11. Noelle

noelle

. . .

I thought about leaving Ash and Cody a note before departing their den in the moon boots I’d found still intact amongst my shredded clothes, a huge coat that smelled like Mak, and nothing else. But in the end, I decided against it.

Only a couple of days had passed since I’d left Gemidgee, but I’d woken up that morning feeling Noelle in every sense of the French word for Christmas—happy and hopeful for the day to come. Also, strangely healed.

At least, I had in those first blissful moments of waking.

Then I’d seen the rays of morning light streaming through the cave window and remembered everything: the crash, the bite, the estrus, and the three ridiculously sexy bear shifters waiting for me to choose them—or not.

Forget the poetic stuff. I’d literally woken up to a new day, and my sister, Holly, had to be worried sick about me.

I needed my phone to call her and let her know I was alright—just… detoured. That was my goal as I tiptoed past Cody’s massive bear form and grabbed the first coat I came across. Totally not on purpose.

Mak’s coat smelled just as good as Cody’s and Ash’s. I’d already reveled in Cody’s warm cinnamon and Ash’s fresh-roasted coffee scents, but now my bear was practically drooling over the smoky, campfire marshmallow aroma clinging to this one.

But as I made my way toward the road, I couldn’t stop thinking about Mak. His tragic backstory. The way his coat smelled. And, most of all, the way his eyes had burned when he looked at me—as if I were both a blessing and a burden he couldn’t bring himself to carry.

And that was when my bear let me know what I’d really come out here to do, announcing it with another release of estrus.

“No! No! No!” I whispered, panic blooming as another strange urge overtook me.

Not to turn around and rush back to the den. Back to Cody and Ash.

But to?—

Thank god it was the crack of dawn during the second day of denning season, or there might have been someone around to see me open my coat like a total perv, dip my hand between my legs, and smear it on the nearest tree.

All the while calling out, “Mak! Mak! Are you here? Makari!”

What. Was. I. Doing?

It was like being hijacked by a body-snatching alien. An incredibly horny, estrus-fueled alien.

The only thing worse than smearing my essence all over some tree was then proceeding to do it again. And again. Each time, yelling out the name of the bear who had left the den to get away from me.

Cody had assured me Mak had gone out of his way to put kilometers between us. But my newly awakened bear was certain he was nearby. This was her primal way of attracting a mate. A particular mate. Mak, to be exact.

Please stop! Please stop! I silently begged her, even as she took over my vocal cords once more to yell, “Makari!”

“Noelle? Noelle, what are you doing?”

I froze mid-smear, my hand still pressed to the bark as I turned toward the voice. The faint scent of expensive cologne hit my nose, stirring an instant surge of dread.

Not Mak.

“Bradford?” My stomach plummeted when I saw my ex standing on the road between me and my car. “What are you doing here?”