Chapter Eight

As soon as we step into the burger place, a pang of nostalgia washes over me. My dad would have loved it here. The first thing I notice is a Back to The Future poster. He loved those movies. The second thing I observe is that Kyson is here with his butthead friends. So much for whatever spat they were having yesterday.

Boys are weird and more dramatic than girls tend to be. Girls are catty by nature, but guys are hard to get a read on. They bottle everything up until it explodes into chaos. I push my shoulders back and follow Lauren to a table away from them, pretending I don't notice their presence.

She introduces me to some of her friends, but I'm too distracted to really pay them much attention. I can barely keep it together long enough to order my food. I glance around the restaurant with a knot of anxiety looping in my lower belly. I wish I was oblivious to the tension crackling between Kyson and me.

I've felt his eyes on me since I walked through the door. It's unnerving wondering if he's going to try something. I'm sure he'd love nothing more than to make a scene and embarrass me.

The knot forming in my stomach continues to grow with each passing second.

Matt hasn't texted me all day and I shouldn't worry, but what if Kyson did something like send him that stupid fake picture? I twist my fingers together under the table, trying to resist the urge to text Matt again. The guilt of what I did last night weighs on me.

Lauren and her friend chatter about some party that's happening tomorrow night. I nod along, but my mind is elsewhere–specifically where it shouldn't be. On Kyson and his jerk friends.

"Hey." Lauren squeezes my forearm. "You okay? You seem a million miles away."

"Yeah," I lie, forcing a smile. "Just hungry, since I skipped out on lunch."

"Good thing our food will be here soon, then." She grins, trying to lighten the mood. "They have the best fries. Perfect ratio of salt and grease."

Right on cue, the server arrives with our order. "One bacon cheeseburger," he announces, setting the plate in front of me. He's cute, but too old for any of us. He has to be in his mid-twenties, and he has some serious ink on his neck and on his forearms.

Lauren beams at him, but I can't help glancing over my shoulder to the other side of the room, to where Kyson goofs off with his friends.

Even from here, I can tell he's staring back at me. His dark blue eyes linger on my face, making my heart race. Part of me wants to march right over to his table and tell him to leave me the hell alone. Another part of me wants to hide, to avoid the inevitable confrontation that would follow. Then there's the other part of me that I need to bury down deep, because that piece of me wonders if he's been thinking about our stolen kisses.

I stop staring before he accuses me of stalking him or something.

"Let's eat," I say, more to distract myself than anything else. We eat in silence for a moment, the weight of my thoughts pressing down on me. I can't rid myself of the image of Kyson from last night when we were alone and the sadness in his eyes when he'd thought I wasn't paying attention.

There's more to him than the persona he puts on for everyone else. I shouldn't care or want to dig deeper below the surface to find out what makes him tick. I know I can't fix him or save him from himself and yet I want to try.

"Okay. Out with it," Lauren mumbles, pausing with a half of a chicken tender dangling between her lips. "Something's bugging you. You've barely said five words since we left school."

"Guess I'm not the best company today." I pick at my burger and take a small bite while I glance at my phone. "I'm just…thinking."

"Okay. Well, I'm a great listener if you want to talk about something or someone," she presses gently, looking toward Kyson.

"Not Kyson. I'm stressing about Matt," I admit, finally voicing my concerns. "I'm not sure what's going on with him, but he hasn't messaged all day. He's confusing."

"Wait. Who is Matt?"

"Sorry. He's my boyfriend." I shove a fry in my mouth as heat floods my cheeks.

"Your boyfriend," she parrots, wearing a frown.

"We've been together forever. It's only I'm here, and he's away at college." I sigh. "We're in a weird place. Things are so different and the distance. It's hard."

"It's possible he's busy," Lauren's friend Casey suggests. I'd almost forgotten she was here. I'm so wrapped up in my own issues. "Or maybe he's afraid of smothering you while you're trying to adjust."

"Or maybe he's plotting how to end things," I counter. The bitterness in my voice turns my stomach. He should break up with me. He deserves better.

Within hours of being with Kyson, I was ready to let him defile me. While I'd like to blame it on hormones or jetlag I can't because I'd let him do it again.

"Whatever it is," Lauren starts, shooting me a timid smile, "just keep in mind that you're awesome and you don't need any guy to define your worth or happiness."

"Thanks," I whisper, touched by how sweet her words are, considering she barely knows me. "I'll try to remember that."

"Good. Now onto important things."

"Like what?"

"Eating these fries before they get cold." She laughs and Casey shakes her head.

"Oh cute. Look at all the nerds together," Britney says, snippily as she and her friends pass by our table.

