15. Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Fifteen

Quinn

I was busy in the bakery kitchen the next day, intent on filling some of the smaller orders before getting a start on the brunch order for The Sinclair Foundation. I had four days, but some of the items I could do ahead of time, and some would be better the day before. The quantities were large, so I needed to plan enough time to get everything accomplished.

I had no idea what time it was. I was in my zone, icing about the two hundredth Christmas cookie, when Josh came in carrying a bag. My nose sniffed in pleasure at the aroma, and my stomach grumbled loudly.

Josh laughed at the sound, before dropping the bag onto one of the available surfaces.

"What's that?" I nodded my head towards the bag, glancing at the clock on the wall. How was it three in the afternoon already? Seemed like I'd just got here at four this morning.

"This is what we mere mortals call food. Lunch specifically, or early dinner?" He shrugged. "Special delivery with your name on it."

I put down the bag of red royal icing I was holding. I shook out my hands, feeling them tingle. "I didn't order anything. "

He shrugged again. "It's got your name on it, dude. Maybe someone knows you forget to eat when you are in your zone."

My stomach rumbled again, letting me know I'd neglected it long enough. I opened the bag, inhaling the scents of Chinese food. I pulled out a steaming container of egg drop soup, a package containing four eggrolls, and a huge container of chicken fried rice. All my favorites from my favorite Chinese restaurant.

This had Wade written all over it. He knew the sad reality that I tended to forget to eat when I was baking, especially this time of year. I pulled my phone out and dialed his number. Biting into an eggroll, my eyes closed in bliss as the flavors hit my tongue. The pork, cabbage, and other veggies were just what I'd been craving.

"Best friend for life, how can I help you?" Wade's voice echoed in my ear, cheery and over the top, and what I would expect from him. I swallowed the scrumptious bite I'd been chewing. This place had the best egg rolls. Ever.

"Thanks for the food," I mumbled around another bite.

Now that I'd smelled food, and taken a bite, I was starving. Like STARVING in all caps. I wanted to sit down and eat myself into a food coma.

"I have no clue what you're talking about."

"Don't play coy, it's so not you." I dipped the end of my egg roll in the sweet and sour sauce. "Seriously, thanks. I've been so busy I didn't realize I hadn't eaten all day."

"Hold that thought." I heard some shuffling, then a quietly whispered, "Did you send food to Quinn?"

I couldn't hear the reply through the phone, even my ears weren't that good. But I'd recognize the low timber of Lachlan's voice anywhere. I ignored the flutter in my stomach and the rush of heat that ran through me. It was probably my body's response to having not eaten all day. Low blood sugar or something.

I hadn't seen Lachlan since Sunday night, and it was only Monday. The sound of his voice, even muffled through a phone, shouldn't be sending all my nerves tingling. My cat purred, and I shushed him.

I heard more shuffling, then Wade's clear voice sounding annoyed and full of unanswered questions. "Yeah, that wasn't me. That was my insane boss. Suddenly the ‘let's play twenty questions about Quinn' game we were playing last week makes all kinds of sense. I just figured the man was after your baked goods."

I sighed, trying to act annoyed at Lachlan. Secretly I was pleased and excited that Lachlan had been asking Wade about me. The food from my favorite restaurant also earned him a couple of brownie points.

I bit into my second egg roll, listening as Wade rambled, "He's like, obsessed with you. It's a little creepy. Should I call him off?" His voice had trailed to a conspirator whisper. "Seriously, give me the word and I'll shut him down."

If he didn't sound so serious and unnerved, I might have laughed. "He's okay, I guess."

I'd never had anyone send me food before. Or ply my best friend with questions to learn my favorite food and restaurant. It was sweet. A little stalkerish, but sweet.

"That's all you have to say?" Wade gasped, and I could imagine his hand over his heart. "What is happening right now? Who are you? And what is going on between you and my tall, dark, and oh-so-fuckable boss? Not that I would. Fuck him, I mean. But, you know, he is hot."

"What?" I mumbled, grabbing a fork and digging into the fried rice. I really wanted the soup, but it was steaming hot, so I'd save it for later .

"Don't you ‘what' me, Quinn Rafferty," Wade hissed. "What is going on? Stop being weird. First Lachlan, and now you. It's too much weirdness that I'm not involved in, and I won't have it." The sound of a stomping foot echoed in my ear.

I rolled my eyes. I loved Wade, but he was so extra sometimes.

"Don't you roll your eyes at me," he wheezed.

How the fuck did he know that?

"I know you, that's how. I know you're rolling your eyes. You came out of the womb rolling your eyes. I will ask again. What. In. The. Actual. Fuck. Is. Going. On?"

