17. Chapter 17

Chapter 1 7

Lacey

Skylar is really good at giving head.

The clues were there, like when he pulled off my panties using just his teeth, but it still came as a shock when he swiped his tongue across my clit like he owned it.

My hips haven't stopped bucking against his mouth, but Skylar doesn't seem to mind. He murmurs quiet encouragement against my core, continuing the slow and steady torture of his strokes. The ache between my legs builds with each pass of his tongue, the hot pressure of his mouth making me desperate for more.

"Faster, Skylar. I need you to go faster."

He responds by slipping his tongue inside me and I moan, reaching out to grab his hair. He makes a satisfied sound when I thread my fingers through the white strands, gripping them tightly .

Skylar flicks his eyes up to mine, the lust filling each iris knocking the breath right out of my chest. His mouth is fused to my pussy and he's looking at me like there isn't a place he would rather be.

His fingers slide up to play with my clit while he continues to fuck me with his tongue. Another moan slips out of me and I rock against his face, trying to increase the pace. His fingers respond in earnest, rubbing the sensitive bud exactly how I told him to the last time.

"Oh my God." I gasp at the pressure building inside of me, unlike anything I have ever experienced before.

Skylar leans forward and captures my clit with his teeth. He bites down gently before sucking it back into his mouth, triggering my pending release to arrive.

I cry out his name, gripping his hair like it's the only thing tethering me to the ground. Skylar keeps going all the way through, only slowing down after my orgasm has passed and I'm left shaking and unable to hold myself upright.

He kisses my swollen bud one last time before pulling away.

"You did so well, Flower. I'm so proud of you."

I blush at the praise, watching Skylar lick the last bit of residue off his lips. All I did was let him eat me like a main course and yet he makes me feel like I did something special.

He makes me feel like I'm something special.

"I didn't do anything."

Skylar shakes his head, "Not true. You did the most important part. "

"What's that?"

"You trusted me."

My face breaks into a wide smile as the broken pieces of Skylar's heart weld onto mine.

"I, uh, might need to take a quick shower before going to bed."

He shifts uncomfortably on the ground and that's when I notice the erection tenting the front of his pants. My eyes go wide as I take in the outline of his dick, the tip of it pressing angrily through the beige material of his pants.

It looks really painful.

"Do you me want to…" I trial off, waiting for him to finish the sentence. Compared to Skylar's quiet confidence about sex, I feel awkward and inexperienced when it comes to things as simple as a blowjob.

I have done it before, but only because it was expected. I never got the opportunity to discover my partner's pleasure because it was never an option for me. Jerrell made the rules clear and firm, using guilt and manipulation to force my hand or my mouth to do the things he wanted.

It sounds pathetic, but at the time I didn't know any better.

I do now.

Skylar studies me silently, his eyes seeing far more than they should.

"No. You've done enough tonight." He pushes himself off the ground with a wince and walks to my door, "I'll be back soon. "

I watch him leave, feeling the humiliation of my past crashing down on me. It's been over two years, and I still can't get my ex-boyfriend out of my head.

It's been over two years and I'm still not normal.

Closing my eyes against the surge of tears, I hear the shower turn on just outside my bedroom door. I listen to the sound of water running, picturing Skylar stripping off his clothes and hopping in to jerk himself off.

All because I let some douchebag pressure me into sex.

Anger cuts through me, targeting the cowardly state of my current self. I just had the best sexual experience of my life, and here I am, letting the shadows of my past keep me from discovering the kind and thoughtful boy who buys me romance books.

Skylar deserves better.

I deserve better.

Swallowing the fear rising in my throat, I snag my shorts from the ground and wiggle them on. I tiptoe from my bedroom to the bathroom door, hesitating before I slip inside.

The dorm's bathroom separates into two stalls, one for the toilet and one for the shower. A quick glance confirms my roommate isn't hiding out in the bathroom stall. I take a shaky breath and knock on the closed door of the shower.

"Skylar?"

There's a moment of silence, then, "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I just…" An abundance of nerves hit me and it takes me a moment to swallow the lump in my throat .

"I was wondering if I could join you."

The lock clicks open and Skylar peeks his head out. Wet hair is plastered against his forehead and water droplets slip down his face. He looks younger like this, less like the haunted boy I've gotten to know and more like the one I've always seen.

"You want to shower with me?"

His eyes rake down my face, peering through the mask nobody else seems to get past.

