8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Lacey

"I kissed a boy."

The words slip out and there's no stopping the smile taking over my face. Wesley's jaw hits the ground and Nico leans over to give me a high five.

"With tongue?"

"Dude." My brother snaps his mouth shut with a groan, "Why do you always have to take it too far?"

"What? I didn't ask if she dropped to her knees and gave him a blowjob."

I hold up my hand, "I'm right here. And yes, there was tongue."

Nico beams, "That's my girl."

Wesley shudders and refocuses his attention on setting up the dorm's ancient television. Sunday movie nights used to be a tradition growing up, and out of nowhere, Wesley declared it was finally time to reintroduce the tradition. Trip decided to sit the first one out, and as much as I love her company, I am grateful to have some quality time with my brother and my closest friend.

Grabbing the pile of mismatched blankets from the couch, I drop them onto the floor. Nico steals the closest one and wraps it around me with a grin.

"I need more details about this kiss. Name, number, location. Go."

I laugh, "His name is Skylar, his number is in my phone, and it happened in an empty football stadium."

Wesley whips his head in my direction, "What were you doing alone in an empty stadium?"

Nico rolls his eyes, "She was hunting for the most romantic make out setting possible. Need I remind you who followed an innocent freshman into a courtyard first-year?"

"That was different."

"Ignore him." Nico wraps his arms around me and picks me up with a shriek, "What's important is our girl is back out playing the field!"

"Pun intended." Wesley blows out a breath, "Was he a gentleman at least?"

I bury my face into Nico's neck and smile, "He was perfectly respectable. Didn't make a move until I asked him too."

Nico pulls a face, "He didn't make the first move?"

My brother shakes his head, "Lacey needs someone with a lot of patience. Someone who won't expect anything right away. "

The truth of his words slap me in the face, the sting leaving my cheeks flushed pink.

"You don't have to make me sound like a freak." I swallow the lump rising in my throat, "Not everyone has sex on the first date, you know. Or the third date for that matter."

Guilt filters through Wesley's face, his green eyes apologizing to me even before I extract myself from Nico's arms and walk into the bathroom. I lock the door and lean against it, feeling my chest start to cave in.

A gentle knock hits the door.

"I wasn't calling you a freak, Lace. I just meant you need someone who isn't just trying to get into your pants. You're special, Garden Girl, and you deserve someone who appreciates that about you."

I hang my head, refusing to acknowledge the broken girl in the mirror, "I am a freak, Wesley. What kind of eighteen-year-old doesn't want to have sex?"

"Speaking from a brotherly point of view, knowing that my baby sister doesn't want to have sex is the best news I've heard all day."

I choke out a laugh and he continues, "But that doesn't make you a freak, Lace. It makes you an intelligent woman who knows her limits."

"But what kind of guy would be willing to wait?"

What kind of guy would be willing to wait for me?

Wesley sighs, "A decent one. And by the sounds of it, you may have already found him. "

Wrapping my arms around myself, I hunch over, wishing that Skylar was here. Not because he's the boy I kissed but because he's my friend.

A broken sound escapes me and the bathroom door starts to rattle.

"Lacey? I need you to open this door."

I freeze, hearing the panic flood his voice. The handle continues to rattle and I hear Nico let out a stream of curses on the other side.

"Mi amor? Come on out so we can talk this through. Don't lock us out again."

Again.

The girl in the mirror widens her eyes and I stare at her. It's the same face I saw the night I took my mother's sleeping pills, but this time I turn and unlock the door.

My brother rushes in and crushes me into a hug.

"I didn't mean to scare you." I squeeze him back, guilt washing over me.

"You can hide in your room or another building, but no more bathrooms okay?" Wesley pulls back and gives me a weak smile, "I fucking hate bathrooms."

Nico shoves him aside and scoops me up, "I've got the perfect remedy for this evening. Three words, one football stadium."

" A Cinderella Story ?"

"You got it, babe." Nico carries me over to the blankets covering the ground and plops me down right beside him. Throwing a blanket over my legs, he turns me into a burrito before making himself comfortable.

"It's time to see if the real life version matches the charm of Chad Michael Murray." Nico grins and tosses my brother the remote, "Do you have your earmuffs ready?"

Wesley flips him off before snatching a blanket and joining us on the ground. I lean against his shoulder and he pulls me close.

"I'm sorry for upsetting you, I just…" His voice breaks and I clutch him tighter, "I just don't think I can stand seeing you hurt again."

The stitches holding my heart together start to rip as the consequence of my actions fall apart beside me. Wesley's shoulders shake as he holds me, the splash of his tears on my cheeks making my own start to fall.

"I'm not going to leave you."

