Chapter 3

Sloane

Am I really doing this?

Tugging the soft material of my sweater around me tighter, I make my way down the short alley. There are large dumpsters, and the area smells like trash, making me nauseous as I head to the back entrance. It doesn't look like a fancy club back here, but I keep going like the manager Ms. Calloway instructed me to. I see a woman up ahead and breathe a small sigh of relief when she greets me in a brisk, businesslike manner. She hustles me in and live music drifts back from the main club area. It's nice, smooth jazz, but even that does nothing to soothe my jangled nerves.

"Hurry, hurry," Ms. Calloway says, leading me to a dressing room where several other girls are wearing slinky lingerie and waiting for the auction to start.

I am so out of my depth here. She hands me a short, sheer pink nightie and what looks like a few strings before ushering me behind a curtain to change. My hands shake as I slip off my jeans. The little pink strings are apparently panties, but they cover almost nothing. You can do this. Replacing my sweater with the revealing garment, I feel completely vulnerable and freeze.

"Everything okay in there?" Ms. Calloway calls.

"Ummmm—I think so," I say, walking out, using my hands to cover myself.

"You're going to do great," she assures me. "They'll go wild, especially since you're the only virgin tonight."

How can she be so matter-of-fact? No one else even glances our way, but I burn with embarrassment. I'd gone into the initial meeting to sign the auction contract thinking my lack of experience was going to be a deal breaker, but it was the exact opposite. Apparently, there's a real market for it.

Leaning over, I grip my knees as I hear the music stop up front. Oh God, it's time.

"You're going to make a killing," one girl tells me, patting my back. "I wish I'd known about this before I lost my virginity to some loser football player back in eleventh grade."

Goosebumps break out all over my body, but I nod and try to keep it together. There is no choice. I need to do this if I want to keep us from becoming permanently homeless. The motel is awful. We can't take a full shower, loud fights outside keep us up, and the blankets are dirty and uncomfortable. The worst of it is, we're lucky to be there, and if I don't get up on that stage in a few minutes, we'll be out on the street tomorrow night.

Ms. Calloway leads me down the hallway to a sheer curtain that opens onto the stage. I peek through it, but bright spotlights don't let me see much more than a general crowd milling around.

My hands are sweaty and my heart is thundering in my ears. The underwire in this nighty digs into me and pushes my breasts up practically to my chin. The gauzy material is thin and I worry it will be completely see-through under those lights. No one has ever seen me naked before.

Panic begins to take over. My hands shake and my vision swims. I want to turn and run right out of this place. After tonight, I'll have more money than I know what to do with and our troubles will be over.

I take a few deep breaths and force my face to smile. It's not like I have any special feelings about still being a virgin at nineteen. I just haven't found the right guy, always so busy with school and work. Sure, I might have wanted some romance involved for my first time, someone I actually knew… but I can't dwell on it now or I'll burst into tears. It's only my first time. No big deal, right?

I can do this. The announcer finishes his speech and Ms. Calloway nudges me onto the stage.

The bright lights immediately blind me making me stumble, and I can feel my smile slip. A roaring fills my ears and I fist the hem of my see-through lingerie to stop myself from covering up.

I'm frozen, shaking.

What the hell am I doing?