Chapter 22

22

Pain radiated up her spine, pulsating right where the axe had hit her.

“Lilac!”

She forced her eyes open, tilting her head to the sound of her sister’s voice. Poppy and Zinnia sat by the bed. Poppy grabbed her hand, squeezing as her eyes welled with tears.

“You scared the living shit out of us. Don’t do it again.”

Zinnia placed a hand on her leg, smiling. “What Poppy said. It’s so good to see you awake finally.”

“How long—” She swallowed, trying to find her voice. “How long have I been out?”

“Since yesterday. Surgery went well, but everything knocked you out. We got in late last night. We haven’t left your side much. Neither has he.” Poppy jerked her head toward the other side of the bed.

Lila moved her head, cringing at the slow maneuver. Bryce sat slumped in a chair, eyes closed.

“We left to get breakfast, use the bathroom, stretch our legs. That man has not moved much. When he’s awake,” Poppy said in a quieter voice than she had been using before, “he can’t take his eyes off you.”

“He’s even more handsome in person than the pictures you showed us,” Zinnia said.

She had to agree. Pictures didn’t do him justice. But right now, he looked tired, even while sleeping.

“You guys didn’t have to come, but it’s nice to see you.”

Poppy scoffed, rolling her eyes, and sharing a look with Zinnia. “Do you hear her? You guys didn’t have to come.” She scoffed again. “As if we’re going to stay away when you were attacked. She nearly chopped your shoulder off.”

Yes, the pain felt like that very thing had happened. It made it difficult to breathe because every time a tiny inhale occurred, pain radiated everywhere. Even moving her head caused too much discomfort.

“You’ll have a badass scar though.”

A low giggle, then a snort escaped, causing a ricocheting bout of torment to rush down her body. Her short laugh turned into a grimace and groan.

Zinnia slapped Poppy’s shoulder. “Don’t make her laugh. She’s in pain.”

“Lila…”

At the sound of Bryce’s voice, she moved her head in his direction again. Relief poured out of his eyes along with the anguish and guilt, as if he had been the one to hurt her himself.

“We’ll go find a nurse to get you some pain meds.” Poppy stood up, eyeing Zinnia to make sure she agreed. She didn’t hesitate to follow suit. “We’ll make sure they get you the good stuff too. The real good stuff.”

Another light snort came out, making her groan again.

“Sorry.” Poppy winced. “I keep forgetting I shouldn’t make you laugh.”

Zinnia pushed Poppy to leave, and they were alone a few seconds later.

She didn’t even turn her head toward the door when they walked out. She kept it in the same position, directed toward Bryce. One, she didn’t want to take her eyes off him. It was good to see his face. Two, it hurt too much to move. She didn’t have a choice if she didn’t want the ache radiating up and down her body.

“I’m so glad you’re okay. It was kind of scary for a moment there.”

She could only imagine. The thought of being in a waiting room, anticipating news—whether good or bad—on Bryce’s health would put her in a constant state of panic. By the exhaustion in his eyes, he’d been in that very state.

“I’m sorry.”

He shook his head. “I’m not sure why you’re apologizing, but there’s nothing for you to say sorry for. Absolutely nothing.” His gaze drew down to her hand and he flinched, as if he wanted to grab her hand but changed his mind at the last second. “This happened because of me. I should be apologizing.”

“This happened because Becca didn’t want to face the consequences of her actions.”

She wiggled her fingers. He took the small gesture as a sign it was okay to hold her hand. The instant warmth from him settled part of her battered soul.

“I don’t know why she hid the evidence in that room. I don’t think she expected me to find it. When I did, she asked me to keep it a secret. I don’t think she would’ve hurt me if I had agreed.”

He was silent for a moment, making her think he wished she had agreed. Would that have been better in the situation? She’d never know now. Becca could’ve attacked her regardless. It happened and she had to live with her decision.

“Right before she would’ve delivered the final blow, she said she’d make it appear like I killed Denise out of jealousy. That she’d hurt herself to make it appear like she was defending herself against me. That you’d believe all of it. That I was a killer. Because she’s known you longer than I have.”

He frowned, leaning closer to the bed. His grip on her hand even strengthened by a small degree. But not enough to cause her any pain.

“I would’ve never thought Becca was a killer. Not in a million years. But that doesn’t mean I would’ve believed her story about you. I know you.” His eyes gathered with unshed tears. “I love you. I’m not sad Becca is gone. I’m pissed I can’t unleash some of my anger at her. So don’t let anything she said get to you. I would’ve never believed that about you. Never.”

This felt like a pivotal moment. A change in their relationship. They wouldn’t be going back to the status quo they’d been living.

