TWENTY-SEVEN GRAYSON

T WENTY -S EVEN

G RAYSON

As much as Grayson wanted to leave, he couldn't. Nadia had invited him and Pearce to stay for dinner and sent Reuben out to get all the fixings for a night of grilling. Pearce had done Grayson dirty and volunteered to go with Reuben, leaving him alone with Nadia and the girls. It wasn't Nadia who bothered him; it was Gemma and Lynnea. They were the reason he'd felt empty, and now that he was in their presence, the ache had subsided.

They carried glasses of lemonade onto the back deck and sat at the table. Nadia put the umbrella up and relaxed, while Grayson watched the girls play in the yard.

"So, what have you been up to?" Nadia asked.

Grayson took a sip and then played with the glass a bit while he formulated an answer. "I graduated from American with a degree in graphic design. I wanted to be an architect but couldn't hack the math, which is stupid, since computers do it all for you these days. Anyway, not much math in graphic design, so I went that route and graduated. For the past few years, I've been at the Wold Collective, where I design ridiculously high-end, overpriced boardroom tables."

"Like the tables with the different color inlays?"

Grayson nodded. "Different shine, inlay, wood. You name it, I design it."

"That's incredibly—"

"Boring? Mundane?"

"Safe," she said. "I work in a middle school with hellions. Granted, not all of them are bad, but a handful of them give me a run for my money."

"Did you get your degree in history?"

She smiled and nodded. "I did. I intended to go back to Arlington, but then I met Rafe and things changed."

"I'm sorry" was all Grayson could say.

Nadia forced a smile. "I'm just happy I still have them." She motioned toward the girls. "I can't imagine losing the three of them. I guess if I had, I probably wouldn't be here talking to you right now."

He wanted to tell her not to talk like that, but he had no right. She was entitled to feel the way she had and continue to do so, without reservation.

"Tell me about him," he prompted. "Since he's the reason you never came back."

Nadia laughed. "I came home," she told him. "I just didn't drive down your street or anything." She looked down at her lap. "No offense, but it was love at first sight when I saw him."

"None taken. We did the right thing by breaking up before college. Neither of us were mature enough to handle a long-distance relationship."

Her mouth dropped open. "Hey!"

Grayson held his hands up. "I only speak the truth."

Nadia laughed. "You're right, but still. Anyway, he was amazing, kind, and thoughtful. The type of guy who holds the door and pulls your chair out. He was the kind of man where people say he died too young because when it came to Rafe, that's true. He worked hard, but he never brought work home. Once he came through the door, the only people who existed for him were his family. Work could wait until the morning, was what he always said. The weekends were ours. We'd sleep in, snuggle with the girls, and then make breakfast as a family. Our lives revolved around us. I know, without a doubt, he loved me. And he worshipped those girls." Nadia pointed toward the yard. "It wasn't just us who lost him that day—everyone who knew him lost a son, brother, uncle, friend, coworker, neighbor. When it snowed, he'd shovel the roofs of our older neighbors' homes, so they wouldn't get conned out of their money, and he'd mow their lawns when they went on vacation. Weeks before he died, he was going to run an after-school program for boys who don't have a dad at home, teaching them manners, how to tie a tie, and how to shake hands. That sort of thing. Rafe was this all-around great man who didn't deserve this."

Grayson's chest tightened. If Rafe hadn't died, someone else would have. It was just divine decree that he happened to get Rafe's heart. At least that's what he told himself while he sat there with Nadia, pretending. He was certain he had his answer. His new heart missed the two girls it loved dearly. Even as he sat there and watched them play, he longed to be near them, to be in the yard, basking in their presence. Grayson's mind told his heart, This is it—a onetime visit . But even his mind knew otherwise.

"Aside from making ridiculously high-end overpriced boardroom tables, what else do you do?"

Nothing compared to your husband. Grayson had never felt like less of a man until now. If Rafe didn't deserve to die, then Grayson didn't deserve his heart.

"Honestly, my life is pretty mundane," he told her. "I'm engaged. She's not the mundane part, though." Grayson pulled his cell phone out and brought up a picture of Reid.

"She's beautiful. What's her name?"

"Reid. We're getting married next spring at the National Mall."

"Under the cherry blossoms?"

He nodded.

"That'll be so beautiful. You're very lucky."

Laughing, he pocketed his phone. "You have no idea. I almost blew it with her. Somewhere in my life, I decided being her friend was easier than admitting my feelings for her. I'm glad I woke up before it was too late." His statement held an unbelievable amount of truth despite missing one key component. Grayson thought about asking Nadia outright if Rafe's organs had been donated, but he already knew. There was no way two little girls could make him feel like everything was right in the world when he knew nothing about them.

Grayson was thankful when Reuben and Pearce returned. While they manned the grill and Nadia made side dishes, Grayson went down the steps and into the backyard with the girls, who were having a tea party.

"Hi," he said as he sat down, feeling instantly at ease.

"Hi," Gemma said quietly, while Lynnea said nothing.

"What are you doing?"

"Tea party with our dollies."

He picked one up, held it, and put it back down after it winked at him. Dolls were freaky, always watching.

"Do you know our daddy?" Gemma asked.

