Chapter 21

Sadie

T hat night, I slept like garbage. While Keelan had made my body feel incredible, the mere mention of Patrick dug a thorn of unease and sadness into my heart. He had been dead for well over a year, and while I had moved on from grief, his name still twisted me. He was an awful bully toward me when we were kids, but that was primarily because of my father. Patrick wanted to have Dad’s approval when it came to software coding. He tried everything to keep the praise solely on him, which resulted in him tormenting me. Our father’s desire for the perfect copy of himself left a lasting scar on my brother. Even as adults, Patrick and I had a cordial relationship at best.

I wanted to love my older brother, but the rift was too great.

Growing up, I often had intense, vivid dreams that woke me from nightmares in a cold sweat. I was absolutely certain that something was watching me from the closet. Those dreams kept me up for hours, and my mother, bless her damaged heart, didn’t know how to console me. Dad would scream at me to go back to sleep and stop embarrassing him in front of the household staff.

I often wondered if my mind was trying to process the reality of being a part of a fucked-up criminal family, where the father beat his children and wife at every slight or imagined transgression against his image. But instead of escaping to someplace safe, the dreams would only drag me into a deeper hell. When I turned twenty-one and Keelan and I started hooking up, the dreams seemed to subside, and I could finally sleep through the night.

However, tonight was different. I wasn’t dreaming of something dark and frightening that I didn’t recognize. It was a memory, something I had long forgotten about—an unpleasant one.

“Why did you invite him, Patrick?” my ten-year-old self snapped. “Keelan hates me!”

Patrick smirked, his brown eyes glittering with mischief. “Everyone hates you.”

My mouth gaped.

Jerk!

I walked over to the oldest tree in the Ironwood Cemetery and plopped down on the browning grass. I crossed my arms and glared as my brother’s best friend walked through the front gate and headed toward us. Keelan Blake was Patrick’s age, just months away from turning thirteen. He wore a blue T-shirt, black shorts, and checkered sneakers for our adventure.

“Hey,” Keelan said, but I wouldn’t look at him. Instead, I picked up a nearby stick and started drawing shapes in the soil. But ants were nearby, so I dropped the stick and jumped up, brushing the bottom of my jeans .

Patrick smiled and started rooting around the dark gray backpack, pulling out an old instant camera. “This was all I could find in the house. I think it’s our mom’s, but she won’t notice it’s gone.”

Keelan turned his head to look at me and grinned, showing all his teeth. “Are you scared, Sade?” he asked, gesturing to the gloomy cemetery grounds. “I heard a ghost come out just now. We can catch it with that camera.”

I scrunched my nose at him and stuck my tongue out. He was trying to scare me, but it wouldn’t work. It was just after sunset, and the wind shook the nearby palm trees. It was a creepy place, but nothing as scary as my house.

“Is Gavin coming?” I asked. Even though Gavin was Keelan’s cousin, he didn’t pick on me like Keelan and his brothers did. His presence would be welcome while I was with these two assholes.

“Naw,” Keelan replied, picking up my discarded stick. “He’s out of town with his family for the weekend. Looks like you don’t have your little savior tonight.”

Was he threatening me?

Of course, he was. He was Keelan Blake.

“Alright, let’s go,” Patrick said. “We can snap some photos over by the older crypts. But we gotta be fast since the cemetery’s security will show up soon.”

We started walking north toward some of the larger crypts and mausoleums. It was darker now, and despite the nearby roads, it was eerily quiet. My skin prickled.

“Boo!” Keelan shouted, startling me. I immediately punched him hard in the arm, which hurt me more than him.

“You asshole,” I cursed. Patrick snickered from up ahead.

Keelan grinned and wagged his finger at me. “Careful, Sade, or you’ll get in trouble with your mommy. Since when does the precious Sadie Ryan cuss?”

I wanted to go home already.

Ignoring Keelan’s teasing, I pushed past the boys, pretending that none of this bothered me. After a few minutes, we reached the area with the most crypts and mausoleums. “This looks like a good place to take a photo,” I said, pointing to a tombstone ten feet ahead. I noticed a new grave dug just one row down, with a pile of dirt beside it. We moved closer and read the name on the newly carved headstone.