"Yeah." Breaking eye contact, I look down at my chipped fingernails, "If that's okay."

"I'm not wearing any clothes."

A laugh slips out, "I think that's the point of a shower."

Skylar studies me for a moment longer before disappearing back behind the door. I stare at it, at a loss for what to do, when it shifts open. Steam sneaks through the crack, the hot humidity washing over my skin in the most inviting way.

I'm trembling when I slip out of my clothes and kick them over to where Skylar's lie neatly folded. Refusing to give myself a second to think, I pull open the door and step inside.

The steam of the hot water smacks me in the face, enveloping my naked body as I shut the door gently behind me. Skylar is watching me, his eyes carefully trained on my face.

I stare back at him, struggling to remember how to breathe. Nerves and fear have me glued to the spot, and now I'm wondering if maybe I do have asthma from the way my lungs have stopped working.

"So… do you come here often? "

He delivers the line with a straight face but it works to break the tension. A giggle slips out of my mouth and the humid air flows back into my lungs.

"About once a day. How about you?"

He shrugs, "First time."

I laugh and inch a little bit closer. Skylar flicks his eyes down my body, the slow perusal making my skin flush with awareness. He swallows and it suddenly dawns on me that there is not a lot of space in this shower stall.

"Are you shaking because you're cold or because you're scared?"

"Both." I admit sheepishly, crossing my arms over my chest, "I've never done this before."

"Had a shower? It's actually pretty easy."

I laugh, "No, I've done that. Showering is the one thing I am good at."

Skylar tilts his head, "You're good at a lot of things, Flower. But maybe you could show me how it's done."

He reaches up and grabs the shampoo balancing precariously on the shelf above us. I study the harsh lines of his body, admiring the lean juts of bone and muscle pushing through pale skin. Nico was right, Skylar is on the skinny side, but I wouldn't want him any other way.

My eyes drop to the one part of him I haven't seen yet.

The books I read put a lot of emphasize on size, but honestly, I've never really given much thought to a guy's dick size before. My one and only sexual experience was so traumatic that I didn't have time to wonder if the anatomy hurting me was above average or not.

Staring at Skylar's dick though, I can see why people get hyper focused on size. He's not big but it still manages to bring a blush to my face.

Because I think it might be the perfect size.

"Hold out your hands."

He smiles, clearly having caught me checking out his junk. Giving him a sheepish smile, I hold out my hands and he pours shampoo on them.

"Are you going to watch me wash my hair?"

"No." Skylar takes my hands and pulls me closer, "I'm going to wash your hair and you're going to wash mine."

"Oh."

I close my eyes as he guides me into the stream of hot water. Goosebumps rise along my skin as the warmth rushes through me. Gentle fingers tilt my head back, ducking my head under the water. The cool slide of shampoo hits my hair before Skylar starts massaging it in, his wet body gently pressing against mine.

Lathering the liquid in my hands, I reach up and thread my hands through his damp hair, watching the way his eyes flutter down at my touch. Rubbing my fingers against his scalp, I scrape my nails over his ears and down the back of his neck, leaving a trail of bubbles in my wake.

Giddiness rises up inside me and I scoop up more shampoo to smear it along his chest. Laughter escapes as I dab bubbles along his torso, casually decorating his nipples and belly button with white foam.

"Someone's caught her second wind."

Amusement dances through Skylar's gaze when he looks at me, the smile in his eyes almost as beautiful as the one painting his face.

I give him a modest shrug, "Just practicing my art skills."

"Uh huh."

Skylar steals a clump of foam from his chest and smears it on mine. I shriek and jump back, but he manages to trap me in the corner and smear more bubbles across my cheek. I'm so busy laughing that I don't notice how close we are until I feel the nudge against my stomach.

I look down and see the tip of his cock pressing against me.

Skylar

My dick is becoming a serious problem.

It used to be a piece of my anatomy that laid low and didn't cause any issues. I would almost go as far as to say I had admirable control over it.

Not anymore.

The moment Lacey gives me a lingering glance or brushes my skin with her fingers, it's game over. I have absolutely no control when it comes to my flower, and evidently, my dick feels the same way.

The hot water pounding against my back is doing nothing to help the boner I am currently rocking. I can't tear my eyes off the bubbles dripping down Lacey's naked body, the pink buds of her nipples pretty enough to draw.