My voice is barely above a whisper, the pain of my past radiating through the person I love the most. When my ex-boyfriend hurt me, I didn't even try to hurt him back. Instead, I did something so much worse.

I turned the pain onto myself and tried to leave everyone I loved behind.

Wesley squeezes me tightly, "You better not. I can't be stuck with Nico for the rest of my life."

Nico sniffs indignantly, "You would be blessed to spend the rest of your life in my presence."

I laugh, wiping away my brother's tears before my own. There's been so many mornings when I've wanted to give up and let the darkness take me, but seeing the impact it had on my family made me realize that sometimes you don't live for yourself.

Sometimes you have to do it for someone else.

"Are you ready for a cinematic masterpiece, mon frère?" Pulling out the rustiest French accent I can manage, I give Wesley my best impersonation of a car salesman.

He grins, popping out a couple of dimples, "Mais oui. Nico, press le button."

Nico groans, "Both of you, put the horrific French accents away. You're giving me PTSD from our last code red." He gives Wesley the stink eye, "When you ignored my pleas to stop."

I smile, "Sounds like the perfect wingman to me."

"I was phenomenal. Do you know how hard it is to get down on your knees when your assistant coach is waiting, buck-ass naked, in your doorway?" Wesley shakes his head, bringing up a hand to protect his heart, "That's the real trauma right there."

Nico smirks, "If you're blessed to be in my presence, you were fucking baptized when you saw Mo's fine ass. My man is hung like a horse."

Wesley frowns, "I'm pretty sure I've seen bigger."

I stare at him, "Why are you checking out naked men? You're in a relationship."

"Don't be so judgmental. I'm a curious guy, that's all."

Nico snorts, "He likes to know where he falls on the size scale. "

My brother nods in agreement, "I like to confirm I'm above average. It's good for the morale."

Grimacing, I lean over and snatch the remote out of Nico's hands.

"It's time to end this conversation. Are you guys ready for the movie?"

"Let's do it."

Skylar

I tap my eraser against my desk, trying to calm my nerves.

The number on the clock mocks me, it's digits slowly getting closer to midnight. I blow out a breath and reach for my phone.

She's probably asleep by now. Chances are it'll go to voicemail anyways.

I hesitate, my finger hovering over Lacey's number. It's only been 12 hours since I dropped her off but I want to talk to her again. I want to hear her voice, make her laugh, and maybe learn another secret.

It's only been 12 hours and my heart hasn't been the same since.

Blowing out a breath, I think through all the reasons this is a terrible idea. I mean, do people even call each other anymore?

Fuck it.

Pressing the call button, my heart rattles in my ribcage as I wait for the line to connect. I hold my breath, continuing through the list of why this is a horrible idea when Lacey picks up .

"Skylar?"

At the sound of her voice, I almost drop my phone. Gulping down a breath, I glance over my shoulder to make sure my bedroom door is safely shut.

"Hey, Flower." I clear my throat, "Sorry I know it's late…"

"No, this is great. I was hoping you would call." She pauses and I find myself pressing the phone tighter against my ear, "This might sound weird, but I was thinking about you today."

An ache hits my cheeks as my lips tug up.

"I was thinking about you too."

There's silence on the other end and I can't help but wish we were in person so I could see what type of smile is spreading across her face right now.

"Would you want to hang out again? My schedule is pretty free this week." She hesitates, "There's no pressure, of course."

"How does tomorrow sound? I could pick you up and take you to the little bookshop."

Lacey lets out a gasp, "I would love that! My little library hasn't grown in so long."

"You have a library?"

She sighs, "Not really. I have a small collection of romance novels precariously stacked between my textbooks and mound of plants."

"A library and a greenhouse? I'm starting to wonder where you sleep."

Laughter echoes down the line and warmth seeps through me. Pushing back from my desk, I wander over to my bed and lie down. The popcorn ceiling has seen better days, but the white canvas makes it easier to picture Lacey's smiling face.

"It's a tight fit but I make it work. Taber University has the world's smallest dorm rooms, so we only get a single bed and a desk that sits two feet away."

"Sounds cozy."

"It is, actually. I've put in enough effort to make the room feel like my own." She lets out an awkward laugh, "Sorry, this isn't really interesting. Just tell me to stop when you get bored."

I frown, "Boring is not a word I associate with you."

"That might change after you see me in the bookstore tomorrow."

"How could it? I'll get to be with you."

She sucks in a breath and I clutch my phone tighter.

"I didn't mean for that to sound cheesy." I run a nervous hand through my hair, "I'm just looking forward to seeing you again."

Silence falls between us. Staring up at the ceiling, I start tracing invisible bellflowers in my head, wondering if Lacey has washed off the piece I drew for her yet.

"Can I tell you a secret?"

"Always."

She pauses and my breathing follows suit.

