1. Chapter 1

Jade

"Ican't deal with her anymore!" The scream is one of finality, and it echoes around the hollow room, cracking through the air like a slap straight to the face.

I've finally done it.

I've finally pushed Kim Donovan to her breaking point.

I didn't think it would feel like this—getting to this terminal place. I didn't think it would hurt, but a pain like I've never experienced radiates from my chest, rolling down into my ribs. It feels as though all the air has been sucked out of the room, knocked out of me in the process.

I'd given up on Kim years ago. Given up on her ability to love, to nurture… given up on calling her my mother. So why? Why does this ache sting so horribly?

Am I the kind of person who can handle being thrown away twice? I ask myself this, and yet, I know. I'm not. I'm not strong. I break easy, and I break hard. It's less like a crack and more of a shatter, making the pieces of me painfully difficult to repair.

I've grown, yes. Learned to protect myself in ways I never imagined myself capable of. I'm not sure if that makes me strong or stupid, given that protecting myself is exactly what put me in this position.

Eyes blazing with burning rage, she continues. Verbally twisting an invisible knife in my gut, tearing up my insides without a second thought. "I don't want her in this house for even one more second!"

The social worker who has been forced to be here with us looks as if she's witnessing a puppy being kicked. And I'm the puppy.

It's not her that speaks in return, though. It's the uniformed officer at her side. "Ma'am, if you attempt to remove your daughter from your home before she becomes of age, you'll be charged with reckless abandonment of a minor."

I didn't realize the state cared so much about the abuse of minors. I figured a few weeks wouldn't make a difference to them and I'd be finding somewhere else to sleep tonight. Maybe the school—if I could break in without being caught.

"She's only got two weeks!" Kim seethes, practically pulling her hair out at the root. "Surely no jury would convict me of removing that lunatic from my home! She's unstable and unwelcome! She should be the one in handcuffs!"

Even the cop winces at her cruel words. "We've been over this, Miss Donovan. Your daughter can't be charged, her actions have been decided as just. The district attorney will not bring her to court for actions made in self-defense."

Self-defense. Self. Defense.

Does he really see it that way? I find myself hoping he does.

He's a random man I've never met before, but anyone understanding what happened even a little bit feels like a cold brush of relief. Someone not only believes me but thinks I have a right to do what I've done.

Kim screeches so loudly that my ears throb. "I. Want. Her. Out!"

The officer lets out a long sigh. "Unless there is a blood relative willing to assume custody of your daughter, she'll need to remain housed here until she turns eighteen, ma'am. That's the law."

"Don't they make homes for troubled kids for shit like this!"

The social worker makes a noise of protest. "That is not how that works."

Before Kim can scream again, the cop holds up a hand. "Is there another family member who can assume responsibility for Jade? Someone you can call?"

I'm waiting for her to exasperatedly tell him that there's no one. Kim doesn't keep in touch with any family. The only connections she keeps are ones she can forget at the drop of a hat, and that's harder to do with blood, so she doesn't keep them close.

But as I stare at the heated scene from my uncomfortable spot on the couch, something on her face shifts. It's as if she's molding into a supervillain right in front of me, eyes sparkling with mischief, lips turning up into a dark grin.

"Oooh, there's someone who can take her."

What?

My eyebrows draw down as the cop pulls a pen and pad from his pocket. He dots the tip of the pen on his tongue, preparing to write.

"How is this person related to Jade, and do you have their current contact information?"

"Oh, I think you have their current details, Officer Brian."

She said his name?Maybe he's wearing a name tag I can't see. Do cops have name tags? Not the point, what is Kim trying to imply?

"What?" Officer Brian gives her a confused look. "Why?"

"You'll be needing to contact Dante Moretti. I'm sure you have a way of doing that, no?"

You could hear a pin drop, the way the room breaks into a hushed silence. I don't recognize the name at all, but judging by the look on Brian's face, he does. With the horrified look on the social worker's previously sweet face, I know she does, too. And it scares her.

The tone of his voice shifts into a cold, deep rumble as he speaks again. "Are you saying that you are of relation to Dante Moretti?"

"Oh, no," Kim tsks. "Not me. Just Jade."

"What connection are you implying?—"

For the first time since this conversation began, Kim turns her sights on me, drawing out one word. One vicious word.

"Paternal."

My mouth dries up, and I feel all the color drain from my face. A noise of surprise laced with fear leaves the social worker's lips. More horror paints her expression.

"Dante Moretti is Jade's father?" the man with the badge asks, his words strung together in disbelief. "He would never allow?—"

"Oh, he doesn't know about the little psycho. He didn't deserve to know before. But now? She's just like him. He can have her!"

Just like him, what does that mean? I want to scream it, my head beginning to pound with the countless questions I have rolling around.

