6. Gavin

6

GAVIN

" L ights out for big bear," Ora's voice sings from so far away. How is she annoying even in my dreams?

"Careful, he might bite if you get too close." Another annoying voice.

Can't a guy just take a nap in peace?

Not sure how long we've been stopped when I finally open my eyes.

Or how long those two utter annoyances have been staring at me. They're like two sides of the same irritating coin.

"Will both of you shut the fuck up? I'm awake," I growl, my voice dry, cracked. Need water.

"Whoa. Grumpy bear." Ora makes a face.

She tosses me a canteen as she hops to her feet, the top of the van a few inches above her head. Wonder what it's like to be so short?

"Looks half dead, too. Maybe I should put it out of its misery." Alaya grimaces, crinkling her nose at me.

"Quit staring. You look like a pile of dead junkie ass yourself," I grumble.

"You liiike?" Alaya snickers, hoping out of the van and wiggling her butt. Always taunting, that one.

"I do. Maybe once you clean up, shower." Ora smacks her butt, pulling her hand away and sniffing her palm. She makes a gagging face. "Good lord! Did you roll around in a dumpster?"

Alaya licks her bloody, cracked lips. "Yeah. I had to get the ‘authentique' aroma of low-life-scum."

"Is that by Kelvin Clein? I'd be happy to help you wash it off…"

"Ora Clive, are you propositioning me?"

"Only all the time." Ora chuckles, shoving the other woman away as Alaya tries to hug her. "Stop it! You smell like cheese!"

Their voices fade, and I'm left to drag my sorry ass up and out of the back of the van myself. Better than their help, probably.

I barely remember taking the first corner after we hauled ass out of there.

Knowing I was safe with all of those allies around…

Total coma.

Still, my body is fucking pissed. So is my sense of paranoia.

Letting my guard down is going to take days.

Sitting on the bumper, I let my head clear before looking up or standing.

When I do, they're all waiting for me, Ora with her beaming smile, Alaya with a smug grimace.

Classic.

It's annoying how much I missed them. How good it is to see them.

"I could sit here and tan your ass all day for going rogue for two weeks, you know?" Ora crosses her arms, giving me time to get up.

"You could."

I take my time. Looks like we have a little bit of a hike ahead of us. The lot holds a few dozen cars, but it's completely surrounded by trees.

"But then I wouldn't have anything to do later. And I'd rather get back home in time for dinner."

"What are you waiting for, then?" I snip, wincing as I try to grin.

"Jackass."

"Harpy."

"What about me?" Alaya quips.

"You get a pass for saving my ass."

"That's zero fun. All the work, none of the reward?"

"Fine. You're a ten-foot pole of a pain in my ass."

"Oh, my, didn't know you were into pegging, Gav." She darts out of my range as I take a swipe at her.

"There's an old saying about square pegs and round holes," I grumble. "Not the right fit."

"Square is right. Not even willing to give it the old college try?"

My legs are screaming by the time we reach the top of the hill.

"You two are really stretching the innuendos, here."

"That's the spirit!" Ora giggles, and I almost palm my face.

Walked right into that one.

"See, you gotta lean into the puns," Alaya continues, clearing branches out of our way.

"And don't forget to clean between your buns!" Ora snaps.

"Wow. You two should take this act on the road. Far, far from here. And me."

"You really think we got something?" Alaya winks.

"You'd make money hand over fist," I tease.

"Hands, fists, I like where this is going…"

"I mean they'd pay to shut you up."

"Boooo!" Both women shoulder past me, shaking the pine branches and raining needles down on me.

This must be what Tell feels like all the time, telling bad jokes.

I'm still spitting out greenery when I break through the trees, stopping at the top of a trail leading down into a valley. The air is so fresh. Cool.

And the view is spectacular.

"Welcome to Camp Clive!" Ora spreads her arms wide, waving over the spread of cabins down below. It's an old ranch or retreat, with several newer structures popping up along the borders.

Alaya pouts. "I thought we settled on Fort Foxglove."

"You just made that up! And it's not any better than your other idea."

"Vag Valley had a nice ring to it. Two girls. One valley."

"I'm just astounded they let you two be in charge," I mumble.

"What was that, asshat?"

"Nothing."

"Welcome home, big guy. Well, at least our home for now."

"I will say… this is impressive."

Heading down into the community, I'm finally able to catch my breath. We're definitely at a little higher altitude, farther inland from Sanctum.

Based on the density of the wilderness, I'd guess the drive took at least three hours.

Or that's what my burning lack of sleep is telling me. Not. Enough.

Shrugging it off, I let Ora and Alaya show me around.

The cabins are old, but refurbished.

Green panel roofs. The campus is well organized, with a central square, a well, a community center. The new buildings are much simpler. Plywood. Metal siding.

Probably anything they can get their hands on in town on supply runs.

