about this all the time, and I didn't think they'd answered me yet. My dad was big on all that ‘everything happens for a reason'. I'd asked him before if he really thought that. He'd said yes, but I didn't know how he could be so understanding. The universe took my mom away. He told me once that it was hard to forgive God for that. He said when he really stopped to think about it, he realized that if she were still here, I wouldn't be. She sacrificed herself for me. The doctor told her that her only chance was to end her pregnancy. She said no, and that was the only reason I was here.

When I was younger, I thought it was pretty twisted, but now that I'm older I realize that he was right. I guess I just didn't like to think about a her or me choice.

"Why did this happen though? I don't understand what the purpose was," I grumbled as I picked at the sand. I guess she was listening and probably rolling her eyes at me. Maybe from up there things seemed simple, but from where I stood, it was so complicated and muddy that I didn't always get and understand the message right away. Something told me to turn around. I didn't know what it was… instinct? Chance? A small voice in my head? I turned toward the dunes, and there, climbing over them was Carter. He had jeans on, and had cuffed them up to right below his knees. A long-sleeved athletic shirt clung tight to his arms and chest. His hair was ruffled from the wind. He smiled when he saw me watching.

"Something told me you might need company tonight!" he yelled over the crashing waves. When he reached me, he sat down and bumped his shoulder against mine. "Am I right?"

"Maybe?" I grinned back before turning back to the water. "I came down here to escape the noise in my head."

"Noise? You ok?" He seemed genuinely concerned.

"I'm fine. Just a lot going on, and then with tomorrow…" I let my voice trail off. I was getting it now. Bit by bit the pieces were coming together.

"Wanna take a walk?" He started to stand.

"I'd like that." I let him pull me to a standing position. "How'd you know I'd be here?"

"I just did. This is your place. Seems like every time something important is going on, you come here. I figured I'd give it a try first." He reached for my hand, linking our fingers together. "I know you better than you think. I know that you're doubting that tomorrow will bring good news. You're all in your head about that, us, and all the other things that you worry too much about. I know that it'll all be fine, and by tomorrow afternoon, I can scream to the masses that you're my girl. I can come to your games and wave signs around that I'm your number one fan, and it won't just be words, it'll be the truth. I know that you and I have been taking things slow, but there's a reason I'm doing that. I don't want to have to think about who might be watching when we're together. I don't want to think about anything but you, and how crazy I am about you."

"Thanks." I looked up and stared at him. His eyes were twinkling, and his lips were pulled up on one side as he watched me. I knew he meant it, and I also finally understood why it all happened. Carter was meant for me. My mom knew this, and she did the only thing she could to force us to meet. Everything happened for a reason, and I wouldn't be where I am right now if I didn't go through the past. Danny was never the plan, it was Carter; I knew that now.