Chapter 7

When I wake up, I will be a different person.

In a city a thousand miles from where I grew up and two thousand miles from where I am headed, I stand in front of a mirror looking at my face for the last time.

In a few minutes, a plastic surgeon will begin the long and painful process of turning me into Alice Worth, an unremarkable earth and air mage who is about to move to the West Coast to start a new life. My face will be completely different. This me, the one in the mirror, will be gone forever. I am trying to figure out how I feel. I should be scared, I suppose. Maybe relieved or angry. Instead, I just feel numb.

After the night I left the cabal compound, it took me nearly a week to get here and another week before I found a plastic surgeon who could be trusted to do the work I needed. The surgeon is a mage whose family was killed by a cabal. He knows who I am and he wants to help.

There is a picture taped to the mirror of the real Alice Worth. I run my fingertips over my face, feeling my forehead, my eyes, my nose, my lips, my chin, and try to imagine looking into the glass and seeing that other woman looking back at me. Somehow, I already feel like this isn't my face anymore, like it's been on too long already. I'm impatient to have it be gone so I can start recovering. It will be at least another week before I am able to resume my run across the country to my final destination.

Although I have heard nothing to make me think I am being pursued, and the news is filled with images of my grandfather openly grieving over my death, I can't help but feel like danger is nipping at my heels. I want to be moving on, but this stop is necessary. I can go no farther wearing this face.

There is a quiet knock on the door. It's the surgeon, asking if I am ready.

I've been ready for this moment for as long as I can remember.

As I lie back on the table, the surgeon asks again if I am sure I want to do this. With no hesitation, I tell him yes. I look at the world as Moses Murphy's granddaughter one last time, and then an ocean of soft darkness sweeps me away.

I woke to the unfamiliar sensation of a very large, very warm body pressed up against my backside and an arm curled around my middle. Sean was nuzzling my neck. He'd opened the curtains a bit to let some afternoon sunlight into the room. I blinked fuzzily at the clock on the nightstand to see it was a little after one. I'd had about six hours of sleep and felt pretty good. I yawned and started to stretch.

Agony flared in my stomach, and I gasped and curled into a ball. Either my sore abdominal muscles had tightened up and they were simply cramping, or it was actual injuries from the landmine I'd triggered. The pain made me breathe in short, panting breaths.

"Alice, what's wrong?" Sean was wide awake in an instant. "You're hurt."

I gritted my teeth and managed not to whimper.

He looked at my stomach, but there was nothing to see. The injury, whatever it was, was on the inside. I focused on breathing through the pain, and it started to recede.

"The wards…from yesterday," I finally managed to say. "It's just a muscle cramp. I'm okay."

Sean made a snarly noise. "You keep saying you're fine and you're okay, but it's pretty clear you're not." He sounded angry. "I can smell blood. You may be bleeding internally."

I froze and looked at him—like, really, really looked at him.

In the daylight, I could see a faint gold sheen over his eyes that reflected the light in a way no human eye did. Add that to his muscular physique, body temperature, tendency to rub his face against me, and ability to smell an internal injury, and….

"Werewolf?" I guessed.

Sean went perfectly still. We stared at each other.

A number of emotions were visible on his face: worry, anger, and…fear? What was he afraid of, that I'd turn on him? I supposed it was a legitimate concern for a werewolf these days, when we were all afraid of each other and the Agency.

I sighed and gingerly rubbed my abdomen where the pain had faded to soreness, like I'd done too many sit-ups. I wasn't worried that Sean was a werewolf. If it were nearer the full moon, I might have been concerned, but as it was, I doubted he'd be going furry on me. Since a bite from a werewolf in wolf form was the only way to contract the virus, I was more bothered by the pain in my stomach and the possibility of internal injuries.

Sean cleared his throat. "Should I leave?"

Carefully, so I didn't strain my stomach muscles, I turned so I could face him. His arms were still around me, but he looked grim.

I took his face in my hands and kissed him.

At first, he didn't respond; I think I surprised him. Then he kissed me back with a hunger that took my breath away. When we separated, he met my gaze with dark eyes that shone gold. How I'd missed the signs last night, I had no idea. I must have been too preoccupied with the events of the day.

Sean touched my face. "So you're not angry?"

I shook my head. "I don't care that you're a werewolf. Sure, I'd have preferred it if you'd told me last night, but it wouldn't have changed anything. It's not like I can catch it from having sex with you."

That made him relax a little, but he looked concerned as he placed his hand carefully on my stomach. "What kind of wards did you walk into yesterday? What magic could hurt you like this?"

