Chapter 38

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Ainsley

Jacob drives eastbound on I-90. Matt and I fight in the back seat about the blindfold he wants to put on me. I hate having my eyes covered.

"If you don't put it on, this won't be a surprise," he insists while laughing. He's the most ticklish person I've ever known, and just the threat of being tickled makes him squirm and laugh.

"One job, Matt," Jacob admonishes him.

"Not the easiest one since she's attacking me," my brother complains. "What if she bites me?"

"She's been vaccinated," Jacob reminds him. "You'll survive if she does. Do it now before you ruin Bradley's plan. We don't like him upset, do we?"

"For once in your lifetime, don't be a bitch," he requests, batting his eyes at me. "Be a nice sister."

I finally yield because his puppy-pout is really good. The car stops after only a few minutes. The doors open and close a few times before a hand grips my arm.

"Let's get this show on the road, little sister," Jacob speaks up, but I know he isn't the one holding me.

Those long, strong hands filled with calluses on the base of his palms are Mason's. His fresh, soapy aroma confirms my suspicions.

"Walk a few steps," Jacob continues. "Follow my lead."

I follow the lead of Mason, who holds me and continues walking. The noise of a car ignition makes me jerk to the left. It doesn't take long for the car to shift, and the sound of it moving away soon follows. I continue until the hands that hold me gently force me to stop.

The blindfold comes off, and I'm in front of a big house that has a four-car garage to the left. Two floors, tan color with a balcony above the main door. A ‘For Sale' sign is in front of the house, next to steps leading to a pretty door.

Mason stands there with his weary, stormy eyes set on me. "Hi." He places his hands in his pockets and swings himself on his heels.

"Hi." I take a step backward so I can see him better.

He rubs his face as he paces back and forth from where I stand to the garage door. I follow halfway and sit on the front step, waiting for him to finish his thinking time.

"Give me a chance to show you that I'm the right guy for you." Mason stops in front of me and pulls me up. We stand toe to toe, and our bodies are only inches away from each other. His heat melts my determination to keep a flat fa?ade. He drops his forehead to mine.

"I'm terrified, Ainse," he begins. "Scared shitless that I'll fail you—us. That our life together won't measure up to what you need, to your standards, because I grew up in a bizarre family. That we'll end up hating each other. I can't hate you. I can't lose you, but my fear pushed me to act like an idiot and I lost you."

He lowers his head, his eyes never leaving mine.

"I lost you," his whispery voice repeats the three saddest words. Mason smooths my hair, then places his hands on my hips.

"Families are different. No one is normal, and everyone has a different dynamic," I remind him. "I have two fathers. My mom is a combo of a Petri dish, a surrogate, and a donor." I try to bring some humor to the conversation, but I fail. He doesn't react.

"Life, in fact, is scary," I whisper. "Love is, as you said, terrifying. I'm also afraid of many things. The future, our careers, my dreams colliding with yours. It's too much to wonder where we'd be if we can't mesh our personalities." I bring my hands to his face and hold his cheeks. "The secret is to keep trying. You can't fail if you work at it daily," I repeat my parents' wise words. "Mase, you gave up too easily. Maybe it was because I'm not that person you can go the distance for. It hurts because my stupid heart believes that you are it for me."

Mason holds my head, and his unwavering eyes have a light to them that makes me keep mine open, even when I want to shut them tightly.

"I came to the realization that I love you more than I will ever love anyone else," he says. Before I can say anything about the "I love you," he gives me a peck on the lips. "Because every day I fall even more in love with who you are. I'm new at this loving thing."

He kisses the tip of my nose, placing his hands on the sides of my head. My gut releases a few knots, and my lungs are able to take a few more sips of air.

"Before you, I never felt anything inside. No one has taken residence in here." He touches his heart. "Only you. This is yours. Maybe it has been all along." He grabs my hand and presses it to his chest. I lift the other and caress the back of his neck.

"I can only promise that I'll make mistakes along the way and that during those mistakes, I'll work hard to mend them."

"What guarantee do I have that next time you don't like something, you won't run away again and leave me hanging without an explanation?"

"I give you my word," Mase takes a step back from me. Then he pulls something from his pocket and drops to one knee. "With one condition. That you give me a lifetime with you. Marry me, Ainsley Janine Colthurst-Decker. If you marry me, not only will I swear to stick around forever, but I'll talk about our issues the way you like."

"Forever is a big word," I challenge him.

"You are interrupting," he says between clenched teeth. "Patience, lady."

"I don't have any patience."

He frowns.

"If you haven't figured that out by now, we're in trouble."

"I've known that since forever, Nine." He chuckles. "You've never had patience."

He rises from his knee and stares down at me. "Look, my parents had a short marriage and divorced because Mom never trusted my father. Trust is hard to earn and give, but I trust you, and I'm sorry I fucked up. Sometimes I am hotheaded and do things without thinking. Logic can disappear when I'm worked up. If you don't trust me, I get it, and I'll do everything within my power to win it back."

He takes my hand and I want to tell him that my heart and I forgave him with the postcards and letter where he told everyone that one day he'd marry me. Which is the same heart that jumped inside its chest the moment he mentioned that he's never loved anybody the way he does me.

But I wait.

"I fell hopelessly in love with you. Your smiles, your voice, your eyes, your heart, the way you love unconditionally. All of you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. If I only had one day left to live, I'd die a happy man if I shared it with you. Wish number eight: spend the rest of my life with you. Wish number nine: create a family. Finally have a house." He tips his head toward the big house in front of us. "A dog, babies—our babies."

I want to find a way to assure him that we can do this, we can make it. An idea starts to take root. "Yes. I'll marry you—I'll have your babies."

"No, damn it, I have a speech." He takes another exasperated breath. "One where I tell you that you're the spark my life needs in order to be happy. With you, I have the home I never thought I would need or want—you're my life, my home, my heart. You bring out the best in me, and I don't want to spend another day without you. If you give me a chance, I swear that I can be everything you want. The speech included the idea of eloping and the possibility of buying this house—making it our home."

Tears spill from my eyes. My heart does a few flips at the idea of him thinking of me as his home, as his spark, as his . Mason is stoic and watching. I forgot how much he hates to wait for answers. I wipe my tears and speak, "You're already all I want, Mase. That's all I want. You."

I stand on my tiptoes and kiss his lips.

"I love you, Mase, and it killed me that you left and didn't believe in us. But you know what? You came back. You always do. Then there's the part where you understand me, and if not, you work hard to understand me even when I screw with your logic. So, if the proposal is still open, yes , I'll marry you."

He kisses me long and deep, his hand cupping the back of my head as the other grabs me by the waist. The pain from when he left and every moment I ached with longing for him while he was gone dissipates as we hold each other, connected by that one kiss. As we untangle from each other, Mase slips the ring on my finger. A round solitaire on a twisted band, flanked by two infinity signs covered with tiny diamonds.

"Are those infinity signs?"

"Yes," he says sheepishly.

"I love you, my adorkable guy."

"Unique enough?"

"You gave it to me, Mase. You're unlike any other person I've ever met. This ring is like us; we're two of a kind who finally found each other."