Chapter Seven

Remy pressed the tip of his tongue to his upper lip as he worked the knitting needles and wool Celia had been kind enough to give him. Wyatt was visiting him in the small room that had become his home filling it with music. It otherwise felt empty now that Dane was gone. Not even Merida moving back in had helped. He’d cried when he’d woken to find the beta had left him while he’d slept. Not that he’d been surprised. The beta had no doubt thought that his leaving quietly would be easier on Remy. That just showed how even a beta could be dumb about some things. Not being able to say good-bye had been worse.

And I didn’t get a chance to talk him out of it.Remy surprised himself with such thoughts. It wasn’t his right to convince a dominant about anything, and he’d never contemplated such a rebellious thing in his life. There was something deep inside him that overrode his life-long training and natural reticence. That something might be the pup, except that he knew his desire and need for Dane had been there long before he’d been bred. Gods, I love him!

Remy dropped a stitch. “Darn. I’m not very good at this, but I have to do something for my new pack and my pup will need clothes.”

Wyatt stopped his strumming. “You’re better at it than I am. I worked in the harvesting and preservation of the food before the cold set in. Now, I can’t do anything,” he added in a soft voice.

Remy’s own concerns faded in an instant. “Does being here with me bother you?”

“No.” Wyatt shot him a smile. “I like being with you. You’re so…I don’t know.”

“What?”

“I don’t want to insult you, but you are the most uncomplicated shifter or human that I’ve ever met. Guileless, I’d say.”

Remy put his knitting on his lap and frowned. “I don’t know what that means.”

“It’s a good thing.”

“I’m not very smart.” Remy looked down, blinking away sudden tears.

“No!” Wyatt was next to him in an instant and wrapped his arm around his shoulder. “That’s not what I meant and you’re not dumb in any event. You’re simply open in your manner and see everything with a good heart. Being with you is kind of like sitting out on a warm, sunny day. It’s hard for me to feel bad when I’m visiting you.”

Remy sniffed back his tears. “Really? In my old pack, everyone used to get impatient and mad at me.”

“This is not your old pack. We love you here.”

Remy opened his mouth to thank Wyatt for saying so. He burst into tears instead.

Wyatt hugged him tightly as Remy cried out his misery as he’d never done before. He’d always been admonished by Merida to hide his sadness, and he’d tried to do so this time too. It wasn’t possible. The pain of losing Dane overwhelmed him.

“I want him back!”

“I know.” Wyatt rocked him as one might a pup, not trying to tell him he was being silly and to get over it.

Remy cried until there were no more tears left. Exhausted and disheartened, he lay his face on Wyatt’s shoulders. “My wolf keeps trying to call his and there’s no answer. It’s like Dane has gone far away.”

“I doubt that he has. He cares about you too much not to stay close enough to keep watch over you.”

“You think?” Remy didn’t dare hope so. “If he’s worried about me, I don’t understand why he can’t stay and be my mate. I know I’m only an omega, but it doesn’t make sense to me.”

“Nor to me. Not really. Kael told me that the old alpha was very cruel to all of his pups. I’m lucky to have escaped that. Dane has a lot of really bad memories of this place. I think it hurts him too much to be here and that’s overriding his desire to be with you.”

“We don’t have to live in the Strongblood compound.” Remy raised his head and slid aside to be able to look Wyatt in the eye. “If we were somewhere else, maybe it would be okay for him to mate with me.”

“Hmm. There are other packs you could live with because they have a treaty with the Strongbloods.” He frowned. “But not now. You can’t go anywhere while you’re breeding.”

“Why not?” Remy mentally kicked himself when the answer became evident in the next instant. Asking such a question of someone who had recently lost a pup had been cruel. He touched Wyatt’s knee. “I’m sorry. That was dumb of me.”

Wyatt shook his head. “No, it wasn’t. And I’m not saying you’d be risking your pup by traveling. It’s just that it’s cold and snow comes unexpectedly. The alpha would never allow it and I bet Dane wouldn’t, either.”

Remy grimaced. “If he’s so worried about me, he should be here to tell me what to do.” He placed his palm against his still flat abdomen. “My pup needs a sire.”

