57. Zendaya

Chapter 57

Zendaya

A ll three Crows land in the courtyard. Four …

Aodhan has joined us. He touches two fingers to his forehead and flicks them in that same odd gesture Cathal did once. "You got it, boss bird."

At my frown, Cathal presses his palm to the small of my back and leans over to murmur, "I've tasked him with keeping Kanti entertained."

Reid coughs a word that's foreign to me into his fist, which makes Aodhan's grin burn brighter.

"Have you seen Kanti?" The Crow no one can seem to stand flicks back a lock of midnight hair. "It's not exactly a punishment."

"Gods, you and her are like the same person," Agrippina says.

I catch a soft smile playing on Aoife's lips. I take it that she agrees.

"I'll choose to take that as a compliment seeing as Kanti is hot as fuck." He waggles his eyebrows at Agrippina. "Admit that you're disappointed the Cauldron didn't mate you with me."

She bursts out laughing, which makes Reid grin smugly. I glance up at Cathal whose expression wavers between amusement and nerves. When he senses my stare, he wheedles the corners of his mouth up. I wish he didn't feel the need to fake anything with me.

Asha appears beside us, her eyes bright in spite of the dark circles rimming them. "I fed Cruaih before putting her in Daya's bedchamber like you asked, Cathal."

Oh, Mahananda, Cruaih! I'd completely forgotten about her.

"Thank you, Asha," Cathal says.

"Anytime. And I mean it, anytime . She and I have a bond."

Aodhan's eyebrows wiggle again. "What sort of bond?"

"I know you want him to distract Kanti," she murmurs to Cathal, "but any chance the two of them could distract each other in the Sky Kingdom?"

Cathal smirks. "Lorcan would turn me into a forever-Crow if I sent him back. Especially if I sent him with Kanti."

I hiss. Even though I understand he meant it as a joke, I don't like the mention of dying, not even in jest.

He slides his palm to my waist and gathers me against him, then places a soothing kiss against my temple.

"I heard that, Cathal," Aodhan says, with a tilt of his chin and a scowl that leads me to think his arrogance isn't entirely impermeable.

"If you stopped flirting with every woman in a one-mile radius—especially the mated ones"—Cathal's fingers crinkle the silver pleats of my dress—"Lorcan and I would hold you in higher esteem."

"Not my fault the ladies find me so irresistible."

"I hear Glace is lovely at this time of year," Asha says, which makes Cathal's lips curl.

"I prefer my dick not to turn into an icicle, thank you very much."

Asha sighs as though greatly aggrieved by his refusal to relocate. "I'll hold the fort down until Abrax gets back. Now off to bed, imNaage. And I do mean to sleep." She gives Cathal a pointed look that makes his fingers crimp my waist a little harder.

Since no one intimidates the male, I deduce that his sudden edginess comes from within.

"Reid and I are going to get some food. Should we send anything to your room, Daya?" Agrippina asks.

"No. Thank you." Right before slipping past Asha, I wind my arm around her shoulders and hug her tight. "You, too, need your sleep. It's been a long twenty-four hours."

She pats my back. "As soon as Abrax returns, Sumaca."

Right before I pull away, I remind her, "Day or Daya, or even imNaage, just never Sumaca."

She smiles, then with a wink, she says, "Fine. I'll only use your title when I'm mad at you."

I snort as Cathal tugs me away. "You're often mad at me."

Her smile grows. "By the way, I know you can bloodcast now, but I added a few wards around your wing that should last until sundown, even though I'll be back by then. Promise."

"She should be part of your Akwale," Cathal murmurs as he cracks open my door and crouches. I'm guessing he sensed Cruaih was waiting right behind it.

"She is. I asked her this morning. Along with Agrippina and Enzo," I say, closing my door. I reach up and push my finger against one of the two diamond tusks. When the skin tears, I bring my finger to the door and paint the sigil that will prevent anyone from bursting inside. "Tamar elected to retire—she may have stayed but I don't think she likes me very much." I try not to let her opinion affect me. "Asha's suggested two new Shabbin candidates. I asked her to bring them over in the morning."

As Cathal scratches Cruaih's neck, his throat works over a deep swallow. "Your Akwale will be formed in no time."

I suck on my fingertip as I study the crinkled corners of his eyes and the deep hollows beneath his bladed cheekbones. Does he think I'll send him home once I've assembled my government?

I walk over to him and seize his jaw, then angle his face toward mine. "Cathal Báeinach, I know Taytah ruled alone, but I don't want that. I want a king at my side. Forever at my side." My proposal's met with complete silence. "Please say yes."

"Old-Daya told me that I couldn't be king for I'd terrorize the Shabbins."

