Chapter 9

As we headed towards one of the shopping malls in the commercial sector of the city, Belle and I chatted away happily. She was so incredibly easy to love, and at the opposite end of the spectrum from me exuberance-wise. While some people could find that type of personality overwhelming or irritating, I just found her endearing.

I could see myself becoming the BFF she was alluding to earlier. When Kayog first mentioned her, I instantly held the secret hope that we would hit it off so that I wouldn't feel so alone and isolated here. This first meeting exceeded all my expectations. Belle had become such a famous artist over the past six years that I feared she would be a major diva, with that obnoxious haughty attitude people developed when their egos grew out of proportion. She was sweet, laid back, and incredibly humble.

"I'm so happy Kayog found you for him," she suddenly blurted out. "Krogal is the best!"

I smiled and gave her an indulgent smile. It was quickly becoming apparent to me that she didn't have much of a filter. That, too, was fine with me. I hated hypocrites and backstabbers, having been surrounded by so many of them in my previous life. Her candor and bluntness were refreshing, especially as they didn't hide any malice or meanness.

"So far, he's proving to be really sweet," I concurred as we casually strolled on the sidewalk.

"He absolutely is!" she said with a firm nod. "Have you seen how he handles the animals he cares for?"

I nodded, my chest warming as his interactions with the adorable little Joree replayed in my mind. "He's so big and so strong, the gentle way he handles those pets is mind-boggling," I said pensively. "It's reassuring, although his size still intimidates me."

Belle chuckled while smiling sympathetically at me. "I hear you. I was quite worried about that, too, with Bayron. But we adapt. When the time comes, Krogal will be super patient and careful with you. It'll be fine. In fact, I have no doubt it will be great."

I gaped at her, and my cheeks felt on the verge of bursting into flames. "Oh my God! I didn't mean that!"

Belle's jaw dropped, and her pale skin turned a bright shade of crimson. "Oh! Oops, sorry," she said with an embarrassed giggle. "I misunderstood."

Despite my own embarrassment, she was so incredibly cute that I just wanted to hug her. To my shock, my mouth also ran away with me.

"But since you've brought it up…" I said, my cheeks heating a bit more.

She snorted and gave me a knowing smile filled with mischief. "All I can say is that you two are soulmates. Therefore, you are made for each other, and all the parts that matter will fit as they are meant to. I'm sure it will be intimidating at first, like it was for me. But Zamorian males take their roles as a protector very seriously, and Krogal is definitely no exception. He won't rush you, and he'll take great care of you."

I nodded, feeling a little baffled that such a thought would even enter my mind so early on in our relationship. Still, it was great having someone I could discuss this with.

"And don't worry about him being double endowed," she added with a nervous giggle, her smile broadening when I visibly flinched. "There's no need to use both at the same time. It took many months before we eventually got around to that, and even then, there's no obligation to ever do it with both simultaneously."

"Oh, God!" I said, pressing both palms against my burning cheeks.

"Sorry if that was too much information!" she added sheepishly, although the teasing glimmer in her eyes hinted that she was enjoying embarrassing me.

"You're not sorry at all," I countered, playfully glaring at her.

"I am!" Belle exclaimed, with an exaggerated air of innocence. "Well okay, not totally but at least a little bit."

I snorted and shook my head at her. Although it had indeed been way too much information, I welcomed it as that question had plagued me. Receiving confirmation that this could be a gradual process gave me a major sense of relief.

"So I guess it's safe to say that you're happy with your husband?" I asked, eager to shift the topic to a less spicy terrain.

"I'm over the moon!" she exclaimed with a huge grin. "When I went to Kayog so he could find my Beast, I never imagined he would match me with a Zamorian. But Bayron exceeded all my wildest hopes."

"Your Beast?" I exclaimed, taken aback as we were closing in on the shopping mall.

She laughed and gave me a sheepish grin. "Yes. I am what you could call a proud monster fudger. My whole life, I dreamt of marrying a strange alien. I wanted to be Belle, like in the fairy tale, but where the Beast would not turn into some pretty human, and remain exactly how he was when she first fell in love with him."

I burst out laughing. That woman was a riot. "I will grant you that I also thought the Beast was way hotter in his monster form than as a human."

"Totally! My perfect mate didn't turn out to be as beastly as I imagined, but he's more than alien enough for me. And above all, he's the most amazing husband I could have ever dreamt of."

My heart melted at the wistful and dreamy expression on her face as she thought of her husband. Belle was truly in love with him, and I could only pray that my own ‘Beast' and I would achieve the same type of happiness.

