24. Transition

As I had expected, Blake was understanding and supportive of the elves’ need to concentrate on the troubling information Kelda had uncovered. Despite not having a scientific background, he recognized the magnitude of the problem.

If all elves were truly too closely related to have further generations of elves, what did that mean for our species? How did the shifters fit into this?

Our goddess had sent us to them for a reason, that I believed with my heart. I just wondered sometimes, when my faith slipped, if she had done it as a form of punishment. Here we were in our time of need watching the shifters flourish with this gift their goddess had given them. Were we no longer worthy of her love? Had we forgotten her?

When I was avoiding sleep, I had found myself with too much time to contemplate not only the situation with Axel, but my faith and life.

Aldrin had been right when he gave me the sleeping tonics. More of a restful type of sleep worked wonders for my health and general wellbeing. I was still troubled with odd dreams, except the tone of them had changed. Owls were a constant companion, though they no longer felt like a threat.

There were times when I wondered if I was being tested, especially when I discovered many of our people were refusing the genetic testing. They did not want to believe the problem was them. Some wanted to blame the fae, others the shifters, particularly because they were having lots of babies compared to before. A faction wanted to believe our goddess was the issue. They thought we had slipped too far from what our goddess wanted us to be. We weren’t following their rigid social structure, worshiping frequently enough, being pious appropriately.

Of course, they blamed my mother, and me by extension, for a lot of it. Her recent truce with the fae was a mistake. She was a weak leader in their minds. She had not done enough to secure our future. Her husband should not have gone to war leaving us behind when I was too young to really remember him. My mother should have remarried, even if it was just a political alliance. A donor should have been found sooner to give her a female child.

I had heard a lot of criticism of my mother and her rule over my time in the army, so I had grown somewhat immune to it. Around the pack compound, there was some dissent, however these elves had spent time with the shifters and knew their goddess had tested them. They seemed to think this was our test and our goddess would arrive with the solution and renew their faith.

It was a nice thought. I planned to be more realistic. If it was time for elves to die out as a species, we would fade knowing we had done our best. As long as I got some time with Axel first, that was all that mattered to me.

A few weeks had passed since the healing with Hiroshi, who had announced his pregnancy. Other elves had been reluctant to combine their magic with shifters since, though they had been given a sanitized version of my story. All who had been involved believed something else had happened to me during my recovery. I would have awoken after a couple of days had it not been for the strange malady that came over me.

ívarr maintained I would have come out of it on my own, just for Axel’s sake, and had not needed my mother’s intervention. He had grown to be quite the romantic now that he had a woman to woo. Michaella was certainly softening his sharp edges. It was a pleasure to witness and something for Kelda to tease her brother over.

Walking back from Axel’s office with yet another security update turned into an afternoon date, complete with blowjobs in the woods behind the house, I began to feel peculiar.

My temperature began to fluctuate, like I was suffering from a fever. I debated going to the clinic to have Aldrin look at me, but wondered if I had just eaten something that didn’t agree with me at lunch.

With my new cell, I texted both ívarr who was expecting me at the science center, and Axel, who would worry if he heard I had vanished. He needed to know I was home and safe. Though it was likely he would cut short his day to come home and check on me.

Messages sent and replies received, I headed back to our house. All I wanted to do was slake my thirst and fall into bed.

My skin felt like I was on fire. The fabric of my clothing itched and scraped over sensitive skin. The light of the afternoon stung my eyes.

All around me were shapes and colors, all blurred or out of focus. I winced at the throbbing in my head. It felt like something wanted to burst free.

Scents were impossibly strong, turning my stomach.

Sounds were far too loud, making me wince. I wondered if I would have the strength at home to cast a silencing bubble, or perhaps Axel had a witch ward to give me some peace.

Walking slowly, avoiding people as much as possible, I made it home. I poured a glass of water from the dispenser in the fridge. It was blessedly cool on my parched throat.

I set the empty glass down, suddenly feeling freezing. I wanted to burrow into our bed and surround myself with the scent of my mate.

Axel.

Regretting telling him not to come home, I stripped off my clammy, itchy clothing and got into bed. Wrapping the woolen blanket around me, I shivered, teeth chattering together.

It was tempting to call for Axel. He would know what to do. The only thing preventing me from doing so was a meeting he had to attend about a recent attack.

Wishing for him, I tried to lie down, to ease the ache in my limbs.

Something felt very wrong.

Instead, I focused my magic, trying to warm myself up, only for it to work too well. My blanket heated then with a flash of light, incinerated to ash.

The laugh that escaped me sounded manic, even to my own ears.

A fever came over me again, making me long for the cool waters of Sweetwater Lake. I sweated and panted, writhing with the sudden pain washing over me, locking my muscles.

I cried out, afraid of how quickly this illness was affecting me and the rapid changes of symptoms.