A jolt of anger swarms me, and I let go of his face. "Old-Daya isn't me."

Cathal's silent, probably lost in thought about this mate who apparently loved him but not enough to make him king. As I remove my dress and climb into bed, I hear water running in my bathing chamber. Is he thinking of her ? I wait and wait, and still he doesn't join me in bed. Does he plan on spending his entire night hiding from me?

Exhaustion collapses my lids before the Crow has joined me in bed. But when I wake, he's there, lying next to me, Cruaih curled up on his pillow. Though he said he wouldn't be sleeping while I did, he sleeps as soundly as his kitten. I watch as the sun crawls beneath my curtains and scratches over his form. Oddly enough, it's only once it reaches his face and dances over his jaw that I realize he's reduced his wild beard to a mere stubble.

He must sense me watching him because his lashes flutter and then his head turns. He sits up so suddenly that Cruaih lets out a little yelp. " Focá . I didn't mean to nod off."

"My chambers are warded."

"Still, I shouldn't have fucking passed out." He scrubs his eyes that are bare of their usual black stripes.

I wouldn't say the male seems younger without a beard and makeup, but he does look different—less terrifying. The thought carries me back to the last thing he said the night before. I decide not to let my jealousy encroach on my mood. "Have you thought about my proposal?"

He glances over his large shoulder at me. Though he removed his armor, he's fully clothed. I suppose he didn't want to risk guarding me in the nude. "I have."

"And?"

"You don't need to marry me to ensure I'll stay at your side. I promised I would." His Adam's apple rolls as he sketches the slope of my bare shoulder with his eyes. "I've no intention of breaking my promise to you. Any of my promises."

"I still want to marry you."

With a deep sigh, he lays back on the mattress and turns onto his side, his palm settling on my waist. "I know why you asked me to marry you, Daya. You think a marriage bond will comfort me if our bodies fail to knot."

I'm a little surprised he's guessed my underlying intent. Actually. No, I'm not. Cathal Báeinach knows me inside and out.

"Mo mila Sífair, I don't need a matching crown or blood magic to feel confident in your affection. Besides, I've never aspired to marry or to rule a kingdom. Do I worry you'll leave me? Yes. But that's because I lost you once."

"You lost a woman who looked like me. You didn't lose me ."

He bobs his head, his fingers walking up and down my ribcage.

"Please stop comparing me to her."

His fingers hold still.

"I can't explain why, but it makes me mad." I roll my lips together. "And jealous."

"Done." He starts caressing the edge of my body again.

Wanting to feel his skin on mine, I push down the sheets and nod to his clothes. "Off."

His lips quirk as he sits again and yanks off his shirt. And then he's climbing off the bed, kitten in hand.

I push up onto my forearms. "Where are you going?"

"I don't want to scar little Misery."

I frown until I hear a door click. "You put her outside?"

"In your closet. Her kibbles are there so she's plenty happy." He tugs on the laces of his leather pants. "If she becomes as large as a tendu, I will have words with Asha."

I smile, but then the smile trips off my lips because the male is bare, and I'm overwhelmed by another emotion, one that isn't humor.

His curved cock is so hard it juts out and bobs as he climbs back onto the bed. He settles beside me while I stare at him down there with a mixture of trepidation and anticipation. Mostly the latter.

"Tell me what to do," I ask.

"Wrap your hand around me."

I reach out and curl my fingers around him. His flesh is hot and silken like mine. Unlike mine, though, it pulses as though his heart dwells there.

"Why did you shave your beard?"

He slides one hand between my thighs. "So I don't irritate your delicate skin next time I go down on you."

"It didn't hurt."

"It was too red for my liking." He scrubs a hand across his jaw. "If you prefer me with a beard, I'll let it grow out again."

"You look handsome with it and without it. I've no preference." When my thumb grazes his engorged tip, it comes away damp.

Cathal's breath catches. "Actually. Change of plans, my Sweet Serpent," he says in rapid-fire Crow, shackling my wrist and tugging it away.

I quirk a brow. "Why? Was I doing it wrong?"

"Daya, you could jab your fingernail into my cock, and I'd still come. You could never do anything wrong."

"Then why are you pushing me away?"

"Because I want to last once I get inside of you." He sucks on his fingers and then reaches between my legs and slicks his saliva over me.

I don't know why he feels the need to dampen me considering how wet my core already is, but I don't ask, getting lost in the sensation he kindles. My heart begins to palpitate as eagerly as the rest of my body, which leads me to climax against his skilled fingers in no time.

"To think I'm going to get to do this every single fucking day of my life," he murmurs around a pleased smile.