“I didn’t want to hurt her.”

“Don’t feel bad you did. Don’t let her death ruin you. You did what you had to do.” His voice broke, a few tears finding release. “Lila…”

His eyes closed as he heaved a few heavy breaths, trying to regain his composure. She’d never seen him lose his emotions before. This was how she had expected him to react when Denise died. Break down in tears at the loss of life. She remained silent while he gathered himself together. Watching him become so vulnerable in front of her caused her own tears to fall.

His eyes reopened when he heard her sniffle.

“Hey, don’t cry.” He reached over, wiping the water from her cheeks.

A short laugh escaped. “I can’t cry but you can?” She winced as the pain echoed everywhere. “You’re not supposed to make me laugh. It hurts.”

That garnered a smile out of him. The first one since the moment she laid eyes on him. “I didn’t mean to make you laugh. I can’t bear to see your tears.”

The minor laughing break helped both of them to stop crying.

“I know this is a terrible time to bring it up.” Bryce cleared his throat, sliding his hand into his pocket. He withdrew it and opened his palm to reveal the ring she’d been wearing on her finger yesterday. She’d lost it at some point if he was holding it.

The question must’ve been in her eyes. “They removed everything during surgery. They gave everything of yours to Aster and he handed the ring off to me.”

So much had happened with Becca, and all so fast too. She didn’t recall losing it during the scuffle. His answer made total sense.

“I wrote my speech for the town hall meeting an hour before it was scheduled to happen. I struggled with my words, trying to come up with something that would sound believable but not the truth. But I decided to go with the truth. Every word I would’ve uttered would have been sincere. That I love you. That I couldn’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you. That I know how fast everything happened between us, but I know it felt right. That you were meant to be with me. That fate finally got it right.”

He paused, inhaling again, as if he had to stop the tears from coming again.

She wasn’t sure whether they were good or bad ones. Because his words were frightening her. He kept talking in past tense, as if whatever had been between them was over. That he didn’t love her any longer.

“And now none of that is true?”

He looked aghast. “God, no! I feel it now more than ever. The thought of losing you would’ve been the end of me. I wouldn’t have survived it. I love you so damn much, I will follow you to California if you don’t want to stay in Sleighville.” He held out the ring. “Because I want to make the marriage proposal real this time. Marry me, Lila?”

“You’d move to California? For me? Because Denise wanted you to move out of Sleighville for the longest time and you would never budge.” She closed her eyes, not because she couldn’t stand to see the heartache in his, but because the pain was becoming too much.

“You don’t have to answer now. It was silly of me to bring it up.”

His hand disappeared from hers, causing her to jerk open her eyes. He was already standing and rounding the bed. She followed his retreating frame to see Poppy and Zinnia had reappeared with a nurse.

“I’ll let you rest.” He smiled and left before she could respond.

The nurse asked a few questions, administered some medication that she hoped would be fast acting, then told her the doctor would be by to see her soon. She left.

Her sisters converged on both sides of her. She closed her eyes, not sure who to focus on.

“Did I hear that man propose?” Poppy demanded.

“And without her answering,” Zinnia added.

She didn’t know what to say because she didn’t know how she felt. Making Bryce move away from his hometown felt wrong. He loved this place. He belonged here. Sleighville wouldn’t be the same without him as mayor. Giving his statements and speeches when half the time they weren’t required. But the town loved it. Loved him. She’d be the enemy if he moved because of her.

“It’s not that complicated, Lilac. You’re overthinking things in that big head of yours.” Poppy brushed her hand over her hair. “Where you live is semantics. It’s not the end of things. If you love him like that man clearly loves you, then that’s all that matters.”

She reopened her eyes. “I hate the cold.”

Poppy nodded, her eyes enlarging as if she agreed.

“And I didn’t say it to him, but I love him too.”

“You don’t love the heat either,” Zinnia commented.

That was true. She got cranky when it was too hot where they lived. She liked a nice mid-degree temperature, and there wasn’t going to be any place where it was like that all year long. Hating the cold wasn’t a good enough reason to not move to Sleighville.

“Are you two trying to talk me into him moving by me or me staying here? I’m so confused.”

“Hey,” Zinnia started, “we’re not trying to talk you into anything. But you admitted what we both thought. You love him. So start there. That’s all you have to say to him. Because the way he walked out of here, he thinks you don’t even care. That was a man running from rejection.”

“You want me to go wrangle him back here.” Poppy stood, poised to do her bidding.

She chuckled, then groaned. “Damn it, Poppy. Stop making me laugh.”

“Sorry. I’m not trying to.”

“Leave him be. I can’t think with this pain in my back right now.”

