Chapter 15

15

When the loud alarm went off, she groaned and turned away from it. The sound miraculously turned off, and a warm arm slid around her waist, pulling her closer. They’d fallen asleep naked after a very thorough bout of lovemaking. Bryce’s cock was hard and pulsating against her ass, telling her he was ready for another round.

“I don’t want to leave this bed for a week,” he mumbled against the back of her head, swiping her hair out of the way before kissing her neck.

She twisted around in his arms, receiving a kiss on the lips. “Me either.”

“So I’ll call in today.”

Her eyes widened at the truth in the words. No joking tone whatsoever. “Absolutely not. I can handle some talk about us, but not a full-blown attack.”

His left hand cupped her back, pulling her even closer. A tender kiss hit her lips. “I don’t want to leave you. Not alone.”

She wiggled her hand out of being cocooned between their bodies and held his cheek. “I can come with you, if you don’t mind. You didn’t tell me how the St. Patrick’s Day event went. I know Easter is around the corner. There’s a lot of work to do.”

His eyes brightened at the idea. She enjoyed that look much more compared to the terror from moments before. “We didn’t exactly talk a lot last night.” He smothered her neck with kisses, making her giggle, yet relishing his touch and the playful manner.

He retreated, the happiness not as bright, and she knew a serious talk was coming.

“St. Patrick’s Day didn’t go as well as I hoped. We didn’t utilize your idea, and it irritated me, but I also didn’t speak up. I’ve been…” He twisted his lips, averting eye contact. “I haven’t been myself lately. And I hate that I acted the way I did. I have a lot of groveling and making up to do with the town.”

“We all have rough patches in life. Give yourself some grace, Bryce. It’s okay to fall apart sometimes.” She didn’t want to ask the next question, but she had to. They couldn’t have anything standing between them. Something that could tear them apart before they even began. “Have you even grieved for Denise?”

When he still wouldn’t make eye contact with her, she knew the answer.

“You need to do that.”

He shrugged. “I don’t know how. She died with too much tension hanging between us. A lot of hatred on both sides. I would’ve never gotten an apology from her for the way she treated me throughout our marriage—and the divorce. But now I don’t even get that chance to demand one. I don’t know what to feel. Sad? Angry? Heartbroken? I cried…” His gaze found hers. “I cried when you left. I tried to stop it, but the tears came anyway. I haven’t even found that kind of emotion for Denise. What does that say about me? Coldhearted and cruel. That’s what.”

She applied pressure to his cheek. “Never. You are the most kindhearted man I have ever met. You haven’t grieved yet because you’re bottling up too many emotions. You have to let it go. You don’t have to forgive Denise for anything she did to you because she died in a horrific way. But you should forgive yourself.”

He lifted her hand holding his cheek and kissed the inside of her wrist. Then he wrapped it with his hand, pressing them to his chest. “I don’t deserve you. I don’t feel like I deserve this happiness. I feel like…” He frowned. “I feel like I’m looking at someone’s life, jealous of what he has. I know you’re in my arms right now, but I’m afraid of it slipping away. That it won’t last. That it’s all in my head.”

“She really did a number on you. And that is unforgivable. She doesn’t deserve your forgiveness. I’ll never forgive her for what she put you through. But I need you to absolve yourself of any guilt. You did not do anything wrong.” She pressed her lips hard against him, hoping it would instill some of her strength into him. “You are not doing anything wrong. I’m real, and what’s happening between us is real.”

“You seem too good to be true. Sometimes, I think it was fate that you were the one who came to save our town.”

She winced. He was at it again, making her his savior. He noticed her reaction and went into panic mode. She knew because his heart rate sped up and his hand tightened around hers.

“What did I say wrong?”

“What happens when I can’t save this town? What does that do to you and me?”

His features relaxed and a soft chuckle slipped from his lips. “Nothing. We remain the same. I’m so sorry I said it that way.”

“It’s a lot of pressure on one person, Bryce. I felt it before I left. I don’t want to feel it again.”

He shook his head. “We’re in this together. I won’t say it again. I’ll make sure your boss knows that too.”

She cringed again, dipping her head to hide from him.

He kissed the top of her head, sighing. “I said something wrong again.”

“I don’t work for that company anymore.” Her voice was muffled because she still couldn’t look him in the eye.

“Why not?” He let go of her hand, forcing her to look at him. “What happened?”

His fingers still held her chin, not giving her the chance to avert her attention elsewhere. Well, they’d been honest with each other thus far, why stop now.

“He fired me. The first day I came home. Well, the second day when I reported to work for the first time. He blamed me for everything that happened.”

