Chapter Fourteen

FOR WE WALK BY FAITH , not by sight.

It's been two weeks, and every day has me battling against anxiety and despair. I haven't heard a single peep from Zahir, and even though there's this part of me that's saying I'm being a fool to keep waiting—-

How can I stop, dear God?

When I remember telling him he loves me—-

And asking me to trust my instinct and have faith in him—-

When I remember the look in his eyes while saying those things—-

And those eyes, God.

His beautiful golden eyes were begging me to wait for him.

So how can I not?

AN ENTIRE MONTH HAS passed.

And for the first time since seeing him in Paradijs—-

I find myself crying.

This is insane.

Because it's six in the morning, and just about every student is out either cheering or participating in the university's inaugural Run to be Heard charity marathon—-

So, so insane.

And here I am, crumpling in the middle of the track and just bawling my eyes out.

I miss you!

I love you!

So where are you?

My heart cries the words out over and over, but it's no longer enough.

I can feel people staring at me.

Whispering about me.

But I just don't care anymore, and that's why—-

"I miss you."

I find myself choking the words out.

"I love you."

To the point that I think I'm about to lose my mind.

"So where are you—-"

"I'm right here, habibti ."

Oh God.

I've officially lost my mind, but I'm just so, so much in pain that I can't even make myself care.

"I miss you," I sob out.

"I miss you, too."

"I love—-"

A mouth covers mine, and I let out a gasp.

"I love you, too," he whispers against my lips.

I don't care if I'm dreaming.

I just don't want this to end.

"Open your eyes, habibti ."

"I'm scared."

"You don't have to be. I'm real and I'm right here."

Oh God, please.

I slowly open my eyes.

And I start crying again.

Because God's answered my prayers.

"Z-Zahir."

He pulls me to his feet, and even though I know for sure now that we have everyone staring at me, and the best thing to do is to get off the track—-

I need to know, God.

I find myself beating his chest over and over.

"What took you so long?"

But I only end up crying harder with how he doesn't make a move to stop me.

"D-Do you know how hard—-"

"I know." He wipes the tears from my cheeks. "I know, habibti, and I'm more sorry than you will ever know."

"Then tell me—-" And I actually find myself kicking his shin, but he doesn't even flinch. "Tell me w-why—-"

"It is a long story—-"

"Then make it short!" I don't care if I sound like a brat right now. "I need to know—-"

Because I want to stop hurting.

"So tell me—-"

"Alright." He pulls out a handkerchief from his pocket while speaking, and I only realize what he means to do when he presses it to my nose. "Blow."

I start to shake my head, but Zahir only looks at me. "You want the truth? Blow. "

I glare at him even as I end up doing what he says.

I blow my nose, and then I shove his hand away as soon as I'm done. "Your turn," I snarl. "Tell me—-"

"The woman you met at Paradijs is the only daughter of El Diablo ."

"If that's supposed to mean something—-"

"Drug trade, human trafficking, and money laundering are just some of El Diablo's crimes."

Oh.

"But three years ago, he also made the mistake of attempting to start his own cartel in our kingdom."

OH.

"The only way to get close to him is if you join his gang...or be his prospective son-in-law."

Is this my punishment for acting like a brat earlier?

Because now that I know the truth, I'm starting to wonder if maybe I was better off not knowing the truth at all.

Zahir cups my face. "You don't have anything to worry about, habibti ."

"I'm not worried."

Because it's true.

What I am, however, is guilty of unreasonable jealousy, and when I think about the possibility of Zahir having to play another woman's lover yet again—-

"I take it back," I hear myself.

Because it turns out he's right after all.

"I am worried."

"And that is why I'm telling you there's no reason for you to feel that way."

I think I need a little help, God.

How do I tell Zahir that it's not his life I'm worried about but the prospect of another woman stealing him away from me?

I have full confidence in his ability to protect himself, but just remembering the sight of Zahir's arm around someone else's waist is enough to make me feel like puking.

There's no way—-

"Prince Khal considers all marriage vows sacred. The only reason I was assigned to handle the Black Dove was because I had not met you then."

Oh, thank God.

"Do you have any more questions?"

"I do, actually."

"What is it?"

"Were you telling me the truth when you said we're already married—-"

"Yes."

A smile breaks over my lips, and he stares at me as if I'm the sun, moon, and stars in his world.

"Oh, Zahir."

It seems so impossible for a man like him to fall for me, but since I haven't had breakfast yet—-

"Will you please make me your wife?"

Five more to go then, and oh!

A helpless laugh escapes me as he springs into action at my words, and the people around us actually cheer as they watch Zahir toss me over his shoulder like I'm a sack of goods to be delivered, a.s.a.p.

His driver is quick to open the backseat door when he sees us coming, and I don't even have time to blush as Zahir wastes no time in getting me inside.

He's already pulled me into his lap before the door slams close, and I cup his face and look into his eyes so that he knows how serious I am.

"Don't make me wait."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes—-"

It's all I manage to say with Zahir already covering my mouth with his, and oh, finally.

His tongue thrusts inside my mouth, and all I can do is moan at the familiar sweetness of it.

"I love you," he rasps out.

And I just die, hearing this.

"I love you, " I sob back.

And I want him more than ever.

I want him so, so much that I'm practically crying in frustration as I struggle with unzipping him.

Why. Is. This. So. Hard—-

Finally!

His cock springs out of his pants and all I can do is stare.

Is it normal for a man's member to be this—-

Aaaah!

Did Zahir just rip my track pants away—-

Aaaah!

And just like that, I'm naked on the waist down—-

"You are already wet for me," he groans.

My cheeks burn in embarrassment as he dips his fingers between my legs.

"Z-Zahir—-"

His gaze locks with mine as he starts thrusting his fingers in and out of me, and my hands curve helplessly over his shoulders.

"Ride me, habibti ."

The command makes me blush even more, but I still find myself obeying his command.

I'm riding his fingers, and aaah!

He's pushed both my shirt and bra up to my neck, and he's captured my nipple with his mouth.

My head falls back as he starts suckling.

So good.

So, so good.

That I think I'm about to—- no!

I moan in protest when he yanks his fingers out, but when he pulls my hips back down, it's his throbbing length that finally, slowly, and steadily sinks inside of me.

Aaaaah.

A flash of pain, almost like a sting, is all I feel as something inside of me gives way to his thrust.

I'm still a virgin?

Questions burst into my mind, but they instantly fade at the way Zahir is now moving inside of me.

Aaaaaaah.

He's thrusting faster and faster.

Pounding harder and harder.

And reaching deeper and deeper.

That by the time he reaches between our bodies and starts rubbing his thumb against my clit—-

"Zahir."

All I can do is sob his name out as I start to come, and my husband is right behind me as he thrusts into me one last time and fills my insides with his seed.

"I love you," he whispers into my ear.

Oh no.

Three little words, and as impossible as it may seem—-

Life has become crazy wonderful with my sheikh, and just like that I'm coming again.

Just coming and coming and coming.