Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen

F or the rest of the day, I’m in a trance. Like a veil separating me from the real world because everything that happened today couldn’t possibly be real. We kissed…

And it felt so incredibly good. So enticing and… I can’t even really describe what it felt like to feel his soft lips on mine.

“I wish you all the best, Mrs. Shepherd,” Ezra’s words flash through my mind again, and a sharp pain instantly jolts me.

I know I did the right thing, but why does the right thing feel so unspeakably bad? Why does it eat me alive when it was the right thing to do? God damn it! I don’t want to feel like this! I DON’T want to feel like this!

Right after Ezra left the locker room, I drove Kelly home. I didn’t tell her anything, at least not what was going on with me; I just told her that things were a bit rough at home again, which isn’t a lie.

A couple of months ago, she offered me a place to stay if Thomas got violent again. I declined with thanks because I was sure it was a hiccup.

Thomas will never touch me again like he did months ago. Never again will he beat me up, and never again will I hide my countless bruises under oversized sunglasses, makeup, and a ridiculously large hat.

When I got home, I hid away after showering. I don’t want to see anyone.

I sent Thomas a quick message saying that I wasn’t feeling very well and that he could go out for a meal with his friends so that I could relax and not have to cook for him. When I reread it, I noticed the biting undertone, but the message had already been sent.

Annoyed and frustrated, I throw the phone onto the windowsill, but of course, it falls to the floor, and I have to get up from the bed and pick it up. Once there, I look out the window for a moment. But Ezra’s house is once again wholly dark. He’s not at home, and I immediately feel even worse.

I saw the look in his eyes when he said goodbye, and I could tell I hurt him. I’m not sure what to make of it. Neither of us should be feeling these emotions, especially since we hardly know each other. Still, I don’t feel right about having offended him like that.

I shake my head quickly and try to ban him from my thoughts. I made up my mind, and Ezra expressed the consequence that we both needed. Still, I can’t ignore the hurt, which feels like a stabbing pain in my chest.

I decide to go to bed to put this day behind me. To forget everything that has happened recently, at least everything that has to do with Ezra. From now on, I will concentrate entirely on my family.

I will keep quiet over the next few days and hide in bed. This works well since Thomas has given me a few days off, and I can confidently ignore Kelly’s calls. I’ve also canceled June’s visit for this weekend. She sounded relieved on the phone, but probably only because she could now avoid talking to her father for another week.

I don’t want to see anyone, especially not Ezra. But after nearly a week, I admit that my plan isn’t working. Nothing changes as I pull the covers over my head and wish myself into another world. I need to take control of my own happiness, and that’s exactly what I intend to do today.

So I throw the blanket aside, reach for my cell phone, and google something. When I find what I’m looking for, I text my husband, asking him to take me to dinner on Saturday. The restaurant we used to love when we were a young couple is still open, and I think it would be a good idea for us to start anew.

I already know Thomas will turn up his nose when he reads the message because this cute little Italian restaurant no longer meets his high expectations. But back when we first met, neither of us had much money. This cozy restaurant around the corner was all we needed to spend a lovely evening. I want the feeling of that time back, the fun we enjoyed so much.

I fervently hope that Thomas will take the hint and agree. After a few minutes of nervously staring at my screen, he replies.

It would be my pleasure!

I read the message with a grin, then step out of my hiding place. I’ve spent enough depressing hours under the covers. Now, it’s time to get back to life.

I make up the bed with a small smile before showering to start the day. I look forward to seeing my husband tonight, but even more so to our dinner on Saturday evening. Because I know everything will change from now on. I will be happy again, as will Thomas. We will sort out our problems, and then everything will be fine.

“Are you ready, Cora?” Thomas asks from the bedroom while I get ready in the adjoining bathroom.

It’s Saturday night, and we’re about to go on our date, which I’ve been looking forward to for the last few days.

“Yes. But I’ll only come out if you promise me we’ll actually go this time,” I joke and join him in the bedroom.

Thomas shakes his head with a grin.

“Then you definitely should have worn something else, darling.”

I return his smile and take another look at myself in the mirror as I put on my stud earrings—white gold, matching my watch and wedding ring. I’m also wearing a black off-the-shoulder cocktail dress and matching high heels in the same color. For once, I’m wearing my brown curls down. My outfit is, therefore, not too chic for the small restaurant and yet chic enough to catch my husband’s eye.

I step up to Thomas to kiss him before taking him by the hand and dragging him out of our bedroom because we’re definitely going out for dinner today. Everything else has to wait until later.

On the way there, Thomas tells me about his day and something about his clients. Never too much, of course, although I am curious about one or two of them.

“Does the restaurant still exist?” he asks me as he turns into the parking garage to safely park his sacred Mercedes. After all, we’re not exactly in the best part of town, but he’s being a bit dramatic.

“According to Google, yes.”

A grumble follows, signaling that he’s already losing his good mood instead of enjoying our time together. Well, I guess I’ll have to be in a good enough mood for both of us, because I refuse to let anything or anyone ruin this evening.

But a few minutes later, when we stand in front of the closed restaurant door, things suddenly take a different turn. Jesus Christ !

