Chapter 12

Barbie

Irubbed my eyelids as the vampire prince strolled in, a big smile on his gorgeous face, aiming to disarm and charm me. The door shut automatically behind him to give us some privacy.

I didn't exactly need the privacy. I didn't understand why I must participate in this speed dating, but Killian had promised me moons for doing this and said it was the quickest way to get everyone off our backs and send the other heirs on their way.

I guessed I should show up eventually to thank the other princes for coming for me and rescuing me from that dungeon in CrimsonTide. I owed them a life debt, but right now, the best way to roll was to not acknowledge that debt.

Pucker, however, was beside himself to be a host. Sy perked up as well, and kept criticizing my looks and pose.

Thrust out your chest so the princes can admire your boobs,she advised. We don't hide our best asset.

How much effort could I put into it? I only had two tits!

I propped an elbow on the ridiculously large table, resting my chin on my palm, tapping my foot on the edge of the chair. Even the gown couldn't stop me from getting comfortable. This was going to be a long day.

I closed an eye to get some shuteye, since I'd stayed up late to finish a hockey sports romance book. My other eye peered at Louis. He wore a white designer shirt and tight leather pants. That shirt must be new, since I'd never seen him wear it when I was his squire.

Wait! Did I see a bulge in the front of his pants? I almost squinted or opened both eyes to give it a better look, but I resisted doing either. I lifted my gaze, not wanting to give him any satisfaction about the fact that I'd kind of checked him out. It'd been traumatizing enough to watch him star in live porn. But Sy ogled him for good measure and smacked her lips.

Aren't you with the fae prince?I asked.

I'm not dead, she said. Everyone looks. Rowan looks at other females too. He looks at you.

Whatever.

Louis grinned at me, heat lighting his pale blue eyes. He had his blond hair combed back like a hot Mafia boss. Dark Mafia romance was popular now, and I wondered how long the trend would last.

"Hello, Barbie," the vampire greeted me with a deep, sexy voice. "I'm glad?—"

Pucker chose this moment to pop out beside him, and Louis leapt back.

"What the fuck?" Louis yelped, and Pucker flickered in and out of view, flashing his brightest smile at the vamp prince. "What kind of fucking game is Killian playing?"

"Greetings, Prince Louis." Pucker bowed. "Welcome to the first date with Miss Barbie in our fantastic speed-dating show."

Louis looked at me then at Pucker again, narrowing his eyes in suspicion. Vampires were as paranoid as shifters.

"He's one of the two guardians of the House of Chaos," I explained in my husky voice while I shrugged. "He used to be Luther. Now he goes by Pucker."

Louis's scowl deepened. "The fucking poltergeist?"

"That's misinformation, or at least it's outdated." Pucker sighed. "I'm the host of the speed-dating show, and I'll be giving scores to all the princes, so you might want to take care not to curse in front of a lady, especially a virgin one. And FYI, you just used one minute of your five minutes of speed-date time."

"Fuck off!" Louis said, zooming over and landing in the chair across from me.

"Minus two points for the House of Vampires for offensive language," Pucker announced.

"Do you have to be here while I talk to Barbie? Well, don't answer!" Louis ordered him, remembering the time limit. The more he scolded the ghost, the more minutes would be taken away from the date.

Louis gave Pucker a threatening glance before turning to me, his expression shifting to a charming smile. I could see him fighting not to look at the veins on my neck. He might try to be a better vampire, but his fangs would slide out eventually.

"Pardon me, Prince Louis, but I do have to answer. And I have to be present," Pucker said dutifully. "As I said, I'm the host of the show."

Louis huffed rudely and shooed Pucker. The guardian looked crestfallen, no longer excited about making his dating show perfect.

I had to cheer him up a little.

"Be nice to Guardian Pucker, please, Sir Louis," I said. "It's tough to be dead, and Guardian Pucker has been doing an amazing job getting this show running so smoothly. If you aren't happy, sir, you should take it up with Sir Killian, but don't take it out on Guardian Pucker, who has shown us only kindness and professionalism."

Louis blinked, then shook his head. "You always have a soft spot for the underlings, which makes you stand out even more than the other candidates."

