Chapter 10

chapter

ten

Charlotte

By the time Wednesday morning rolls around and it's time for my next ultrasound, I've made a firm decision. Max deserves to be as much a part of this pregnancy as I do. In just a few months hockey season will start, and he'll be on the road a lot. So we have to make this time count.

I'm going to ask him to move in with me. But only as the baby's father. I know that's not what he said he wants, but he still needs time to absorb all of this. It's going to be hugely life changing for both of us.

I've already got one failed marriage under my belt, I'm not ready to go down that road again. And then there's the age difference. I know Max says he doesn't care, but other people will notice. They'll care. I'll be called a cradle-robber and plenty of other things.

Normally I could give two shits about what people say about me. But there's this feeling in the back of my mind that eventually Max will care about how much older I am than him. The more people around us point it out, the sooner he'll realize it.

Having Evan walk away hurt. He gave up on us at the first sign of trouble. Trouble he blamed on me. But obviously I'm not as infertile as he thought. I blow out a breath and squeeze the steering wheel.

Watching Max walk away would break me. I've never felt about anyone the way I feel about him. Yes, I could just grab onto him with both hands, and we could stroll into our future with our baby on the way.

But he will grow tired of me eventually.

At least this way, I have amazing memories of his touch and how we made our baby. For future reference though, I just need to think of him as my baby's father. Nothing more.

I pull into the parking lot of my OB/GYN's office and find Max already here. He's leaning against his car, arms crossed over his chest. He smiles and stands all the way up when he sees me.

Good grief, could he not have come looking like the yummiest of snacks? He's wearing blue jeans—despite the fact that it feels like we actually live on the sun outside—and a t-shirt. The white cotton stretches over his broad shoulders, then clings to his pectorals and biceps like an obsessed lover.

Okay, I might be projecting here a little. Whatever. He looks so damn hot. So hot, in fact, that a girl in scrubs literally walks into a car walking past him. Yeah, I get it, girl.

He walks over to my driver's side and opens my door. "Hey, beautiful." Then there's that smile.

As if the second trimester didn't make me horny enough, now I have this man smiling at me like that. Yay! Awesome for me that I get to go into my appointment with my pussy wet. They'll know I've been aroused. Maybe I shouldn't have invited him to this appointment.

He bends and kisses my cheek. "You ready?"

"I am. Are you excited?"

"Yes! I've only ever seen ultrasounds on movies and whatnot." He puts his hand on my lower back and together we walk into the appointment.

I sign in and the receptionist and insurance coordinator stare blatantly at Max from behind the big desk. Of course they do. I walk back and sit next to him and ignore the looks of confusion that cross the women's faces.

They probably think he's my son. This was such a bad idea.

"Charlie, you can come on back," the nurse says from the open doorway.

I stand and Max stands right along with me. The nurse's eyebrows crawl into her hairline as she takes in the man behind me.

"Uh—," she says.

"I'm the father," Max says cheerfully, not noticing at all how out of place he is standing next to me.

I blow out a breath and just follow the nurse to the exam room.

"Disrobe from the waist down as the doctor wants to do an inter-vaginal scan as well. Then he'll be with you in a few minutes." Her eyes flick to Max again, but he's locked in on me. She finally leaves the room and closes the door behind her.

I stare at him for a minute wondering if I should bother asking him to turn around. It's not like he hasn't seen me everywhere. And this is not a sexual scenario. I decide to just ignore the fact that he's standing close to me. I remove my shorts and panties, then get up on the table and drape the thin sheet over me.

His eyes are glued to the roundness of my stomach. Since I was already a larger woman, my "bump" as they like to call it didn't show up until recently. I still just looked big. Though it seems my boobs have doubled in size.

I hold my hand out to him and pull him closer, then I press his fingers to the spot where our baby is kicking me.

A smile lights up his face. "That's amazing. You have a tiny human inside you," he says, his voice full of wonder.

"I know. It's still weird to think about. But considering he likes to kick me all night long, I'm very aware of his presence."

There's a knock on the door and then the doctor steps inside. "I'm told the father is joining us today," he quips. Then his eyes land on me, then move to Max. He just nods but doesn't say anything else. "Normally I'd have the ultrasound technician do this, but because of the high-risk status of your pregnancy, I want to do it myself."

"High risk?" Max asks.

"It's nothing to worry about." I squeeze his hand.

"She had some elevated blood pressures early on and has shown some symptoms that she could develop gestational diabetes. Everything is treatable and shouldn't negatively affect her or the baby, but we like to keep an extra eye on our higher risk patients." Then the doctor is rolling the equipment closer and taking a seat on the stool.

I glance up at Max to see his eyes filled with concern and moisture.

Oh this sweet, sweet man. His heart is so big.

"I'm okay," I tell him. "Promise."

He just bends down and kisses my forehead.

The ultrasound proceeds with the doctor zooming in on body parts and measuring everything.

Max stares at the screen. "You can see his little bones."

I smile and nod, my own eyes growing misty.

"Do we want to know the baby's sex?" the doctor asks.

I glance at Max and we both nod. "Yes, please."

"Alright, let's see if we've got a cooperative patient today. Baby is measuring perfectly, and I don't see any anomalies."

I exhale as relief pours over me. I hadn't realized how nervous I was about that.

"Okay so what we're looking for here is a noticeable equal sign indicates a girl and then that," the doctor laughs, pointing at the screen, "is your son's penis. Congratulations you're having a boy."

"You were right," Max says.

"The mother often knows," the doctor says. He wipes the jelly off my stomach, then begins to prep the wand.

When he's rolling the "condom" down on it, Max goes still beside me.

"What are you going to do with that?"

The doctor looks up. "Exactly what you're thinking over there, young man. I need to get a close up look at Charlie's cervix to make sure everything is good there."

Max looks horrified, but continues to stand next to me, holding my hand.

"Okay, everything looks great. You keep doing what you're doing, Charlie. Walk when you can and drink plenty of water. Keep sticking to the low sodium diet as well."

I nod.

The doctor pats Max on the arm. "You should definitely take her out for a nice meal now. Y'all have reason to celebrate."

"Thank you, doctor," Max says.

Once we're left alone, Max leans down to my head again. "Holy shit, that was terrifying. How have you been doing this all alone?"

"I haven't been completely alone. I have Brendan and our sister, Chelsea." I hold my hand out. "Help me up."

He does and the sheet falls to the floor.

"I feel like I've been slimed," I mutter, wiping more of the goop off of me. I quickly dress, then leave. After scheduling my next appointment, we leave the office together.