Chapter Five

Chapter Five

Erin couldn’t believe she’d just come screaming Warren’s name when less than an hour ago, she was promising herself she would avoid doing exactly that. So much for her plan to use him as her first step to get her life back on track. Instead, this was yet another mistake in a long line of questionable decisions she’d made that had brought her to exactly this place at exactly this time. It was as if someone had thrown a bucket of cold water on her.

She pushed him away and went for her pants, her legs still shaking from the force of her orgasm. Looking at him there on his knees, his dark eyes lit with desire as he took in every inch of her, made her want to throw caution to the wind and tackle him to the ground.

No. You already debased yourself by begging him to fuck you, and he saidno. This is about the goddamn game, and you’d be a fool to forget that. She cursed mentally. I’m batting a thousand at life right now. “That was nice.”

“Nice.” He climbed to his feet and watched her, the cold not seeming to bother him in the least. “You just came screaming my name and ‘nice’ is the best you can do?”

“I just call it like I see it.” And she was a goddamn liar. There’d been nothing nice about what he just did to her. It was hot and dirty and all sorts of wrong and right twisted up into deliciousness. But she couldn’t tell him that without opening the door for another round, which was not in the cards tonight. She pulled her jeans on. “And how I see it was that was nice.”

“You’re something else.”

“Been hearing that all my life.” And usually in exactly that tone of voice. It wasn’t fair to lay a lifetime of baggage at Warren’s feet, but he always seemed to dredge up her issues whenever they said more than two words to each other. The sex…the sex was so much simpler. If they could have just kept it physical, maybe being around him wouldn’t feel so damn confusing.

Maybe.

She yanked on her boots and stood. The look on his face said it all. He wasn’t done with her. Her heart skipped a beat, even as her head kicked into panic to avoid whatever he was opening his mouth to say. She blurted out the first thing that came to mind. “Your turn.”

“What?”

This was her chance. Just walk away. The night has already gone off the rails if you’re crazy enough to flash the damn sheriff and then nearly get busy in a freaking barn.You aren’t nineteen anymore, no matter how much it feels like it right now.

It was too late to go back, though. It had been too late the second she went back to New York after that summer of pure bliss she spent with him, a guy who’d already seen more of the world as a teenager than she could even begin to imagine. They were never meant to be together, but it was hard to remember that when his mouth and hands were on her. It was impossible to come back to Wellingford and not fish for information about him—Where was he stationed? Was he still doing okay? Was he going to be sent on yet another tour of Iraq or Afghanistan?—and that curiosity and worry hadn’t just magically stopped when they took the sex out of the equation. If they started up again, it would be so much worse.

Which meant she had to get through the night without a repeat of what they’d just done. “Or, really, it’s my turn. I pick dare, by the way.”

His mouth tightened. “That’s how it’s going to be, then.”

She started to mouth off, but sighed and shrugged into her coat. “That’s how it always is, Warren.” She’d spent a significant time working not to think about what her life would be like if they were different people in different circumstances. If he were willing to settle in one place that wasn’t Wellingford. If she were willing to put aside the dreams that led her to New York. If he didn’t love this town so much. If this town didn’t make her feel like she was wearing a sweater that was two sizes too small.

But she couldn’t spend her life hanging her hopes on what-ifs.

Especially when that was how she’d gotten into her current mess to begin with.

“Fine. You want a dare, you got it.” He snatched her hat off the ground and shoved it into her hands. “Come on.”

All I have to do to end this is call the whole thing off. But doing that meant losing, and she needed to win this now more than ever. That was why she followed Warren back out into the snowy night. It certainly wasn’t because she wasn’t willing to put an end to their night together. Nope. Not even a little bit.