“Wonderful. The shabby place is closed because of a burst pipe,” Thomas grumbles to himself and gives me an ‘I-told-you-so’ look.

I take a deep breath, realizing there’s no point in both of us being in a bad mood and snapping at each other.

“Then let’s look for another Italian restaurant. I’m sure there’ll be another one around here,” I encourage him and take his hand, smiling carefully, to pull him along with me.

He follows me reluctantly before he accepts his fate, and we stroll down the street to look for a suitable alternative. It’s a shame because this restaurant has a special meaning, at least for me. I don’t know how many times Thomas took me here to eat. Back then, it also had the best pizza in town, or maybe we talked ourselves into it, but I still have many fond memories of this place.

“What about this one?”

I point to a pizzeria. We stop in front of the window and look inside. It looks nice and is well-frequented.

Thomas nods, and I pull him inside, beaming with joy. Once inside, we encounter the typical Italian ambiance: soft music and the delicious smell of food wafting into our nostrils. A friendly server shows us to an empty table in an alcove further back. Thomas’s expression softens as we walk through the restaurant, and he begins to enjoy the pleasant atmosphere.

Suddenly, just before we reach our seats, Thomas stops and turns his head.

“Ha, look. Isn’t that our dear neighbor on a date?”

“What?” My voice comes out sharp, and I follow Thomas’s gaze to where he’s pointing.

Sure enough, I see him—a couple of tables away from us. Ezra is kissing a young, very young woman. They’re sitting in one of the alcoves slightly opposite ours so you can see their table perfectly. Ezra has scooted close to her, resting his arm on the backrest, and, much to my regret, is still kissing her senseless. My lips immediately tingle at the sight, and I don’t know whether I’m burning with longing or jealousy. God! No! I’m here with my husband to have a lovely evening. You won’t interfere with my plans!

“He seems to be having a nice evening,” I reply with a relaxed smile.

Just as I’m about to look away, Ezra breaks away from his companion and looks in our direction. He’s about to turn away, but then his head snaps back with a surprised expression, his eyes widening slightly when he sees me. He quickly recovers, nodding toward us with his usual smile fixed in place. I could scream!

After I follow Thomas’s example and greet Ezra reluctantly, we take a seat at our table. I don’t want to think about him anymore and want to block out everything to do with Ezra King. But my husband probably sees things differently. As soon as we sit down and pick up the menu, he looks over his shoulder at him again.

“I can’t stand this guy,” he murmurs, looking back at me.

I avoid looking at Ezra’s table and look at my husband with a charming smile. I carefully reach across the table and place my hand on his pleadingly.

“Thomas, I don’t want to discuss our neighbor and his date now. We’re here because we wanted to spend a nice evening together,” I remind him with a subtle smile of our plans for today.

“I’m just saying. I can’t stand him. But yes, you’re right.”

Satisfied, I nod and give him an encouraging smile before turning to the menu. The dishes sound delicious, and I’m hopeful that even my fussy husband will find something he likes.

Although the evening was wonderful, and our conversation stimulating, I couldn’t take my eyes off Ezra and his date. The wine, the salad, and the main course were delicious, but my attention kept drifting back to them. The way they share their food… it’s almost disgusting, yet I can’t ignore the stabbing pain in my chest. Seeing him here with someone else hurts because it shows me I made the right decision. It shows me that Ezra is just like everyone else, and he’s never really been about me, only about seducing me. Heavens! What was I thinking?

So, I shake off the hurt and the disappointment and turn my full attention back to my husband.

“If the lady will excuse me for a moment.”

Thomas stands up and heads for the restroom. We are still waiting for our dessert, and we’ve had a wonderful evening so far. We’ve talked and laughed a lot about old times. It’s been refreshing to reconnect and get to know each other again. The daily grind has kept us in a rut for far too long.

I take another sip of my wine with a smile as Ezra’s gaze meets mine. I didn’t want to look over again; honestly, I had hoped they would have left by now. But to my dismay, they seem to be having a lot of fun, especially her. Because his hand, which was on her shoulder earlier, is now under the table, and if I can see his arm movements correctly, I have a pretty good idea of his fingers under the table.

My eyes are burning with rage. No matter what I do, I can’t turn it off. I know I’m killing him with my gaze right now. That pompous ass! I’m so angry, but most of all, disappointed, even if I don’t want to admit it to myself. Because I thought it would be different, that he would be different.

When I see how her mouth forms into a pleasurable O, and his devilish smile and stoic look challenge me, my patience snaps. I meet Thomas halfway because I want to get out of here.

“I’d like to leave, please,” I say calmly, trying not to let Thomas see I’m upset.

“Why is that?” Thomas asks, a little taken aback, and looks at me in irritation.

“I don’t feel so good. The wine… it was probably one glass too many,” I lie quickly, hoping he’ll buy it.

Luckily, Thomas nods and leads me to the bar so he can settle the bill. My gaze remains stubbornly fixed on the floor, even on my way out. I spare myself the sight because I don’t want to see Ezra pleasuring someone else.

I’m done with you once and for all!