Prologue

She shouldn't be doing this. This was a horrible idea.

"Hey!" Marigold Clemons yelled in Prime. "Stop right there!" Apparently, she was doing this. "Back away from the Tylon!"

The Pilfers, an insectoid race, stared at her with the lack of respect probably due an Earthen woman facing a Pilfer swarm. It was difficult to look menacing with what she had going on.

Mari searched around her. Aha! She grabbed a broken piece of wood, which, ew, already had blood on the tip.

Finding a used murder weapon in a Bogartan alley was probably not unusual. The port on the saltland planet had a rough reputation. Everything in town had most likely been used to kill at some point. Bogarta was that sort of place.

Was that hair? The stick's globby end had hair and blood. Gross.

It was fine.

Totally fine.

Mari was a badass. She could wield this makeshift bat that someone else had previously used to bludgeon a hairy thing to death with. It was…broken-in. That was the way to think about it.

The Pilfers were obviously underwhelmed with her threat level, despite her hairy bloody stick. They stood there, staring, with a "seriously?" vibe.

Yes. Seriously. She was here to kick ass and take names—well, to kick ass anyway. Pilfer names were unpronounceable.

But it was all good. It was fine. She had this.

"It is fine," the Tylon called out, echoing her thoughts. Exactly. They had this. "It is best that you do not help." Fairly brave words from a highly-sentient plant lifeform. It had no arms or legs and just rolled its leafy self around. Basically, this Tylon was a buffet on the run for the gathered Pilfers.

No. Not today. Tylons deserved to live out their weird little lives in the universe, unassaulted by Pilfers.

"You don't understand, I'm a xenobotanist." Mari had studied for this—saving plant life. Admittedly, this exact scenario was on the extreme end. "If I don't stop this, I could never live with myself. I'll have regrets. I try not to live with regrets."

"Overall, it is better to live than not," the leafy Tylon said pragmatically.

Fair point.

"Nope. I'm doing this. I'm inexplicably doing this." She could also use the element of surprise as a weapon. "Ahhhhhhhh!" Mari ran at them while waving her pre-used stick menacingly.

"Ahhhhhhhh!" the Tylon yelled too, for some reason.

The Pilfer that was holding the swarm's leafy captive tossed aside the Tylon. The entire swarm turned to face her, hissing together. Even if they were only as high as her shoulder, they were mean as hells. They looked like a bipedal and a praying mantis had hooked up in an unnatural union and made babies.

Mari slammed her used stick into one of their grubby, nasty thoraxes. "Take that, you…you…you creepy ugly smagpiles!"

The Pilfer hissed and swung a sharp appendage, which she miraculously dodged. Shifting sideways, she kicked a Pilfer, using this awesome side-kick, which probably looked amazing. Mari would never manage that move again with such grace if there was an audience. Alas. Mari spun, slamming her stick into another one's thorax. "Eat my pointy stick, you blight on the universe!"

The Pilfer flew against the wall of the alley. Good. Excellent. Nicely done.

"Behind you!" the Tylon shouted.

Mari whirled around, swinging the stick.

Instead of her rudimentary bat colliding with an insectoid head, as planned, the Pilfer caught the stick in its pincers and wrenched the weapon from her hands.

"Oh shit," Mari said. Not good.

"Here, kick it again." The Tylon had rolled behind the Pilfer.

Excellent. She kicked the insectoid creep who'd stolen her stick. The bug-person tripped over the Tylon and fell on its back. Mari leapt forward, grabbed the stick from its pincers, and kicked her fallen enemy in the side. "Take that!"

"Yeah! Kick it when it's down! Yeah!" the plant person said.

She did. And, she enjoyed it.

Mari moved to guard the Tylon while brandishing the stick as the eighteen remaining Pilfers approached. Kicking was way more effective than she would have guessed. The two she'd kicked were still down, but the remainder were pissed as hells—no two ways about that. Plus, she and the Tylon were trapped against the alley wall. Hells.

"It has been good fighting alongside you." The Tylon tilted, looking up at her.

"This is fine." She blew a strand of hair from her face. "We'll be fine."

"We are cornered in a Bogartan alley, and it's eighteen against two."

"Yes, but I have a bloody stick and a whole lot of righteous rage. Plus, a xenobotanist against bugs? I got this."

"I commend your enthusiasm. You are more vicious than most Earthens."

