15. The Beta Curse

With the visit to the demon realm going ahead, I was at a loss. Blake wanted to keep the team small, hoping it would hide his absence from the pack. The more people who went, the more chance there was someone would notice. I got the logic of it, but it hurt that I wouldn’t be there. Deke, as Head Enforcer, was going, which did make sense. Larken too, since he had experience with the demons, having gone on the mission to rescue Toth.

My job was to watch the people left behind, with Chase beside me. I was in charge until Blake returned.

“I hope we get to visit the orchard soon. The hell-spice apples sound amazing.” Chase was keeping a watchful eye on the path leading to the mansion. We often rotated the security jobs. Getting stuck in the same place all the time was a recipe for disaster, usually because you end up becoming complacent.

“They do,” I agreed. “Maybe they’ll bring samples back with them.”

“Oooh, I wonder what Winter could cook up with them!” My bond with Chase rang with his mental thoughts. He didn’t often close himself to me. He and his wolf were imagining all the things which could be made with apples, making my wolf also want one. Our wolves loved the apples our orchard grew. They both wondered what was so special about demon ones.

Winter would love to get his hands on demon food, something none of us had really experienced. Demons had really shut themselves away from humans, and the rest of supernatural kind, because of the way witches could enslave them with their true names.

“Hey,” Dakota said as he approached. “Kade texted to say they are coming back with Cody and Toth soon, they want to partner up. Then there’s talk of another demon who wants to discuss buying the heat club!”

Dakota might have sounded excited about it but I shared a look with my twin.

Is that wise?he asked me, just using our family bond.

I bet Kade and Blake have thought about the implications of having a demon run a heat club. Kade would never put omegas at risk of being used or manipulated. Dakota knows the laws, so if he’s keen on the idea, then there’s an angle they can work.

My brother had sound business sense. If he thought it could be successful, then he’d find a way to make it happen. There had to be an angle for the demon as well as us, but if they weren’t concerned, then I wasn’t either.

“Sounds good,” I said aloud. “Where’s Roan?”

“I heard him on the phone with Hiroshi. Kade tried calling him first but texted me when he couldn’t get him.”

“Is there—?”

“Nothing’s wrong with the babies,” Dakota assured me. “Roan was just listening to Hiroshi tell him some work stuff. Probably nothing interesting, but they talk all the time.”

“Gag,” Chase joked. “I’m happy for Roan, you know. After all the shit he went through.”

“Some of the pack are still wary of him,” Dakota said, shaking his head sadly. “That kid literally risked his life for the pack and they treat him like a pariah.”

Axel!“Axel!” Dalton cried, racing for the door.

“Woah! Where’s the fire?” I halted the beta, my assistant, by grasping him by his narrow shoulders. The raccoon shifter was shorter than me, with medium brown hair and hazel eyes.

“You’re needed since Blake isn’t back yet! There’s a meeting at the science center!”

He shook under my hold. I still hadn’t let go, understanding without needing to be told that Dalton was at risk of coming apart under my hands. He was terrified, yet also hopeful.

Then he said the words that would change all of our futures.

“Hiroshi has figured out why we had the beta sickness.”

They appeared to be waiting for me to start. I ducked into the room, giving a nod to Hiroshi to start the presentation.

I stayed standing, taking note of all who were in the room and the council members on a video screen.

The original elves, Hakeem, Teagan, ívarr and Teárlach were all sitting around a large table with Aldrin and James.

Hiroshi looked shaken. He was nervous as he cued up the documents he wanted to show us. His hands shook and his voice wavered.

“Someone had already found the gene. They just hadn’t been able to compare it with other samples, or discarded it as unimportant.” Hiroshi put something onto the whiteboard behind him. It meant nothing to me, but I tried to make sense of it all so I could attempt to explain it to my brother later. Blake was hating missing this, but the demons and the investment they were making was too important.

Not that the beta sickness wasn’t important, but what Hiroshi had to say could keep for an hour or two while Toth signed some contracts. I just knew Blake was feeling sick at missing out.

I tried to pay attention as there was a back and forth over who had left the note Hiroshi had found. A tingle of awareness flitted over my skin. I didn’t think there had been a note. The Luna had given Hiroshi a nudge. She was sick of waiting for us to find it, or maybe he was finding it just as he should.

Hiroshi shrugged it off, getting back to the matter at hand. “As you can see, the alpha and omega do not have this gene. It gets interesting when I do this.” He went into detail, comparing the two sets of genes the betas who had been sick for a month had. Then added he thought the mating bite was the point of activation but admitted he couldn’t be sure of it and it would need more testing.

Eventually, I had to take a seat. There was just so much for me to take in. No one had acknowledged it, but I was one of the betas they were discussing. Chase had only been sick for two weeks, so it was likely he had a malformed gene. I had a fully formed gene. I didn’t know which designation I had, just which one I hoped for.

They went around in circles about keeping the information quiet for a little longer. The implications this would have for shifter kind. The elves wondered why they had been drawn here to help us discover this.

There was so much we didn’t know. Was it only an alpha bite that worked? Could betas bite each other? Was there another way to trigger the change?

Then we had to consider if all the betas would want to change. It was a lot to think about. Completely life changing. Not just for them, for their packs, since this was a shifter wide problem, or blessing, depending on how you looked at it.

Either way, we were potentially going to have a new batch of omegas and alphas. People who would have to adjust to the influx of shifter hormones that would dictate their actions until they could get a handle on them.

Babies. We could have a lot of babies in the near future.

Raging alphas. Would more of them be like Asher? Jealous and irrational?

All of this had to be done so carefully. We couldn’t just drop the bomb on them and let them figure it out. They had to be guided through this.