"Wow," I said around my bite of rice, trying hard not to accidentally suck a piece into my lungs. "Even for you that was a lot."

"Quinn!" he yelled into my ear, and I could tell by his tone that he was done playing, and wanted some actual answers.

"I swear to God, if you don't tell me what is going on, I'm going to report Lachlan as a creepy stalker, and watch the police take him out of here in cuffs."

"You are the most ridiculous person I know." I had a flash of a naked Lachlan in handcuffs, bound to my bed. Heat rushed through my body so fast I almost dropped my carton of food.

I needed to talk to someone about all these…. feelings I was having, and Wade was my best friend.

Wade might change his hair color every week, and wear ridiculous t-shirts with crazy sayings on them. He was most definitely over the top and extra, all the time, but he was also loyal and really freaking smart. I knew without a doubt, that no matter what came out of my mouth, he would never judge me. He'd always had my back.

"Can you go somewhere to talk?" I asked him, glancing towards the swinging doors of the kitchen. It was quiet out front, as it should be since we usually closed at three in the afternoon. Josh was going to try to get a couple of hours of sleep and come in later tonight to work on more orders. We were essentially tag-teaming, and catching sleep where we could this week, or that was the plan. We'd see how well it went.

Regardless, I knew my conversation with Wade would involve a lot of gasping, shouting, and dramatics from him, and I didn't want Lachlan to hear any of it.

"Someplace that Lachlan can't hear you?" I said, sinking gratefully into one of the chairs at the table. I sighed, feeling all the effects of being up since two a.m. and standing on my feet all day, hit me like a brick wall. I shouldn't have sat. Sitting was bad. I might not get up again for hours.

"I…" Wade paused, then followed it with a quiet, "yes. Hold on."

I listened to the muffled sounds of him walking, then heard the snick of a door closing softly.

"Okay, I'm alone. Why is Lachlan sending you food? And asking me a million questions about you?"

What was I ready to tell him? How much?

I needed to talk to someone about the big subject I'd been doing my best to ignore. All these crazy feelings and emotions I was having. I felt like I was all over the place, and I was making myself dizzy with it.

"Do you believe in fated mates?" I finally asked.

"You know I do, you dipshit. We've talked about this like a zillion and one times, and you always tell me that I'm nuts."

I did do that. Wade believed in all the romantic bullshit in the movies, and I… well…didn't.

"I think Lachlan might be – is – my fated mate." It felt odd finally saying the words out loud, but in a way, it was a relief. I waited for the explosion I was sure was going to follow my confession, and was slightly disappointed when all I heard was silence on the other end of the phone .

Crickets.

"Wade?" I'd never experienced Wade speechless before, and it was terrifying.

"Are you having a stroke?" His shrill voice was an octave higher than normal. "Should I call someone? Because it sounded like you said Lachlan Sinclair is your fated mate."

"Yeah, took me by surprise, too. You're the first person I've said it out loud to."

"Wait, you and Lach haven't talked about it? Not that I'm not happy to be the first," he muttered. "I have so many questions. Sooo many."

"I wouldn't talk about it. With him. Or, at all. I wouldn't say it out loud," I admitted.

I was a coward. I don't know what I thought was going to happen when I did say the words out loud. Whatever I had imagined, nothing earth-shattering changed in my world. It was all very anticlimactic.

"You need to catch me up here, Quinn." Wade was serious. "What happened between him pissing you off to the point of kicking him out of your bakery, to you discovering you're fated mates? I need details!"

That last part was the Wade I knew and loved. I let out a relieved breath. I'd thought I'd broken him.

I caught him up. I told him about Lachlan's apology, to the meeting about the brunch that had ended up with us having sex. I left out most of the intimate details I would have normally shared with him, but he didn't seem to mind this time. I didn't think he'd really want to know that his boss had a master's degree in rimming. Or, that he liked being held down. Or, that I'd popped his knot cherry. Some things were better left not shared, even between the best of friends.

I didn't feel right about sharing sex details with him. There was something so intimate between what was going on with Lachlan and me, and I wanted to keep that part of it private. To myself. It was all mine, and not for anyone else to know.

I couldn't explain this feeling, it wasn't anything I had encountered before, but it was there. It was time I started admitting it.

I told Wade about our dinner date, running into Leo and his very pregnant omega. That earned me the correct amount of reaction from Wade.

He'd hated Leo from the beginning, didn't know why I was even wasting my time with him, since I didn't want to be tied down to an alpha anyway. Especially when Leo had been all about tying me down (and not in the way I liked), from the get-go.

Yeah, Leo was a mistake I wished I'd never made, or wasted my time on, but live and learn.