As my body settles around the lazy strokes he now draws up and down my folds, he explains that it might hurt when he gets inside me, if the Mahananda revirginized me. At my quirked brow, he clarifies what that means. I suddenly hope that the Mahananda did revirginize me, so that it doesn't feel like a recycled body to Cathal.

I smooth a black curl off his forehead. And then I scoot closer, still on my side, and seal my mouth against his. His lips part mine, and then his tongue surges in and caresses. For a moment, his hand stops moving over me and he loses himself in our kiss, but then he begins to caress again, targeting that hole he plans on stretching.

When he dips his finger inside, my body gives an involuntary jerk that makes me click my teeth around his tongue, not hard enough to draw blood but hard enough to make me break the kiss and swing my gaze down our bodies to check that it was his hand and not his cock. And yes…it's his hand.

"Do you want me to stop?" he asks, worry scoring his features.

"No. Do it again."

His finger glides back in, a little farther this time. When I grit my teeth and clench around him, he sighs.

"What? Are you afraid my body won't fit yours?"

A corner of his mouth tugs up. "No."

"Then why did you sigh?"

"Because I'm worried that our first time will be uncomfortable for you."

Relief floods me and I expel an almost violent breath. One that turns a little choppy when Cathal starts strumming my clitoris, all the while spearing me with his finger, going deeper with every flick of his wrist.

Predictably, I start to rattle. There is no pain. At least, none I can feel over the pleasure coursing through my veins, propelling heat low in my belly. Though the male doesn't paint me with any sigils, I burn and shake. I seize his shoulder that pops with muscle and hold on as he thrusts and teases.

The pleasure that streaks through me is brighter, rougher, headier. It wrenches a scream from my lungs, one that's so shrill, I worry it'll fissure the ceiling tiles. I flop onto my back and just lay there, attempting to catch my breath as Cathal carries his hand to his face.

I think he's about to lick my juices off like he did last night, but instead he just studies his fingers. "What?" When I notice a smear of black on his middle finger, I prop myself onto my forearm, almost toppling against him. "Where did that blood come from?" I frown, sweeping the covers fully off myself, because?—

"When a woman's hymen tears, she bleeds." Twin spots of red bloom over his cheekbones. "Or so I've heard. I've never deflowered a virgin."

I'm inordinately glad to learn that this is going to be a first for him like it is for me. He wipes his finger down his muscled thigh, smearing my watery blood against the skin I once healed, which still bears a puckered scar, and then he flops onto his back. "Climb on top of me. I want you in control."

I kneel, wrinkling my nose at the gray mess on my pristine sheets, then carefully swing one leg over him, keeping my hips high. The head of his cock is puffed and shiny, pointed upward, in the direction it wants to go.

He braces his large, callused palms under my backside. "When you're ready, just guide me in."

His chest grows still when I curl my fingers around the veined flesh and brush him across my folds, moistening him some more. And then I hold him at my entrance and lock my stare with his. Cathal's eyes are dark with anticipation yet bright with an emotion that weaves itself around my ribs and swathes my heart.

"I love you," he says suddenly. Though he doesn't add, "Whatever happens next," I hear the words. Or maybe I make them up. Perhaps I'm the only one inherently worried about what's about to happen…or not happen.

I want to return his words to make sure he knows that I feel the same, but my throat is so tapered I can barely levy air. What little of it I manage to reel in escapes as I lower my hips and he breaches my walls. I stop when I reach my fingers that are strangling his poor, throbbing cock. Fearing I'm hurting him, I spring them wide. I gasp then, because we're both so slick that I'm in freefall. By the time Cathal realizes I don't mean to sheath him inside of me so precipitously, I've slammed all the way down to his root.

"Sorry. Focá . Are you all right?"

I swallow, trying to gather my wits. He wasn't jesting when he mentioned there might be a little discomfort.

"Príona?" His stomach muscles clench as he rolls up, changing the angle of his penetration. "Please say something."

"I'm"—I claw at his shoulders as though I were part tendu instead of part Serpent—"fine."

His lips twist. "Clearly." He begins to lift me, but I push back down.

"I'm fine," I all but growl.

"Tears are spilling out of your eyes. You're not fine ."

"I am," I grit out.

"It'll feel better next time."

"No."

"It will."

"I wasn't saying no to how it will feel. I'm saying I want to stay on your cock until you get your release." I want our bond to form.

"Because you think I could come knowing that I'm causing you pain?" He shakes his head, then thumbs my cheeks to clear away the dampness.

"At least try," I croak.

"No. Not this morning." He disengages himself from me but doesn't lift me off his lap. Instead, he winds his arms around me and holds me against him until the tears stop tripping past my lashes.

Stupid tears.

If only I hadn't wept like some injured creature.

If only he could've come immediately.

If only we could've known…