Chapter Nineteen

It's today. I've made it to twenty years old. In the past, I never thought I would see my twentieth birthday. Between beatings, I always figured my father would take one too far, and I would have died. When Igor held me captive, I thought malysh (baby) and I would both die. Instead, I am alive and laying in the arms of my muzh (husband). Our syn (son) is pushing on my bladder. Lenya removes his arm from around me as if he already knows I need to get up. Afterward, I take my medication and get dressed for the day.

"You can't wear that," Lenya insists, implying the need for a different attire. He is leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed and a relaxed expression on his face. I look down at the sweatpants and baggy shirt. I expected to spend my day curled up on the couch with a book.

"Pochemu? (Why?)," I ask, mimicking his crossed arms.

Lenya moves to his side of the closet, retrieving clothes to wear. "I am taking you out to breakfast," he said with a mischievous smile. "You won't be doing any cooking today."

Is this a breakfast date? When he smiles mischievously, I know he is up to something.

I watch him put on casual clothes, including jeans, a shirt, a leather jacket, and tennis shoes. I grab my maternity jeans and a flowy blouse, presenting them to him for his feedback. He nods as he laces up his shoes. After dressing, I grab a platok and wrap it around my neck, feeling its soft fabric against my skin. In the foyer, Raisa and Dmitriy stand patiently, ready to greet us.

"Ilya not joining us?" I tease, Raisa giving me a sly smile.

"He will meet us there. He needed fresh clothes after passing out on the couch last night." Dmitriy says, helping Raisa into her coat, then puts his own on. Lenya grabs my coat from the hook, and holds it up for me to slip into.

We all settle into the comfortable seats of the SUV, feeling the soft leather beneath us as Lenya steers toward the heart of Moscow. Lenya turns on the stereo, and the familiar melodies of my favorite songs fill the car. After a thirty-minute drive, we pull into an upscale parking garage. It's getting closer to lunchtime now, considering the time it took us to leave and arrive here. My stomach grumbles in anticipation of a delicious meal. Everyone else exits the vehicle, leaving me behind. Lenya opens the car door, offering a helping hand as I step out. Out of sight from my sister and Dmitriy, Lenya pulls me close and kisses me with a passion that steals my breath away.

"I've been waiting all morning to feel your lips against mine. I couldn't wait any longer. S dnem rozhdeniya, moy prekrasnyy tsvetok. Moya l'vitsa, ty tak lyubima.(Happy birthday, my beautiful flower. My lioness, you are so loved.)" His words bring tears to the corners of my eyes. He pulls me to his chest, kissing the top of my head.

Holding hands, we exit the garage and find ourselves in the heart of Moscow. The street is busy with pedestrians and cars. He leads us to a building to the right and as we approach; the door is opened for us. As we check our coats, I am struck by the emptiness of this high-end restaurant, with only a few scattered patrons. As I turn to face Lenya, all I see is his coy smile, teasing me with secrets. He holds out his elbow to me; I take it. "What are you up to, moy lev (my lion)? Should I be worried?" My suspicion levels are at an absolute high. Surprises are something that I have a strong negative feeling towards. As a child, a surprise always brought about sense of dread.

My palms sweat, and I can't control my heart's racing. I keep repeating in my mind, "Everything is okay. Lenya would never hurt you." I repeat it over and over. I can feel my body tremble as we move forward down the foyer of the restaurant.

We turn the corner and I am met with the smiling faces of Mila and Oleg holding Alexei. Ilya stands next to his brother, smiling, but I know that his smile is not for me. His eyes are on my sister.

"S dnem rozhdeniya! (Happy Birthday)" Everyone says in unison.

The emotions that I am holding in flood out, I cry, and it's not the usual tears of joy that one would expect. I can't think of anything else except running. So that's what I do. I hurriedly leave the room and stumble upon the bathroom. The door slams shut with a loud thud and I sink onto the bench in front of the vanity. Oxygen fills my lungs as I try to steady my breathing, and I whisper to myself that I am okay. On the vanity, there are tissues within reach. I grab one and use it to wipe the tears from my face.

The door creaks open and I see my sister's face in the mirror. I give her half a smile as my eyes refill with tears. She comes to sit next to me on the bench, taking my hand in hers. "This isn't like at home. Surprises can be wonderful things now. You know he wouldn't do anything to put you in harm's way. He doesn't know why you don't like surprises, does he?" My eyes meet hers. I shake my head. "Lina," Raisa murmurs quietly, "he should know."

What does it matter now? Why mention the past again, particularly when the individuals who caused the pain are no longer here?

"What do you need to tell me, moy prekrasnyy tsvetok (my beautiful flower)?" Lenya's voice is soft and gives off the hint of his worry. I didn't even hear the door open again. Raisa nods her head with an encouraging smile, urging me to tell him.

I feel sick. I"d rather not talk about this.

"Raisa, will you leave us for a minute?" Lenya asks.

"Govorit' s nim. Skazhi yemu.(Talk to him. Tell him.)" My sister kisses my cheek and rises from the bench and Lenya holds the door open for her, closing and locking it after she leaves so nobody else can enter..

"Is it alright if I come to sit with you, or would you rather I stay where I am?" His consideration of my comfort just highlights how amazing he is as a muzh (husband). With a small smile, I motion to the bench. He comes to sit down, reaching for my hand. "Pozhaluysta, pogovori so mnoy. (Please, talk to me.)" As he speaks, his voice trembles, the emotion he struggling to hold back so evident in his tone.

His thumb runs over the top of my hand and the ring on my finger. I take a deep breath and let it out everything that I have hidden for so long.The trauma I have buried deep inside where no one could ever see it.

