Chapter 14

14

Lauren sat in her office, trying as hard as she could to concentrate on getting some work done. It was the first day off from filming that she'd had, and if she didn't get this work done now, who knew when she would have another chance. Things were already getting out of control at her small, one-person real estate agency—and she'd only been doing this job for a week.

The problem was, Lauren didn't like entrusting important things to other people. She did have a receptionist, but it wasn't that receptionist's job to deal with anything real estate related. She was a nice girl who worked part time answering the phone, filing, and getting coffee for clients while they waited. Certainly not someone Lauren could fully depend on when she was out of the office for long stretches of time.

So it was really important that Lauren use any blocks of time that she had free from filming to her best advantage. Already, she'd received a call from an appraiser letting her know that she'd missed an appointment that they'd set up. It was so unlike Lauren to miss an appointment that the man actually assumed that it was his mistake.

Lauren did feel that she could get past these growing pains in her business—both her real estate business and the television business—and learn to manage them both equally successfully if she could only focus. Focus was the key.

However, focus was the one thing she couldn't seem to maintain. Focus on her work, that is. The issue was that she was highly focused on something besides work—namely Ben.

If she was honest with herself, the truth was she'd been distracted by Ben from pretty much the moment she met him. That distraction had taken the form of annoyance, but now she realized that the irritation she felt had merely been her brain's way of directing her attention towards Ben.

Now, the distraction was taking a new and more painful turn. All she could think about was the ball last night, how handsome he looked, how sexy, how she wished that she had been there with him—and how he completely ignored her the entire night.

Questions plagued her.

Where did he go after the ball?

Did he leave with Kelly?

Why didn't he talk to her?

Was he angry with her?

Was he hurt?

Was he trying to prove a point?

Was she being dramatic to think that he was intentionally ignoring her and in fact it was as simple as he just didn't care if she'd been there or not?

And the shallowest of all the questions—how was it possible that he'd looked that amazing in his suit?

Lauren felt as if everything in her life were spinning out of control. She was letting her business fall to the wayside while she pursued a television opportunity that might or might not pan out. She was giving her heart and soul to a man who might or might not view her as just a weekend conquest—a glorified groupie—and she couldn't seem to stop herself. And now , she was sacrificing her one uninterrupted workday to obsess over him.

Who was she? Who was this person she was becoming? Because it certainly wasn't Lauren Harrison.

She was certainly not a person who would count the hours down until she was going to see a man again, yet that's precisely what she was doing with Ben. She glanced at the clock. Nineteen more to go.

She was certainly not a person who would ever second-guess her decisions and her actions, yet here she was—sitting at her desk when she should be working—wondering if she was doing the right thing in backing off from Ben or if she was passing up the opportunity of a lifetime.

She was certainly not a person who would ever waste time sitting around, analyzing over and over again every little sentence or phrase that a man had said to her. Yet that is exactly what she found herself doing now. Choosing little sentences, little responses, Ben had said to her and trying to pick them apart piece by piece.

What was his tone of voice when he said it? What was the expression on his face at the time? Was he touching her arm? Were there two ways to take that phrase? Was he joking? Was he being sarcastic?

And she wasn't doing this merely for things he said to her this weekend. Oh, no. That would be somewhat sane. Nope, she was mentally rehashing all the things he'd ever said to her over the course of their entire relationship. She snorted. Their entire relationship? Yes, the entire three weeks they had known each other. Quite a relationship.

Get a grip .

She was doing everything in her power to stop the movie that was playing on a loop in her brain—the movie starring Ben Stevens—but it was apparently a marathon and she'd bought a ticket she couldn't refund.

The Ben Stevens movie marathon didn't only contain scenes of uncertainty and angst, however. There were moments—many moments—of pure happiness. There were moments that were replaying in her brain—with ever-increasing frequency—that showed her just how sweet it might be to make a life with Ben Stevens.

For instance, she thought about how incredibly helpful he'd been with the television show. He completely rescued her at the screen test, which led to her being hired, which could turn out to be an incredible opportunity for her if the show got picked up.

She didn't discount her own role in that. Lauren was never one to downplay her own gifts and talents, but there was absolutely no arguing that, if Ben hadn't stepped in when he did, her stage fright would have ruined it all. In that sense, this entire adventure was all because of him.

After they'd been on set together as well, he'd taken the lead in showing her the ropes. He could've been condescending, or he could've ignored her. There were times on the set that she felt like everyone was speaking in code and she had absolutely no idea how to decipher it.

If Ben wanted to let her sink, it would've been as simple as just letting those instances go, knowing that she wasn't clear on what was needed from her and simply not help her, letting her flounder. But he never did, not even once.

