Chapter 33

Idecided to stay in bed with Elijah.

Partly because his grip was much too tight for me to get away from without waking him up, and partly because I didn’t know how many more quiet moments we’d have like this after today.

From behind me, he let out a deep breath and I smiled. It was a tale-tell sign that he was finally waking up and we’d be able to get on our way soon.

“Finally,” I teased him in a quiet tone as I tapped his arm.

Elijah chuckled as he rolled a shoulder, then began to rub my stomach.

“Sorry, Mais.”

I ran the tips of my fingers lightly over his hand and shook my head. There was nothing wrong with him finally getting rest, and I didn’t want him to think that it was an issue.

No matter how frantic it made me to have even more time to make up.

“Hey, how are you feeling?” he asked in a groggy tone.

“I’m fine.”

“I don’t mean you,” he corrected with a chuckle. I inhaled a nervous breath when he began to move his hand from my stomach down the waistband of my shorts, then gently slipped inside. He used his finger tips to gently pry open my lower lips, before resting them inside.

Elijah shifted slightly behind me as he began to gently feel for any cuts that hadn’t yet healed, then sighed when I flinched.

“Fuck,” he muttered as he removed his hand carefully, then sat up.

“I told you—I’m fine,” I insisted as I turned to face him.

“Take your shorts off Mais, your panties too. I just want to get a better look and see what’s going on.”

I sat up and eased the pieces of clothing off that he requested, then folded them, and placed them neatly in a small pile next to me.

Opening my legs, I pressed my heels into the mattress, then laid on my back and rested an arm across my forehead.

I would never get used to him examining me like this, even though I knew it was for no other reason than to see how the healing was coming along.

Elijah cleared his throat as he moved off the bed, then hobbled around so that he was standing in front of me.

“Scoot down for me, Mais,” he instructed as he gently grabbed my ankles and gave me a gentle pull.

I grunted as I did as I was asked, then waited. He placed his fingers gently on my lower lips, prying them apart to inspect my cuts better.

“Actually, they don’t look too bad today. I’m gonna grab that tube and a warm washcloth. Hang out for a sec,” he said as he pulled on his prosthesis, stood up, and gave one of my legs a reassuring squeeze before he walked out of the room.

As I laid there waiting for him to return, I thought about how different life had become since he came back into my life.

It took some time for my night terrors to stop. It took even more time for his silent tears to stop falling each night he held me close—whether it be in a borrowed bed or in a dark, dirty alleyway.

But when the fear left both of us, we finally began to thrive.

I smiled more, while his tone lost its bitter resentment.

It made me feel selfish in a way.

To know that he cared for me so deeply and nothing would change the fact that I needed the damned hug.

I wanted desperately for Elijah to have a shot at a normal life. One where he wouldn’t have to worry about his Aunt Mais struggling with the concept of living yet another day. One where he would find someone who would love him as unconditionally as I did and provide things for him that I never would be able to.

“Hey, so I grabbed three tubes because I couldn’t remember which one it was,” he announced quietly as he reentered the bedroom.

I sat up with a small smile and extended a hand. And someone who would have time to teach him a skill as basic as reading.

“It’s this one,” I stated as I handed him back the ointment tube and placed the others on top of my small pile.

He gave me a sheepish grin as he unscrewed the cap. “I’ll get it eventually.”

After giving Elijah a reassuring smile in return, I laid back down and rested my arm across my forehead again.

He used the washcloth first, gently cleaning away the semi-dry ointment from before, then blew against the battered skin, causing a shiver to go through me.

He chuckled at the effect that it had on me, and I felt my cheeks turn crimson.

It wasn’t my fault that my body reacted the way it did, and I’m fairly certain his laughter wasn’t meant in jest or as cruel.

“Let me know if any of this hurts, okay?”

“Yeah.”

His fingertip was slick with the ointment as he began to dutifully cover as many of the small cuts as he could. It amazed me that I hadn’t managed to hurt myself even more in my desperate act of love.

The one I used to keep him close because I thought he would leave me if I never gave him the one thing any man wants from the woman that they love.

“I’m not gonna put too much because I think that might make things worse, but the small ones are closing up nicely,” he relayed as he reached for the top of the tube and secured it.

I pushed myself up onto my elbows and spread my legs a little further apart, stupidly thinking I’d be able to see inside of myself for some reason.

Elijah got to his feet and arched an eyebrow. A look of understanding dawned on him a few moments later and he nodded as he grabbed the washcloth and began to clean his hands with it.

“One sec.”

That’s two secs so far, I thought as I swallowed down a sigh. I wonder if there will be a third.

“Okay,” he said a moment later when he returned. “Lie back and open your legs a little wider for me, Mais.”

I grunted but did as I was told.

I hated this.

I would never form the words to Elijah, but he shouldn’t have been taking care of me as much as he was. Not when it was supposed to be my job to take care of him.

I heard the faint sound of a click, then pursed my lips when I saw a small light quickly illuminate the ceiling above us.

Again, I felt Elijah’s fingertips as he gently pried my lips open, then carefully slid a finger into me.

“Does that hurt?” he inquired as he crooked it slowly and moved it around.

I ground what was left of my own teeth together, then did my best not to inhale a sharp breath.

“Not really,” I lied.

Elijah let out a sigh as he slid his finger out then, stood up and looked down at me. “We have to get that looked at, Mais.”

“It’ll heal.”

“And if it doesn’t?” he asked softly.

“Then it doesn’t,” I snapped. “It’s not like we have the time or money to go to a hospital.”

“But you found money!” he replied stubbornly as his tone started to rise.

“Not enough for this,” I barked as I sat up, then reached for my pile of clothes. Before Elijah could say anything else, I pulled on my panties, then my shorts, and got to my feet. “I’ll be okay,” I assured him in a softer tone. “But thank you for checking.”

He turned his face away like an angry child, his lower lip trembling dangerously as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“I promise,” I said, putting a hand to the side of his face. “Everything will work out in the end.”