The fire lit up Bryce’s eyes. “He blamed you for receiving a death threat?”

She nodded once. The movement alerted Bryce he was still holding onto her chin in a firm grip. He relaxed it, bringing it to the back of her head and pulled her closer, placing a hard kiss to her forehead.

“I’m so sorry. I never meant for that to happen.”

She gave a helpless shrug. “I didn’t like the job much anyway. He gave me all the shit assignments.”

They stared at each other as she realized how that sounded.

“I mean, most of the assignments were shit. Not here though.”

A sweet grin lit up his face. “Of course not here. Why would you ever think that? It was the easiest job you had.”

Ha! She knew he was joking about that, so it didn’t require a response.

“Where do you work now?”

“I’ve been looking around but haven’t found anything yet. I’m jobless, Bryce. You’re starting a relationship with someone who has no part of her life together.”

His grin intensified to the point the happiness burst through his eyes. What was so happy about that statement? It pictured how pathetic she was.

“And you’re starting a relationship with a murder suspect. My life isn’t much better.”

That had her heart flipping in turmoil. “They don’t still think you killed her, do they?”

“Griffin’s cameras saved my ass. But I imagine I’m not off the suspect list. Nobody is.”

She hated to think anyone, especially the authorities, thought Bryce had anything to do with her murder. He would never. He wasn’t the violent type.

“But can we backtrack?”

She wasn’t sure she wanted to. Nothing they had been talking about was great. But she nodded anyway.

“You said we’re starting a relationship.”

“I did.” How else would he describe this? She wasn’t like Aster. Sleeping with someone for the hell of it and walking away like it didn’t matter. She was putting her heart on the line. Didn’t he understand that?

“Last night when I said we should take it to the bedroom, I thought maybe I moved too fast. I might be putting my foot in my mouth again, but…” He licked his lips. “But does starting a relationship mean you’re thinking about staying?”

When she decided to come back, no, that hadn’t been her intention.

“Because I want you to. I want you to stay in Sleighville.”

She didn’t know how to answer that. But she had to try. Only honesty would be between them from now on. No more holding in what they wanted to say.

“It means I don’t take what’s happening between us lightly. I don’t know what the future entails, but I’m willing to find out. I don’t want to upset you with false hope. Things are new and we should both make sure what’s happening is what we really want.”

“Right. Yes. Of course.”

His words said he agreed.

His eyes spoke the truth though. She didn’t say what he wanted to hear. He looked devastated and like she had crushed his heart.

“You haven’t even come to terms with Denise’s death. I don’t think we can move forward to something serious like you suggested until that happens. It’s not fair to me. Or to you.”

While she spoke with honesty, his eyes still betrayed him. He didn’t want to hear anything she said.

Bryce tried to push Lila’s words—honest and true—out of his mind as he got ready for work. He wanted her to shout it as loudly as she could that she would stay. That she would build a life with him.

Instead, she shot the idea down.

He understood why. It didn’t mean he liked it. He wasn’t ready to come to terms with anything concerning Denise. She was gone, and yet she was like a virus, still infecting his life at every turn.

He showered first, then she hopped in. He didn’t know if it was the serious conversation they had that put an awkwardness back between them, but he would’ve enjoyed it a lot more if they had showered together. But baby steps. They were heading in the right direction and the less he did to derail that, the better.

Coffee brewed and the food he wrangled up was ready by the time she emerged. She looked beautiful in a casual shirt and black pants. Her hair was down in soft waves with light makeup on. He could stare at her all day and soak up her beauty. Too bad he couldn’t.

“I would like you to come to work with me. I feel like we got sidetracked from that conversion.”

“It’ll look odd.”

He lifted his mug to his lips, taking a sip. “The city will hire you to help with the Easter event. Nothing odd about that.”

“I don’t work for a PR company though.”

“We’ll hire you as an independent consultant. The city will pay you directly.”

“If you’re sure…”

He hated the hesitation. Setting down his mug, some coffee spilled over the rim when he slammed it without intending to. He stalked to her, cupping her cheeks. “I’ve never been more sure about anything in my life.”

Technically, he was talking about them as a couple. But he’d let her think it was about the job.

She might not be ready to jump all in, but he was. He would show her every second of the day how much he wanted her in his life. Forever.

“Okay. Fine. We can do it that way, but remember, I don’t have all the answers to save this town.”

His mouth brushed across hers, letting the kiss linger. Hoping to erase all the tension he still felt in her body. As his tongue dove in and his arms circled around her, the kiss taking on a life of its own, he felt the agitation release from her body. She succumbed to the pleasure, and if they didn’t have to be at the office in twenty minutes, he would’ve swooped her into his arms and back to the bedroom.

