11. Emma

Chapter 11

Emma

I can't remember ever being this happy but there's a part of me that knows that it's too good to be true. The double date that we went on my second night home was as close to perfect as it could be. I tried to be standoffish and keep my guard up but Maddox broke through it all. We may have only held hands but it was a start. The whole night, he focused on me. Since then, he’s always asking me random questions wanting to know more about me.

Since I got home, Maddox has been sleeping on my family couch. It seems like any spare time we've had, we've been together. Carson and Candace left a couple of days ago to go to Candace's house. She was all excited to introduce Carson to her family. I'm happy for them but I am a little nervous about being along with Maddox.

We have went to the movies. We've eaten out numerous times. We've hung out at the Ride-or-Die bar and when I thought that he would try to hide his attraction towards me, he didn't. He made a point to hold my hand or put his arm around me in front of all of the men of the mc. I’ve waited on Bull to say something about it but he hasn't. There's a thousand times I've almost asked Maddox what's going on between us but I've been too afraid to. I'm leaving tomorrow to go back to school and I would say I don’t want to rock the boat, but honestly, I’m afraid of what his answer will be.

We’re sitting on the couch watching television but I'm not really following what's going on. Maddox has his arm around me and Mom and Bull are at the Ride-or-Die bar. We’ve been doing this charade for at least an hour because I know he’s not watching the movie either.

I look over at him in the dark. The only light is coming from the television and instead of watching it, he's watching me. He brushes the hair off of my face and tucks it behind my ear. He's looking at me as if he's in awe. I lean forward and press my lips to his. The kiss ravages me. It brings to the surface so many memories of that night so long ago. He's holding me tightly against him, his hands stroking up and down my back.

I feel as if I cannot get close enough to him and I climb up on my knees, straddling him on the couch. His hardness is pressed against the core of my body. I shift my hips forwards and backwards, side to side, wanting the friction to build between us. "Please, Maddox," I say.

I'm practically pleading with him to take me. I reach between us and cup his manhood through his jeans. His hips flex, pushing into me. My head falls back and I moan loudly, filling the room with my breathless desire. I reach for the button on his pants and open them, and as soon as I do he freezes underneath of me.

His hands, wrapped tightly around my waist, almost painfully, he lifts me from his lap and sets me next to him on the couch before he jumps up, backing away from the couch. “Fuck!” He all but screams.

I’m trembling, watching him from the couch. Desire is raging through my veins and I don’t know what to make of his outburst. “Come back over here, Mad. Talk to me.”

He looks at me, his nose flared, his arms flexing. I hold my hand out to him but he doesn’t take it. "I can't do this, Emma. I can't."

I open my mouth to argue with him and he's shaking his head. He looks so frustrated, so mad. "I have to go."

Before I can even say a word he's out the door, slamming it shut behind him. I sit here speechless. I refuse to cry. I've been down this road before and I should've known that it would go this way again. I’ve been played... again. Fuck, I’m a fool.

I pull myself together and straighten up the living room. I'm determined to act like nothing happened when Bull and Mom get home. Finally, an hour later I hear the motorcycle pull into the driveway. I paste a smile to my face and greet them as they come in. I set the remote down as if I've been flipping through the channels.

My mom looks all around the room before asking, "Where is Maddox?"

I smile as if he didn’t just break my heart in two. "Oh, he had to go home tonight. I guess he was tired of sleeping on this couch, not that I can blame him. But I wanted to stay up to let you all know that I was going to have to leave early in the morning instead of tomorrow afternoon."

Bull comes over and kisses me on the top of the head. "I'm hitting the hay, kid, but I'll see you in the morning before you leave. I love you."

"I love you too," I tell him.

He walks out of the room and I avoid my mother's gaze. She sits down in the chair opposite of me. I can feel her staring at me. I sigh and blow out a breath. “What is it, Mom?”

"Where's Maddox?"

Obviously I wasn't convincing enough the first time. "He's gone, Mom. We're not together. He's not into me like that."

She rears back in surprise. "He said that?"

I purse my lips and nod. "Yeah, pretty much."

I turn off the television and stand up. I walk toward her and lean down to hug her. "I'll see you in the morning before I leave. I love you, Mama."

Her voice trails after me as I leave. "I love you too."

It's not until I get into my room and the door shut behind me that I let the tears start to flow.