37. Violet

Chapter 37

Violet

I freeze when I see a woman I vaguely recognize sitting in the living room with Kelsey. Sawyer frowns and strides into the room, so I close the door quietly and hover by it.

“What are you doing here, Miriam?” he demands, his voice hard.

My heart stutters as soon as he says her name. Oh god. It’s his ex-wife .

I can still feel the wetness and soreness between my legs from all the orgasms Sawyer gave me tonight, but seeing his ex sitting on his couch has thrown cold water over all of that. The arousal that was flooding my veins just seconds ago drains away, and I wrap my arms around myself as Miriam arches a brow at Sawyer.

“You stopped answering my calls,” she tells him, sounding very put out. “You were ignoring me, and I needed to talk to you.”

“So you came to my house?”

Miriam huffs a breath. “It used to be my house too.”

I can’t see Sawyer’s expression from where I’m standing, but I can see the way his shoulders tense as he shakes his head.

“Well, it’s not anymore,” he says, and I can tell he’s working to keep his tone even. “This is incredibly inappropriate, Miriam.”

Kelsey blanches a little, glancing between the two of them with a look of panic blossoming across her face.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Townsend,” she says quickly. “She told me she’s Jake’s mom, and that it was an emergency. She said she needed to talk to you and that she didn’t mind waiting, and I wasn’t sure what to do. I shouldn’t have?—”

“It’s not your fault,” Sawyer tells her. “You didn’t know.”

To his credit, he manages to gentle his voice a bit as he speaks to her, even though I can tell he’s angry at this situation. Stepping forward, he reaches into his back pocket for his wallet, then pulls out several bills and holds them out to Kelsey. She rises from the couch to take them, still looking chagrined.

“How was Jake tonight?” he asks quietly.

She swallows, looking just about as uncomfortable as I feel right now. “He was great. He’s a sweet kid, and we had fun. We played some games, then he went to bed around eight.”

“Thank you.”

“I really am sorry about?—”

Sawyer holds a hand up, stopping her. “It’s okay. Have a good night, Kelsey.”

He turns toward the door, and I step to one side so that he can usher her out. As soon as she’s gone, he turns back to face his ex, who rises from the couch with an almost challenging expression on her face, as if she’s spoiling for a fight.

“Jesus, you’re so dramatic,” she says, her lip curling slightly. “You don’t have to act like I’m some sort of threat.”

“Not a threat.” Sawyer’s voice is cool and distant. “Just unwelcome. If you truly needed to speak to me, there are ways to contact me. Showing up at my house late at night is not one of them.”

“Well, clearly you weren’t interested in answering the phone when I called, so what was I supposed to do?”

He makes a sound under his breath. “Were you calling to speak to Jake? To find out how your son is doing? To tell him you love him? Or were you calling because you want more money so that you can invest in another shady business or jet off with some random man?”

My stomach twists at his words. There’s a bone-deep exhaustion in his voice that makes it clear he already knows the answer to his question. She’s not interested in Jake. She seems to only be interested in herself.

Miriam scowls as if she doesn’t like being called out, opening her mouth to respond. Before she can say anything, I press away from the wall by the door, moving toward the stairs. I feel like a voyeur, watching this private drama play out, and I’m not sure this is a conversation I should be here for.

“I’ll just… give you two a moment to talk,” I murmur.

Sawyer’s gaze flicks to me, his expression full of so many things that I can’t even begin to name them.

“Come back down soon,” he says softly. “This won’t take long.”

He holds my gaze for long enough that my heart starts to beat harder, and I nod once, then turn and hurry up the stairs. I can make out the muffled sound of their voices as I pad quietly toward Jake’s room.

His door is cracked, so I poke my head inside and find that he’s thankfully out cold. He’s sleeping on his back, his hands sprawled out on either side of his head, and I breathe a sigh of relief. After what Sawyer has told me about the way Miriam disappeared from her son’s life, I’m glad he’s blissfully unaware that she’s currently downstairs attempting to shake down his father for money.

A feeling of protectiveness wells in my chest, and my eyes burn as I blink back tears.

I slip into the room and pull his covers up to his chin, pressing a soft kiss to Jake’s messy hair.

I won’t let anyone hurt you , I promise him silently, swallowing past the lump in my throat. Then I straighten and leave, careful not to wake him as I shut the door fully on my way out.

Sawyer and Miriam are still talking downstairs, and I stand in the hallway for several long moments, wracked by indecision. Sawyer told me to come back down soon, but I’m not sure I should.