What's most staggering is the scope. From my limited vantage, I can tell there is so much more. And the number of bodies in the general vicinity means…

"This is…" I start, shaking my head.

"Intense? Overwhelming?"

"Yeah. I was going to say thorough. How long have you been planning this?"

"Granddaddy bought up this land years ago. Been turning it into a backup compound for months."

"It's a veritable city."

"About a third of one, actually," Alaya interjects, stripping the prosthetics off and shaking out her hair. In moments, she looks like herself, long, messy blonde hair falling over tanned muscles.

It hits me harder than I expect.

The fact that they have been saving people.

Citizens.

While I was hunting for one person, trying to avoid my own guilt.

Not that Evan wasn't worth looking for. But the reality of what the Block pulled off here floors me.

I should have been with them.

I should have hunted down Marco and killed the motherfucker, ended all of this.

But I didn't want to face Hellena without knowing.

"Where's Hellena? Tell?"

Both women turn slowly, Alaya looking a little confused.

Ora swallows once, realization dawning all over her face.

"Gav… I thought you knew. Or would have figured out…"

"What happened?" The worst possibilities flicker through my stress-addled mind.

"She's alive, if not exactly well."

A wash of dread fills my chest. "She's not with you? Where's Tell? He was supposed to?—"

"Tell barely made it out alive. And then he went and pulled a card from your playbook and took off after her like a fucking?—"

"Where is Hell, Ora?!" I stop her, gripping her shoulders and making her look at me.

"She's with Marco. He hit them the night of the flood. Tell sent me one message before he dropped off the map saying he was going to follow, but that he was in bad shape. He couldn't get to this side of town, anyway."

"What the fuck…" I stagger back, trying to process what to ask first, how to contextualize it all.

"He also checked in this morning.'

"You suck at debriefing." Alaya huffs, grabbing my arm to steady me. "Tell is on his way here. He said he has news, and we don't need to worry about her, at least for now."

"Which makes me worry that we do have to worry about Marco, soon."

"We don't know that. There's been no sign of him in weeks."

"Other than his scouts still patrolling the wreckage…"

"Well, yeah. That."

"I–I need to sit down."

"You need a meal and a bed. I don't think we can carry you if you pass out."

"Not to mention the smell…"

"Check your upper lip," I growl, heading off in no particular direction.

"Your bunk's that way!"

My middle finger is all the reply I give, turning back the opposite direction.

"So that's not even a fraction of the grounds. We have facilities and stockpiles of food. We're even working on growing plants, farming and all that good stuff to last us for a few seasons if need be."

"We're going to need it with the way town looks."

"It's not as bad in some spots. A good fourth of the town is still relatively intact."

"For now."

"Until the wild gangs of junkies need more food and want their shelter."

"Speaking of which, we finally got a name for that shit they're on."

"Devo. Sounds like a designer drug."

"Looks like a fucking nightmare incarnate."

"Great. Just what we needed. Make a note that anybody caught bringing that poison into the camp gets locked up and throat-chopped."

"Noted, Boss Lady."

They keep chattering on as I shovel food into my mouth. Exhaustion and too many days without anything good to eat make the bland, bulk-prepared food taste pretty amazing, but the action and energy required to eat it make it a chore.

It's all rote military maintenance. Input fuel.

Then sleep.

But there's still questions. There's still my racing brain that won't shut off.

Like the populace of Camp Clive.

Families. Kids everywhere.

People who only a few weeks ago wouldn't be caught dead associating with an MC, biker gang like the Block. I suppose saving their asses bought a little bit of goodwill.

Or no other options.

A positive, optimistic person would see it as a bonding experience, a future in Sanctum of unity instead of secretive, divisive sects.

Sadly, it's more likely that when this is over, if it ever is, these folks will forget who helped them.

They'll return to their boring, mindless jobs and purposely forget.

"Do we have any idea how many died?"

The question stops every conversation around dead.

Alaya and Ora circle in closer, waving for others around us to go on about their business.

"Sorry. That's not a very thoughtful question."

"No, but it's one more reason we're glad to have you back," Ora says softly, sighing. "Ballpark right now is fifty, maybe as many as a hundred. Every day, new calls make it in, new people make it out, and we find more survivors."

"Communication has been spotty, makes it hard for people to check in."

"I noticed the old main office of this campground has an antenna. Receiver. It work?"

"We've been trying to get it to work. Gofer and Tomlin have been trying to work on it, but I was kinda hoping you and Tell might have better luck. More your wheelhouse."

"Those two can fix any bike or car, but pre-wireless electronics are apparently another bucket of chicken altogether," Alaya grumbles, her accent peeking through more than usual.

"Time in the country bringing back old habits?" I smirk.

"Piss off!" She laughs, picking her fingernails with a twelve-inch blade. Despite the smile, the casual pastime, she's different. Quieter. Morose.