"You might be the most romantic person I've ever met."

A quiet laugh escapes me, "I'm just being honest."

"Well, you should keep doing it. I like it. "

I can hear the smile in her voice and there's no amount of money I wouldn't give to be able to see it right now.

"I'll keep that in mind."

Lacey makes a satisfied sound, "Good. Now, tell me about you."

There's movement on the other end of the line and I picture Lacey shuffling around a tiny dorm room overflowing with colourful books and blossoming plants. The image has my lips pulling upwards.

"What do you want to know?"

"Everything."

Everything.

The air disappears from my chest.

Most people write me off as the sullen younger brother of the town's bully, the guy with the weird eyes and a sketchbook under one arm. But Lacey isn't asking about the reputation that has stained the family name.

She's asking about me.

I swallow, sweeping my eyes around my room. I can't remember the last time someone genuinely wanted to know me, so I have no idea where to begin.

My sketchbook catches my eye and I decide to go with the obvious.

"Well, I like to draw."

Lacey laughs, "I already know that. Tell me something else."

My cheeks grow warm as embarrassment hits me.

"I don't know what to say. I'm not that interesting. "

"That's not true. You're creative, funny, thoughtful, and played tag with me in an empty stadium last night. If that doesn't scream interesting, then I don't know what does."

The crack in my chest grows wider with every kind word that floats down the line.

"Okay, I have an idea." Excitement leaks into Lacey's voice, "We'll do five minutes of speed dating. I had to do this as an icebreaker in my management class and it was actually pretty fun."

"What do I have to do?"

"It's easy. I'll ask you a series of questions and you just have to answer."

Nerves hit me and I grip my phone tighter. It's a silly game but I don't want to disappoint her.

"Okay."

"Are you ready?"

I've never been less ready for anything in my life.

Shaking my head at the wall, I gulp down a breath, "I think so."

"Okay! Here we go. What's your favourite colour?"

"Purple." I hesitate, wondering if two answers are allowed, "But green has recently became a favourite as well."

"Ooh, I love purple. Light or dark?"

"Dark."

My mind flashes to the violent bruises that used to cover my mother's body. The black and blue skin would swirl together in the most beautiful way, and I always wondered why such beauty came at such a high cost.

Lacey clucks her tongue, "Very nice. Favourite hobby that isn't drawing?"

"I like to run."

She gasps, "I knew it! You made running that football stadium look easy."

"Wasn't it?"

"No, Skylar. It was not." Laughter escapes her, "I thought I was going to have an asthma attack last night. You're lucky my coordination took me down before I lost a lung."

My eyes widen in alarm, "Do you have asthma?"

"No. I'm just that out of shape." She blows a raspberry and redirects the conversation back to the questions.

The five minute mark slips by but we keep playing the game, taking turns asking each other superficial questions while the night slowly creeps by.

"Favourite flower?"

"I don't have one."

Lacey heaves a sigh, "Everyone has a favourite flower, Skylar. You just haven't acknowledged it yet."

"I apologize for the ignorance."

She laughs, "You're forgiven. Now, answer the question."

Shaking my head, I smile up at the ceiling, "I need a moment to think about this. What's your favourite flower?"

"Azaleas."

"I'm going to have to Google that one."

Laughter echoes down the line and my smile grows wider.

"It's a flowery shrub with bright, delicate flowers. They're very pretty but surprisingly fragile if you don't take care of them properly." She hesitates, "You have to drain the soil properly so it doesn't drown, but not everyone takes the time to understand that."

There's a vulnerability in her voice that wasn't there before. I fall silent, knowing we aren't talking about azaleas anymore.

Lacey sighs, "It's getting late. We should probably turn in."

I chew my lip, debating my next move. She hasn't brought up the suicide attempt or the situation with her ex-boyfriend, so I don't want to push.

"I think the most beautiful things in life take the most effort." I speak slowly, trying not to overstep, "Even if it does take a little longer to help it grow."

Her breathing goes shallow, "But what if it doesn't turn out the way you want it to?"

"If someone's heart is set on a single outcome, then there's only one solution."

"What's that?"

"You buy a fake plant."

Lacey bursts out laughing, "That's one way to put it."

I shrug even though she can't see me, "Having something turn out exactly the way you imagined it sounds a lot more boring than discovering new features along the way."

"Maybe you're right." The smile shines through her voice, "Thank you. "

"Nothing to thank me for. I'll see you in a few hours, okay?"

"Okay. Goodnight, Skylar."

"Goodnight, Flower."

Ending the call, I set my phone down and pull off my shirt. I crawl under the covers, glancing at the clock one last time to count down the number of hours until I get to see Lacey again.

A smile breaks across my face as a rare thought crosses my mind.

Tomorrow is going to be a good day.