"You said my dad left," I croak, barely able to get the words out. "You said he met me as a baby and left. You said you couldn't contact him if you tried. Why would you…" I trail off, choking back tears.

The pure venom in her stare is enough to make bile burn the back of my throat. "You should be thanking me. I didn't want you, and he would have wanted you even less. I raised you good and right. Dante wouldn't have known what to do with a burden like you. A daughter in his world," she starts, clicking her tongue. "You'd be eaten alive. I hope there's still time for that to happen!"

Crack. Crack. Crack. My ribs scream with each new intake of breath.

Hurt, betrayal, confusion… they all slither through my veins, chilling me from the inside out. I shiver, breathing through my mouth to get more air into my lungs.

"I hope he kills you on sight," she hisses. "The Morettis like their women pure. Dying for being a whore would serve you well after what you've done!"

Something inside the deep pit of my soul snaps. My broken spirit morphs into an anger I can't control. And I'm on her, pinning her to the ground in a second flat. Slamming my fist into her face.

Two minutes ago, I was devastated that the last bit of my mother that I thought may still love me was gone. Now? I wish I never loved her at all. I wish I never ignored the way she hurt me in favor of forgiving her. I wish she never pretended to care.

At this moment, hitting her as hard and fast as I can before being stopped, I wish she never existed. Even if that means I never existed either. Her face feels like I'm punching concrete, only a soft layer of skin from each of us providing any barrier between bone-on-bone contact. It's sickening and yet I can't end it on my own.

I don't know how many hits I manage to get in before Officer Brian is able to pry me off of her. My knuckles are bloodied, and my chest feels empty as he drags me off of her unconscious body. When I look down at what I've done, she just lies there, bleeding and unmoving. The sight makes me smile and lunge forward, hoping to continue.

"Stop fighting," Brian grunts, trying to hold me in place while I kick and squirm to get away. "If I bruise you even accidentally, he'll kill me."

I stiffen, immediately going still. He's talking about my father. The father I didn't know existed. The man Kim wants to kill me. But if he wanted to kill me, why would he kill Brian for bruising me?

"He won't hurt you, Jade," he whispers the vow into my ear like he's read my mind. "Dante is a complicated man. But he takes care of his children."

I wonder if he's telling the truth, but something about his soft, reassuring tone, coupled with the way he lets me go, makes me think he is. Maybe Kim doesn't know Dante as well as she thinks she does.

He takes care of his children.The declaration replays inside of my head, latching on to one word. Children. He has more than one, and that doesn't include me.

I have siblings.

I have a dad.

Unless Kim is lying, which would make this the sickest thing she's ever done to me. I won't give her the satisfaction of getting my hopes up. I refuse.

"I can't be here," the social worker lady rasps. My head whips toward her, having forgotten she was even here. She'd looked so young and hopeful when she first came in, and now she just looks haunted. "I'll inform our office that Jade is being placed with her father. I saw nothing else."

With only a nod from Brian she rushes out of the house like she's on fire.

It happens quickly after that—the cover-up. Brian puts me in the back of his cruiser and radios for an ambulance, calling it in as a possible robbery. He mutters some low code that I can't decipher, but I'm too numb to ask what it means.

I assume he's driving me to the police station or somewhere for my mysterious father to come get me, but I don't bother asking. I just breathe, staring blankly out of my window as the sun begins to set.

When we stop for gas, I know we haven't been driving long. So, he either had a low tank to begin with or knows he needs more for the drive. Either way, I don't let him clean my knuckles when he offers. Instead, I tuck my hands into my lap with a silent shake of my head.

They hurt, but I don't want him to touch me. I don't want anyone to touch me. I don't even want me to be touching me.

He curses, grumbling about having his ass kicked for leaving me bleeding, but he doesn't press further. I don't change my mind. I'm hardly bleeding, it'll dry up before we arrive. I think.

It's just little breaks in your skin,I tell myself. Nothing that can't wait. Maybe you can sit in the shower, and they'll clean themselves.

Sunset shifts into the early night sky, and still I stare out the window. Lights flicker as we speed by, houses slowly becoming less frequent. More trees fill the scenic route instead.

Brian tries to talk to me multiple times, asking if I'm alright, but I'm only able to offer mumbles in return. I'm not sure if I'm alright or not, but I don't have any complaints he can help me with. Unless he can go back to the day of my birth and alter the entire trajectory of my impending life.

"We're almost there," he tells me, making his voice low and gentle. "I'm going to have you wait in the car when we arrive. It won't be long, though, alright?"

My stomach twists at the thought of being alone. "Where?" Where are we going? I need to hear the words.

He sighs. "Your fath—Dante's house. It's guarded heavily, you'll be safe in the car. I just need to speak with him before he sees you. Okay?"

Preparing him for the mess that is me. Great.

I shrug even though my heart aches. "Okay."

When the car rolls to a stop, I blow out a tired breath and take in the view around me.