21. Zara

The chill of the air startled me awake.

Where was I?

Right. The dragon house. Where was Tarek though? I rolled out of the nest that we seemed to have made out of the bed, and it was then that my stomach growled. Right. I'd done a whole lot of stuff and none of it had been eating.

"Tarek?" He didn't answer as I walked into the empty bathroom. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and cringed. Maybe a quick shower was a good choice before I scoured the house.

I turned on the water in what I thought was an oversized shower before realizing just how big the intended inhabitant was. Now it almost seemed colossal without him.

The way the warm water hit my aching muscle though, had me forgetting the need for anyone else at the moment. I stood there, letting it run over my body, surprised when the water ran cold. Forcing myself to get out, I reached for the dragon-man-sized towel and headed to grab something simple. Plenty of clothing had been delivered even after I'd run away the other day. The gowns aside, most of the styles that had been delivered for me weren't too complicated. I was going to have to embrace that everything was more like tropical vacation clothing though. Still, I reached for a dress that was what I'd guess was an empire waist.

It fell around my ankles when I got it on and tied the ribbon belt. Long slits cut into the sides of the gathered skirt afforded plenty of movement. Movement for what? I didn't know. I winced from my sore muscles as I headed for the door.

Perhaps I would retract my earlier statement. I could embrace the comfort of this. It wasn't sweatpants, but it was pretty dang comfortable. I followed the stairs down to what was now becoming familiar. Voices were easy enough to follow around to what I thought was something like a living room. If a living room was formal and richly decorated.

"Dear, you're awake."

Tarek's mother jumped up from her seat where everyone had been talking.

"Thalassa, hi."

She took my hand and led me to an open loveseat.

"Mom, dear. Call me mom. We are so happy you're okay. Tarek was beside himself. He didn't want to leave, but matters must be addressed in our kingdom outside of these walls."

I hadn't actually seen much outside these walls.

"We aren't allowed outside the walls, right? Like we can't actually survive out there?"

Thalassa shrugged.

"They cannot," she said and pointed to the front of the house. "We can." And then she pointed at her and the others. She did not point at the three of us humans.

I shook my head.

"So many questions."

Aurora spoke up, and I hadn't even realized she was here.

"Remember, I said that without the mate bond, you cannot conceive and it also made sense that we cannot live outside the dome without it? Once you become a mated female, things will change, and then you will see the city."

I flopped onto the love seat.

"Not this city. The city outside this? Right. Okay."

Aurora smiled, and I wish I felt that kind of calm. Without Tarek, it was harder to ignore the confusion and panic that had become a part of me. I wasn't sure I remembered how to be calm.

"This is Pyroth, the dragon planet. Of course they had cities of their own. Ours is Drakonia, or rather that's the best translation of it. I wouldn't worry much about it. The goddess has designed it all to work as it should."

Right. As it should.

As it should. What did that even mean?

Shit. The room was really hot. I tried to fan myself without much relief. No one was looking at me for the moment. Someone else was asking a question. Probably one of the girls I'd trauma bonded with over this whole shit show.

As it should be.

"When will Tarek be back?"

I asked it so quietly the only person who heard was Tarek's mom, and I was thankful.

"He should be back soon. There is a phone in the other room that can reach the dragons if you would like. The clans all live in one giant intertwined series of buildings. I suppose it would be something like a hive perhaps, but we call it a hold. Someone will find him."

A phone? That would be very handy. I nodded blindly, trying to think through the panic attack threatening to take hold of me.

"Dear? Are you okay?" Thalassa asked me.

Loaded question.

I swallowed. If she had raised Tarek, and I was obviously trusting him with my sanity, I should trust her. How many times had I wished for my mom again? How many times had I prayed and prayed that I would find a new family that would love me and give me stability? It wasn't even love that I wanted. I just wanted to belong. I wanted the fear of being left behind to go away.

But the idea that this dome separated me from the one person that could calm my internal storm made me feel trapped.

I stood up and tried getting out of the house as quickly as possible. There were doors that went to what I had to assume was a balcony or patio or backyard, and that seemed like a good idea.

Light footsteps followed me, but it didn't really seem like that mattered. I'd been fixing myself by myself for a while now. Depending on someone else? Tarek had been a stretch, that was for certain. I got out of the house without any other obstacles.

The suns did cast a strange sort of natural light out on the stone terrace. I laughed. Two suns. Right. Two. Got it.

"Zara, please. Let me help you. I can't imagine what you are going through. Really. Are you okay?"

Pacing had a way of calming my ass down, so I did that. I also threw my hands in the air like the nervous energy was going to escape if I could just move.

"No. I'm not really okay. I have anxiety and depression and, well, my medication never got abducted with me. It wasn't like the alien assholes gave me an option to pack. So here I am without medication on another planet and none of that even makes sense."

Back and forth my feet carried me. Over and over. Damn it, I was a mess.

"Thalassa, I'm sorry." I stopped in front of where she stood. Instead of her making fun of me or telling me I was being ridiculous or, my favorite, to just take a deep breath, she reached for me. There was a pause, and I didn't know what to think.

"Is it okay if I hug you?"

A hug?

"I… Yes?"

Maybe her face was young and she was aging beautifully. Her eyes said she'd seen a lifetime of everything. There was no judgment. I stepped into her open arms and let her hold me.

It wasn't Tarek, but it was something. It was a mother. Her hand rubbed up and down my back like she honestly cared, and I think she probably did. I'd stopped trusting my inner voice long ago when it told me my sister would pull through. But right now? I didn't think that these people knew how to fake anything.

"Why don't I go get Tarek's father, and we go for a walk?"

A walk. I found myself nodding, looking for the words. Or better yet, trying to swallow back an emotion I'd really thought was dead. Relief?

"Yes. I'd like a walk." What I didn't say was that it should be weird to be taking a walk with two strangers whose son thought I was his fated mate. That bit though? I was actually starting to think it might be a thing. My heart skipped just thinking of the man.

And that is what allowed me to let the smile I'd been hiding from myself for far too long show.

I could actually find happiness here. I could find a family.