Chapter 9

Mora

Asmile crosses my face as Mom hurries into the suite, wrapping me up in a tight hug. It calms my wildly beating heart and more than ever, I need to talk to her, convince her to help me get away from Cole. The last three weeks have been enough to drive me insane. The last week and a half even worse because Cole simply thinks I’m testing him, his responses to see how far I can push him before he’ll break, when in fact it’s the complete opposite.

Every word I’ve uttered to him is the absolute truth. I don’t want him touching me in any way, friendly or not.

I will never let myself want it, even if his scent does let me sleep with ease. If he ever knew the truth it certainly wouldn’t, would only terrify me more because his reaction to it…is bound to be worse than when he was trying to get Sammy and Ryan away from me that first day. Only this time it’d be turned on me and I won’t ever let another shifter hurt me.

“Oh sweetie, I’ve missed you,” Mom says, cupping my cheeks staring intently at me, and a little frown crosses her face at whatever she seems to find. “Are you feeling okay?”

“Fine, I’m still sore but normally only after going up and down all the stairs to get up here,” I tell her, forcing out a fake smile before Dad and the boys come into the suite, turning it real.

“There’s my girl,” Dad says, pulling me in for a long hug, and I fight against the tears that form wishing I could stay in his safe hold forever. To go back to when I was five and be wrapped in this hug as he assured me he’d always love his little girl after Henry was born.

“Hey Sis,” Ryan says, butting his way in for one of his own followed by Denny and Henry, and I can’t help but really smile as the day progresses. Dad, the boys, Cole, Edgar, Evan, and Reed, Edgar’s oldest son, bring in all of the family’s things, as I lounge on the balcony with Mom and a warm sweater. The September weather here is nothing like back home, not when ice capped mountain peaks surround us on all sides.

“How are things going with you and Cole?” Mom asks as the men head down for another load.

“What things?” I state, turning my face to look at her. “There is nothing happening between us and there never will be.”

“Oh sweetie, I’d hoped…”

“What? That you and Dad would get here, and I’d be all la-di-da in love with him? That I’d forget who and what he is and let him put some stupid non-existent claim on me?” I question, hating the way her face falls but I can’t begin to let Cole get closer to me. I’d rather live without a partner, without kids, than ever risk my life by telling that brute anything about what happened.

“Why are you fighting this so much, Mora? Cole is your mate. Not the one we’d hoped you’d find based on his reputation but with everything Sammy’s told us, we’d hoped that his reputation was only half earned.”

“Well it’s not,” I tell her, needing her on my side before I try to convince Dad on this. “He’s a cold-hearted monster and I’d rather never get married and have kids than ever be forced to be his mate. He may be able to put up a front, but that’s all it is—a front. I can see him for who he really is and that’s the monster that showed up to attack the pack, not caring who got hurt in the process. He’s nothing to me and never will be. I’d rather have died—at graduation or that day than ever be forced to be his.”

“Mora don’t say that, sweetie,” Mom says, tears in her eyes as she reaches for me, holding me close, and I almost feel guilty for everything I said hearing the heavy footsteps heading away from us. The lingering warmth from Cole’s presence in the suite fades, and I rest in Mom’s arms, until the men have the last items inside the suite.

Cole doesn’t reappear and I spend the evening with my family, pretending I don’t even notice it. Then do the same for the next three days when he doesn’t stop by or message me once. I fight to ignore the part of me that starts to miss him on the fourth day, while pretending to be surprised that we haven’t seen Cole in days.

“Really? I guess that’s why it’s been so nice,” I muse when it’s just me, Mom and Dad. They boys are all at school, having started now that they’re officially here, and someone else is around to watch over me relieving Sammy of the responsibility of it day in and day out.

“Mora, sweetie, why are you so against this? Refusing to admit or believe that Cole is your mate?” Mom asks pulling a sigh from me.