“Yes, it does. And so do you. Graydon won’t force anyone on you, but he won’t let you stay unmated for long. Maybe he’ll wait until after you’ve whelped and weened your pup. The pack will give you everything you need, so that’s not a concern. Eventually, though, you’ll go into heat again and someone will have to breed you.”

Alarm shot through Remy. “What? I thought maybe after this first time, I could…control it better. The sigmas do, don’t they?”

“They don’t breed as often because they’re sigmas. It’s built into their biology. We omegas are destined to produce lots of pups. That’s our job.”

“If my destiny is to bear a dominant’s pups, then I want Dane.” In his mind, he was screaming it. His voice was barely above a whisper, though. He knew he had to keep his thoughts quiet.

“I know. And I’m sorry. There are other dominants to choose from. Conan is a nice guy.”

Remy shook his head. “I don’t want him.” Being petulant wasn’t in his nature. Somehow, he couldn’t help himself when it came to his pup’s sire.

Wyatt patted his knee again. “You have time.” He moved to pick up his guitar.

Remy did the same with his knitting. As he busied his hands, his mind whirled with thoughts of Dane. An idea started to take shape, one that he had no right to contemplate. Still… “You said you ran away after Kael bred you. How did you manage that?”

“Why are you asking?” Wyatt’s voice held suspicion.

Remy shrugged. “No reason.” He didn’t dare look at the other boy.

“Hmm. Okay, I guess. I learned the sentries’ movements and avoided them. They’re supposed to keep others out, not pack members in. It was a dangerous thing for me to do, Remy. I was lucky that Dane tracked me and made sure I got home to my human parents safely.”

“I bet it was far away, though.” He didn’t intend to travel much of a distance at all.

“Pretty far, yes.” Wyatt stopped playing. “Don’t even think about leaving, Remy. We omegas aren’t meant to be on our own for any period of time, even when we’re not breeding.”

It took only a few seconds of deliberation within his own mind before he did something he’d never done before—he lied. “I won’t.” He gave Wyatt the best smile he could. “I promise.”

****

“This is a bit awkward, heh?”

Remy lifted his chin to look into the kindly face of the gamma, Conan. “I’m not really used to eating with the alpha and his family, either, if that’s what you mean, sir.” He couldn’t help blushing at the attention and dropped his gaze once more. With Dane gone, he’d assumed he would be relegated to one of the dining mats for unmated servients. Instead, he found himself seated next to Wyatt. For some reason, his presence eased the omega’s grief and the alpha, as well as Kael, was inclined to give the boy anything he wanted.

Conan smiled. “I mean our being seated together.”

The arrival of the gamma to sit by his side had surprised Remy, but not very much. It was obvious that everyone from Merida up to the alpha and his mate was trying to force a bond between him and the gamma. Although there were a few dominants for him to choose from as a future mate, it was obvious that Conan was the preferred choice of the pack. And if Remy weren’t in love with Dane, he would agree if only because he’d always done as expected of him.

Remy searched for something polite to say. “I’m honored by your interest, gamma.” He shoved a piece of meat in his mouth to give him an excuse to say nothing more. His words rang hollow to his own ears. How much worse did it sound to someone smarter than he?

Conan chuckled softly and leaned closer to him. “And I’m honored that the alpha trusts me with a breeding omega. It’s not a status most gammas would dream of obtaining.”

Remy heard the but in the shifter’s statement. He dared to look Conan in the eyes again and speak his mind. “You don’t want me.” His observation was made in a whisper, such was his fear that others would hear his insolence and punish him for it. Alpha Graydon might be kinder than his old alpha, but there had to be limits of conduct even here. He held his breath waiting for a response.

Conan’s kind expression eased his worry. “I wouldn’t put it that way, exactly. You are beautiful and sweet. Any unmated dominant would want you. It’s just that…” He shrugged. “You’re not my fated mate. We both know that and I was kind of hoping I could hold off on mating until I found her.” His gaze darted to the left where far across the room, Merida sat with other gammas.

As if Conan had called her name, Remy’s sister turned to look at them. She gave Remy a quick smile before returning her attention to her dining companions.

Remy eyes widened. “My sister?”

Conan’s cheeks reddened and he shrugged. Saying nothing more, the gamma concentrated on eating.

