Chapter 6

MARGARET

I'm having the strangest dream. I know it's a dream because Hank is walking at my side. We're on some kind of a path. It's all kind of vague. The edges of my vision are a blur but we've been walking together for a while and it feels as if I'm reliving our life together.

Moments become clear. Important moments and little ones that to anyone else might have meant nothing, but to me they were as precious as diamonds. The fights we had, which were plenty, are blurry passages as we walk but he points to each moment and says something, though I can't hear the words.

It doesn't matter because I know Hank. I know what he would say at each thing and though I can't hear him, I do know his voice. His thoughts. He was a good man. A man I loved. Ours wasn't a magical love, it was one built by time and work from mutual respect and care.

As we approach what I know is the end my heart begins to palpitate. I don't want to go through this again. I'm scared and I cannot deny it. Until the ship crashed it was the darkest, worst experience of my entire life. I was faced with the unknown. Who was I without him? How was I supposed to do all the things we did together alone? Caring for the kids, grandkids, handling all the little aspects of life that either he had done or we had done together.

I was alone. It didn't matter that the kids and grandkids, only two of them and tiny as they were at that time, gathered close. Even though I was surrounded by others I felt as if there was nothing but emptiness. The days in the wake of his passing were black blurs of going through motions without really being engaged.

"Marg," Hank says, stopping at my side. "You did great. I'm sorry, but you're fine and you're going to be fine."

Tears run down my face as he speaks for the first time that I actually hear him. He has both my hands in his, squeezing them tight. There is a pressure against my back. It's not an unpleasant pressure. Cool, somehow soothing, just something I become aware of.

"Hank," I sob. "I've missed you."

"I know dear," he says. "And I appreciate it, but you know I never wanted you to be alone. Why would I do that to you? I've moved on in the universe. You must too. Open your heart Marg…"

His voice echoes and stretches as the world does the same. My arms are getting longer and longer as I try to hold onto his hands but he's moving away and as he does it's all fading. The world shimmers and something is pulling on me. The coolness on my back increases and suddenly it's all I'm aware of.

Everything is black. I'm sure my eyes are open but I can't see. Panic surges but I focus on breathing and push that down. I blink several times, hoping to see clearly. There is some light, but it's very dim. Okay, I'm not blind. Good.

Then I hear a soft rumbling sound. Is that… no… could it be…. snoring?

Hank snored. I must still be in the dream. Who would be snoring. Wait. Am I? Where are my clothes?

And is that… it is. There's an arm over my waist. An arm. Then… it must be….

Mohlad stirs, mumbles something, then spoons against me tighter. In that instant, I'm very, very aware that he and I are both very, well, uhm, naked.