Honestly, I'd been bored and horny, and I'd let it go on too long. Especially for mediocre, unfulfilling sex. There had been a small part of me that had liked the feeling of being with someone, that someone had wanted me for more than a night. Because no one ever had before. I'd loved that feeling more than I'd ever loved Leo. Or, thought I'd loved him. What I'd felt for him hadn't been love.

I told Wade about tossing Lachlan out of my bed, him showing back up with donuts, and taking him to meet Gigi. That had gotten another over-the-top gasp from Wade.

"You did not wake him up and tell him he had to go. Oh, my Gawd! Quinn! I'm dying here. I can just picture his face! I bet he was pissed! Because I would have been hella salty if some alpha hole did that to me. There would have been hell to pay."

"I had shifted in my sleep, and it freaked me out. He was stroking my fur, and it was really nice. I got freaked out."

"Let's circle back to the fated mates thing. Can he smell you? Even with your birth control? "

Omega birth control, while stopping our heats, also muted our natural scent. Most people, most alphas, would barely be able to smell an omega who used birth control. But Lachlan had smelled me.

"Yes, he most definitely smelled me. Strongly."

"Holy shit!" Wade gasped.

"There's more." I hesitated, even bit my lower lip a little, nibbling. It was a bad habit of mine, and I only did it when nervous, or extremely stressed. I was both right now.

"I'm not sure I can take any more, but I never want this conversation to end."

I rolled my eyes at him again, not even caring he couldn't see me. "I…so…umm…"

"Quinn, I've never heard you like this before. Do I need to come over there? Are you all right?" He sounded truly worried about me. I rubbed a hand through my hair. I didn't blame him. I was a little worried about me, too. I was finally going to admit to certain things I'd ignored, and I was going to say the words out loud.

Out loud made them real in a bigger way. I took a deep breath, and just started rambling. I needed to get the words out fast or I wouldn't be able to get them out at all.

"Not only could he smell me, but I wanted him. Like my ass gushed slick, and I wanted to tear his clothes fucking off him and climb him like a tree. I did climb him like a tree. I climbed him and licked him, and lost my fucking mind over him. I was burning up, and so fucking wet, and I couldn't get enough of him, and I came so hard, and so many times, and I wanted his knot and I wanted him to claim me. Bite my gland and make me his mate."

Fuck not telling him the intimate details. I took some ragged gulps of oxygen, trying to fill my lungs back up. I was pretty sure I hadn't breathed through all those words spilling out of me. I waited for Wade to say something , but it was back to crickets.

"Say something!" I shouted into the phone.

"I'm trying to not picture Lachlan naked in any of that." Wade made a gagging noise in the back of his throat. "I mean he's hot, don't get me wrong. All the Sinclairs are, but he's my boss. My boss. Ick. But, then I'm like damn, that's super hawt, and I'm fanning myself over here. Then I remember you're talking about Lachlan , and I'm back to ick. Then I'm like shit , Quinn has a fated mate , and wow! Quinn, of all people, who doesn't believe in any of this. And hey, I might get to be an uncle someday. That was a lot to process."

"Tell me about it," I rubbed at my temples, where a stress headache, or a tired headache, or a Wade headache, was forming. I sorted through his words and landed on the one that terrified me the most. "And, no you will not be an uncle someday. Not happening. No babies for me," I hissed.

I mean I liked kids, don't get me wrong. They were cute, for the most part, when they weren't shrieking their heads off in a grocery store, five aisles away, making my back molars hurt. I just knew, without a doubt, I didn't want any. I'd never felt the need to have any. Ever. I shuddered. That's why I was on birth control. I liked sex a whole hell of a lot more than I liked kids. I knew omegas were supposed to want kids, it was in their nature, but it was never something I'd craved. Not even when we'd been kids, and Wade had insisted we played house. I was more than happy to let him carry the baby doll around, and pretend to take care of it.

"Hmmm." Wade hummed, and I could picture his finger tapping his lip. "About that."

I scowled, even though he couldn't see my face. He'd known I'd rolled my eyes, so I was hoping he could feel my scowl. "About what? "

"You do know Lachlan wants kids, right? I mean that man's biological clock is ticking. Loudly. Between his age, and his mom, the pressure is on for him. He's expected to keep the Sinclair line going."

I gulped. Well…that was unfortunate news.

It was way too soon in our…relationship to talk about kids. He hadn't said a word about them when Gigi had pulled her nonsense yesterday. That would have been a perfect opportunity for us to have had that discussion.

"He's got three brothers that can carry on the line," I pointed out. "Let one of them procreate."

"Hmmm," Wade said again, and it was starting to irk me.

Yes, he knew a lot about Lachlan, more than me. Yes, he was privileged to some of the workings of the Sinclair inner circle, but enough with the hmmming.

"What does that mean?" I demanded, putting as much irritation in my voice as I could.

