Chapter 12

I staredout of the window, the vents open so I could hear the crashing of the waves on the stony shore. I felt better today, my mind sharper, the meds eased off, the pain honest and there, but not crippling, and the surgery site looking good. I was still weak and couldn’t get out of bed, but I had a long time to think about things.

Amos.

How had I allowed myself to be deceived by Amos for so long? I’d thought he was a pawn in a larger game, just this insignificant and fearful man, yet it turned out it had been him pulling the strings all along.

I couldn’t shake the vivid memory of that moment when Amos had shot me, the agony searing through my gut, and the ice-cold expression as he’d pulled the trigger.

He’d abducted Annie, or somehow inherited her, or bought her—I didn’t know—he’d masterminded orders to eliminate targets, manipulating events from behind the scenes. Though I lacked real evidence, I was convinced he was the one responsible for James’s death, and that Annie had been nothing but a lucky mistake for him. The pieces of the puzzle weren’t falling into place fast enough for me, and I was frustrated beyond belief.

The knock was enough of a surprise to shake me out of my mood, and I snapped upright. Fuck.

“Come in,” I said and tried to shift in the bed to sit upright. Whoever was coming through that door, they weren’t going to see pathetic August; they would be seeing a Navy SEAL who was capable of anything.

Fuck it hurts.

“Hi, August.”

Ethan—the one who knew more about how much of a killer I was than the others. He’d been right there when I’d put a bullet through the brain of his old FBI boss. Former Army Ranger, then FBI, quick with a gun, he crossed to the bed, another man close behind him frowning at me.

“Maybe you should wait some more,” the other man said. I recognized him—he’d been in my room before, fussing around me, making sure I was okay—Josh.

“We can’t wait,” Ethan said to Josh, as we gripped hands. “August.”

Josh huffed behind him, “Come on Ethan?—”

“What can’t wait?” I asked Ethan, even as Josh huffed at being interrupted. “Is this something about Amos? I’m ready to get out there,” I said and cursed when my body still wouldn’t freaking move.

“Worse than kids,” Josh muttered.

Josh didn’t have a military look to him. Yes, he was determined, and he’d come barreling in after Ethan, but he seemed more concerned than anything else.

Ethan gripped the other man’s arms, then tugged him in for a soft kiss and a longer hug. “I promise, we won’t hurt him.”

Ah, so Josh and Ethan were a thing. A very sexy kissing thing.

Josh disentangled himself. “Don’t think that kissing me will stop me worrying,” he snapped, although there was a hint of a smile on the part of his face I could see. “You have a call button, these idiots make you worse, you use it, okay?”

I blinked at the man. “Sure.” I still wasn’t sure who Josh meant by these idiots when it was him and Ethan.

Then, someone else knocked on the doorjamb, and when I inclined my head that he could come in, he was only one of six other people headed into the room, the last of whom—Ryder—shut the door.

Ethan cleared his throat as I took in the sheer amount of badass in this room with me.

“So, short introduction. Zach, SEAL.” I glanced at him, didn’t know him, but just because we’d both been Navy, both SEALs, didn’t mean we were buddies. He looked kind of familiar, but he didn’t give any indication he recognized me. We just exchanged nods because in the heart of us, we might not know each other, but we were brothers by the teams we’d been on.

“Yaz, Aria, Special Operations.” I wasn’t close enough to anyone to shake hands, but we exchanged nods. “Kai, 427 Special Operations Aviation Squadron. You know Ryder, and this is Luca, he’s the one who got Annie out.”

I wanted to shake Luca’s hand, and he seemed to get the message, leaning toward me. I gripped his hand hard. Ryder might well have gone back inside with me to clear the compound, but Luca had saved Annie.

“I owe you. Same as I owe Ryder.”

“It was nothing,” Luca said with a nod, his blond hair falling over his left eye, and offered me a wide grin.

“So, introductions over, August,” Ethan said in a calm, but businesslike, tone. “I’ve got some updates on the case. You feeling up to it?” He didn’t add that if I wasn’t up to it, they’d all leave. It was a moot point—I wanted to talk about this case, and this crew of Ethan’s were the team that would take me to Amos. I was sure of it. Everyone settled in—Zach and Kai leaned against the wall; Ryder dragged over the chair, and when he sat, Aria perched on the arm. Yaz sat at the end of my bed, and Ethan paced.

Only, my gaze kept landing on Aria who was, for sure, leaning on Ryder.

What the hell is that churning in my gut?

Jealousy? At what? The woman’s familiarity? Fuck’s sake.

I tried not to look at Ryder, but when I cast a quick glance at him, still with Aria leaning on him, I found his unwavering gaze locking with mine.

“Go for it,” I replied, trying to sound more confident than I felt, determined not to let my injuries sideline me from whatever was happening here.

“How long were you undercover with the Cooper River crews?” Ethan asked.

That confused me—surely they already know all this shit? “Isn’t that in your file on me?”

Ethan glanced at his team. “They don’t because it was a need-to-know basis,” he explained, and I guess I was grateful not everyone in this room knew everything I’d done.

“Eighteen months, give or take.” Stick to the facts. “Got a solid persona, called in some favors, started with the supply side, but things escalated fast. Ended up having a whole portfolio with the trafficking operation, reporting to Amos who, at the time, I believed was reporting higher. Then, you showed up with your Sanctuary Foundation.” I pointed at Ethan. “Really put a fox among the chickens. I took my chance, we managed to divert the kids from harm’s way, and I could pass on everything I knew to you and to Sanctuary which is where I guess you all work?”