The stiffness in her posture quickly snaps me back to reality. Making a hasty retreat, I'm about to crank the water temperature to cold when Lacey reaches out and stops me.

"Don't go." Her fingers wrap around my arm and she tugs me closer.

The problem with being the same height is it means our bodies align perfectly. All it would take is one shift and I would slip right between her legs.

My dick throbs at the thought.

Lacey slides her hands around my neck and smiles. That's all she does and yet it feels like she just took my heart and ran it over with a freight train.

"Flower." I whisper, wishing I didn't feel so out of control, "I really want to kiss you right now."

"Then kiss me."

She doesn't have to tell me twice.

Leaning forward, I run my tongue along her bottom lip, licking off the water droplets before pressing my lips to hers. Her nails dig into my neck as she pulls me closer, the pointed end of my erection pressing into the soft tissue of her stomach.

She's so soft I can't stand it.

The wet slide of her tongue meets mine and a strangled sound escapes me. Shampoo runs down my back, the soapy texture coating Lacey's hands as she marks my body with her fingertips. It feels like she's lighting me on fire, the teasing dance of her purple fingernails igniting the fibres holding me together.

My hands weave into her wet hair, pulling her mouth closer so I can taste every inch of it. She bites down on my bottom lip and my hips jut forward, thrusting without my consent.

I pull away to apologize, but Lacey is already sliding her soapy hand between us and squeezing me gently. My brain stops working as her hand slides up and down my shaft, learning everything there is to know about the most irrational part of my body.

"Can you show me what you like?"

Lacey looks at me from under wet lashes and my legs almost give out from beneath me. Her green eyes are glowing against rosy cheeks, her naked body flushed with heat marks and the lingering trails of shampoo.

She's a living, breathing masterpiece. A breathtaking combination of darkness and kindness that I will never find in one perfect person again.

"Yeah."

Swallowing hard, I reach down and wrap my hand around hers, guiding her hand back up and twisting at the top. A groan slips out when Lacey's fingers brush the sensitive underside of my tip, her grip tightening as we work to get me off.

I bury my face in her neck as the pace picks up, keeping my free hand pressed against the wall to keep us from slipping on the wet tiles. My balls are tightening with a pending orgasm, but I'm not the only one breathing heavily .

Lacey's erect nipples rub against my chest on every inhale and the noises she's making are enough to convince me she's as turned on as I am.

I thrust into her grip, letting her take the lead as my hand trails down to the dark triangle between her legs. Water is the world's worst lubricant, but that doesn't stop me from feeling the slickness coating her upper thighs.

She's fucking soaked.

The realization has me coming faster than I would have liked, my hips thrusting feverishly as her hand continues to pump. My whole body shudders as the orgasm hits, my come shooting out to coat the soft skin of her stomach.

I'm expecting her to shriek and pull away, but all she does is pull me close. I can feel the sticky residue between us, but it doesn't take away from the feeling of being held.

From the feeling of being seen.

I close my eyes against her damp skin, breathing in the floral scent of the leftover shampoo. It takes a while for me to catch my breath, but it's worth it to see the smile waiting for me.

"How were my shower skills?"

She's looking at me with those playful eyes and I can't look away.

"Excellent. Would come back again."

"Glad to be of service."

She's still smiling when I take her hand and pull her under the stream of water. Gently washing her stomach clean of my seed, I let my fingers drift up and brush the hard peaks of her nipples .

Her breath catches, "We should probably get out. There will be no more hot water soon."

"We will. There's just one more thing I want to do."

Lacey arches her back in response to my touch, pressing her small breasts into my hands. I toy with the pink buds before sinking to my knees.

She looks down at me with a frown, "You just ate me out half an hour ago."

"I sure did. Can you open for me?"

By the time I have Lacey's leg thrown over my shoulder, she's gripping my hair and letting out quiet moans that has a smile spreading across my face. My flower deserves to be worshipped every minute of every day, without exception.

And maybe I deserve to be the one who gives it to her.

"Harder baby! Hit me harder."

The shout of ecstasy has me blinking as I open my eyes. An unfamiliar ceiling stares back at me, the warmth of Lacey's body pressing against my right side.

An exaggerated moan fills the room and a smothered giggle hits my ear. Rolling over, I turn and see Lacey covering her mouth with her hand. Her laughing eyes meet mine just as a loud smack echoes through the wall beside us.

I had heard Taber University's residence buildings were on the cheaper side, but this really puts things into perspective .

