11. Jaxson

The morning sun hadn’t cast its warm glow over the room when I stirred awake. Emilia hadn’t woken yet for her morning bottle, and I would have been alarmed if Rhys hadn’t slipped out of bed about three a.m. to give her a bottle. He thought I didn’t know, but I’d heard him over the baby monitor talking sweetly to her.

A smile crept across my face as the comforting weight of Rhys pressed beside me, his presence like an anchor. I was floored by the feeling of contentment and emotions I felt for him swelling in my chest.

Rhys stirred slightly, his eyes fluttering open as he caught my gaze. A sleepy smile graced his lips as he blinked those beautiful green eyes at me. He looked at me with such adoration and, dare I say, deep affection. In that moment, everything felt perfect, as if the world outside didn’t exist, and it was just the two of us against the universe.

I lifted my hand and sifted my fingers through his dark hair. It was thick, but silky, and brought back memories of our first time together. The sounds he made as I took him the first time. The slide of our bodies together as we made love. It was perfect.

Even with the sense of certainty and contentment filling me, my gut instincts were never wrong. There was this persistent nagging doubt in my mind, a quiet voice that refused to be ignored. I could feel a distance between Rhys and I. It was evident in the way he sometimes avoided eye contact and he hesitated before speaking. There was something he felt like he couldn’t say and I’d glimpsed it in those beautifully guarded eyes.

I wanted to ignore it, to bury my fears beneath layers of denial, but they gnawed at me relentlessly, refusing to be ignored. And so, as we lay there together in the quiet of the morning, I found myself unable to resist the urge to confront the growing thing that seemed to linger between us.

“Good morning,” I murmured softly, my hand drifting down to his stubbled cheek. His eye stayed fixed on me as I stroked my thumb back and forth. “Thank you for taking care of Emilia last night.”

His sleepy eyes filled with happiness. “I love taking care of her. And you needed the sleep.”

Rhys studied me a moment, then looked at quizzically. “What’s wrong?”

I smiled and nodded. “Nothing at all. But I have a feeling something might be bothering you. Is everything alright?”

He hesitated for a moment, his expression flickering with something unreadable before he forced a smile. “Of course. Why do you ask?”

I bit my lip; the words lingering on the tip of my tongue. What if I asked, and I ended up pushing him away? Maybe he just wasn’t ready to share. Or what if it was something he couldn’t share? Shit, why hadn’t I thought of that?

“Are you a criminal?” I blurted out, the words tumbling from my lips before I could stop them.

Rhys blinked in surprise, his brows furrowing in confusion before he burst into laughter. “A criminal? Where on earth did that come from?”

I flushed, heat rising in my cheeks as I fumbled for an explanation. “I don’t know... I just... I’ve been feeling like... like there’s something you’re not telling me, and I... I guess I let my imagination run wild.”

Rhys sobered, but still he reached out, gently smoothing away the frown lines between my eyes as he studied me with an expression that was equal parts amusement and affection. “You have quite the imagination. But I promise you, there’s nothing sinister lurking in my past.”

I nodded, relief flooding through me like a tidal wave as I buried my face in the crook of his neck, inhaling the scent of him as if trying to imprint it in my memory forever.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, my voice muffled against his skin. “I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions like that.”

Rhys chuckled softly, his arms tightening around me in a reassuring embrace. “It’s alright, Jaxson. We all have our moments of doubt. Trust me, it’s nothing the FBI will break down the door for. I promise. You don’t need to worry about me. I’m right here, where I belong.”

That sounded just perfect.

As I lay wrapped in his arms, I wanted to let it go. I wanted to hold on to everything else, to push aside the doubt and relish in the rightness of this moment. But the seeds had been planted. He said it was nothing, which means there was something.

The air between us shifted, heavy with unspoken words as I dared to voice the doubts that had been gnawing at me for far too long.

“Rhys,” I began, my voice tentative yet firm. “But there’s something you’re not telling me, isn’t there?”

His expression flickered, a brief flash of hesitation crossing his features. He pulled away and shifted to sit up in the bed. The sheets were tangled around his body, so as he sat up, they pooled low on his hips. Like me, he was sporting some morning wood, but this wasn’t the time to address it.

So I did the same and reclined next to him. When we were settled, I bumped my shoulder into his, conveying I was ready and here for him.

“I... yeah,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “There is.”

My heart clenched at his confession, a whirlwind of emotions swirling within me as I struggled to process his words. Part of me wanted to demand answers, to unravel the mystery that lay between us, but another part recognized the vulnerability in his admission, the fragile trust he placed in me by sharing even just that.

“Please believe I want to tell you,” Rhys blew out a breath, “but I’m not ready to talk about it yet.” His voice was heavy with a weight I couldn’t quite understand. “But I promise, when the time is right, I’ll tell you everything.”

That wasn’t what I was expecting. “Are you sure everything is okay?”

“Yes, I promise. There are some things about my family that I’m not quite ready to share yet. They can be a lot. Especially my brothers. I don’t want to scare you off.”

I nodded, the tension in my chest easing ever so slightly at his words. “I’ll wait,” I murmured, reaching out to intertwine my fingers with his. “Whatever you need.”

A small smile tugged at the corners of his lips, gratitude shining in his eyes as he squeezed my hand. “Thank you. You have no idea what that means to me.”

I leaned closer and brushed a gentle kiss against his cheek, my heart swelling with emotion as I nestled closer to him.

“But,” I added, unable to resist the urge to lighten the mood, “just so you know, I have my limits. I’ll only tolerate up to three murders, but four is a deal breaker.”

Rhys chuckled, the sound echoing through the room. I decided to take a leap of faith and trust him when he said he would tell me, and it wasn’t anything that bad.

“Got it,” he teased, pressing a soft kiss to my forehead. “No more than three. I’ll do my best to behave.”

His fingers squeezed mine, our arms entwined as he rested his head on my shoulder. As I gazed at his hand in mine, I chose to be filled with hope and all the faith. No matter what obstacles came from Rhys’ past, we would confront them together.

I knew I had to remind myself to not push him. We were still getting to know each other. The more time we spent together, the sooner he would see I was a safe place for him. Still it was amazing to hear that Rhys’ secret wasn’t inherently bad. My brain had gone to some really wild places, I would admit.

I did everything to silence the voices whispering in the silence, trying to question the truth of his words.

Was he downplaying things, or was he for real when he said the secret wasn’t so profound that it would shatter the fragile bond we were building?

Rhys felt like more than just a lover; it felt like something real was developing between us. He felt like a beacon that was guiding me out of the darkest moments of my life. He was the light at the end of what had felt like a seemingly endless tunnel. Without him, I would be lost, adrift at sea.

The thought of cutting ties with him, of severing the connection that bound us together, was something I never imagined. And the prospect of losing it felt too painful to even contemplate. I hadn’t expected anything out of my decision to move to Asheville, but he felt like the silver lining for everything that had happened. He felt like the missing piece of the puzzle that completed the picture of my life.

I glanced at him, taking in the now familiar contours of his face, the warmth of his smile, and the emotions that shone in his eyes. I didn’t want to entertain the idea of losing him, of facing the world alone yet again.

“I meant what I said,” he murmured, his voice soft yet resolute. “It’s nothing bad, not really... it’s just something that may take some getting used to, but I swear it’s not bad. Not really. Maybe unexpected, and it could be a surprise at first.”

I nodded, feeling a wave of relief flood through me as I leaned into his arms, holding on to his words.

Emilia, Rhys and me were the beginning of our new chapter. I was looking forward to it.