Relief washed over Remy and knowing that Conan wanted Merida and not him gave him the encouragement he needed to follow through on the scary plan forming in his mind that he couldn’t shake. If he ran away to Dane, he wouldn’t only be satisfying his own selfish desires. He would be helping his sister find a happiness that she deserved. Her whole life had been a struggle to find her place and to protect him. For once, he had a chance to do something for her.

A sudden sense of unease shot up his spine. He recognized the feeling because he’d felt it his entire life. Sensing when he’d attracted the unwanted attention and anger of a dominant had been necessary to help keep him out of trouble. He knew just where to look, too. When he lifted his gaze, the alpha was staring back at him. Remy had been the recipient of many furious glares. This time it was different. Alpha Graydon looked more pensive than mad. The feeling of dread that Remy had braced himself for didn’t arrive. Instead, he felt almost confident, as if the alpha were measuring his worth and finding him acceptable.

The moment passed quickly. In a matter of the span of a few breaths, the alpha turned to his mate to speak about something. Remy could almost believe he’d imagined the scrutiny. He slowly relaxed, secure in the knowledge that he wasn’t going to be punished and more convinced than ever that what he intended to do was the right thing.

The meal passed quickly with even Conan paying him little attention. When it was time to leave, Wyatt gave him a tight hug and whispered into his ear. “Forget what I said earlier. Follow your heart.”

Puzzled, yet happy with the advice, Remy couldn’t keep the smile off his face as he followed Merida back to their room. He shifted his nose briefly to inhale as he entered, the scent of Dane and the passion they’d shared still detectible to him despite the thorough cleaning sigmas had given it. At Merida’s sharp glance, he shifted back to his fully human face and sat meekly on his pallet. To give himself an air of obedience, he picked up his knitting.

Merida stood with her fists on her hips. “I have perimeter duty tonight.”

Remy kept his gaze on his needles as he tried not to drop a stitch. His sister knew him as no other did. “Yes, I remember.” He dared to glance at her. “I’ll be fine.”

She tapped one foot. “Hmm. You’re different.”

Alarm shot up his spine. Putting his knitting down, he palmed his abdomen. “I know. I’m breeding now. It wasn’t my idea,” he added, unable to keep some of the lingering resentment from bursting out. Besides, the sudden change in his life was a good topic to distract her from whatever she might be worrying about. She can’t possibly know what I’m planning.

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Then I don’t understand.” He played with the ball of yarn lying by his knee. “I’ve always tried to be an obedient boy. Have I done something wrong?” He tried to remain relaxed while waiting for the answer to a question he shouldn’t have asked. It was ingrained for him to learn from others what mistakes he’d made because he seemed to make so many. Life often perplexed him when all he wanted was to be happy and make others so as well. Only when he was with Dane did he finally feel truly right.

Merida sighed. “No. Of course not. You’re always a good boy, Remy. I only want what’s best for you, but our lives have changed so quickly, it’s hard to adjust.”

“It is for me, too. But this is better, isn’t it? Before was bad and dangerous. Now we’re safe. Aren’t we?”

Merida smiled, something she rarely did. “Yes. We’re safe and our lives are going to be not only better, but the best a shifter’s life can be. I have to go.” As she reached the doorway, she turned to look at him from over her shoulder. “Be careful, Remy.”

He blinked rapidly at her. “I always try to be, just as you taught me.” He tried for his own smile, once more having an uneasy feeling that his sister knew what he was going to do. No way. She would never let me leave.

Merida left without another word. Remy sat with his knitting in his lap. He tried to occupy his time by picking it up again, but he simply couldn’t concentrate. Instead, he lay down and let images of Dane and the passion they’d shared dance in his head. He wasn’t surprised, not now that he understood the workings of his body when he became aroused. He touched his dick briefly but dropped his hand again. That part of him, like every other, belonged to Dane. Waiting for the beta to pleasure him was the right thing to do. Plus, there was something nice about leaving the arousal to build.

When he judged he’d waited long enough, Remy stood and taking a deep breath in and letting it out slowly, he summoned the courage to leave. He crept slowly through the longhouse, not daring to use a lantern. He’d learned enough about the lay-out of the building to feel his way along the corridor as he headed for the nearest exit. It was a good thing that he and Merida were both newcomers and relatively low in the pack hierarchy because it meant their room was closer to the back.