I debated what I could tell him without breaching client confidentiality. "The wards were set by a woman who died a couple of months ago. When I walked into them, they did this." I pointed to the burn on my chest. It was still red, and it hurt the way burns did: a steady, hot, stinging sensation that hadn't faded much since last night.

Sean paled. "That's right over your heart."

"Yep. The wards were designed to kill. I was lucky they had faded."

He stared at me.

I kept talking. "I needed to take down the wards for my client. The unweaving went fine, but apparently there was a landmine, and it got me." He didn't say anything. "I threw up a lot, and some of it was blood. That's probably what you're smelling. Honestly, I don't think I'm actually still bleeding internally—"

Sean lost it.

I squeaked as he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me against his body with a growl. He was careful not to hold me too tightly, though his arms felt like steel. "I want to kill the person who hurt you."

"You can't; she's dead already," I said into his chest. "I don't need a protector, Sean. I'm not looking for someone to take care of me, or fight my battles for me."

"I know, but I'm an alpha. My instinct is to protect…" He hesitated. "People who are injured."

"Females and the weak," I corrected him. "I know. I'm familiar enough with werewolves to understand that, but I'm not part of your pack, or yours to protect. I'm just your one-night stand."

Sean pulled back. "Is that what this is?" He looked startled, as if that hadn't been anything close to what he expected me to say. I wondered if he was used to women who got emotionally attached to one-night stands. He wouldn't have to worry about that with me; emotional attachments weren't really my thing.

I patted his chest affectionately. "Sean, we both had a good time, but I don't have any illusions about how this goes."

Sean's expression went flat. "How do you think ‘this' goes?"

I ran my hands over his chest, scratching him lightly with my nails, and he made that growly sound I liked. "We lie here for a while longer, since neither of us has to be anywhere immediately, then we have sex again because you're that damn good at it, and then we part company with good feelings and good memories."

Sean leaned close to me. Before I realized what he was doing, he inhaled deeply. I recoiled, taken aback by his suddenly very werewolf behavior. "What I'm smelling isn't old injuries from yesterday. I'm pretty sure you are still bleeding internally. You need medical attention, Alice."

I put my hands on my aching stomach and knew he was right. "I have healing spells," I told him with a sigh. "Give me a minute." I started to slide off the bed.

"Do you need help?"

I shook my head and stood, heading for my bathroom. "This won't take long. There's another bathroom down the hall if you need to use it." I went in and closed the door.

After I used the toilet, I dug around in a drawer and took out my first aid kit, a small wooden box with runes carved on all sides. The runes were spells that hid the energy stored within. I traced three runes on the lid, then opened it. Inside the box were crystals containing healing spells of various strengths, color-coded from light green—minor injury—to dark purple—possibly fatal wound. I took out a green crystal, held it gently against the burn on my chest, braced myself, and said, "Helios."

Magic flared and I sucked in a breath as the spell went to work on the burn. It felt like a hundred tiny needles were stabbing me. The sensation lasted for about thirty seconds before fading. When I took my hand away, the burn was gone, leaving a faint scar. I set the crystal aside to be respelled when I had time.

Whatever the landmine had done to my insides, it was going to take a stronger spell to fix it. I rooted around in the box and came up with a mid-range blue crystal. This one was going to hurt. Mindful of Sean in the next room, I turned on the shower to help mask any sounds and grabbed a hand towel. I sat down on the bath mat next to the tub, pressed the crystal against my stomach, and invoked the spell.

I stuffed the towel into my mouth to muffle my cries. Now the needles were inside me, and it felt like they were ripping through my insides as the spell went to work on the damage. This much pain from the healing spell meant there really were significant internal injuries. I'd always thought healing spells should feel good, not hurt, but no one had ever been successful at creating one that wasn't painful. I bit down on the towel and tried to be quiet.

Minutes crawled by. When the pins-and-needles sensation finally faded, I dropped the empty spell crystal on the rug and pushed myself to my feet using the side of the tub. My stomach felt tender in the way that recently healed injuries do. I put the box away in the drawer, washed my face and rinsed my mouth, and turned off the shower.

When I opened the bathroom door, Sean was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking very tense. He'd probably heard enough to know that the healing spells had hurt. He stood and looked me over. "Are you all right?"

"I am now. All healed." I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him warmly. He relaxed against me and kissed me back.

We returned to the bed, and Sean pulled me into his arms. My fingers traced over his shoulders, feeling the definition of his muscles. His hands moved up my back, caressing.

"Where did you get these scars?" he asked.

