2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Jessica

"My brain is completely empty of ideas." I lean forward until my head bangs against the desk between me and Evelyn, my best friend. "It's never gotten this bad before. I've never gotten to the point where I can't come up with a simple idea or sentence. It's like every word, every thought has completely left my head. It's an empty cavern of blankness. I legitimately don't have the ability to come up with anything."

The coarse timber of the cool wooden desk pricks my forehead, but I don't move. It's better to feel the sharp sting than the frustration that's been a constant companion for months. Somehow, my usually dull life has become even more boring, especially since it's my stories that add a spark to my existence.

Evelyn is usually chatty, so when I don't hear her respond, I lift my head slightly. Evelyn, like all of the O'Connell siblings, is a beauty with her long brown hair and blue eyes; all of them look like they just stepped out of a fashion magazine. It's a bit annoying being friends with people who always look good. She's sitting at the other end of the desk, her legs crossed at the ankles and her arms folded as she stares at me. I groan at the teasing glint I see in her eyes as she looks at me.

"Don't say what you're thinking." I shake my head. "Please. I don't want to hear it. Stay quiet."

Evelyn bursts into laughter before saying the dreaded words anyway. "Maybe you should put thriller aside and start writing romance. Try it, you'll be—"

"Ewww!!" I cry, clutching my neck like I am suffocating. I hate the sound of that word. Romance. It's such a fickle term that means nothing in the world today, especially amongst the youth. Evelyn says I belong to the older generation, and I agree with her wholeheartedly. I will never understand love as it stands today.

"Okay. Let's be serious." Evelyn swings her legs off the desk, displacing the nameplate with her name and the title "CEO". We're in her office at the Bake My Day bakery, a store Evelyn started ten years ago as a teenager. I'm so proud of her.

"I'm truly worried about you," Evelyn says. "You've been complaining about this for the longest time. What can we do? How can I help?"

I shrug. This is one of the most prolonged bouts of writer's block I've ever experienced, and I don't know how to get rid of it. "I don't know, Evie. I've tried everything. I even listened to those sappy songs you recommended. That was awful by the way and it did nada. It wasn't helpful at all."

Evelyn narrows her eyes at me. "Seriously? Those songs are some of the best I've ever heard."

I scrunch my face. "You have questionable taste in music, Evie. I thought we agreed on that."

She lets out a hearty laugh and throws her head back, giving in to the amusement she has at my current situation. Her carefree and unbridled personality is something else she shares with Sean and Liam. They all seem to be able to laugh easily, regardless of where they are, and without a care if anyone is staring at them. I'm the exact opposite and I hardly find anything funny. It's a wonder that Evelyn and I are such besties.

"Okay," Evelyn calls my attention again. "Guess what?"

"What?" I stare blankly at her, holding back my smile when I see her lips curl up cheekily.

"How about I plan a girls' night this weekend? We'll order in, watch movies, do a mani/pedi, and talk all night. Maybe that'll help?"

"It won't," I say decisively. "But I love hanging out with you, so I'm down whenever. I'll bring the wine–" Then I clear my throat and narrow my eyes at her. "I, however, draw the line at watching silly rom-coms with you."

When she starts complaining, I shake my head firmly and stand my ground. "Evelyn O'Connell, I love you to death, but I will not sit through a rom-com with you; that's the end of it."

Evelyn pouts and glares at me. "Have you stopped to think that your love life might be going so bad because you hate romance so much?"

A rare trickle of laughter pops out of me, and I pick up a piece of paper, roll it into a ball and throw it at her. She puts her hands up to block and laughs at me.

"What? I'm just trying to help! You've got to let me help you."

As funny as it is, this isn't a joke. My inability to find a boyfriend who fits me is another area of my life that frustrates me. My writer's block is bad, but my love life is worse. I've been in a series of relationships and flings, the latest being Marlon, the blind date my agent set me up with.

"Oh speaking of, did I tell you how my date with Marlon went?"

Evelyn leans on her desk and rests her face on her hands. "We were talking about writer's block and I didn't want to ask. Now that you've brought it up, tell me, tell me."

"He was horrible," I say, causing Evelyn to dissolve into another fit of laughter. "I think I only said one word throughout our entire date. Well, maybe five with me ordering. He wouldn't let me get one word in."

"What?"