As attached as I am to Jake, he’s not mine. And Sawyer isn’t mine either, despite the fact that I sometimes allow myself to forget that. I don’t truly have any right or reason to be a part of whatever discussion is happening downstairs between Sawyer and his ex.

But on the other hand, maybe he’s waiting for me. Maybe I could give him a bit of support, some solidarity as he deals with Miriam.

I step closer to the stairs, chewing on my lip until it stings. I’ve just reached the top step when Miriam raises her voice a little, and the sound reaches my ears more clearly than her previous words have.

“Are you kidding me?” she asks, derision in her tone. “You really are fucking the nanny, aren’t you?” She snorts. “Wow. What a fantastic example you’re setting for Jake.”

My heart jumps into my throat, my eyes going wide. Shit . I don’t know if she picked up something between us when we walked in, but I wouldn’t be all that surprised if she had. We weren’t expecting to see her, and although Sawyer wasn’t touching me or anything when we walked inside, he had just had his fucking hand up my dress. She must’ve noticed something in the way we looked or acted as we stepped into the house.

“Jake doesn’t know,” Sawyer responds, not bothering to deny her accusation. “And you of all people have no room to talk about setting an example for him. Yes, Violet and I have been hooking up, but it hasn’t impacted Jake at all. And it won’t. She and I are just having some fun together. It’s not going to last, and we both know that. Either way, it’s none of your fucking business.”

Something in my stomach twists at his words. They’re exactly what we agreed to—what we both want—but hearing him say it all out loud like that makes the temporary nature of our relationship feel more real than it ever has.

Miriam makes a dismissive sound. “I guess that’s the benefit of being a single father, isn’t it? You meet all these sweet, impressionable young women who come to babysit Jake, and I bet they fall all over themselves to spend time with ‘Daddy.’ Seriously, how old is she? Twenty? Twenty-one?”

“She’s twenty-five,” he bites out, and Miriam snorts again.

“Well, no matter how old she is, you’re taking advantage of her. It’s disgusting.”

Her voice drops on the last word, and she draws it out a little as if she’s twisting a knife in his chest. Something flares inside me in response. It’s a different kind of protectiveness than I felt when I looked at Jake, but I can’t stand hearing her speak to Sawyer like that. Can’t stand her trying to make him feel guilty for something that’s been so special and amazing. Something that I asked him for—no, begged him for—and that I’ll never forget as long as I live.

Before I can think twice about it, I’m moving, my feet carrying me quickly down the stairs. They’re both still standing in the living room, and they look up as I enter.

Without breaking stride, I walk over to Sawyer confidently and wrap an arm around his waist, standing beside him.

“You’re wrong about that,” I tell Miriam. “He’s not taking advantage of me at all. Maybe I’m not as old as you, but I’m a grown woman, and I can decide what or who I want. And he’s who I want. Do you have any idea how much he’s taught me?”

Miriam blinks at me as if surprised by my sudden appearance. “What do you mean? Taught you what?”

Her gaze flicks from me to Sawyer, who wraps his own arm around my waist, his hand settling possessively at my hip. I lean into him a little, bolstered by the heat and strength of his solid body.

“Oh, so many things.” I smile brightly at her. “For one thing, he’s taught me how many times I can come—in a row. Can you believe I used to think it was just once? Now I’m pretty sure my record is seven.”

“Eight,” Sawyer corrects, his voice rumbling in his chest.

My smile widens, and I blink innocently at Miriam. “Oops, my mistake. Eight. I’ve also learned that I like sexting, love giving blowjobs, and am a huge fan of piercings. Plus, I’ve learned how long a professional athlete like Sawyer can hold his breath while I ride his face.” I chuckle, lifting one shoulder in a shrug. “Turns out it’s pretty damn long. But most of all, he’s taught me how good it feels to give a man something no other woman ever has.”

Miriam’s face turns a deeper shade of red with every word I speak, and her expression twists when I’m finished. I must have gotten to her, because she seems speechless.

Good. That seems like a first .

“So, no,” I say, keeping the pleasant smile locked on my face. “I wouldn’t say that Sawyer has taken advantage of me at all. In fact, I’d say that he’s one of the most amazing people I know. He’s kind, he’s caring, he’s generous, and I consider myself lucky to have gotten to spend time living with him. If you couldn’t appreciate any of that while you had him, that’s your loss. It’s certainly not his.”

The smile slips away as some of the anger boiling in my veins on Sawyer’s behalf bleeds through, and Miriam yanks her head back as if she’s been slapped. She stares at me with unblinking eyes for a long moment, her nostrils flared wide and her lips pressed into a thin line. Then her focus snaps back to Sawyer.