“Randall J. Plumperdink,” Keelan read, and the three of us snickered.

“Man, his parents must have hated him.” Patrick laughed before snapping a photo of the tombstone. He wandered away to look at the plaques adorning a marble crypt nearby.

“I dare you to jump in the hole, Sadie,” Keelan challenged.

I quickly shook my head. “You’re crazy, Kee,” I said, glancing down the hole. It was pretty deep, and if I went in, I wouldn’t be able to climb back out.

“Come on. I’ll help pull you back out. Don’t be chicken,” Keelan teased as he moved to stand next to the dead man’s headstone. I walked closer to the dates on the stone. Randall was thirty-five years old and died two weeks ago.

Man, that’s gotta suck.

Keelan went over to the grave next to the empty hole and started sorting through the bouquet of flowers someone had left in the small plastic holder. Despite the urge to scold him, I decided it was better to ignore him. Instead, I went to the back of the headstone, leaned against the cool stone, folded my arms on top, and put my chin on my wrist.

I stared out at the dark cemetery, wondering when Keelan would head back over to me.

“Here,” he said. I looked to my left, and Keelan was holding out a single flower in his hand. Even in the gloom, I could see distinctive heart-shaped blossoms in a shade of pink that I loved.

“A bleeding heart flower,” I marveled. “Did you take this from someone’s grave? Won’t that make their ghost haunt you?”

Keelan shrugged. “Patrick told me that you guys were dealing with some bullshit this past week with your parents. Thought you’d like this since pink is your favorite color.”

I was stunned. Since when had Keelan ever been this nice to me? My current tally was … zero. Despite that, I reached out and took the flower, appreciating its simple but beautiful shape. I snuck a look at Keelan’s face, expecting him to make some kind of snide remark or insult me again. But he just looked at me with an almost uncomfortable expression.

“Hey guys, look at me and smile,” Patrick said. We both looked up and smiled while holding peace signs. The flash left spots in my eyes, and I rubbed them to clear them away. When I looked back at Keelan, the strange expression was gone, and he was back, grinning like a cat that had caught a mouse.

“Come on. Jump into the hole, you chicken,” Keelan prodded again.

I turned and sneered at him. “Jump in yourself, dick,” I said, but my quip didn’t hold much weight. Keelan was already five-foot-ten and bigger than the other kids. Climbing out of the grave would be easy for him. “I don’t trust you two to help me if I can’t get out. You’ll just leave me in there.”

Already annoyed with being so close to him, I marched away from Keelan, but he reached out to grab me, and I flinched away.

“That’s right, Sadie. Run away, you big scaredy-cat. We don’t want a dumb, worthless girl like you here, anyway.”

My body froze in anger, and tears stung the back of my eyes. I clenched my fists and turned around to look at Keelan. His handsome face lit up with malice, and he grinned wickedly. He had never called me “worthless” before, and that hurt more than I thought it would.

“Damn, Keelan, that was harsh,” Patrick said while laughing.

My nostrils flared at the two boys, but I kept staring at Keelan. “Why are you always so mean to me?” I asked. “Actually, never mind. Your dad is Arthur Blake. You’re all a bunch of psychos.”

“Jesus, Sadie!” Patrick shouted. His expression was a clear warning to shut the hell up.

Good thing our father wasn’t here. I wouldn’t be able to walk for a week.

Keelan stormed over to me and grabbed my arm, squeezing so tight that his nails dug into my skin. “Watch your mouth, you little brat. God, you’re such a fucking princess, aren’t you? No wonder you don’t have any friends. Go home, Sadie. Find someone else who actually wants you around, although I doubt anyone does. Even your own family doesn’t want you.”

The tears came then, staining my cheeks. I wanted to punch him in his stupid face, but my father wouldn’t like that. He would punish me worse than Keelan ever could. Instead, I yanked my arm free and walked away from the grave .

“Fine!” I yelled, throwing the bleeding heart flower that he had given me on the ground. “But fuck you, Keelan.” I turned to my brother, who had a weird look on his face. “And fuck you, too!”