Blake would want to tell them soon. Prepare them mentally so no more accidental changes happened, if that was possible. What had happened to Tate and Asher could have been a fluke.

I knew, if I had the gene I wanted, then I would want to go through with changing. The goddess had given me this gift, I had to take it. I believed most would want to do the same, regardless of the consequences.

Teárlach squeezed my hand, pulling me back into reality. If I got what I wanted, I would lose him. If I changed my designation either way our relationship was doomed.

Could I give him up for what I’d always dreamed of?

We didn’t know if the bondings would stick if a beta chose to bond with an alpha to go through the transformation. Asher and Tate had already broken their bonds, so I hoped the beta pairings, like Jake and Sebastian, could break their mating and re-bond if that was what they wanted. It really depended on their designations.

The call with the council ended with a promise to discuss this in more detail with Blake present. Kade would need to be there as the representative of male omegas.

Maybe they sensed I wanted to know, but one by one, the elves and healers left until it was just me, T and Hiroshi.

T kissed me quickly and followed his friend, knowing I wanted privacy to find this out.

“Do you know if I have the gene?” I asked. It was a stupid question. I knew I had the gene because Hiroshi had been so careful not to use my information, though I knew he had it. I’d glimpsed the file with my name on it.

Hiroshi told me I did and I asked which one. My heart was thundering in my chest as he looked through the pile of messy papers, found mine, then wrote a single word in pencil.

Omega.

I felt my heart soar. The Luna had proven my faith in her right. She had given me exactly what I’d wanted since I was old enough to know there were male omegas.

Long ago, when I was maybe four, a male omega had found his way to the pack. He was a wolf, like Kade, so father had accepted him. He didn’t seem to hate male omegas then. That came later. Maybe it was my fault. I was fascinated when the omega went into heat and ended up pregnant with an enforcer. The alpha had mated his omega and they welcomed an alpha son. They weren’t fated mates, so they had a lot of issues. Quite often, the omega was left alone to look after the baby.

One day, the omega left the pack, returning to his family with the child and without his mate. The alpha had died in a challenge for trying to sleep with another alpha’s omega.

When he left, I was heartbroken and often asked for my friend. He was the last male omega in the pack until Kade.

Though I was ecstatic about being a potential omega, this news had the ability to obliterate my life.

“Only you can know for now. Please,” I begged Hiroshi.

“But—“

“No, Hiroshi. This could have dire consequences for the pack if this got out.” I’d lose my job as Second to Blake if they knew I was an omega. It was better they suspected I was an alpha when this got out. They would think I wasn’t changing or admitting it because I didn’t want to lay claim to the pack.

It took him a moment, but he seemed to understand what this would mean for my place in the pack, for Blake’s leadership when he tried to keep me as Second, because I knew my brother would. He might have relented and changed Tate’s job from enforcer to wing guard, he just wouldn’t for me. He would fight tooth and nail to keep me as his Second because he trusted me above anyone else.

“Of course. Congratulations, Axel,” he finally agreed.

I hugged the omega quickly and fled the room.

Alone. I needed to be out in the forest. Needed time to myself to process.

Of course, with that nagging sense us twins shared, I wasn’t alone for long.

“Thought I’d find you here. You’re as bad as the elf these days.”

I tried for a smile. Chase pulled me into a tight hug. I broke away after a moment to brush tears away.

“What’s wrong?”

Certain we were far enough away, I spoke out loud, whispering the truth to the only person who could know right then.

“An omega? Really?”

“Yeah,” I admitted fearfully.

“Just like you’d always hoped.” He caught my shocked expression. “Did you think you’d kept that from us? Me and my wolf know everything there is to know about you and yours. Of course we knew. Just like you knew about me.”

“So you don’t care?” Fear had words sticking in my throat. Do you see me differently?

“Do you care that I never want to be mated? Am I broken for not wanting all you have?” He raised an eyebrow at me in challenge.

“No. No way. Whatever makes you happy,” I said empathetically.

“Same. This is your dream, Ax. I support it, and Blake would too if you gave him a chance.”

“He would ruin what he’s built here… and it might never happen. It has to stay a secret for right now. Until we know for sure how to do it. Not just for Blake either, for T… I—“

“Hey, it’s alright.” Chase hugged me close again. “I’m here when you need me, okay? Now go, run. Your wolf needs it.”

“Thanks.” I got up and walked to the woods. Turning around just once to see my brother watching over me.

At the edge of the trees, I stripped and ran through the woods in my wolf form. It was weird being the passenger in my body when he took over, but he took control. I sat back, happy to watch him work through things.

Both of us had a lot of feelings. His were always simpler than mine. He didn’t worry about pack politics or gender stereotypes.

Happy,he told me. I could tell just how much it meant to him.

Not scared? You want a baby too?

Yes,he agreed. Lots of babies. Just with the elf.

My heart couldn’t take it. Steps faltering, I tried to explain. We could have this with an alpha, but not with our elf. To carry a baby, it would have to belong to someone else. Not Teárlach.

Inside, my wolf raged at the thought of anyone else being our mate. He was as besotted with T as I was.

We might be able to get a sperm donor and have to wait until they figured out the change without a bite, I tried to soothe him.

Wait,my wolf told me. The Luna will know what to do.

I couldn’t help but hold onto hope that my wolf was right. Everything would work out. Somehow, magically, I’d get everything I ever wanted.

No, life wasn’t that kind. In the back of my brain, a memory formed. I vaguely recalled the time asleep… a dream. A choice to be made.

It would be a choice. Love or a baby of my own.

Wait, my alter urged. He sent me an image of me and T with a baby, a little family. It was such a beautiful dream, I couldn’t help but smile through my sadness.

What did it hurt to hold onto that dream for just a moment, as ridiculous as it was? It was only my heart that would get broken.