I roll my eyes. "Cute that you think your opinion is relevant," I snap back and Lauren high fives me as Britney makes an awkward face before taking off.

I munch on my fries, unable to resist stealing one last glance at Kyson's table. His eyes meet mine, and for a moment, all my doubts and fears are forgotten. All that remains is the electric connection between us, crackling with potential and daring me to give as good as I get and torture him back.

My phone pings with a text from Matt and I look away, burying my feelings beneath a mountain of fries and denial.

I don't want to hate Kyson.

Not even a little bit.

The thought should scare me. And yet it doesn't.

"Why does Kyson Allen keep staring at our table?" Casey questions, tucking her curly red hair behind her ear.

"That's because Dahlia lives with him."

"Really? Wow," she says breathily. "What's that like?"

"Annoying, but it's been one day. I'm sure we will find our normal soon."

"Girl, nothing about that guy is normal. So, are you like his stepsister or something?"

"Or something," I mutter, taking a big bite of my burger.

"He's your cousin by marriage. Is that right?" Lauren angles her head toward me.

"Kind of. His stepfather was my dad's stepbrother. So technically, we aren't related. They just happen to be my last resort. I don't really have anyone else." My stomach dips and I have to bite back my tears as the reminder that my father is dead hits me square in the chest. No matter how many times I hear the words or think them, they never truly sink in because each time it's like hearing the news for the first time all over again.

Shock. Sadness. Anger. Grief. All those emotions are always swirling inside me, but when I look at or think about Kyson all those terrible sensations disappear.

"Speaking of the devil," Laurens whispers, nudging me on the elbow.

"I'm about to head out. Save Lauren the drive and ride with me." Kyson stares at me with those intense eyes, challenging me to say no. I bet he'd love to make a scene in front of my new friends.

"Yeah. Sure. Whatever. I need to grab my bag from her car, though."

"It's unlocked," she says, wearing the cheesiest grin.

"Let me give you some money for my food."

"I already paid your tab," Kyson informs me.

"You didn't have to do that. I'll pay you back." I suck down the last of my soda.

He rubs his lips together and my cheeks warm as my mind flashes to kissing him. "It's not a big deal." He shrugs. "You ready?"

"Yeah. Sure. Later," I tell Casey and Lauren. As we exit the restaurant, my phone rings with a video call request from Matt. Guilt washes through me as I hit ignore. There's no way I'm answering with Kyson next to me.

"What did Britney say to you?" He questions once we are in his car.

"Nothing important."

"I'll tell her to lay off you."

"I can fight my own battles."

"Okay. Where were you at lunch?"

"Why?"

"I wanted you to sit with me." He squeezes my upper thigh.

"Kyson, this has to stop. I have a boyfriend."

"Who isn't here."

"And what about John and your mom? What would they think?"

He rolls his eyes. "You're a real buzzkill."

"And you're a real asshole."

He flashes his dimpled smile my way. Not his real smile, but the one he uses to get his way. The one capable of breaking hearts.

"You coming to the game tomorrow?" he hedges, pulling out a cigarette.

I scrunch up my nose at him. "Doubtful. I need to unpack."

"That's boring."

"I might check out that party though," I say, surprising both of us.

"What party?"

"The one everyone won't stop talking about." I fake a cough and wave my hand as smoke fills the car.

"Right," he mutters, and I notice we're driving in the opposite direction of the house.

"Where are we going?"

"I need to make a pit stop. Do me a favor when we get there. Stay in the car and lock the doors."

"Okay…but why? Are you taking me to a drug deal or something?" I laugh, but he doesn't return the sentiment. "Kyson. Tell me you're joking."

"Just gotta grab some weed for the party. It's not a big deal."

"Then why do I need to lock the doors?"

"Only a precaution." He flicks his cigarette out the window then shoves a piece of gum in his mouth.

We go across the railroad tracks that separate the two sides of the town. Where the other side, aka the poor people live according to Kyson. People we'd never associate with publicly because they can't afford to attend the same school as us. People like my friends back home. I don't know if he really views them that way or if it's all for show for his friends.

He pulls up to a sketchy trailer with cardboard duct taped over some of the windows. I notice the red blinking light of a camera aimed at the spot we are parked in. Cool. They can afford a security system but not windows.

Kyson twists toward me, taking on a serious expression. "Lock the doors and don't open them for anyone but me."

"Noted."

"Don't act weird or be on your phone. Just sit and wait."

"You're freaking me out. What kind of place is this?" I ask, even though deep down, observing the scene, I don't need to. It's a drug den.

"You'll be fine."

"I don't like this, Kyson." I stare past him where an angry dog tied to a chain that's looped around a tree barks its head off, practically foaming at the mouth to take a hunk out of something like Kyson's rear.