Chapter 5

Five

R oman wished he could have avoided visiting his mother and gone straight to London. Her ramblings and reprimands had both been tedious and frustrating. She had seemed happy to see him, but he didn't think it was for his sake. His mother was practical and knew having one of her sons still alive was to her benefit. If one of his cousins inherited the title, she might not be so well off. As the mother of the earl, she was held in much higher regard in society. The Dowager Countess of Kendal enjoyed her prominent position in society, one solidified after her husband's death, and intended to maintain it. She didn't have to be a wife, but had all the benefits that allowed it.

It had been an exercise in futility. He listened to her berate him for his absence while in the same breath, asking when he would leave again. She also intended to go to London for the season and hoped she would see him there. Roman didn't actually believe she wanted him to have attend anything regarding the season, but she probably did hope he would marry and secure an heir for the earldom. Not because she had any hope of having grandchildren, but because she would so hate to fall into a state of destitution, or something she'd consider akin to beggary.

He was happy to be away from her loving company. It had left him feeling cold, and he had a deep need for warmth again. Which was why he found himself at the townhouse of the Earl of Harwood's London townhouse. There were so many people there to attend the debut ball for the twins. He had to wonder if all of the guests actually received an invitation. No one seemed to have been turned away, that was certain. It surprised Roman to discover that he had an invitation. Had Athena ensured he would have one? When had the invitations actually been sent?

Roman wanted to believe she wished for him to attend. He wanted to see her again. It had been a very long while since he had seen her. All right it had been a little more than a fortnight, but it seemed far longer. He glanced toward the two gentlemen who had agreed to attend with him. "Are you prepared for this?" The carriage almost seemed too small for all three of them. None of them were small in stature.

They were all eligible to the ladies searching for a husband, but the duke would garner the most attention. He pinned Roman with a glare. "I would rather go with Pemberton to one of his favorite brothels," Thornridge drawled

"So would I," the viscount added in a jovial tone. "I can definitely suggest a few more pleasurable choices. Why are we here again?"

"To watch Kendal act the fool," Thornridge drawled. "I told him he should stay away from this family, but he's determined to ruin himself with this pursuit."

"The chit cannot be as terrible as you're suggesting," Pemberton said. "I heard they're all beauties."

Thornridge was silent for a few moments, then said in a tone so quiet Roman almost missed what he'd said, "No one lady is more beautiful than Isla." He cleared his throat. "They're all beautiful. That is their allure, but you will regret being in their company."

Roman wanted to ask questions, but he held them back. He didn't think Thornridge would discuss what had happened. He clearly had feelings for Athena's sister, but he didn't know how deep they went. Had Isla broken his heart or was it much worse than that… Had Thornridge been his own undoing and ensured he would forever have a hole in his life because he'd done what he should instead of what he desired. Roman would not follow that path. He'd been the dutiful son and went down the expected path already. That had not gotten him anything but pain. He wanted happiness, and that meant claiming the only woman he had ever wanted in his life.

"You're wrong," Roman said. "Some things are worth every risk. She is important to me. If that is too much for you, then perhaps you and Pemberton should go to a brothel and leave me here."

The duke shook his head. "This is where we will be. You may need us."

"Then keep your opinions to yourself. Some things are better left unsaid." Roman frowned. "And do try to enjoy yourself. It is a ball. They're supposed to be amusing."

"Blasphemy," Pemberton mumbled. "Societal events are never as entertaining as the wicked variety." His green eyes twinkled with mischief. "Though I suppose with the right lady, a ball could be more wicked than even the most decadent house of sin. I'll see what I can manage at this one."

Roman closed his eyes and prayed. Pemberton would do whatever he pleased. He always did. "Do try to be discreet," he told the viscount.

"I'm always the very picture of discretion," Pemberton scoffed. "Ladies love me. They cannot help themselves."

"You should," Thornridge said. "I do not understand how you have not been trapped into marriage yet."

"Because of that very discretion I mentioned before," Pemberton said. "That and I do not bed innocents. That's a sure way to end up with a knot tying me to one woman for the rest of my days." He shuddered. "That's a fate I'd like to avoid for as long as possible."

The carriage came to a stop at the entrance finally. It seemed as though the carriage ride would never end. They each stepped out of the carriage and headed up the steps leading to the townhouse. It didn't take that long to reach the ballroom. They were each announced, but no one truly paid any attention. At least not that he noticed… There were far too many guests attending for anyone to be observant of the room as a whole.

Roman wanted to see one woman. He tried to find her but was failing.

"Is this the ball of the season?" Pemberton asked. "I didn't know the debut of two young ladies would be such a draw."

"It's not simply two young ladies," Thornridge said. "It's these specific young ladies, and the identity of their mother or more specifically the family she derived from."

"What do you mean?" Roman frowned. Thornridge had not been forthcoming with information. He had just warned him to stay away, but gave no real reason for the censure. "What family?

The duke opened his mouth, but then closed it and shook his head. It seemed as if Roman would not get the answers he craved. "Have it your way," Roman told him. "I'll find out either way."

He left Thornridge and Pemberton together and went in search of the woman he'd come to the ball for, and it didn't take too long for him to find her. She was on the edge of the ballroom, surrounded by gentlemen. Her dark green dress was exquisite and made her a beacon in a sea of dresses. Roman moved toward her and when he reached the circle surrounding her, she glanced up. Her smile sent warmth through him. That's what he had been missing. Her. Only Her.