"Bayron really helped me deal with my body image issues," she added, emotion seeping into her voice as she absent-mindedly ran her fingertips over her exposed belly.

I couldn't help a glance before quickly averting my eyes.

She chuckled. "It's okay to look. After all, there's a reason I'm wearing a crop top and a low-waist skirt like most Zamorian females here," Belle said teasingly. "I've always been chubby. Having two Zamorian babies—each of whom are quite massive—gave me extra skin and a lot more stretch marks. I was so ashamed about it. But Bayron put an end to that real quick."

My curiosity piqued, I glanced back a bit more openly at her stomach. She was undeniably plus size, but nowhere near anything that would be deemed unhealthy. A network of stretch marks crisscrossed her belly, which was wrinkled from excess skin. On Earth, women would indeed be shamed into hiding it, or would hurry to have surgery to remove it. With today's technology, it would easily be done and leave flawless skin behind.

From the moment I'd seen her walk into the clinic in her colorful outfit, I wondered why she didn't get that surgery. After all, between her own successful artistic career and her husband's countless formidable hunts, they had plenty of credits to afford such a simple procedure.

"My mate said that they were my battle trophies and demanded I flaunt them. He wanted me to show off to the whole world how my small body handled his massive twins without faltering when nobody thought I could pull it off," she said, pride shining brightly in both her voice and expression. "On Earth, I would have hidden it. Here, I am praised and admired for it."

"Because they truly are trophies," I said, with the oddest mix of admiration and shame.

My instinctive far-too-human reaction had indeed been to think she should hide what we stupidly qualified as imperfections.

She beamed at me. "You're going to love it here. Everything and everyone are awesome, and especially supportive. Women are highly respected and protected. The fact that this is a matriarchy certainly plays a role in it. But they seriously have a lot of things right here."

"I'm glad to hear it," I said with a grin.

As we reached the large doors of the shopping mall, Belle and I exchanged an uncertain look. Both of us waited for the other to step in first as the doors automatically parted before us.

"I'm the newbie here," I said preemptively.

She scrunched her face at me. "But you're the taller one," she argued.

I snorted and shook my head. "That means nothing. Krogal entrusted me in your care. I'm lost and clueless about this world. Therefore, I totally depend on you."

Belle once more made a face and muttered something under her breath. Chuckling, I followed her inside as we made our way towards one of the countless fashion boutiques.

Saying I loved the sexy outfits the women here normally wore would be quite the understatement. While I wasn't the exhibitionist type, I liked looking hot and showing a bit of skin, without being vulgar. I had great legs and a nice figure, so miniskirts and tight-fitting dresses were usually my go to. Here, the skirts ranged from very short to ankle-length for women, and kilt-length for males. Long skirts usually had thigh-high slits that gave a naughty glimpse of a woman's legs with each movement. Crop tops of every style and size, as well as cut-out dresses were also a thing.

Although they could, females rarely wore pants on Xoccoris. I didn't mind as I'd always been the girly-girl type.

I spent the next eternity modeling an obscene number of outfits for Belle. I couldn't remember the last time I had this much fun just hanging out with a female friend. My throat tightened once again at remembering just how much Liam kept me isolated, slowly but surely driving away anyone I knew, cutting off my entire support system so that I became entirely dependent on him.

"Have you ever thought about modeling?" Belle suddenly asked, chasing away my somber thoughts.

"I've done some," I said shyly while running my hands over the soft fabric of the blue dress I just tried on. "Before I launched into a singing and dancing career, I modeled for some magazines and fashion shows to get my name and face out there."

She pursed her lips with a speculative glimmer in her blue eyes. "You're so beautiful, I think you would make a wonderful model posing with some of the cute pets right here on Xoccoris. I would love to make a collection with you."

My eyes nearly popped out of my head while images of me cuddling with the adorable little Joree flashed before my mind's eye.

"Really?! That would be super cool! I love animals—well, the cute and cuddly ones," I added with excitement.

"Yes, absolutely! I would pay you for it, too, at the standard model rate," Belle said with enthusiasm.

I couldn't wipe the grin off my face. Aside from the thrill of modeling with cute pets—which I had done on a few contracts in the past—the perspective of earning some money of my own while I studied had me over the moon.

"You've got yourself a deal," I replied.

"Awesome!"

We finished shopping in an amiable atmosphere. As Krogal warned me, when we went through the cash, they automatically charged my purchases to his account. Considering the many outfits, accessories, and shoes I bought, a sliver of guilt wanted to worm its way inside me. Belle insisting I had actually been too reserved in my spending made me feel a little better.