"Girl—as soon as I said ‘hello' and sat down, he started bombarding me with details about his successful life as a lawyer while flashing his expensive watch at me. I think at this point I know more about being a lawyer than I thought possible. It was awful."

Evelyn frowns. "Did you tell him about this after the date?"

"I haven't got time for that, Evie. I blocked him in the parking lot on my way home."

"That's my girl," Evelyn whoops. "We don't waste a second more than necessary on men with zero potential."

"Especially after Dillon?" I sneer and shake my head remembering what happened with him. "I'd be an utter fool to do that."

Dillion was my last actual boyfriend, and we dated for three months before I found out he didn't want to have kids. He hated kids, period. I mean, I don't have kids yet, and right now, I agree that they're noisy little devils, but I do love them and want them sometime in the future. I wasn't completely in love with Dillion, but I was well on my way there. Maybe I was more in love with the idea of being in love actually. Either way, thank goodness I found that out early on before I was in love with him. I've never ended a relationship so fast in my life.

"Okay," Evelyn says, bringing the topic back to our girls' night. "We can come to a compromise. We'll watch one thriller and one romance movie. How's that?"

I bite my lip as I consider it and Evie laughs at me. I'm not selfish, but I really don't like romance movies. I gravitate more toward movies that tend to be suspenseful, heavily plotted, and get my blood-pumping. Romance movies are…unrealistic if you ask me. But Evelyn is watching me with hopeful eyes, and I've never been able to refuse her anything. "Okay, fine. I hate you."

"I love you." She blows me a kiss. "You can pick out the thriller; I'll pick out the romance."

"I think I should pick the romance movie." She starts to argue, but I raise a finger. "You always manage to pick the sappiest, sloppiest, impractical flick of the bunch. I can't sit through another night of you crying into your tissue because the hero falls madly in love with the heroine. No. Nope. Can't do it."

Evelyn is laughing, but I don't see how any of this is funny. "I was thinking we should watch Web of Love. It's been out for a while, but I haven't watched it."

Web of Love. My heart skips a beat.

"You haven't heard of it?" Evelyn asks, taking my silence for ignorance. "It's the new movie my brother just starred in. It's—"

"I've heard of it," I blurt, losing control of my mouth and mind. "I've seen it too."

Evelyn's mouth falls open, and I realize a little too late that I shouldn't have said anything. Of course Evelyn would find some hidden meaning in me watching one of Sean's movies.

"What?" She gasps. "You've watched Sean's new movie? It's romance. The sappiest romance movie I know of. You just told me how much you hate romance, how you never watch it. You only watch thrillers."

"I know, I know. Relax…" I groan, ready to lie my way out of the situation. The truth is that I've watched every movie Sean has ever starred in, but I won't be telling her that. Nope. That little secret is staying with me and only me. I will take it to my grave.

"Relax?" She sputters. "How can I? Watching Sean's movie is a love language. You never watch romance movies with me, and I'm your best friend!"

"You're grasping at straws here, Evie. I'm starting to wonder if the wrong sibling went into acting with the drama you put out. Now you're saying I'm in love with Sean? Your brother? You do realize I haven't seen that nuisance in five years? Not only have I not seen him, I haven't spoken to him. But somehow I'm secretly in love with him because I watch his movies? Are you listening to yourself?"

Technically, it is true. I am in love with Sean—only I don't mention that to Evie. I don't mention that I follow every ounce of gossip news about him and am pretty up to date with his life happenings. All the way down to the newest movies he'll be starring in, to his latest love interest. Which recently has been no one.

"I guess you're right," Evelyn answers thoughtfully.

"In fact, to be honest," I add, which is ironic since I'm about to lie. "The only reason I watched it was because I stumbled upon it while searching for a thriller sometime last week. I was just about to turn it off when I saw Sean. I thought, he's my friend. I should support him and watch this. It's the nice thing to do. I'm nothing, if not nice."

"Sure." Evelyn nods, but there is a twinkle in her eye that says she doesn't believe one word out of my mouth as I continue.

"I'm not going to lie, it was disappointing."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Sean's rom-coms are usually overly sappy, but this one was completely over the top. It was the furthest thing from real life I think I've ever seen. The main character was too in love. I swear, love like that doesn't exist. Sean played it too…"

"Too much?" Evelyn suggests.