“I already told you, Mom. He’s a cold-hearted brute that only wants and does what he wants. I’ve seen him around here when he doesn’t think anyone’s watching him and it’s clear that he’s just as bad as Thomas was. Not surprising since his mother was Thomas’ true mate,” I add shocking both of them. “He didn’t tell you all that, did he?”

“No, his mother was Elaine?” Dad asks and I nod, pulling a ‘huh’ from deep inside him.

“He attacked Thomas to get back at him because thanks to Thomas’ rejection of her, she got sick and died when he was four. His father was a bear shifter, and his clan didn’t like that Cole was a wolf instead of a bear and threw him out after his father died. He spent years killing for the sole purpose of taking down Thomas and it turned him into a true monster. Is that the kind of man you honestly think I should spend my life with?” I question them.

“No, not if that’s truly all he is,” Dad says and I start to feel a bit of hope appear that maybe, just maybe, I can get out of this place soon. “I understand his desire, his need to avenge his mother, especially against Thomas, because the man toyed with Elaine before rejecting her. He used her for physical pleasure but would never put his claim on her, honey. When he finally sent her away, she was beaten down, so much I’m amazed she mated with anyone to have a child. Mixing that with his father’s clan not accepting him because he was a wolf instead of a bear…I can see why he’d focus on avenging his mother and father. Without a mate, he had nothing to believe in, to love and trust, become the leader he was meant to be with her beside him, so he let his anger and rage guide him, but honey, that all changed when he found you. He could have killed me, but he didn’t. Because of you, he didn’t do every bit of what he’d intended that day. That tells me that he can change, become the type of mate that’s deserving of you, if you give him the chance.”

“So the fact that he was prepared to kill someone a week and a half ago simply for not speaking shouldn’t bother me? I should just let him put his dirty hands on me and trust that he won’t be an evil monster when it comes to me?” I push, needing them to agree to helping me get away now, not weeks or months from now.

“Depends on the circumstances, honey,” Dad says, and I shake my head at them, moving down to my room and lay back on the bed, frustrated tears slipping from my eyes.

“Sweetie,” Mom says joining me, brushing them away. “I know it seems strange, but I promise, if you give him a chance I’m sure he’ll prove that all he wants is to make you happy, do what’s best for you.”

“How? Because that’s what Dad did with you? Dad is the exception, not the norm, Mom,” I argue, making her brow lift in surprise. “Name me one, just one couple that wasn’t toxic, that actually was loving and supportive. You can’t because there aren’t any. You might have lucked out with Dad, but do you honestly expect me to risk my life to see if lightning strikes twice? Or will you be okay if I end up like Emily, or how about Polly? Or Anna?” I add making her suck in a breath that I feel bad about, but I need them behind me when I tell Cole I will never become his mate and I’m leaving.

“Mora, you can’t use the alpha couples back home as examples of what true mates look like, honey,” Dad says from the doorway. “Thomas refused to allow the alphas to take less than a full blood mate after I found your mother. He hated how connected we were, that my loyalty was to her and you before him. His father was just as bad, preferring for full blood alphas to mate rather than wait or find their true matches, and that is why so many of them fought and argued so often.”

“And I’m supposed to just believe that Cole will never turn on me? That he’ll never let the monster inside him out towards me because I’m supposed to be his ‘true match’?” I demand shaking my head at them. “Well I’m sorry, but I don’t trust him, or this supposed fated mates crap. I don’t trust him or any of the others out there. I haven’t for a lot longer than the last three weeks too,” I add pulling their attention back my way, the surprise noticeable on both of their faces. “If I wasn’t attacked at graduation, I wouldn’t have even been there that day. I should be at college surrounded by humans right now, not stuck out here in the middle of these stupid ice-capped mountains, freezing my ass off because my supposed mate doesn’t get that I’m not a damn shifter and can’t keep myself warm like the rest of them can. If they hadn’t attacked us, I’d still have been out of there the second I was able to take care of myself, because the last place I want to live is with shifters for the rest of my life. I will never accept Cole as my mate—never. I’d rather kill myself than have that monster ever touch me.”