Roman held out his hand. "Dance with me," he said. It should have been a question, but he it hadn't come out that way. He should have asked to see her dance card. What if someone else was supposed to lead her on to the floor?

She grinned and placed her hand in his. "I saved this one just for you."

He didn't know if that was true, and he scarcely cared. He led her to the floor and almost laughed when he realized what music was being played. It was a waltz. Thank God. Something was finally going right in his life.

Roman ignored the pain in his leg. It was worth it to have her in his arms. She fit in his arms as if she was made for him alone. "You're beautiful," he told her. "I missed you."

Perhaps he was saying all the wrong things. He shouldn't rush forward as if she was already his, even though in his mind she had always belonged to him. She had a choice, and he had to respect it.

"I missed you too," she said. "I'm glad you're here."

She was perfect, and to him, she always would be. His future lay with her. He twirled her around the floor, and as the strands of the waltz floated over them, everyone else disappeared. For those moments, it seemed as if the world disappeared and left them alone, with nothing standing in their way. "Can I call on you?"

"Always," she answered immediately. "You must meet my sisters."

"I would like that," he said in a reverent tone. He wanted to. Roman wanted to know everything about her. "I'm sure they're as lovely as you are."

Athena grinned, and that dimple in her left cheek drew his eyes. He wanted to kiss her there, and then give all of his attention to her lips. Later, once she agreed to be his wife, he'd kiss far more than that. Roman wanted to taste every inch of her and love her completely. He could wait, but he hoped he wouldn't have to keep his desires restrained for too long.

"Well," she began. "My twin does mostly look like me. I would understand if you think she's as beautiful as I am."

He frowned. "How can your twin not look completely like you?" Roman would know Athena anywhere. He hadn't even noticed another woman that might resemble her and could not imagine two of her.

"Our dimples are the only difference," she admitted. "If you're ever uncertain, our smiles will tell the truth every time."

"Your dimple." He glanced at her left cheek. "Is adorable. How is hers not like yours?"

"It's on her right cheek," Athena explained, then shrugged one shoulder as he led her around the floor. He didn't know how she had managed that. "It's like looking into my own reflection. A quirk of nature, I suppose."

He nodded. "I'll keep that in mind." Roman wanted to be alone with her. Even if it is only for a few moments. "Can we leave the ballroom?" Roman didn't know where to take her, as he wasn't familiar with the townhouse. He'd never been to the Earl of Harwood's residence. He'd been at war, and then convalescing for over a year. Roman hadn't had time to socialize.

"I would love that," Athena said, then glanced around the room. "Lead me over to the other side of the room. As the music ends, we can sneak out by the balcony doors. The garden has a maze in it. I'd love to show you."

Roman did as she suggested and then not long after that, they were outside on the balcony. There were several guests outside enjoying the cooler air the night sky offered. It had been quite hot inside the ballroom. She led him to a nearby stairway, and they headed down.

"How far is this maze?" he asked.

"Not much farther," she told him.

They were passing by a rosebush with buds just starting to form. He wished they had already been in bloom. Roman had the urge to pluck one and present it to her. Later, he would present her with dozens of roses. They reached the edge of the maze. "It's not elaborate," she explained. "But it is tricky if you're not familiar with it."

"Lead the way," he told her. "They were completely alone now, and they didn't need to enter the maze, but he wanted to ensure they wouldn't be interrupted."

He walked with her through the pathways until they reached the center. There was a fountain in the center. A simple one that trickled water from its spout surrounded by vines and flowers. "My mother had this made." She glanced at him. "My father said it was her wishing fountain. That if one hoped to hold on to love, they could throw something inside that has meaning to them and their wish would be granted." She turned toward the fountain. "It's silly and a lot of the ton would think it is witchcraft if it did work. Then we would truly be shunned."

Roman lifted his hand and placed his fingers on her chin, then lifted it so she would meet his gaze. "I don't need to make a wish for love," he told her. "And if anyone believes ill of you, then I'll ensure they never make you feel less than the wonderful woman you are."

"You're sweet," she said, and stepped out of his reach. "But you cannot control the ton. They'll never truly accept us."

"Does this have to do with your mother?" Thornridge had mentioned something earlier and he had to know the truth. He couldn't fight a battle without all the information. "Tell me about her."

Athena sighed. "I never knew her. She died when I was born." Athena turned away from him. "The rumors are that she was a witch. One of her ancestors had been accused of it in Salem, Massachusetts in the seventeenth century," she began. "He was acquitted, but the stigma stayed. It followed her from America back to England when she married my father."

He nodded. "And no one wants that to follow into their families. Then why is everyone here for your debut? What do they expect will happen?"

"They expect we'll fail," she said. "And they want to witness every agonizing moment of it. Isla fell in love during her first season, and he ended up spurning her. I don't know if I would survive a broken heart."

"That will not happen." Thornridge had made a mistake. He knew with certainty then that the duke had been the one to destroy the woman he loved. Why had he done it? That didn't matter in the end, though. Roman would not follow that same path. "You're my everything. Surely you understand that. I could no more stay away from you than I could quit breathing. You're my sunshine and without you, the world is a dark place. I need your warmth."

She inhaled sharply. "Don't disappoint me. Words can be easily spoken, but in the end they don't always equate to actions."

"You'll see," he promised. "I didn't survive a war only to lose in the end." Roman took a step toward her. She turned toward him and then with one more step, she was in his arms, then his lips were on hers. The kiss was more than a promise, it was a declaration. He would marry her. Even if he had to kidnap her and ride as fast as possible to Scotland to prove it to her. They belonged together.