Another smack sounds through the wall and I wince.

"Sounds like it's going well."

Lacey bursts out laughing, "I should have warned you. Sunday mornings are louder than most."

"This happens more than once a week?"

"Yeah. I tried wearing earplugs at the start of the semester but they were too uncomfortable. It's mostly background noise for me by this point."

Loud grunts start up on the other side of the wall and Lacey blushes, "Well, not all of it is background noise."

We fall silent, staring at each other while the sex marathon continues one wall over. Lacey's face is flushed and sleepy and it's easily the prettiest thing I have ever seen.

Reaching out, I touch the freckles lining her nose, lightly connecting them all with my fingers. She scrunches her nose, trying to impair my progress, but I manage to sneak past the crinkles and mark every brown dot.

Lacey shifts closer, sliding her leg between mine and bringing our bodies that much closer. I savour the sensation of having her skin pressed against mine, knowing for a fact this is the only slice of heaven I will ever get to experience.

"Is that what sex normally sounds like?" She frowns, "That may be a silly question."

"It's not a silly question. Every person has their own preferences, as do every couple, so it's hard to say. Some positions can be louder than others, and if you bring props like whips and stuff, that will also change things. "

Her eyes go wide, "Have you ever whipped someone?"

"No. I don't find pleasure through my partner's pain." I chew my lip, debating how much to share, "I've never been in a long-term relationship, so I haven't gotten the chance to branch out much."

Lacey mulls over my words, "Is there something you've been wanting to try?"

I fall silent, wondering how much is too much when talking about sex with a rape victim. There is no doubt in my mind that what her ex-boyfriend did was rape, but that makes it tricky to know what grey areas to avoid.

I want to help her grow but I don't want to scare her.

She nudges my shoulder, "Come on, Skylar. Share your dirty secrets with me."

Tearing my gaze from her face, I look down at the duvet covering our intertwined limbs. I can see the outline of Lacey's leg draped over mine and it looks too perfect to be real.

Before I can begin to doubt myself, I let the truth spill past my lips.

"I want to draw you naked on my bed. After we finish making love and the evidence is everywhere."

Lacey sucks in a breath and I flick my eyes back to her face, "And then I want to put ink on your body. Connect every freckle I can find and turn you into a living constellation that I can wish on every night."

She's staring at me with wide eyes and shame hits me immediately .

"Not that I'm expecting you to pose nude for me. It's just something I've been thinking about."

"So, your biggest kink is… wanting to draw me?"

I flinch at the pitiful description. I've read the romance books Lacey loves so much. I know exactly how short I fall from those standards.

"Yeah." Embarrassment heats my cheeks and I quickly look away.

"Skylar. Look at me."

Lacey waits until I meet her eyes before sliding a hand across my chest. The simple touch has my heart beating faster, the pathetic organ desperately trying to break through my rib cage to reach her fingers.

"Your passion for art is one of the things I love most about you. There's no need to hide it from me." Her face breaks into a grin, "Besides, it was really hot when you drew on me last time. My skin is yours to use anytime you want."

I swallow thickly, "You would let me draw on you?"

"Of course. My body can be your personal canvas."

I kiss her without thinking.

She gasps in surprise and I slip my tongue inside her mouth. I coax a gentle moan from her as she slides her fingers through my hair, tugging me as close as our clothed bodies can go.

My body can be your personal canvas.

The heartbreaking words echo through my mind as I lose myself in her, surrendering to the colour and warmth she's brought back into my life .

My flower. My lifeline.

Long legs wrap around my waist and soon I'm rolling on top of her. Lacey's nails scrape down my back as I press into her, savouring the soft whimpers disappearing from her mouth into my own.

"I really want to have sex with you." Lacey whispers against my lips, her voice breaking right at the end, "But I… I'm not ready. Not yet."

Pressing one last kiss against her lips, I gently untangle myself from the soft invitation of her body.

"You don't need to explain yourself, Flower. I will take anything you're willing to give and nothing more."

She searches my face, sad eyes looking for expectations that aren't there.

"I don't know how long it's going to take, Skylar."

My shoulder lifts in a shrug, "Ten months, ten years, it doesn't matter. I'm not going anywhere."

Her bottom lip starts to tremble and tears spill over. Gently kissing away each one, I wrap myself around her, trying to help her find the thing we both need the most.

To not feel alone.