"Damn right, I am." She waved her stick around. "You hear that, bugs? I am here to kick ass and drink ko'seft, and I'll get to the ko'seft later, if I have time." She glanced at her databand. Dammit. "I'm due back on the ship." She tucked the stick into her shoulder like a bat. "Okay, I'm just here to kick ass. Who's next?"

The Pilfers made a disturbing snickering noise and advanced.

They had this.

Really.

She swung her stick.

The Pilfers jumped out of reach. They made that noise again.

Mari bit her lower lip. Their snickering was unnerving. "It sounds like they're laughing."

"They are," the roly plant-dude said.

"Awesome." Think of a plan, Mari. You do not want to die in a Bogartan alley—that's fairly cliché for Earthens here.

Beyond the Pilfer swarm, a speeding figure ran at them, roaring.

What the hells?

Mari gripped her used stick tighter. Before the swarm could react to this new threat, a Pilfer in the back was yanked off its feet and thrown into the wall.

"Excellent," the Tylon said.

A Gaiian had arrived. He was hot, and he was on their side. The hot Gaiian lifted a Pilfer above his head and smashed it into the wall. Whoa. He was strong too. Damn. Now, they had a posse. They might not die.

Mari shook off her daze and swung her stick at another Pilfer. It connected, pushing that bastard back. She kicked one preparing to ambush their rescuer. Not today, bug-face! Not today! Hah! Kicking worked amazingly well. It worked better than her bloody stick.

A Pilfer dove for the plant-dude, but Mari kicked that bug-creep too. "Take that!" She'd worn her ass-kicking boots today. Mari picked up her new leafy friend, clutching the Tylon to her chest, and kicked several Pilfers. They were focusing their primary effort on overwhelming the massive Gaiian who'd come to help.

Her rescuer fought with a graceful fluidity, which was impressive, given he was a muscular, enormous guy. A pale scar zig-zagged one side of his face, which attested that this was not his first fight. Hells, he was Gaiian, so this was probably his one-billionth fight. He might go directly from this skirmish to another battle. It was the Gaiian way. Gaiians ran Bogarta with an iron-fist, and their clans didn't suffer fools.

The Gaiian punched a Pilfer and threw another, all while yelling in Gaiian. Whatever he was saying—it was hella profane. She didn't speak a lick of Gaiian, and she could tell he was laying down some real insults.

Mari kicked a large Pilfer. "Take that, insect scum!" Mari kicked it again. "Not so damn snickery now, are you, bug bastard?"

"I have this," the Gaiian said over his shoulder. "Go!"

Mari took stock of "the battleground." Ten Pilfers were still attacking. That was a lot of Pilfers. She kicked another one.

The Pilfer, obviously not a fan of being kicked, whirled around, enraged, and hissed, while swinging a sharp appendage toward her.

Shit! Should she throw the Tylon aside, so she could defend herself? That felt wrong.

Mari danced backward, falling over the body of an unmoving Pilfer. Hells, the Pilfer was beside her feet. Dropping the stick, she huddled around the Tylon protectively.

A blade slashed through the air, and the Gaiian sliced off the Pilfer's appendage before it could connect with her.

The "arm" dropped beside her, oozing blackish blood.

"Go, fwennif!" the Gaiian said.

"Okay." She scrambled to her feet while clasping the Tylon against her chest. Mari ran through the Pilfers, dodging their attempts to capture her. At the end of the alley, she turned back. "Actually, it's Marigold Clemons. That's, um, my name."

The Gaiian had decided a sword was the way to go. He'd gained an edge on them…literally. He was hacking his way through the insectoids. He stopped to stare. "Marigold?"

She nodded. "Dr. Marigold Clemons. I'm a xenobotanist. Saving plant life is kind of my thing." Her name was not what he'd called her. "Fwennif" most likely meant "strange Earthen" in Gaiian. Though, why was she telling him this in the middle of a fight? Maybe she really was a "fwennif."

A near-smile kicked up the corner of his mouth, and he looked bemused. "Go!" he said again and returned to the fight.

"Okay, I'm going." She ran toward the port. Mari would find the enormous rock-race man and stand beside him while she figured out what to do about the Tylon. Tapping behind her ear, Mari commed her captain. "I'll be late returning to the ship. I need to find a safe place for a Tylon I just saved in a fight."

"A Tylon?"her captain repeated. "Isn't that basically a talking cabbage?"

Mari considered the lifeform cradled in her arms. "Basically." It was what it was. She was a badass xenobotanist, who saved talking cabbages, with a little help from a really hot Gaiian. She exhaled in a huff. Not bad for her first fight in a Bogartan alley. Not bad at all.