“Oh sweetie,” Mom says, hugging me as the tears fall, but it’s the way Dad turns towards the front room that says I didn’t imagine the warmth that hit suddenly, or the familiar scent deepening. Cole must have been coming to check on us and heard who knows how much of my little tirade.

Maybe that’s a good thing though. Maybe, he’ll throw us out rather than having to wait to get my parents on my side.

Three more days pass by without a single sighting of Cole, at least not by me. Any time my brothers or Dad try to bring him up, I simply leave the room, and they drop it, not wanting me hiding away from them. I wake early on Saturday, unable to get back to sleep and make my way down to the gazebo just before sunrise.

My sleeping patterns have started to return to normal since I’ve been here, and the sunrises are gorgeous, but I’ve avoided them in order to avoid Cole in the last two weeks. Today though, I want to enjoy one, because it may very well be my last here, and as much as I want to leave, I’ll miss the beauty of them. The colors they create in the sky and on the mountains is stunning, something I’d savor every day under different circumstances.

I wrap the throw blanket further around myself, watching as the sky brightens, the cold for once not bothering me. The pinks melt into reds and purples, showing off the stunning landscape the gods created, and a soft smile hits my lips as I sigh.

The sound of approaching footsteps pulls a little groan from me. The last thing I want is to be bothered right now, by anyone, including my family.

“Mora,” Cole says, surprising me that it’s him and not my Dad or brother.

“What?” I respond, not turning to look at him. His tone isn’t filled with fury, rather her sounds hurt and upset, and I don’t like that it makes feel bad.

“We need to talk, and I don’t think it should be where others can overhear,” he states, and I reluctantly get up, turning to face him.

“About what?”

“Us,” he answers me, and the way he says it, I may just be getting what I wanted.

“Fine,” I say with a sigh, rolling my eyes at him for added benefit.

The last place I want to go with him is to his suite, but it’s better than where I’ve been staying with my family there. They’re bound to be on Cole’s side and telling them the truth…that’s not going to happen any more than I’m going to tell it to Cole.

His suite is filled with his scent, making it feel warmer than it really is, and I hate that it can affect me at all. That any of it is a comfort because it just makes it harder to force myself away from it. It’s only with the worst memories running through my head that I can push it down, remember what I’ll face if Cole learns the truth.

“You’re the one that wanted to talk, so talk,” I state when he stands there, simply staring at me with a hurt look on his face. “I’ve nothing to say to you and it seemed as though you’d finally realized it the past few days.”

“Few?” he says, his tone growing harder which is easier to handle than the hurt. “Do you even know how many days it’s been since I saw you, spoke to you?”

“Three, four maybe?” I offer with a shrug. “I wasn’t counting, merely enjoying the time with my family.”

“Eight! Eight days, dammit,” he growls at me, his face growing darker, and I lift my chin, not backing down from the anger there.

“Well, excuse me for not realizing. It wasn’t any skin off my nose not being forced to be in your presence,” I mock, certain if he does let his anger out my way, lays a single hand on me, my parents will take me out of here instantly. It might be worth a bit of pain to get what will keep me alive in the end.

“I told you once to be careful how far you push me, test me, Mora,” he says stalking over to reach me and I jerk away from him when he reaches for my arm.

“I’m not testing you. I’ve honestly been relieved not to see you or be around you Cole. I hate you, everything about you, so why would I ever want to be near you?” I question, amazed when instead of lunging for me, he runs his hand down his face instead, dragging in a deep breath. “I’ve told you from the start that I don’t want you, don’t want to be your mate. So why can’t you just accept that not having seen you for however many days it’s been, has been a relief?”