Asking the tough question helps me get up the courage to ask an even tougher one.

"Tell me. About Hellena, Tell. Vice. Everything. Have you found any sign of…" I swallow. "Evan?"

Ora shrinks in on herself a little, her tiny shoulders slouching. "No. Not a trace. And I promise we have looked. For any sign. But until just a few days ago, we couldn't get to the far side of town at all to check his place, his old office."

"We'll keep looking. We have to."

"I'm doing the best I can with what we have. Things are spread so thin."

"I wasn't trying to say you weren't. I'm just…"

"A fucking mess without your woman?" Alaya smirks. "You always were a sap."

I scowl but don't have the energy to bicker.

"Yeah, well. Consider all of us a fucking mess, then," Ora pats my shoulder. "So, I was kinda hoping with you back, that you might have a good idea of what you think we should do next?"

I can't tell if she's pandering to distract me or if they really need my input. Either way, I appreciate the midget's efforts.

"Intel. The best thing for our survival is to find out when that shithead Vice is coming back. Then we need to figure out where this Devo junk is coming from and vaccinate the problem."

"With bullets?'

"Absolutely. Someone is behind making it and distributing it, and I don't think it was Sly."

"That masked nutcase," Alaya clarifies.

"Damn. I was hoping with him gone, it would fix our zombie problem." Ora pouts.

"Don't even start with that post-apocalyptic shit," I groan, shaking my head.

Before we make any headway, I hear a bit of commotion by the door of the rec center, drawing attention from several tables. I'm on my feet in a flash, apprehension curling in my gut.

I really need to go to bed.

Even the guitar and drums playing in the corner have me on edge.

But as we shuffle toward the gathering at the door, I see him, and my nerve wavers.

"Whoa! Let him through, Jax, he's one of ours!" Ora shouts, clearing a path. The girl has no idea how much of a natural leader she is, how people defer to her.

Sign of a good captain.

The crowd parts, leaving Tell standing in the doorway.

"Just when I thought you couldn't get any skinnier…" Ora starts.

"Did you shrink a few inches while I was gone?" Tell snips back.

"Nah, you're just…"

The two of us stare at each other for a few seconds before he tackles me in a bear hug, clapping me on the back a few times.

"Fuck, man. It's good to see you. Even if you look like you got hit by a freight train."

"I was gonna ask if you got put through a meat grinder."

"Just two or three times."

"Sounds like a good time."

"Zero out of ten, do not recommend."

We get Tell some food, and before long, the two of us are out on the deck, leaning over the rail sharing a couple of beers. The camaraderie is reassuring.

And the familiarity of Tell, of someone else who loves Hellena the way I do, finally lets me relax, just a fraction.

"She's so fucking stubborn," Tell mutters after filling me in on their reunion.

"Damn right. And you're alive because of it."

"Doesn't make it feel any better. Worse, actually."

"Yeah. I can relate. Tell… I lost him." It's been brewing in the back of my mind since returning, since hearing that Tell would be back soon.

That I'd have to tell someone, that I needed to tell someone what happened.

Specifically, one of us. The three men in Hellena's life.

Over the past few weeks, months, we've become like… like a family.

Or we were starting to, anyway.

Tell doesn't look at me, just nods. Then he waits, lets me work it out.

"We ran out of time. Got one bomb disarmed, tried to get another far enough away…" It blurs in my memory, the order of events. But what doesn't is the rushing water.

The cold.

Feeling his hand slipping out of mine.

"It was like the fucking ocean let loose, right down on top of us," I whisper, gripping my bottle. "Unrelenting. All I could do was find anything to hold onto. To grab Evan's hand. But we were both beat to shit."

"Gav—"

I press on.

"The fucking asshole knew I couldn't hang on much longer. Not with both of our weight."

Silence hangs over us as the last bits of sunlight fade behind the rim of the valley.

"I bet he said some martyr, hero bullshit about staying alive, getting back to Hellena, that she needed you more than him?" Tell chuckles softly, bitterly.

"You know it. That sanctimonious prick." I sniff, blinking away the burn in my eyes.

"So damned dramatic."

"I should've?—"

"No. Don't fucking do that to yourself."

"I failed him. I failed Hellena. I couldn't find him, Tell. After, I?—"

"Did everything you could, just like I did. Followed Hella. And she turned me away. If you failed, then so did I. But it's not over, man. She's still alive. Which means there's still a chance."

"Ugh. How do you stay so damned positive?"

"Spite, mostly." Tell's smile fades slightly, his mood sobering.

"There's more bad news, isn't there?"

"Yeah. I went to Severance before I came here. To check on Rachelle."

It hadn't even occurred to me these past few weeks to think about Hellena's aunt.

"And?'

"She's gone. Hospital says she woke up. Checked herself out. Vanished."