“Not exactly. We’re Shadow Team; autonomous but funded by Sanctuary.” He tipped his chin at that, as if he was daring me to comment. I didn’t give a shit what they called themselves, if they were like Ryder and Luca, and brave like Ethan when he’d faced down my gun, then I was in their hands and happy for it.

Ethan handed over the tablet. “For you.”

I tipped the screen toward me, balancing it on one knee I drew up, the cannula in the back of my hand pinching. Ryder was at my side in an instant, untwisting the IV and sitting down again before I could even register what he’d done.

The screen had a photo of Amos front and center, and I had to breathe through the immediate anger spiking inside me. He’d played me for a fool, and worse, I’d fallen for his act.

“What do you know about him?”

I closed my eyes for a moment. “Absolutely nothing. As far as I was concerned, he was the go-between, the one filtering the orders, scared of his own freaking shadow. Jesus, this is some Kaiser S?ze shit…”

“We’re still working on ID, but even to the best of us, he’s a ghost.”

“I know he had…” I blinked, then shut my eyes again, picturing Amos even as bile rose inside me. “A cap, a sports logo, I want to say a snarling wolf. I never paid much attention, and it wasn’t one I recognized. The logo was shield shaped with pointed edges, gray, black, and red. There was lettering, but it was faded. He hid behind the brim sometimes; fuck, that was part of the act.”

Ethan nodded to Aria who was tapping away at her own tablet.

“On it, boss,” she muttered, and even though I expected some miracle where she instantly found the word, she frowned, and Ethan continued to talk.

Ethan leaned forward; his eyes focused on me. “What connected you to the Cooper River crews? Why them? Did you know they had Annie?”

“I had help, followed rumors. My team had my back, until they couldn’t anymore. James was working a Cooper River case, found links back to the acting DA; that was why we were called in.”

“Your SEAL team?” Ethan asked.

“No, I was private by then, but yeah, my SEAL team had my back if I needed them. They were sent overseas, last I heard, two were dead, the rest disbanded and scattered, but not before they helped me when they could.”

“So, you found out they’d taken Annie and infiltrated the cartel to track her down?”

“Sure, let’s go with that,” I hedged. Getting me into the cartel had been way more convoluted, and I owed my former team everything, but yeah, I’d become a trusted crew member for the Cooper River Cartel to track Annie down, imagining a rescue, and instead realizing she was nowhere to be found, and I was deep in a nest of vipers.

“How did you manage to gain the trust of the traffickers and cartel members? That’s no easy feat.”

I took a deep breath before responding. “I played the long game, slowly proving my loyalty and dedication. I took on riskier roles within the organization, which earned me their trust over time. They saw me as one of their own.”

“What kind of information were you able to gather about operations? Anything else that can help us? Any allies or contacts within the criminal organization that helped you along the way.”

“No. I was on my own. Did what I had to do, kept my head down. Until you decided to turn up.”

Ethan nodded. “Okay.”

“What about tying Amos to James Lerner’s death?” I asked, my heart heavy as stone. Ethan’s expression shifted enough for me to know he had intel. Grief was a tight knot in my chest, making it hard to breathe. My throat felt constricted, and my body tensed, as if bracing for an impact. “Tell me.”

“He ordered the hit, or at least, the hit was handed out by him as ordered from above.”

“And there was no above,” Ryder summarized.

I was numb, detached, staring at this as if I was an observer, as if that wasn’t my charge who Amos had killed.

“I will kill him,” I said, no emotion in my tone; it was a simple promise.

“If that is your intention, then you won’t play a part in his capture. The target will be handed to VCRS,” Ethan replied in the same tone.

“What? No, he doesn’t deserve any more time on this fucking earth,” I yelled. Pain knifed through my chest and belly, and I realized I’d moved too much, too fast. I knew the Violent Crime and Racketeering Section at the Justice Department was the official team of prosecutors who should be responsible for Amos and whatever dregs of Cooper River were out there.

But Amos was dying for what he’d done to people in my charge. To James and Max, and for taking Annie away.

Ryder came over and fussed around my pillow, as if he were trying to help, but when I met his level gaze, his brown eyes were filled with warning.

I opened my mouth to tell Ethan and his team that I didn’t give a shit about what they wanted, because when I had Amos, I’d kill him slowly for every hurt I’d seen.

For James.

For taking Annie.

For killing Max.

For the hundreds who’d died because of his trafficking, or weapons, or the drugs he distributed.

Ryder had seen me kill the crew members, and he hadn’t judged me for it, and hell, I assumed he understood the need to stop what I’d seen, but maybe he saw value in the law having their time with Amos?

Did I respect that?

I didn’t even know him. So, I said nothing.

“All intel we gather will end up on that screen for you, there’s financial records, photos, whatever we have, within reason. Our aim is to find Amos, and your insight is valuable. Consider yourself conscripted to Shadow Team as a resource.”

I could work with that—wanted to be kept in the loop.

“Daily briefings, hourly if you have more,” I insisted.

Ryder shot me a scowl, and I responded with my best nonchalant expression, making it clear I didn’t care what he thought about me being kept in the loop.

One by one, the team left, following Ethan out, until it was just Ryder, and it was clear he had something to say, given how he was hovering by the door. Even more obvious when he shut it and sat back down in the chair.

“What?” I snapped, belligerent, and so damn exhausted I couldn’t handle a lecture.

“We should talk?”

“No,” I said, then closed my eyes, then added, “fuck. “Fuck off, I’m tired.”

I couldn’t fight sleep, and the next time I woke, it was dark, and I assumed he’d left, but either he hadn’t left, or he’d come back.

Because he was in that damn chair, head tilted, his breathing deep and even as he slept.

Why wouldn’t the asshole leave me alone?