"Do you remember when I said Ivan didn't take an interest in me until I was older?" Lenya nods, his fist clenches at his side at the sound of Ivan's name. I continue. "On occasions when my father was excessively drunk or wanted to inflict suffering upon me, he came up with the idea to send Ivan over as a surprise. He always called it a surprise. Whenever I hear someone say they have a surprise planned for me, I become anxious and my instinctive reaction is to escape. I can't separate the idea of a surprise from being groped or beaten. I'm sorry if I ruined the get-together you planned."

"Never apologize," he says, holding up his hand to stop me from continuing. "While I may not have known, you ruined nothing. Do you want to be here right now? Say the words and I will take you home or wherever you do want to be."

"Would it be awful if I said I just want to be with you?" I whisper, biting my lip.

Without hesitation, he stands, offering me his hand. After helping me up, he walks us out and tells the coat check to get our coats. "Stay here." Lenya walks back to the private room, and I hear muffled voices go back and forth. He walks out, takes my coat, and helps me into it. After putting his on, he takes my hand in his and we leave.

"Now what, moya prekrasnyy tsvetok (My beautiful flower)? You tell me what you want to do. I'll take you anywhere." Lenya asks. We are already back at the car.

"Home, moy lev (my lion). Take me home."

Without hesitation, Lenya starts the car and drives us towards home. The tension between us is palpable as our hands remain entwined, a silent promise of the passion that awaits us. As we drive, I can't help but think about Raisa and Dmitriy, concerned about their plans for getting home.

I voice my concerns to Lenya, questioning what arrangements we have made for them. He reassures me, explaining that Raisa is delighted to spend time with Ilya, and Dmitriy will go with Oleg and Mila. He mentions Dmitriy wants to practice with Alexei to be helpful when the malysh (baby) arrives.

Lenya's grip on my hand tightens, his unwavering support evident in his touch. My only desire right now is to be with him, to feel his love surround me. As we pull up to our house, I can't contain my desire any longer. I turn to him, my voice filled with longing, and say, "Take me inside, moy lev (my lion). Make love to me."

Lenya's eyes meet mine, filled with the same desire and adoration. He quickly exits the car, rushing to open the door for me. As I step out, he takes my hand and leads me into our home, a sanctuary for our love. The anticipation builds with each step as we near our bedroom.

Once we're finally inside, the world fades away, leaving only the two of us. Our clothes fall to the floor, forgotten, as our bodies merge in a passionate embrace. The room fills with the intoxicating sound of our whispers, a symphony of love and desire. I know when I am in his arms; I am safe.

"You"re my everything, Tsvetok (Flower). You and our syn (son)." Lenya positions me on my side and enters me from behind. "Always so ready for me." He rumbles.

One of his hands wraps around my throat while the other hooks under my knee, to keep my legs open for him. His slow, deep thrusts bring me closer to the edge of a cataclysmic orgasm. The feeling of being so filled by him, feeling so complete. There"s nowhere else I"d rather be at this moment.

"You are going to come for me, Lina. Your muzh (husband) wants you to soak his cock." Lenya thrusts up into me, the pressure nearing its peak.

I moan heavily as I reach orgasm. A flood of warm fluid leaks from between my thighs. The orgasm paired with another sensation. Pressure has my eyes wide.

"Tsvetok (Flower)…" Lenya leans over and looks at the puddle that is in between our legs. "There has never been that much before."

"I think it was also my water breaking," I say, a slight panic in my voice.

Lenya pulls out and hops to his feet. "Der'mo (shit), khorosho(okay), what do I do?" Lenya asks, panic clear in his demeanor.

I"m at a loss for words to offer him.

"Let"s try calling the doctor. It's early, so we might have to go to the hospital." I say, clearing my throat as I hold my hands out to Lenya, and he pulls me to my feet. "Also, clothes would probably be good."

Lenya takes his shirt and wipes down my pussy and thighs, then himself. He pulls his underwear up, then runs to the closet. Returning with comfy sweats and a shirt along with undergarments, his phone to his ear. Motioning for me to sit on the bed, I do, and he helps me get dressed.

I listen as he talks with the doctor and explains what happened. Lenya's voice carries a mix of concern and urgency as he relays the situation to the doctor. I try to remain calm, but the panic still lingers in my voice. As he hangs up the phone, Lenya comes over to sit beside me on the bed, his eyes filled with worry.

"The doctor said we should head to the hospital," he says, his voice trembling slightly. "They want to make sure everything is okay with malysh (baby)."

I nod, feeling a mixture of fear and anticipation. We quickly gather our essentials and rush out the door, leaving behind the puddle on the bed as a reminder of the unexpected turn of events. The car ride to the hospital is filled with tense silence, broken only by the sound of our heavy breathing.

Upon arrival, we're greeted by a team of medical professionals who guide us to a room. They ask me a series of questions, checking my vital signs and monitoring the malysh's (baby"s) heartbeat. The atmosphere is charged with anticipation as we wait for further examination.

As time ticks by, Lenya grips my hand, offering words of reassurance and support. The doctor eventually arrives, performing a thorough examination and assesses the condition of the baby.

After what feels like an eternity, the doctor delivers the news. "Your water did break," she confirms. "But it appears to be a premature rupture of membranes. We will need to monitor you closely and discuss the best course of action for the baby's well-being."

My heart sinks, but I find solace because we are in capable hands. Lenya and I lean on each other for strength, determined to navigate this unexpected twist in our journey to parenthood.

"Looks like we will meet our syn sooner than expected. You should probably call my sister." I stifle a laugh, worry still present in my voice.