“Just so you know, I don’t expect you to save the town. But your ideas are a hundred times better than the ones we come up with, so trust me when I say, we need you. I need you.” In every way possible. Of course, he kept that part to himself.

She nodded but didn’t add anything. He finished his coffee while she grabbed her own cup and some of the food he had prepared. They left ten minutes later.

Becca stood up as soon as she saw Lila walking next to him. “So wonderful to see you again, Lila. I didn’t realize you’d be here this morning.”

Bryce smiled wide, not an ounce of it fake. He felt on top of the world again. Lila was back, and nothing would ruin the newfound happiness he had been given. He had even shaved this morning, evening out his goatee so he looked like his normal self.

“She thought she’d surprise us.” He turned to her, grabbing a hold of her hand as he stared into her eyes. Hiding the desire was impossible. Why even try to mask it anymore? “I couldn’t be happier by her decision.”

Becca coughed, rousing him out of the trance he’d been in.

“Why don’t you get set up in my office, Lila, and I’ll grab us more coffee.”

She got a long, warm hug from Becca before entering his domain. He ventured to the break room, making them both a large cup. He knew it wouldn’t be the last one they had.

A throat behind him cleared.

He turned to find Becca waiting with an expectant look on her face. He figured she’d follow him, which was why he’d offered to get the coffee in the first place. Speaking to her without Lila around had to happen. She couldn’t know how difficult it might be to get the city to pay her. They were running out of funds as it was.

“Lila no longer works for the PR company. We will be paying her directly as an independent consultant.”

Becca’s brow rose as her lips pursed in a thin line.

Yes, he knew it wouldn’t be easy.

“Please find a way. Somehow. I don’t care how.” There was no use hiding the plea in his tone. He needed this to happen. He had to show Lila in every possible way she belonged here. With him. With the town.

“That’s asking a lot, Bryce. I don’t know if it’s possible.” She propped her hands on her hips. “What title do I give her? Independent consultant doesn’t explain much. What is she consulting?”

He tossed his shoulders up. “How about social media expert? Or something along those lines. She’s going to be doing what she did before, but not with the PR company behind her back.”

“Harper handles all the social media. You know that. Try again.”

Why was Becca giving him a hard time about this? She liked Lila. At least, he had thought so.

“Is there a problem here, Becca?” His tone went from cordial to dangerous in a blink of an eye. He wouldn’t have anyone treating Lila like shit, not even his closest confidant at work.

She stepped closer, erasing the irritation and replacing it with sympathy. “Did you know today is the first day you arrived with a smile on your face? In over a month.”

He hadn’t been keeping track of how often he lifted his mouth upward like that. But if she said so, then it meant it was true.

“The day she left, you did too. You’ve been a person I didn’t even recognize.” She reached out and brushed his cheek as if she had the right to touch him like that. “You shaved. Your eyes look brighter. Even your clothes aren’t wrinkled.”

Wow. Really? Had he been so bad that he didn’t even bother to wear decent clothes? He’d been so far gone in the depths of hell he hadn’t noticed all the ways he’d faltered in his appearance.

“I have no problem whatsoever with Lila. In fact,”—a brilliant smile lit up her face—“I want to hug her for eternity for bringing life back into you. So damn easily too. And if the way you grabbed her hand means what I think it means, it’s about damn time.”

There was that stern expression again, as if she wanted to ream him for waiting so long to declare his feelings to her.

“The problem I have is the city is broke. I don’t have the funds to pay her, even though I can see the desperation on your face that it needs to happen. No amount of me finagling and wording something in a specific way will change that.”

He had done one right thing in his marriage. Keep separate accounts. While Denise wormed her way into his good graces now and again and he spoiled her, she never had full control of his money.

“I’ll provide the money and you pay her with that.”

She narrowed her eyes. “And if she finds out…how will that make her feel?”

He leaned closer, whispering, “I’ll worry about that later. Right now, I need her by my side, and not because it makes me happy, which she does. But she was threatened again. I will die before I let anyone hurt her.”

“No one else is dying around here.” She shooed him away from the coffee machine. “Go away. I’ll finish this. If she needs some serious convincing to stay in town, we have our work cut out for us. You handling the coffee isn’t doing us any favors.”

He laughed as he stepped away from the area. He never knew he could make coffee wrong, but who was he to argue with the woman who ran his work life like a captain on a ship.

“I’m glad you’re on my side.”

Becca looked him square in the eye. “Always. With everything. It might not seem like it, but this entire town is on your side. We always have been.”