At each turn, he stopped and listened and sniffed to detect anyone else around. Encountering no one, his last careful step was to glance around outside before stepping through the doorway. Bitter cold iced his skin immediately. He wasted no time in shifting to his warm fur. The night was moonless, a boon that he hadn’t been aware of. He’d spent a lot of time considering whether it made sense to leave on a night when Merida was acting as a sentry. On the one hand, it meant he could be sure she wouldn’t be in the room. On the other, no one else was more likely to scent him than his sister. In the end, it made more sense to flee when she was going to be unaware of his leaving until morning. No doubt, the alpha would send her or others to fetch him once they realized he’d gone. He could only hope that a night with him would change Dane’s mind about the two of them. He had to at least try.

Remy had never been out on his own. Not really. Merida had left him for short amounts of time to hunt game for them, but this was different. He crept slowly into the woods, using his ears and nose to detect danger as she’d taught him. Not knowing anything of how sentries worked, he kept scanning for dominants in all directions. He remembered the path they’d taken to get to the compound from Dane’s den, so it was easy to retrace his steps. It was slow going because he slid along the brush and hid behind trees as much as possible. There were no sounds other than those of the forest at nighttime. And no shifter-like shapes loomed in the darkness. Still, his heart tripped so fast, it felt as if it would pop right out and he panted despite the easy pace.

Once he was sure he’d passed the perimeter of the Strongblood lands, he straightened to his full height and raced toward Dane’s den. With his short legs, he worried it would take too long to reach his destination. He had to arrive before dawn to give himself a chance to seduce Dane and make him realize they were fated to be together. Such boldness was new to him, yet his love for the beta overrode all other training and emotions. It was as if he’d taken on some of the dominant’s strength.

By the time reached his destination, he was exhausted and it had started to snow. Fat flakes landed on him and stuck to his fur. He shook them off as he sat to regain his energy and gather up the courage to go inside the cave. On legs shaky from fatigue and nervousness, he walked over to the dark hole in the steep rock before him. Before he arrived, however, a towering figure bolted out. Remy stopped in mid-stride, excited and fearful in equal measure.

A magnificent Dane stood with legs braced and a thunderous scowl on his face. His cock was fully aroused, glistening even with flakes starting to gather on it. If Dane felt the cold, he didn’t show it. His erection didn’t flag and he didn’t flinch as his skin started to drip with melted snow. The same could not be said for Remy as he shifted in order to speak his mind. He started shivering immediately, although it wasn’t only from the cold. Now that he’d arrived, he feared he wouldn’t be welcome after all.

“Remy! What are you doing here?” The beta whipped his head around. “Are you alone?”

Remy could only nod in response. There was so much he wanted to say, yet the words wouldn’t form on his tongue.

“Of course, you are,” Dane muttered. He gave Remy a hard stare. “You ran away.” It wasn’t a question. “How did Graydon let this happen? How did your sister…or any of them, for that matter? Keeping one little breeding omega safely in the longhouse shouldn’t be so hard. What were you thinking?” This last question came out nearly in a roar.

Remy took one frightened step back before stopping himself. This was Dane. He wasn’t afraid of the beta. So he planted his feet just as firmly and ignored the cold. The words finally started to tumble out of his mouth.

“I missed you! I love you. How can a beta be so dumb as to not know that?” He caught his breath at his audacity and nearly apologized before stiffening his resolve as much as his muscles. “If you send me back now, I’ll only find a way to return. No matter where you are,” he added with the sudden fear the Dane would simply run away to avoid him. “I only want a little time with you. Please.”

Snowflakes settled on Remy’s lashes and turned Dane’s hair white as the beta stood for long seconds saying nothing.

Then the beta rushed forward and gathered Remy up in a hug with a speed that left him breathless. “You foolish, foolish boy. What in the name of all the Gods are you doing here? Never mind. Let’s get you inside before you freeze to death.” With that, Dane lifted him in his strong arms, the heat of his massive body engulfing Remy.

It wasn’t exactly the declaration of love that Remy dreamed of, but he would take what he could get. He clung to Dane’s broad shoulders, laying his head in the crook of the man’s neck as the he carried him out of the cold and into the warmth.