“Are you going to let her talk to me like that?” she demands, her voice taking on a shrill edge.

Sawyer chuckles, squeezing my hip. “I think you’re under the mistaken impression that I let her do anything. Like she said, she’s an adult. She makes her own decisions.”

Miriam’s face contorts with anger, and I tense up a bit, my heart fluttering. She looks furious, and I have a fleeting moment to wonder if I made things worse by marching down here and throwing my relationship with Sawyer in her face like this—not just because we’re supposed to be keeping it quiet, but because she clearly doesn’t like me.

She opens her mouth as if she’s going to say something, but then she snaps it shut again. With her expression set in a rigid mask, she storms around us, heading toward the door. She yanks it open, then glares over her shoulder at Sawyer.

“Forget I even asked for your help,” she spits. “I don’t need it. I hope you and your nanny are very happy together.” She sneers at me. “You two fucking deserve each other.”

With that, she steps outside and slams the door behind her. I wince at the sound, glancing toward the stairs as I listen for any indication that Jake has woken up. At least I shut his door all the way, since that probably helped to muffle the sound.

When several heartbeats pass without any noises filtering down from upstairs, my focus shifts to Sawyer. He still has his arm wrapped around me, and he’s gazing down at me with an intense, unreadable expression.

“I’m sorry,” I whisper, grimacing. “I shouldn’t have said all of that. I mean, I know she had already figured out that we’ve been sleeping together, but I didn’t have to give her more details. It just made me so mad, hearing her talk to you like that. Hearing her imply that you’re anything less than a kind, decent man, when you’re one of the most honorable people I’ve ever met. I couldn’t stand to?—”

My words break off as Sawyer’s lips crash down on mine. He hauls me against him, both of his arms banding around me in a way that pins my body against his until I’m molded to him, my tongue sliding against his and my arms wrapped around his neck.

He kisses me the same way he did in the car on the ride home, hungry and desperate—except now, it’s tinged with something else too. Something I can’t quite put a name to, but that lights a fire inside me, sending heat licking through my veins.

When we finally part, he rests his forehead against mine, our faces still so close that our noses are almost touching.

“Don’t be sorry,” he whispers, his breath warm on my skin. “Don’t ever be sorry, heartbreaker.”

I swallow, nodding lightly. He presses another kiss to my mouth, firm but more chaste this time, then draws back, brushing his thumb over my bottom lip.

“I hate that you had to see any of that,” he murmurs. “She shouldn’t have been here. I entertained her bullshit for too long after we split, always hoping that it would somehow lead to her becoming a better, more invested parent for Jake. But it never did, and I can see now that I was just clinging to false hope. This is who she is, maybe who she’s always been, and it’s not going to change. So I have to. I have to stop making any space in my life for her and her toxicity.”

I nod again, reaching up to rest my hand over his. “You deserve better than that, Sawyer. Even if you don’t ever want love or marriage again, you deserve to have people in your life who love you for the incredible man you are, not for what they think you can give them.”

He drags in a slow breath, letting his eyes fall closed for a moment. Then he lets it out, his dark gray eyes glinting in the lamp light as he reopens them.

“Thank you, heartbreaker,” he murmurs, stroking my cheek. A small, wan smile pulls at the corners of his lips. “I know that kind of ruined the mood, but… will you come up to bed with me anyway?”

He’s not wrong about the mood. The heat that sparked between us earlier has cooled, the flame of desire doused by the bucket of ice water that is his ex-wife. But I nod anyway, because I definitely don’t want to go back to my room alone right now.

He gives me one more soft kiss, then the two of us head upstairs together.

We get ready for bed, and after I slip out of the dress and tug on a worn, comfy sleep shirt, Sawyer pulls back the blankets in invitation. I crawl up onto the bed beside him, draping one arm and one leg over his tall, muscled body. He wraps one arm around me, holding me against him, then presses his lips to my hair.

“Goodnight, heartbreaker,” he murmurs.

“Goodnight, Sawyer.”

He turns off the light, but instead of letting sleep pull me away, I just lie in his arms with my eyes closed, savoring it. Drinking in every little detail, from the feel of his chest rising and falling beneath my cheek to the dull thud of his heart against my ear. The way he smells, a blend of spice, bourbon, and oak. The warmth of his body as it seeps into mine, and the way his fingers trail slowly up and down my arm.

Because these are the things I’ll miss the most when I’m gone.