CHAPTER 114 I’m Not in an Abusive Relationship with My Horse

CHAPTER 114

I’m Not in an Abusive Relationship with My Horse

Brownie

It was an hour later, a bit past noon, and she was technically supposed to be performing right now.

Or already eaten.

She knew it’d been an hour because [Calming Effect] had worn off.

“Repeat after me,” Rufus said, gently cupping her chin in his paw as they both sat facing the other on the bench. “ Donna is her own person .”

“Donna is her own person.”

“ I am not responsible for the actions of another .”

“I am not responsible for the actions of another,” she repeated, her eyes wandering off to the white butterfly as it fluttered about.

“This would be so much easier in a dungeon.” Rufus sighed.

“This would be—” Brownie cut herself off, smiling. “You can take me to your dungeon another day. Why am I not at fault? I rode with her across the continent. I’m her bonded companion. I was there .”

“You are her bonded companion and you were there, sure, and you can be responsible for your actions and choices at that time. Namely, you didn’t do anything.” He tried again. As had happened for the last hour, Rufus would answer her question with a simple statement and then explain further using anecdotes. “When a person is in a healthy relationship, both parties give and take of each other. In a toxic relationship, one partner puts their needs above the other without consideration. When it devolves into one person giving pain, and the other partner taking blame, then it’s moved into abuse. You made me do it. You deserved it. You should have been better .”

“I am not in an abusive relationship with my horse ,” Bronwynn protested.

“No,” Rufus agreed, “But right now you are behaving as if you were. You feel that Donna abused your trust. That she purposefully did things behind your back. ”

“I … Sure, but that’s not the same! I was the one who connected her with my family; I was the one who drove her places and provided her cover! I should’ve paid better attention! I was an accessory to an assassination quest! ”

“Bronwynn.” Rufus poked her playfully on the nose.

She covered it with both of her hands. “Hey.”

“It wasn’t your fault that I poked you on the nose, no matter how much your extremely cute and very pokable nose tempted me to do so. It was my thinking and my choice .”

“But that’s different ! You know the difference between right and wrong!” Brownie argued. “Donna’s a horse ! She doesn’t understand ethics! I should’ve been looking out for her, making sure she didn’t go down the wrong path!”

“You are still assuming responsibility for your companion? Do you think it would have been better to limit her freedom so you could control her?”

“No! I …”

“You do not own Donna. Donna is her own person. You cannot be responsible for the actions of another person.”

“Oh, I’m certainly not her owner,” Brownie acknowledged, then sighed. “Or even a close friend.”

After all that time they’d been together, Brownie thought she’d been closer to her horse. A Bond was still a bond… but they’d never really had the deep connection she’d hoped for. Brownie was Donna’s half giantess, and Donna was Brownie’s horse. That was just the way it was. And Donna had kept a healthy distance, with ample alone time granted to go apparently be an undercover assassin contract delivery mare.

Bonded companions were supposed to be friends of the heart, with a magic that bound the two in mind and spirit. Brownie hated how she’d had to corner her mare to tell her things, and that that had inspired the mare to finally open up.

Because Brownie had already loved her stupid horse.

Rufus repeated, “The person who was betrayed is not at fault. You are assuming guilt for the actions of another person because you feel responsible for her.”

“Yes? But doesn’t everyone take responsibility for the actions of their loved ones?” Brownie asked, discomfited.

“ No ,” Slake and Momo joined in, sounding offended, while Rufus gave his rebuke softly.

“Donna is not a child or a pet; she is her own person, and she makes her own choices. And if you think she isn’t fully capable of being responsible for her actions, then I think we need to call her over here so you can actually talk to your bonded companion.”

“Still …”

“If Jill burns down old Tammy’s inn, it’s nobody’s fault but Jill’s,” Rufus said, using one of her favorite songs to repeat the same point .

“I only eat people who deserve it,” Momo told Slake. “And Jill sounds delicious.”

Funnily enough, it was what Momo said that finally sparked something in Brownie’s subconscious. The grimalcat did eat people who were at fault, and it’d been almost a year since Donna had started delivering potions. If it’d truly been her fault … wouldn’t Momo have come for her sooner?

“Close your eyes and repeat after me,” Rufus repeated. “ Donna is her own person. I cannot be responsible for the actions of another .”

Brownie repeated the words, and as she did, for the barest moment, she wondered if maybe Rufus was right. Brownie had made her stance, had accepted the horse’s reasons, and felt guilty for letting it happen … but was she really at fault?

“She’s got it,” Momo spoke, and his large golden eyes that burned into her soul blinked slowly. “And now I need to find something else to eat.”

He sniffed once and got to his feet. The white butterfly was back, and he turned, his bum wiggling as he prepared to pounce.

In front of her, Rufus practically deflated , going from a supportive and relaxed counselor to an exhausted mess clinging to her shoulders in a desperate hug.

“Rufus?” Brownie reached up to put her arms around her beastman.

“Hmm,” he grumbled into her collarbone.

“I’m late for my show,” she pointed out. The festival was lively, but it lacked that musical touch.

Her beastman took another deep breath and then kissed her silly.