We headed back home to drop off our purchases—Belle having acquired a few things for herself as well. Knowing that she lived only one floor above us in the Skortheatis fortress was an added bonus. That meant we could hang out often when she wasn't traveling the stars with her hunter husband.

The setup of the city was pretty cool with each main bloodlines of the clan owning their individual fortress within the city. Although our fortress was the most impressive—which made sense as it housed the clan's Matriarch and her husband the Clan Chieftain—the others also rivaled in style. Furthermore, the head of the family of each of those other bloodlines served as one of the Chieftain's generals.

We entered the building—which reminded me of the cyberpunk version of an industrial castle—through the massive entrance doors. On each side of the large hallway, life-size statues of Zamorian warriors lined the walls at regular intervals until we reached the intersection. It gave access to the corridors on the left and the right which led to the elevators to the individual dwellings. Straight ahead, about twenty meters in front of us, another set of adorned heavy doors hid the Gathering Hall where we would convene shortly for the assembly.

We entered the left corridor and hopped inside the lift to my house floor, one level below the penthouses where Bayron and Belle lived. When we reached our destination, the elevator doors opened with a soft swish on a tall Zamorian female, waiting to go down. For a split second, I thought she was Feidin. But she didn't have the Matriarch's midnight-blue hair and yellow eyes. Hers were both black.

"Hello, Talin," Belle said as the female took a few steps back to let us out.

My polite smile froze on my lips under the intensity of her gaze.

"Hello, Belle," Talin said without glancing at her, too focused on examining me like a foreign creature that defied logic. "So… you're Krogal's mate."

I didn't know how to interpret her tone. It wasn't contemptuous, but it also didn't qualify as warm or welcoming. Confused, I gave Belle a sideways glance.

"Talin, this is Farah Toussaint, Krogal's mate. Farah, this is Talin, Krogal's mother," Belle said, a sliver of tension in her voice.

My spine immediately stiffened. While Krogal had given me a general idea of the source of the tension between him and his mother, he never mentioned how she felt about our union. Did she disapprove of a human for her firstborn? She seemed cordial enough with Belle, who didn't display any dislike towards the female, only unease likely due to Talin's fallout with Krogal.

"Hello, Talin," I said politely.

She pursed her lips and gave me a slow once-over that made me want to squirm. As much as I could now see the resemblance between her and her sister Feidin, her expression held none of the warmth and charisma of the latter.

"You're pretty enough," she said in a semi-approving tone. "I can see how you would stir the protective instincts of one such as my Krogal. But you're too small and fragile. I don't see how you will ever be able to bear him any offspring."

That struck me hard. Even though she spoke the words more as one would when musing out loud, and once again without any apparent malice or disdain, it still hurt and offended me. Before I could respond, Belle rushed to my defense.

"You all said the same thing about me," she countered forcefully. "And yet, aren't my children thriving? Did I not carry twins to term without faltering? Do not underestimate us human women. We may be fragile in appearance, but we're tough inside and when it matters."

I could have hugged her right then. But the grateful and affectionate smile I cast her way immediately faded when Talin huffed this time with audible disdain.

"You're better padded. She's just skin and bones," she replied dismissively.

This time I bristled and placed my hand on Belle's shoulder to keep her from speaking when she opened her mouth to respond.

"I see you don't approve of me," I said sternly as I lifted my chin defiantly.

"Why would I?" she hissed. "You cost me my son!"

"Like hell I did!" I exclaimed. "You did that on your own by trying to force him to be someone other than who he is. Your actions drove him away. Whether me or another female, whoever he chose would have still landed you in the same position because you're trying to impose your will and desires on him."

"I'm trying to better him, you ignorant girl! He's wasting his time bandaging pets and wild animals instead of being a proper protector," she snapped. "As his wife, you should push him to do better. Is that truly the type of mate you want?"

"Yes!" I exclaimed. "Bashing skulls, using violence, and intimidation are easy paths for a male to follow. Believe me, I know it all too well. Only a truly strong man can rein in such primal urges. I've just met Krogal, but the past forty-eight hours are the safest I felt in the past seven years. All of that is thanks to him! So yes, Madam, he is exactly the mate I want, just the way he is."

She shook her head at me as if I was a hopeless case. The depth of disappointment in her eyes cut me deep, reflecting the one I had seen far too many times in my own mother's eyes. And yet, instead of breaking me, it sparked an even stronger urge to fight, to stand up for my man.

"I don't have my mother anymore," I suddenly said, my throat tightening as an old pain resurfaced. "She pushed me away by trying to force me to follow a specific path that I didn't want for myself. She was doing it out of love, but she only made me resent her, and drove me into the arms of someone even worse. My ex crushed me, slowly eroded who I was to shape me into what and who he wanted me to be. I lost any sense of self and was slowly dying while he kept me sequestered inside a gilded cage until I finally found the strength to escape before he completely destroyed what was left of me."