“Rest.” Zinnia placed a hand on her arm and looked at Poppy. “We’re leaving so she can close her eyes.”

“Fine.”

She nearly laughed again at Poppy’s pouting, and closed her eyes. The silence was heavenly. It helped to shut out the pain. But it didn’t stop her mind from working in overdrive.

All her thoughts centered on Bryce.

Sweet, caring, lovable Bryce.

He smiled and waved at people as he left the hospital. The politician part of him was so ingrained into his behavior. But inside he was dying and crying at the loss of the best thing that ever happened to him.

Sure, she hadn’t outright rejected him. But her response had been clear. She didn’t want him, even if he was willing to follow her. And he would. It’d kill him to move away from the town he loved, from his friends and family, but for her, he would.

When he got to his car, he sat for a moment, wondering what to do. Where to go. He started the car, still unsure, but put the car in drive. He found himself parking at the cemetery twenty-five minutes later.

Not what he had planned, but then again, he hadn’t had any destination in his mind when he left. He needed to escape. From everything and everyone.

He made his way to Denise’s grave, staring at her headstone for the longest time. The tears still wouldn’t release. He didn’t feel that emotion bubbling to the surface at all. Not even an inkling. Not like he had back in the hospital with Lila. Back there, he couldn’t stop the tears, and damn it, he had tried!

“I don’t even hate you. I feel like I should after the way you treated me. I don’t just mean during the divorce. I mean, during our marriage. The constant putdowns. Belittling me. Making me feel like less of a man. I want to hate you for it.” He sighed. “But I think deep down, I feel sorry for you.”

A gust of wind blew in his face, then the air settled. A sign from Denise? A slap in his face? He wouldn’t be surprised. She wouldn’t have liked to hear him say he felt sorry for her. She’d never been physical with him. He wouldn’t have put up with that. But their conversations could get tense at times where he thought she wanted to take a swing at him. And he knew she knew he would’ve never hit her in return, so she had plenty of opportunities to reach out her hand with a solid smack.

“Lila asked me why I’d move to California for her and I would never do it for you. I think you know the answer to that.” He nodded as if she stood right in front of him. “You hurt me. Every single day of our entire marriage. Your words sliced me daily to the bone. You didn’t have to hit me physically to hurt me. Your words did that job just the same. The only way I could fight back was by not giving you what you truly wanted. Freedom from Sleighville.”

Another gust of wind hit his face, causing him to shiver.

“If that’s you, go ahead. Try and hurt me. It’s not going to work anymore. I won’t allow you to. I love Lila, and if she’ll have me, I will leave this town for her. Because I know she would never hurt me the way you did. Relationships need a give and take, and all you ever did was take, take, take. So I never wanted to give, give, give. I won’t apologize for that. I deserved better.” He gave a merciful laugh. “Honestly, Denise, you deserved better too. We married too young. If we would’ve waited, we would’ve known we weren’t meant for each other.

“I’m sorry the way things ended with us. I never wanted it to get to that point. As much as it pains me, I forgive you. Because holding in that rage isn’t helping me. Lila helped me to see that. I hope you are at peace wherever you are.”

Because Bryce couldn’t be sure she didn’t go to hell. She had treated him like he’d been living in his own hell. It would’ve been justified, but it didn’t mean he wished that kind of agony on her.

More breeze fluttered around him, but this time it wasn’t as forceful. As if Denise was accepting his forgiveness and offering a small dose of her own.

He turned to leave, flinching. Melody stood in front of him. He wondered how much she had heard, but not enough to ask.

“How’s Lila?” Melody offered a tiny smile. “I hope she’s okay. It’s horrible what happened. I can’t even process that Becca killed Denise.”

“Surgery went well. She’s awake and alert. In a lot of pain, but she’s going to be okay.”

“That’s so good to hear.”

“Is it?”

Melody winced.

“Be honest with me. You’re the one who sent the threatening notes to Lila, aren’t you?” Bryce knew deep in his gut that Becca had nothing to do with it. She might’ve killed Denise, but he didn’t believe it had been premeditated. Becca had a good heart, even if a rare ugliness had emerged in a heated moment. That left Melody as the culprit.

“Denise was my best friend. I loved her like a sister.” Melody’s lips drew into a tight line. “But I hated how she treated you. She never deserved you. I would’ve made you happy. I’ve loved you for so long, Bryce.”

“I never gave you the impression I returned those feelings.”

“Well, you might’ve if Lila hadn’t walked into the picture.”

“No, Melody,” he said through gritted teeth, “I would’ve never returned those feelings. It had nothing to do with Lila.”