I feel him. "No, unfortunately I never had the opportunity to meet him. I'm sorry he's not here."

"The person killed him with their car," Lynnea said quietly. Grayson didn't know how to respond.

"Lynnea, don't say that. Mommy will get mad, and she will cry."

Lynnea's expression turned sad. Grayson tugged on the ends of her hair. "Hey, don't be sad."

"I'm mad," she said as she crossed her arms over her chest. "At her!" She glared at her sister.

"She's trying to protect your mom," Grayson pointed out. "You don't want her to be sad, right?"

"She laughed today," Gemma said. "At whatever you said to her up there."

"Oh yeah?"

"'Cause you funny," Lynnea told him.

How could children go from talking about their father being killed, to laughing? Lynnea was right. There wasn't any way to sugarcoat it. Their words went right to his heart, which began thumping wildly, thumping in his ears. He placed his hand over it to quell the noise. Looking at the girls, he waited for them to make eye contact, to ask him why his heartbeat was so loud. They never did. Couldn't they hear it?

Will they want to hear it?

He could do that for them. The pamphlet was at home, describing the heartbeat teddy bears that stored twenty to thirty seconds' worth of sound. They were meant to help families of those who had lost loved ones and had made the ultimate sacrifice by donating their organs.

Gemma set a cup and saucer down in front of Grayson. "Do you like cream in your tea?"

"I—I don't know," he said. "I've never had tea or been to a tea party."

Lynnea stood, ran to a box, and then returned with a hat and feather boa, which she draped dramatically around his shoulders. The hat didn't fit, so she set it on top of his hair.

"You have a big head," she said as she giggled. "Big brains." She shook her head while laughing until she rolled over.

"My dad calls her a hurricane," Gemma told him while she continued to prepare their imaginary tea. "I'll put cream in your tea. That's how my grandma likes it."

"Grandma Lorraine?"

Gemma looked at him sharply. "How do you know her name?"

"Like your mom said, we went to high school together. I know your grandparents and your aunt Sienna as well."

"Do you know my cousins?"

Grayson shook his head slightly. "No, I don't think so. What are their names?"

In a shocking move, Lynnea sat on his lap. He acted as coolly as possible. "Lincoln and Jaxon. They live in Arlington."

"So does my mom," Grayson told Gemma. "Maybe when you come visit your grandparents next time, we'll go to the zoo. We can visit the elephants."

"I like the pandas," Gemma said.

"They're funny," Lynnea told him. "We watch them on the video when it snows. He's always rolling in the snow. He's going to be a snowman."

Grayson couldn't agree more and didn't want to tell them the pandas were no longer at the zoo.

Gemma held up her teacup and stared at him, as if she expected him to do the same. He reached for Lynnea's and handed it to her before picking his up. They clanked their plastic cups together and then sipped. Grayson was out of his element, but he figured he'd watched enough television during his recovery that he could easily play along.

He hissed and fanned his mouth. "Oh, that's hot, but delicious. You must tell me the flavor so I can make it at home."

Gemma and Lynnea roared with laughter. "Our daddy used to do the same thing," Gemma said. "You acted just like him."

"Did I now?"

Tears welled in the back of his eyes. He pinched the outside of his leg to ward them off. He refused to cry in front of them, Nadia, or anyone for that matter.

"Do you have kids?" Lynnea asked.

"Not yet," he told her. "Someday, I hope."

"Do you have a wife?" Gemma asked.

"Almost. We are getting married next year. Do you want to see a picture of her?"

The girls nodded, and he fished his phone out of his pocket and brought his photos up.

"She's pretty," Gemma said.

While Lynnea pointed out the obvious: "She has Mommy's hair."

"What's her name?" Gemma asked.

"Reid."

"That's a nice name," Gemma said.

Nadia called for them. She stood on the deck and waited. Grayson helped the girls clean up and didn't bother to remove his feathered boa. He thought if he did, he might insult Lynnea. Inside, they washed up, and Grayson helped the girls set the table outside. It was a nice night, and as the sun set, strings of white lights came to life overhead.

Grayson wanted this. He wanted the suburban lifestyle. The house with the picket fence, inviting backyard, and friendly neighbors: everything Reid had talked about before she'd given him the chance he begged for. Where they lived now, they said hi to the people they ran into, but they had no idea who they were or what kind of lives they lived. He hadn't cared until now. Learning about Rafe and the man he was made Grayson want to be a better person.

When he sat down, he chose to sit between the girls. He felt at home there, nestled in their warmth and embrace. He didn't care that they picked food off his plate. He accepted the hot dog Lynnea didn't want when she pretended it was an airplane headed toward his mouth. When Pearce brought up his boa, instead of being embarrassed, he asked his friend if he was jealous that he didn't have one. Gemma fixed that for him. After a quick run to her bedroom, she draped a purple one around his shoulders and placed a very elegant tiara on top of his head.

Grayson's eyebrow popped as he waited for Pearce to say something. He didn't. He bowed his head and continued eating.

It had taken less than an hour, and the girls had Grayson wrapped around their fingers. They owned his heart. The ache was gone, filled now with the love and laughter of two little girls who had lost their father way too soon.

He didn't want to leave.