“Because you’re my mate. Dammit Mora, do you have any idea how hard it’s been to stay away from you, to give you some space, not be in your presence? You grew up with shifters—jackass ones yes, but they were still shifters, and a mate is the one thing that you can’t give up,” Cole demands glaring harder at me.

“Seems that’s not true given how easily Thomas threw your mother away, or how many others just up and left—or more likely killed their mates when they were done with them,” I counter and Cole’s expression both widens and tightens in shock at the same time.

“My mother died because of Thomas throwing her away,” he states, his tone dark and hard, “so watch what you say about her. As for the rest, true matches don’t just walk away from their mates, and they certainly don’t kill them unless they’ve completely lost their minds and turned rabid. Whatever the hell you saw at Thomas’ pack wasn’t what real mates are like, Mora. They’re like your mom and dad. Your dad loves her so much that he was willing to die to protect you and you’re not even his blood. Their bond is so strong that to lose you would destroy your mother, which would destroy him. That is what true mates would do for one another, what I’d do for you.”

“The hell you would,” I scoff. “You’re the worst type of man out there. One little thing doesn’t go your way and you’d be more apt to kill me yourself and don’t think you wouldn’t. You’re the alpha, the he-man, who spent how many years to get revenge on the man that hurt you? Because kid yourself all you want, but you weren’t avenging your mother or your father. You were getting revenge against him because your mother died, and your clan threw you out when you weren’t what they wanted. You wanted to prove your wolf was greater than his, to make him regret what he did, and if I ever did anything you didn’t like or approve of, wounded your damn pride, you’d taken me out in an instant.”

“Do you think you haven’t wounded my pride already? That your refusal to accept that you’re mine, to stay in my suite, to be near me, let alone being fine going eight days without seeing or talking to me, telling your parents that I’m nothing but a monster in your opinion hasn’t sent me there yet? That thinking you’re happier without me in your life doesn’t stick a knife in my gut and twist it?” he questions, and I shrug, unable to speak because the depth of the hurt in his tone hits deep inside me. “Answer me, Mora. Do you honestly think you haven’t pushed me to the breaking point already? Because I can guarantee it has and I spent half the night awake, thinking I should just let you go. That if I did, maybe it wouldn’t hurt nearly as much, but then I woke up, saw you out there, sitting in the gazebo looking perfectly content, and I couldn’t do it. I can’t let you go without a fight, so tell me. Give me one good reason why you refuse to be my mate. One real reason and not this bullshit that you’re worried that I might go off the deep end and do something stupid, hurt you. Because if you can’t, I sure as hell will not let you walk out of here.”

“You want a reason? Okay, how about this…I’m not a virgin,” I state, stopping his feet short as he crosses the room towards me.

“You’re what?” he says, his entire body radiating with anger. His hands clench and unclench over and over, his eyes darkening, until that electric blue was just a tiny little ring around the black, his face lengthening, his hair growing longer as his wolf started to press forward.

“I’m not a perfect little virgin for you,” I tell him again, holding my breath as his wolf surges forward again.

“Who is he? Is he the reason you won’t be mine? You want him and won’t let yourself be consumed by what’s between us?” he demands stalking over to me, and every muscle in my body tightens to control the absolute disgust his words build within me. The thought of ever being touched like that again by them makes me want to puke.

“It’s none of your damn business who I’ve slept with or who I want to sleep with. You’re nothing to me, Cole,” I retort, holding his gaze as I fight to keep the truth hidden deep down the way I have for over two years now.

“The hell it isn’t! You’re mine. My mate and like hell I’m letting someone else have what’s mine. You’ll tell me who he is, who you gave what’s mine to,” he growls, his arm wrapping around my waist pulling me up against his huge, hard body, and the panic fully engulfs me, making me fight.

My hands push at his chest as I twist, trying to get away from his hardness pressing against my stomach. Little screams fall as he picks me up, my legs kicking out, trying my hardest to get free as blackness begins to descend over me, claiming me whole as Cole’s hand lifts to the back of my neck.