She shrunk back and looked contrite. “I would’ve never actually hurt her. I was angry. I had to let it out somehow.”

“If you ever send her something again, you’ll regret it. Stay away from her. In fact,” Bryce said with a clipped tone, getting into her face, “stay away from me too. I doubt you’ll be welcome anywhere soon. You know how rumors spread around town.”

He walked around her, leaving her to stew on that. Not that he’d be the one to start the rumors, but it was a small town. Word would get out that she had threatened Lila. No one would take kindly to that.

He felt lighter when he re-entered his car. Not with regards to Lila and where their relationship stood, but about Denise. That closure Lila kept insisting he find, well, he did. The past could be put where it belonged. In the past.

He drove home and took a shower. Then he crawled into bed naked, promptly falling asleep.

Tomorrow would be a new day.

A loud pounding and constant ringing of his doorbell roused him out of a deep sleep. He dragged himself out of bed, fumbling for a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt, and ambled to the front door.

He groaned when he opened it to see Aster standing on his doorstep. Oddly, he was with Griffin and Duke.

“Where the hell have you been?” Aster snapped.

He gestured aimlessly to where his car was parked in the driveway, then slammed the door after the three of them walked inside. “I didn’t hide where I was.”

“I went to visit Lilac and imagine my surprise not seeing you there.”

Why the hell was Aster so mad at him? Lila wanted space. He gave her space. Ignoring Aster’s irate stare, he walked past them to the kitchen where he grabbed a beer from the fridge. This visit would require more than one.

Politeness was ingrained in him, so he offered all of them one as well. Everyone took a bottle, including Aster, who nearly drained it in one swallow.

“I think what Aster means to say is you left earlier this morning from the hospital and it’s now eight o’clock at night and you haven’t returned,” Griffin said.

“Is this some sort of weird intervention?” Bryce asked, waving at the three of them standing next to each other. “Because I don’t need one. I left to give Lila time to relax. I came home and fell asleep. I didn’t purposely stay away.”

“You proposed,” Aster accused him. “This time for real, I understand. So my sister doesn’t answer and you decide to be a dick and ignore her?”

Duke stepped up, putting himself between him and Aster before Bryce could step closer to him. “You heard him, Aster. He fell asleep. He didn’t leave her side all night long. He had to be exhausted. Give him a break.”

Duke and Aster shared a long look before Duke retreated back to his original spot.

Bryce took a long swallow from his beer and jerked a hand at Duke. “What he said. I might not have high hopes she returns the same sentiment, but I wouldn’t ignore her. Her wellbeing is my utmost priority. I fell asleep, and your loud banging woke me up. But if my presence causes her undo pain, I’ll stay away.”

“She wants you there, you idiot.” Aster finished his beer and slammed it on the table. “I can tell. She hasn’t voiced it, but I can tell it was bugging her that you didn’t return.”

“I’ll go see her soon. Maybe tomorrow. It’s getting late now.”

“You’ll—”

“You talked to Melody,” Griffin said, cutting off whatever Aster was about to spout off.

“I saw her at the cemetery.”

Duke frowned. “Why’d you go there?”

His eyes cast downward while he took another sip. Maybe he should’ve kept that part to himself. “Make peace with Denise, I guess. How do you know I talked to her?”

He hadn’t imparted that information to anyone. Hell, he hadn’t spoken to anyone since her at the cemetery.

Duke smiled. “She admitted it herself. Turned herself into the precinct for sending the threatening letters to Lila.”

“You’re charging her?” Bryce didn’t know what to think about that. The rumors alone would be enough penance, but it didn’t make him sad to see her being charged either. She had caused Lila—and him—to fear for her safety.

“Lila doesn’t want to press charges, so no,” Griffin answered.

So everyone had been to see Lila throughout the day but him. Now he felt like a cad. He hadn’t meant to stay away from her. The exhaustion had taken over.

“I don’t think she’ll be sticking around town for long though,” Duke added.

Bryce wouldn’t be surprised by her departure either. She wouldn’t be well liked around town. He even warned her of that.

“You’d move to California for my sister?”

He turned his full attention to Aster. “I’d move to the ends of the earth for your sister.”

“Then don’t keep being an ass and wait until tomorrow. Get your ass over there now.”

“Again, what Aster is trying to say is she’s worried about you,” Griffin said. Though Aster snorted at his response. “You don’t have to talk about love and relationships or anything. Check in with her. Let her know you’re okay.”

He set his unfinished beer on the counter and nodded. “Okay. I never meant to make her worry. I’ll go change.”

He wasn’t ready to see her again so soon. Her rejection was still a fresh wound. But if his absence was causing her pain, he’d rectify that problem immediately.