"Well, let's just say Brendan likes being called Daddy, but not by any offspring. Finn is never going to find anyone with that stick up his ass and his personality. And, Jamie, well, he's the baby so he gets let off the hook for most anything. Nope, all eyes are staring at Lachlan for the first round of grandbabies, and soon. And he loves kids. I mean he loves loves them. Anytime anyone brings their babies to the office, he's first in line to hold them. I know he doesn't want to be having kids when he's fifty."

"Fifty?" I muttered. "He's only thirty-eight for fuck's sake. He doesn't have one foot in the grave."

Not that fifty was old. Fuck, I'd seen some men I wouldn't mind calling Daddy a few times. If I was into calling anyone Daddy, which I wasn't. Didn't stop me from saying "Hello Daddy" to myself, when I saw a silver fox out at a store .

"Regardless of the reason, he really does want kids. Soon." Wade's voice had taken a quiet tone. "We've talked about it a lot. I'm sorry, Quinn. You guys should probably talk about this. Figure out if it's a deal-breaker for either one of you."

Was it? A deal-breaker? I'd thought the "Is ‘Die Hard' a Christmas movie?" question was a deal-breaker. This was so much bigger and more serious than that.

I'd never given it much thought before. I didn't want kids, and for me, that was the end of the conversation. At least the conversation I'd had in my head, with any pretend or potential partner. It had been easy when I had planned on not ever settling down. And Leo and I had never managed to get around to the kid conversation in the eight months we'd been together.

But now? Now I had a fated mate, who – unbeknownst to me – wanted children and probably quickly. I should walk away now before we went any further. Got more attached. No harm, no foul. I didn't begrudge anyone who wanted children, a family. I just knew I wasn't one of those people.

The thought of walking away from Lachlan, of this coming between us, made my stomach turn. I felt myself break out into a sweat, my breathing picking up. I had to clamp a hand over my mouth, as bile threatened to spew from my churning stomach.

I didn't want to walk away from him. I didn't want to not see where this thing between us was going. I wanted him like I'd never, ever wanted anyone in my life. Like I never imagined I could, or would want anyone, and it exhilarated and terrified me.

I swallowed hard, pushing my nausea down. Exhaustion rolled over me, and I just wanted to get off the phone, and curl up and sleep. I was bone-tired, my stomach sick. My heart hurt, knowing Lachlan wanted something desperately, that I didn't want .

"I need to go," I whispered to Wade, blinking my eyes when I felt them burn with tears. What the fuck was wrong with me? I never cried, and I certainly didn't cry over an alpha.

"Quinn, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have told you that." Wade was as quiet as I was, and that was never a good thing. "It wasn't my place to tell you. Fuck."

"No, it's okay," I said honestly. "I needed to hear it. Lachlan and I need to talk. I need to go, the oven dinged," I lied, but I hung up anyway. I sat for a minute, no longer hungry, my stomach twisting and turning, and throwing a fit. I'd save the leftovers and eat them later when I felt better.

I needed to thank Lachlan for the food. My throat was tight, as I dialed his cell number. I could have called his office, but I knew I'd have to go through Wade to get to him, and I just couldn't deal with it right now.

"Did you eat?"

I closed my eyes against the wave of longing, and lust, that swept through me, just hearing his voice.

"I did, thank you. It was very thoughtful of you." I tried to sound cheerful, but my voice sounded wooden and lifeless to my ears.

"What's wrong?" he demanded. "You sound weird. Was it too much? Too soon?"

"Nothing's wrong," I lied, hearing the anxiousness that had crept into his tone. "I'm just exhausted, and it's only Monday. This week is going to be crazy. I zoned out and forgot to eat, so I really appreciate the food."

He was silent, probably trying to tell if I was lying. "I asked Wade a lot of questions about you last week."

I laughed a little. "Yeah, he said."

"Now that I hear myself say it out loud, it sounds creepy and slightly stalkerish. "

"Naw, it's cool." I waved it off. "I've never had anyone send me food before." My voice had taken on a soft quality to it. "It was nice."

"I worry about you." His tone was just as soft, and held something in it, that made me go all gooey inside.

"I just had this feeling you were hungry." He laughed. "Now that does sound creepy. I can't explain it, but I wanted to do it, so I did. I know we won't see each other until Friday when you bring the delivery. I wanted you to know you're on my mind. I like you, Quinn. I like you a lot. I want to keep seeing you."

I took a deep breath and dove in headfirst. "About Friday? When we deliver the brunch, do you think you can spare a few minutes?"

Then I said the words no one in a relationship ever wants to hear.

Never. Ever. Ever.

But before we went any further with this thing between us, it needed to happen.

"We need to talk."