23. Mylo

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

MYLO

The moment Bishop said Noah was going to be okay, I was up and out of that clinic faster than I even knew I could move. I felt Holden's eyes on me, burning holes into my back as I shoved past the doors and bolted outside. I barely made it around the corner before I puked—everything I'd eaten today, everything I'd felt, all of it coming out in one gross wave.

I felt weak, drained, and my brain wouldn't stop spinning. There was a tightness in my chest, an ache in my stomach that had nothing to do with what I'd just thrown up. The world had shifted on its axis—like everything I thought I knew had been a lie, and now I had to figure out what was real and what wasn't.

I walked home, each step heavy, my heart pounding like it was trying to jump out of my chest. Shifters. Holden's a bear. Noah is a wolf. Shifters.

People turned into a animals…

When I got inside, I slammed the door behind me out of pure instinct. The small cabin was dim, the lights still off, the place feeling colder and emptier than it ever had. I dragged myself to the freezer, grabbed an ice pack, and pressed it to my head. The cold bit into my skin as I flopped onto the couch. It was supposed to help clear my thoughts, ease the pounding in my head—but nothing was working right now.

"Shifters," I mumbled out loud, shaking my head. "Like, what the hell even…"

My voice sounded strange in the silence—too loud, too unsure. I squeezed my eyes shut, taking a breath, trying to make it all fit together in my mind. Noah. God, Noah. The one person who'd been there for me when I needed someone most. The one who'd shown me kindness when I thought I'd never have a family. And he'd been a wolf this entire time?

I sighed, letting my head fall back against the couch. I couldn't wrap my brain around it. I knew what I saw. Noah had saved me. He'd fought for me, protected me like he always did, except this time… he wasn't even human.

And that weirdly didn't change anything.

Noah was still Noah—still the man who'd treated me like I was someone worth protecting.

I guess I should've been terrified—I probably should be terrified. But I couldn't be.

Because if Noah was still Noah, then… Holden was still Holden, right?

"Holden…" I whispered, running my fingers over my temple, trying to massage away the ache. His face flashed in my mind—the way he'd looked at me in the clinic, desperate, like he was ready to take on the world for me. It made my heart twist, and not in a good way.

Because even though I knew Holden would've done anything to keep me safe, the truth was… I didn't fit here. Not really.

The ice pack slipped from my forehead, landing on the floor, but I didn't move to pick it up. I was too busy trying to figure out where I went from here. Holden's a bear. That's what I'd seen—that's what I'd been running from. He'd shifted right in front of me, fought off those wolves, and then looked at me like… like he was scared I'd never look at him the same again.

"And maybe I don't," I admitted, my voice shaky. "Maybe I don't know what to think anymore."

It felt like my whole world had tilted—like all the pieces I thought I had figured out had been scattered, and now I was scrambling to put them back together. And the truth was, I wasn't sure they would fit the same way again. I'd thought I was finally finding a place for myself, a home. I'd thought maybe Holden was it. But now…

I closed my eyes, letting out a slow breath. Were they all shifters. The whole resort. Hell, the whole damn town. And here I was, some guy who didn't even know where he came from—who didn't have a real family, a real home. Who the hell was I kidding, thinking I could belong here? Thinking I could have a place in this world that didn't really belong to me?

"Maybe I should've just stayed in Charlotte," I muttered, shaking my head. Maybe Chuck had done me a favor after all, screwing things up the way he had. Maybe it was my sign that I was never meant to stay—never meant to have any of this.

And yet, the thought of leaving made my chest ache. The idea of walking away from Holden, from everything I'd started to build here—it hurt. And that was the problem, wasn't it? I didn't fit, but I wanted to. More than anything, I wanted to belong here. To be a part of Holden's world, even if it was a world I didn't understand.

"Damn it," I cursed, scrubbing a hand over my face. "What the hell am I supposed to do now?"

I sat there, staring at the ceiling, waiting for some kind of answer that never came.

I shouldn't have been surprised when the knock echoed through my cabin. I knew it was coming—knew who was on the other side of that door before I even dragged myself off the couch to answer it. I paused for a second, staring at the door, then let out a shaky breath. Might as well get this over with.

When I opened it, there he was. Holden, standing there like he'd been ripped straight from my thoughts—which, considering how much space he took up in my brain lately, wasn't too far off. His face was tight, worry etched into every line. His eyes were locked on me, searching for something.

"Bear," I said, crossing my arms over my chest, because I had to say something, and what the hell else was there to say?

