Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1

Windy

"Taryn, no. I don't want to. Seriously, can you just… not?" I know my begging is falling on deaf ears because my best friend and teammate continues digging through my closet for party clothes she's not going to find.

"Seriously Win, you own literally nothing but soccer shorts and t-shirts. This is sad. Like, super sad."

Taryn's got on a pair of shorts that are so tight and brief they're actually shorter than the undershorts I wear under my uniform and a tank top with fringe along the bustline that shows off her rack. The impossibly long legs that make her a star on the soccer pitch stretch endlessly between the panty-length end of her shorts and the wedges with ballet-slipper straps tied around her calves.

"Totally sad. I should just skip the party and stay here, mourning my lack of wardrobe. Go on without me; it's a sacrifice, but one I'm willing to make." I toss my hand in the air, tapping the back of my wrist to my forehead and pretending to faint.

"Drama queen. Get up. You're coming with me."

She laughs. I don't.

The social scene at University of Mariposa is wild. Especially for a school landlocked in Nebraska and without a reputation as a party campus. Not that the lack of beaches, ski resorts, or pretty much anything other than cornfields stops my fellow students from treating every Saturday night like it's spring break and Mardi Gras rolled into one.

And look, it's not that I'm antisocial or opposed to parties. I actually love hanging out with friends and having a good time. It's just, my idea of a good time is pretty much the polar opposite than that of my cohort.

"Really though, I need someone there with me tonight. Someone I trust."

"Well, that's cryptic. I don't want to get tangled in your shenanigans, T. I barely avoided getting in trouble with you for your last stunt, and I wasn't even there!" I whine.

Something's going on with my bestie lately. She went from dedicated athlete whose focus was solely on the team and her classes, to constantly pissing off our coach, seemingly deliberately. And I love the girl, I really do, but this is our senior year, and I can't afford to screw up. Just thinking about the risks she's been taking and what could motivate her to push so hard for me to go to this party with her has my anxiety ratcheting up.

"Please, Windy. I really need you to go with me. Besides, you need to live a little. Get out there and have some fun. Hook up with the first non-dudebro you find. When's the last time you even kissed a guy?"

She doesn't need an answer, because Taryn was there drying my tears and hyping me up after the last breakup I went through. I bite my tongue, but reach for my shoes. A party might be the last place I feel like spending my night, but a good teammate never lets a friend down.

"Fine. I'll go. But I'm not changing." I gesture to my black yoga pants and baggy sweater over a t-shirt with the team logo on it. "It's this or nothing."

"Ohh, so wearing nothing is an option? Sounds kinky. Maybe you will meet a guy tonight and brown chicken, brown cow." Taryn thrusts her hips in the air like an absolute goof, mimicking a two-person activity I haven't indulged in since the aforementioned breakup.

"Unlikely." I snort, grabbing my water bottle and tossing back one of my prescription anxiety meds. I've been doing good lately about limiting my reliance on the medication to help me get through situations that cause my panic attacks. Tonight won't be a night I can skip taking my pill though. I already know the frat house hosting the party is going to be a zoo filled with drunken, horny college kids.

Taryn's comment about meeting someone tonight rattles around in my head. Lately I've been thinking more and more that dating guys my age is why things inevitably go to crap. College guys want to go to parties and clubs. They want to dance and drink and get rowdy.

Meanwhile the perfect night for me involves ordering dinner delivery and putting together a new Lego set while superheroes battle the villains and blow stuff up on the television mounted above my desk.

I sigh and give my current build-in-progress a resigned look. By the time we make it back to the dorms tonight, there's no way my eyes will be able to focus on the fiddly stickers that need to be added to the bricks that go into place next. Maybe I can get the pieces prepared for placement when practice is done tomorrow morning.

"Alright, bestie. Let's go. Can't leave until we arrive, so hustle up and let's do this thing." I open the door and usher Taryn into the hall.

"Gee, Win. Try not to sound so enthusiastic." Taryn's teasing isn't mean-spirited.

"Ah, a party. We will have so much fun," I deadpan, giving her a wink and threading my arm through hers.

At least we'll be there together. Spending time with my best friend isn't a bad thing, and I remind myself that after this year when we graduate and have to face the world of adulthood, nights like these will be good memories to have.