"It's not a competition," I said, "but I appreciate your understanding, sir."

"You're too polite, Barbie." Louis smiled at me encouragingly. "Does Killian treat you all right? You can always return to my h?—"

A tall glass of blood floated toward Louis and landed with a thud in front of him.

"Your drink, Highness," Pucker said, waving his phantom wand. "Courtesy of the house."

Louis lifted the glass and sniffed, his smile morphing to a snarl, his vampire fangs showing and glinting in the light. I leaned back in the chair.

"This is chicken blood. It isn't even fresh!" he growled. "Fuck Killian!"

I wrinkled my nose. It did smell bad.

"Another point taken from the House of Vampires for disrespect toward the heir of the host house," Pucker chimed in. "And you have three minutes left, Prince Louis."

Louis shoved down his temper and pushed the glass of chicken blood away from him. I could see that he put in great effort not to hurl the glass of blood at Pucker or the wall.

He retracted his fangs and smiled at me to show how harmless he was, but a gentleman vampire didn't fit in with his brand. I had intimate experience with his fangs when they broke my skin and pierced the veins in my neck.

"Well, Barbie," he said softly, which didn't sound like his usual self either. "I'd rather go high, even when Killian chose to go low and play dirty. I refuse to stoop to his level."

I looked bored and fought to keep my other eye open to peer at him.

"Good to see you're getting better, Barbie. Have I ever told you that you're beautiful?"

"You haven't, sir," I said. "You only told me that I smelled delicious, then you sank your big fangs into my neck when I was your squire."

He blinked.

"Anyway, Sir Louis, did you bring me a gift?"

He looked confused, so I decided to help him out.

"They say in this realm, a man must give a woman nice gifts when he visits her with intentions. Since this is a date, what gift did you bring me?"

He stared at me, taken aback. "No female has ever asked me for a gift before, especially not directly. I guess they dared not."

"Their loss," I said in displeasure. "But I'm a woman of my own mind. I know what I want, and I go for it."

An incredulous expression flitted by his eyes. For a tick, he was speechless, before a grin broke out on his face. "That's the little Bob I knew. Killian might call you Barbie, but he can never tame you. No one can."

"Now we know what kind of man Prince Louis is," Pucker chimed in, planting his butt on the table near us. "He didn't bring you a gift, did he? While he's a cheap date, he bad-mouths our prince."

Louis was about to backhand Pucker, but then he dropped his hand, remembering my protectiveness over Pucker.

I thinned my lips. "I just thought it was a custom in the realm to pay respect to one's date."

"Who told you about this non-existent custom?" Louis asked.

"Sir Killian," I lied easily.

"I knew it was that asshole's doing!" Louis growled before mellowing his tone and schooling his expression to gaze at me. "I apologize, Barbie, for my neglect, since Killian didn't inform me that this was supposed to be a speed date and a gift was expected. In fact, he's been trying to block me?—"

‘My, my, Prince Louis," Pucker cut in. "Since you admitted your error sincerely, I'll let you in on a little secret as to what kind of gifts you should bring Barbie. Do not bring flowers, as flowers are everywhere in Mist of Cinder. They cost nothing. Chocolates won't gain you any favor either. Barbie can have them free in the house. She also secretly raided two bakery shops and hoarded two boxes of strawberry chocolates in her room." I gave him a glare, but he focused on the vampire. "Don't be like those cheap fools who think a single flower can get them into a chick's pants. Times have changed. In today's market, where there are no brakes on inflation, my lady would appreciate jewelry, especially diamonds, for a gift. She'll be in need of them if she has to flee the realm in a hurry."

Both Louis and I stared at him incredulously, though for different reasons.

"When she leaves," Pucker said with determination, "I'll go with her!"

Then, out of the blue, an ear-piercing alarm blared in the room. The vampire prince and I jumped out of our seats. My heart rammed into my rib cage. My foot dropped from the edge of the chair. Louis shot to his feet, baring his fangs and positioning himself in front of me on the other side of the enormous table, ready to take on any threat and defend me.

"Prince Louis," Pucker said with glee, and bowed deeply, "I'm afraid that your five minutes is up. Prince Silas of the House of Shifters is next!"