Pain ripped through me. Every nerve ablaze with a biting sensation.

Curling into a ball as best as I could, I tried to breathe through it all. I couldn’t reach my phone, it was too far from my cramping fingers. Using magic was a risk I could not take, not after the blanket.

Then I was cold again. Ice felt like it was running through my veins, chilling me from the inside out.

“Axel,” I called into the empty room, scared and alone.

No, I had faith.

I remembered a distant dream of a woman under a tree.

Unnatural.

My mind lost its peace with another fever. This was unnatural.

This wasn’t an illness, it was a curse.

Unless it was a blessing.

I woke slowly.

Everything looked different, my sight so much sharper than before. Everything in our room looked the same, just bigger.

Or I was so much smaller than before.

Looking down, I saw white feathers and creamy taloned feet ending with wickedly sharp claws. In my agitation I fluttered long wings. My claws, so sharp, dug into the bedding, creating holes.

What on earth had happened?

Why did I have talons?

Perfect for catching prey, a new voice said in my mind.

Who are you?

I am you, but more.

That does not answer my question.

You may decide to give me a name later. There is much for us to discover together.

This strange voice was cryptic. They did not feel threatening. I felt no urge to panic.

I took stock of what was happening. Trying to be rational and calm. Nothing would come from acting hastily.

I was an owl.

A snowy owl, from the reflection in the dresser mirror, just like that of my family line. My body had either changed, or my mind had slipped its hold on sanity, or my consciousness had escaped my body and entered some owl that just so happened to be on our bed.

Looking around myself, I saw no trace of my elf body. No. I was now in this animal shape or had lost my mind.

You are quite rational. You are the owl, or rather, we are the owl. You are just seeing me while you come along for the ride, elf.

An owl!

I got the impression the voice I was hearing was laughing at me.

Somehow, I had turned into an owl and had a voice speaking to me, like that of shifters with their alters.

Did that make me a shifter now?

Unless this was a dream.

Under me, I could feel the sheets from the bed and the remaining ashes from when I burned the blanket during my attempt at magic. I tweaked at a feather with my sharp beak earning a grumble for the alter voice and a bite of pain.

No, this was really happening to me. I had shifted!

What did this mean? Was I no longer an elf? Would I only shift once? Was this part of the strange illness I had?

I think that was me being born, my alter remarked. I’m sorry if it was painful. Can we go outside? I would like to see the sky.

Give me a moment, please. To adjust.

We should explore, it, or rather, he, suggested. Yes, I think we will be friends. First, let’s explore. I want to feel what the wind is like through our feathers.

Was I wasting this opportunity by staying in the house?

Taking that as an agreement, my alter took charge of our body and flew out of the room, tracking the air currents to the front door. The closed front door.

Open it, my owl demanded, keeping us suspended in the air in front of the door.

I cannot.My magic was too volatile. I could damage the house.

Again, he took over. He flew to the window and screeched. It shattered with the pulse of energy and sound he emitted.

You think too much, he chided.

Glass gone, he took us out of the window and into the open air. The street on which we lived was quiet, it was around dinner time for most.

We flew into the air, rejoicing with a cry as we soared high. We circled over the trees, over the water, dripping low to touch it with our feet.

Together we explored the territory of our pack and checked for intruders. We called to a raven friend. They stopped their flight, returning to the ground to call for help. They did not understand who we were.

The raven was interesting, we caught the scent of omega, which reminded us we had a mate to track down and claim.

Purpose centered our mind. We had to find Axel. He had to know we were now a shifter like him.

It did not take us long to locate his office. There were more cries as we closed in on the mansion.

Outside of his office window was a handy planter filled with summer flowers. We landed and tapped on the window with our beak.

“An owl? Seriously? I don’t think the aviary has snowy owls. I’d have to check.”

Axel was on a call about my presence in the compound. They thought me to be an intruder because I could not use the pack link yet.

“You sure the owl felt friendly?” There was a pause as the person answered. Through the glass and across the room I could not catch all of the reply. “It came this way?” He was nodding. He turned and caught my gaze. “I’ve found him. Call you back.”

He hung up the phone and came to the window. Without a trace of fear, he opened it.

“Teárlach? Is that you?”

Since my alter had used magic without any backlash, I tried to link our minds again.

It is me, dear one.

“You’re an owl.”

I am. I share an animal soul. There is another voice. He was quite insistent I find you.

Axel smiled. “He was, huh?”

Yes. You are so beautiful to us both, you’ve bewitched him already. I wanted to show you this since I do not know if this is permanent. Will you come explore the forest with me?

He opened the window further, then stripped and shifted. As a wolf, he climbed out of the window and brushed up against me.

Oh, wow! You smell amazing!

What do I smell like?

The same honey and jasmine of before, but also rainwater and…

And?

Alpha.