"If you had listened to your mother—" Talin interjected.

"I would have also lost myself, but in a different way. Both were destroying me for their own agendas and desires. Now, she's dead. I will never be able to tell her that despite how much she hurt me, I still loved her. You cannot understand how deeply it crushes the soul when the person who's supposed to love you the most is constantly bringing you down, belittling you, and criticizing you because you don't fit what they think you should be."

"I am sorry you lost your mother, but the Zamorian culture is different," she said in a slightly gentler tone.

"Every culture is the same when it comes to the love that should exist between a mother and her child, and the support we need from our parents," I said in a tone that brooked no argument. "You want your son back? Stop trying to squash the parts of him that don't fit your ideals. Love him. All of him, just the way he is. The distance between you hurts him."

"He doesn't care," she said dismissively, although I could see the hurt and pain she was trying to hide.

I'd seen that look on my mother's face when she tried to get back into my life after I severed all ties with her.

"Yes, he does," I said more softly, my anger giving way to a sliver of sympathy—not to say pity. "Krogal only told me that you didn't support his career choices. But I could hear the pain in his voice and see it on his face. I understand that pain all too well for having gone through it myself. It's too late for my mom and me. Don't let it be too late with your son. Whatever you may think, he really does love you. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get prepared for the assembly."

With one last nod, I squeezed past Talin and headed for our apartment. I didn't trust myself not to start bawling my eyes out. This was too vivid a flashback of a terrible past I worked so hard at burying. At the same time, there had been something cathartic about voicing this aloud.

I didn't turn back until I reached the door, the pitter patter of Belle's feet following in my wake. When I opened the door and stepped inside, holding it for Belle, I caught a glimpse of Talin, still standing in front of the elevator, head slightly bowed and hugging herself with her two sets of arms. My heart constricted further for the female. I didn't know her, but I believed she genuinely loved Krogal in her own clumsy and heavy-handed way.

In that instant, I swore to myself I would get those two to patch things up.

The minute we crossed the antechamber and closed the inner doors behind us, Belle squealed before giving me the biggest hug. Stunned, I instinctively returned it. Although brief, it did wonders for me.

"Oh my God, woman, you were every shade of badass!" Belle exclaimed. "Talin is a freaking dragon! People usually cower before her, but you were all like ‘Nuh-uh! I ain't putting up with your shit' and held your ground. That was epic!"

I couldn't help but laugh in front of such enthusiasm. "No kidding, she's quite intimidating. Honestly, I can't believe I spoke to her like that. But this gaslighting, this bullshit about blaming him for her faults, I just couldn't take it."

"That sounds personal," she said in a gentle tone.

I heaved a sigh and nodded as I headed towards my bedroom to drop the bags. "As you probably heard, I ran from an abusive relationship that lasted seven freaking years. In the past year spent in the shelter, I was lucky enough to have access to some therapy to help me recognize and call out gaslighting. He was so good at doing terrible things and then making me feel like I was the bad one, that I made him do it. Man, it felt so good calling that shit out."

"You go girl!" Belle exclaimed. "I absolutely loved it. I'm so glad Krogal found you. There's no question in my mind the two of you are going to be extremely happy."

"I hope so," I said sincerely while freeing her of two of the bags she carried for me. "He seems really nice. I just need to relax and let him in instead of constantly having my guard up."

"Farah, take your time," Belle said this time with a gentle seriousness that sharply contrasted with her usually exuberant ways. "Krogal will wait however long you need. He's in no rush. He's just happy to have finally found you. You should have seen what a nervous wreck he was while waiting for your arrival. My only advice is for you not to waste any cuddle opportunities."

I chuckled as heat creeped into my cheeks. "He does give some of the best hugs."

"I totally believe it. I can't get enough of my Bayron cocooning me in those massive arms of his. You know, you should sit in his lap at the assembly," she said with conviction.

"Oh, my God! I can't do that!" I exclaimed.

She looked at me as if I had said something so dumb she was starting to question my intelligence. "Of course you can and should! It's going to make him extremely proud. Above all, it's going to make the others so jealous. They tease Bayron and me constantly for it, but I can see them all drooling with envy. Do it!"

I grunted in a noncommittal fashion in a way surprisingly similar to how Krogal responded when I would say things he didn't fully agree with, like adopting little Joree.

That made me smile.

Maybe sitting in his lap wouldn't be so outrageous…