Most people she knew in real estate were completely out for themselves. It wasn't that they were back stabbers by any means. They didn't go out of their way to steal things that weren't theirs or to sabotage anyone else's success. It wasn't like that. But just as in any other highly competitive profession where large amounts of money were at stake, everyone looked out for number one. You weren't going to see someone helping out a less experienced professional when it was highly possible that that person would be gunning for their job or their clients at some point.

She could only imagine that it was worse in show business. There were bigger egos involved and the stakes were even higher. Multimillion-dollar paydays and lucrative jobs that could potentially stretch years into the future, were on the line. You don't just give a leg up to someone who might one day replace you. It just wasn't done.

Yet...Ben did.

Every time she needed help… there he was.

Every time she didn't understand something…there he was.

Every time she'd been stressed out about the workload? There he was.

In fact, in just about every instance that she could think of in the short time she had known him, he was always there to help.

Could the same be said in reverse?

With regret, she realized, it certainly could not.

She'd never given Ben Stevens one iota of a reason to be nice to her, yet he was.

Lauren wasn't entirely sure what was happening between her and Ben, but she was pretty sure that she was beginning to like him.

A lot .

--- ~ ---

Ben knew he was a few minutes late getting to the production meeting and he really didn't care. He'd been dreading this meeting since he saw Lauren kiss her "friend" on the dance floor at Saturday night's ball.

He had no idea if she spent the entire night lip-locked to the guy. He avoided her, and the first chance he got, he split.

Logically, he knew he had no say in who Lauren dated or kissed, but damn. That didn't mean he had to like it.

And he was pretty sure she was purposely ignoring him the whole night. He didn't get so much as a ‘hello' from her the entire evening. Not even a nod of acknowledgement from across the room.

Really?

He shook his head. This was not him. He didn't moon over girls or worry about who they were kissing. He didn't get his feelings hurt because the girl he liked was ignoring him.

He quickly needed to remove his head from his ass. He knew he had a job to do—bills to pay. He had people in his life that depended on him, people who had real problems, not like the ridiculous things he was worrying about with Lauren.

And his bills were getting bigger lately. He needed the very large paycheck that would come if this second show were to be picked up. It would help take the strain off. He didn't have control over a whole lot of things in his life, but he had a small margin of control in whether or not the pickup would happen. He could give the show the best possible shot by doing his best work.

Trying to shake off the melancholy that was plaguing him since he saw Lauren in the arms of another man, he pushed open the door to the cabin where the production meeting was already under way.

The AD looked up as Ben entered. "Ben! Thanks for joining us!" he teased, and the rest of the meeting attendees joined in good-natured laughter at the joke.

Ben smiled at the teasing and took the sole empty seat in the room, which was right next to Lauren.

He felt her looking at him but didn't trust himself to look in her direction without giving away a hint of what he was feeling. So—again opting for the mature route here—he just didn't look at her at all.

Paul stood and started the meeting. "I think we can agree that last week was a success," he began, and everyone in the room clapped and cheered. Ben's spirits lifted a bit. It could never be a completely bad day when the boss started out a meeting with those words, right?

"But we can't rest on our laurels," he continued. "We have a jam-packed schedule over these next two weeks if we're going to turn in a kick-ass pilot. I really think we've got something here, folks. But that doesn't mean we're not going to have to work for it. That said, your new itineraries, call times, and info packets are being passed around to you. Any questions?"

Ben felt Lauren shift in her chair beside him before he heard her ask, "It says that we need to do an ADR session?"

The AD was picking up his papers and just said, "Yeah. We can't use production sound for anything we've shot outside."

He knew she had no idea still what ADR, which stood for Automated Dialogue Replacement, would entail. And last week—hell, three days ago—he would've told her exactly what it was and what she could expect in a session.

But, today, he started a conversation with the script supervisor and walked out leaving Lauren and her question behind.

He also made sure that Lauren was out of wardrobe before he was "available" to go in.

But as he stepped into the cabin, he realized he couldn't truly escape her. He smelled her scent. It permeated the air with the aromas of wildflowers and vanilla. He saw Polaroids of her all over the walls. Were these more Polaroids than usual? Were Marlene and Barbara messing with him? Hell, an obsessive stalker would've been impressed with the amount of Polaroids plastered on every damn surface.

Ben shook his head. He needed to get ahold of himself.

His resolve was short-lived, however. As it turned out, Lauren was the hot topic of conversation between Barbara and Marlene the entire fitting. All the wardrobe ladies could talk about was how insanely amazing Lauren's body was, how much fun she was to dress. How sweet she'd been with them—that it was like she had this hard image but underneath it she was just a big softie.

Ben was silent. He didn't want to talk about Lauren's body or the fact that, underneath her outer shell, she was really a soft, sweet girl.

This was exactly why he never let himself get involved with anyone he worked with; it was just too complicated.