"No. I wouldn't say that because he's a great actor." I shrug. "This is on the movie itself. To me, it wasn't realistic and I definitely won't be watching it again."

"Liar, liar, pants on fire."

I freeze. Only Evelyn and I are in the office, but that isn't Evelyn's voice. This voice has a deeper timbre. It's the voice I've only heard from the TV and my phone for the past five years. Instead of looking behind me, I look at Evelyn's face. Her eyes are as round as saucers as her gaze lands on the person behind me; her mouth is opening and closing, but no words come out.

"Evie!" I hear the voice again, just as someone walks past me to move across the desk toward Evelyn. It's Sean. Sean O'Connell. Are you freaking kidding me right now?

"Sean!" Evelyn flies off the chair and flings herself into her brother's arms.

I feel a hand on my shoulder and turn to see my brother, Jamie. Just like Evelyn and I are best friends, Jamie and Sean are as well. Evelyn is crying on Sean's shoulders while Sean hugs her tight and pats her hair.

"You knew he was coming?" I whisper to Jamie. "How long?"

"Yesterday." Jamie smiles sheepishly. "He asked me not to tell anyone."

"You kept the secret from me?!" I growl at my older brother. "You—"

"Jessica Stewart's famous temper." I hear Sean tease and turn to see him approaching me, his arms outstretched. Ew, I hate hugs, especially from Sean, who hadn't been around in five years and happens to walk in on me criticizing his latest movie. Oh, this is so embarrassing. I try to escape, but Sean pulls me close to his body and envelopes me in the mushiest, most annoying—oh, this is actually nice—hug.

Sean's arms feel strong around me, and to my alarm, my whole body betrays me. My heart beats faster and I feel myself relax into his embrace. He smells nice and manly, a combination of pine and a crisp fall day. I bite my lips to stop from inhaling his scent like some love starved fan. But why does he have to smell so good?! Thankfully, he releases me after just a few short seconds before he holds me at arm's length. Looking into his eyes my knees go a bit weak. His eyes have always been the deepest shade of blue, and even now, after five years, they are lovelier than any other set of blue eyes I've ever seen. His hair, which he used to grow out, has now been cropped short, framing his face in just a way that makes his features even more handsome. He's smiling, both his dimples are teasing me, making me want to lean in and…

"Did I just hear you say that you hate my new movie?" He asks, breaking through my haze of unwanted emotions and bringing me back to reality with a crash. I shrug out of his hold and take a step away from him.

Distance, I need distance.

"I don't hate it," I counter, proud of myself for not stuttering. "I just—uhm—"

"Web of Love is one of the highest-grossing movies ever," he says, a glint in his eyes and a smirk on his lips. "It's also the most widely discussed rom-com of all time. I'm not sure I understand what you would find to hate about it."

Evie appears beside her brother and hooks her arm around his waist. "Leave her alone," she says. "It's not you, Jessica just doesn't like romance."

"Is that so?" Sean says without taking his eyes off me, the teasing glint splintering my thoughts. My poor heart is working overtime.

"It's hard not to make it about me when she thinks I was doing too much in the movie."

I gasp and glare at him, conscious of how his eyes narrow in reaction to my blazing stare. This man has always been trouble for me. "When did you hear that? Were you eavesdropping?"

Sean lowers his eyes demurely and lifts one shoulder. "It's not called eavesdropping when everyone in Bake My Day can hear you from the store. If it was a secret, then talking quietly would've been your best bet for not being overheard."

"How much did you hear?" Evelyn asks Sean.

"Enough to know that Jessica doesn't like her men discussing work on dates."

Evelyn and I gasp. He heard me talk about Marlon!

"Sean, you haven't changed," Evelyn jokingly scolds her brother before turning to mine. "And you too, Jamie. That wasn't nice."

The boys burst into laughter, and I bite my tongue to keep from lashing out. It's what they want me to do. I practically grew up with the O'Connell's, and Sean knows me almost as well as my family. I keep my mouth shut, careful not to give him the reaction he's hoping for. But it's hard not to feel embarrassed. Sean is the last person I want to know about Marlon!

"So, how's business, Evie?" Sean turns away from me to look at his sister, and it feels like I've been robbed of the sun hidden by a cloud as the warmth of his gaze leaves me. You're crazy, Jess. So crazy. Get a life!