Holden blinked, taken aback for a second, and then his brow furrowed. "Are you pregnant?"

I looked away, biting my lip. It wasn't exactly a yes-or-no question. Or maybe it was, but the answer wasn't that simple. I shrugged, my gaze falling to the floor. "I don't know. I think so."

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, his voice soft, full of something that made my chest ache. He sounded… hurt. And I hated that.

I took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. "I hadn't decided what I was going to do yet," I admitted. "So, I didn't want to find out and make it real. After all, I'm not exactly in a stable situation, am I?"

Holden's face twisted, and he took a step closer, his hand reaching out like he was about to touch me, but he stopped just short. "Mylo, I'm so sorry," he whispered, his eyes filled with regret. "I never wanted to make you feel like this. Like you couldn't trust me, or like you weren't safe here. I… I messed up. And I promise, I will never keep anything from you again."

I looked up at him, meeting his eyes, and for the first time, I saw something there that I hadn't allowed myself to see before. Vulnerability. Fear. He meant it. Every word. And that's when I knew—really knew—that he wasn't just saying this because he felt guilty. He was saying it because he wanted me to stay. Because he cared.

"Tell me everything," I said, my voice barely a whisper.

Holden nodded, his shoulders sagging like a weight had just settled on them. He took a deep breath, and then he started talking.

He told me everything. About shifters. About how they worked, how they lived, the rules they followed. He told me about his family, about the town, about all the people I'd met who were just like him—who had this whole other side to them that I'd never known about. It was a lot. A whole lot. But I listened, because this was Holden. And I needed to understand.

And then he told me about James.

"I was twelve," he said, his voice low, his eyes distant, like he was seeing back in time. "He was my best friend. We'd been friends since we were kids—we'd always been inseparable. And I… I thought I could trust him. I thought…" He shook his head, a sad smile tugging at his lips. "I thought I was doing the right thing. I thought he'd understand."

I swallowed, my throat tight. "What happened?"

I knew this wasn't going to go well.

Holden's jaw clenched, his eyes closing for a moment before he looked at me again. "I told him. I broke the rule—the most basic rule of being a shifter. Keep the secret. But I told him. And he didn't believe me. So, I shifted."

My heart pounded, my stomach twisting as I watched the pain flash across his face. He took a shaky breath, his gaze dropping to the floor.

"He panicked," Holden continued, his voice barely audible. "He ran. He wasn't looking where he was going—he was looking back at me. I'd shifted into my bear. I thought… I thought it would be easier to believe, and we'd been friends forever. I figured he would just see me, so it wouldn't be as scary, you know? But it wasn't. And he ran."

I could feel my chest tightening, my heart breaking for him. I took a step closer, my hand resting on his arm. "Holden…"

"I didn't shift back," he said, his voice cracking. "I didn't even think to. If I had, maybe I could've warned him. Maybe I could've…" He shook his head, his eyes glistening. "He ran off a cliff. He didn't see it. And I… I watched it happen. I buried him, Mylo. And then I promised myself I'd never break the rules again. That I'd never let anyone get that close again."

My chest ached, and I felt tears pricking at the corners of my eyes. I stepped closer, wrapping my arms around him, holding him tight. He stiffened for a second, then relaxed, his arms wrapping around me in return, holding me like I was the only thing keeping him grounded.

"I was so afraid, Mylo," he whispered against my hair. "I was afraid that if I told you, you'd freak out. That you'd run, and I… I can't lose you. I can't do that again."

I pulled back just enough to look up at him, my hand resting on his cheek. "I'm not going anywhere," I said, my voice steady. "I'm not James, Holden. And I'm not going to run."

As I said the words, I realized I meant them.

He looked at me, his eyes filled with something that looked like hope—like maybe, just maybe, he could believe me. He let out a shaky breath, his forehead resting against mine.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered. "For everything. For keeping this from you, for making you feel like you couldn't trust me. I'll never keep anything from you again. I swear it."

I nodded, my fingers brushing against his jaw. "Okay," I said softly. "But you're going to have to help me understand all of this. Because right now, it's a lot. And I… I don't know how to feel about it yet."

Holden nodded, his eyes never leaving mine. "I will. I'll tell you everything. I'll help you understand. Just… don't give up on me. On us."

I smiled, leaning up to press a soft kiss to his lips. "I won't," I whispered. "I promise."

Holden's arms tightened around me, pulling me closer, and for the first time in days, I felt like maybe—just maybe—things were going to be okay. It wasn't perfect. It wasn't easy. But it was real. And for now, that was enough.