I stiffened. The scars on my back were from another lifetime. My phoenix tattoo covered most of the damage, but the lines were still visible if you looked closely. Healing spells and even plastic surgery could only do so much. The only thing that might heal them completely would be slicing the scars off and pouring vampire blood over the wounds, but I had no desire to undergo that particularly extreme measure.

"I used to know some bad people," I said.

He stilled. "How bad?"

"Very bad." I moved my head so my lips were against his neck. The smell of him eased the tension in my shoulders. I wondered absently if alphas gave off calming pheromones.

"I saw the scars while you were asleep." Sean's fingers traced the lines. "I assume healing spells were used…after?"

"Yes. A lot of them, for a long time." My voice was level.

He took a deep, involuntary breath. "And these scars remain?"

Intensive healing spells could heal most severe injuries with minimal or no scarring. Right now, he was imagining how bad the wounds had been for the spells to have been unable to heal me completely. I didn't have to imagine anything; I'd been conscious for all of it. I knew my back looked butchered when the blood mage had finished with me. For it to look as good as it did now was nothing short of miraculous.

I was suddenly cold. I wanted heat and to be distracted from the memories, and I knew one sure way to get both.

I drew his hand up to my mouth so I could lightly bite his fingers, and he made a snarly wolf sound that sparked an instant reaction. I was suddenly very aware of my breasts brushing against his chest. I reached down and stroked him gently.

Sean groaned and shifted on the bed. "Alice—"

I nipped his bottom lip and his eyes turned gold. I pushed him onto his back and moved to my hands and knees so I could lick slowly across his chest. He reached for me, but I moved away and bent over him, teasing him with my mouth and tongue and making him writhe. I found I liked having an alpha werewolf at my mercy.

He moved so quickly, all I saw was a blur. One second I was leaning forward to draw him into my mouth again, and the next I was on my back and he was on top of me, his hand between my thighs, and I was crying out. Blissful minutes later, I was gasping and screaming and trying to pull away from him, but he held me tight until I stopped shuddering.

When I opened my eyes, Sean looked at me with an expression of such fierce passion that I went still. "Condoms?"

"Nightstand. Bottom drawer," I panted.

The drawer opened, the box tore, a packet crinkled, and then Sean was back. "Up," he commanded, raising me and turning me over onto my stomach.

I resisted, self-conscious about my scars in the daylight, but then he was kissing my back and suddenly I didn't care anymore. He pulled me onto my hands and knees, his hands on my hips, and then he pushed into me from behind. I arched my back with a cry.

He moved carefully and gently. It was wonderful, but I wanted and needed something else. "Harder," I gasped. "Faster."

He bent over to run his lips across my back and I shuddered. "Are you sure?" His voice was deep and growly and it made me crazy. "Your stomach…."

"I'm healed," I told him breathlessly. "Please, Sean. Please don't go slow."

His fingers dug into my hips hard enough to leave bruises and suddenly the brakes were off. I grabbed the bedding as hard as I could as he growled—a deep, rumbling werewolf growl—that almost sent me over the edge. I forgot about everything else as the pleasure rose toward a crescendo. I called his name over and over and begged him to go even faster.

This time, I had none of the second thoughts that held me back last night. He reached around to stroke me and I came with a wail. A heartbeat later, he snarled and emptied himself inside me. We fell over onto the bed, gasping for breath.

"Oh my God," Sean rasped.

"Mmm-hmmm."

I lay on the bed while he went to the bathroom to clean up. He had, I thought appreciatively, a thoroughly magnificent butt.

When Sean came back, he climbed onto the bed and wrapped his arms around me. "I'm glad I went to Hawthorne's last night," he said, biting my earlobe gently.

I laughed. "Me too. And I'm glad Charles was too busy to see me. This turned into a really fantastic night—well, a really fantastic day."

"What brought you in to see the vampire?"

"A matter related to one of my cases." I shrugged lazily and glanced at the clock. "It's almost two. Don't you have to be at work at three?"

He groaned. "Are you kicking me out of bed?"

"We have to get up at some point. You've got to get to work, and I'm supposed to be getting a text about seeing Charles tonight. And I've got a client to see." And a ghost to check on, though I didn't mention that.

"You did get a couple of messages."

"What? Why didn't you wake me up?" I scooted away from him to grab my phone off the nightstand.

"I thought you needed your sleep."

I sat cross-legged on the bed and checked my messages. There were two. The first one was from Bryan, who'd texted me around eight a.m. Meeting with Mr. V at midnight. Car is out front, key in the mailbox. Sean Maclin's car is in your driveway.

Shit. I'd told them Sean had dropped me off. Now Bryan knew that not only had I lied, but that Sean had stayed with me. My face burned.

"What is it?" Sean watched me, frowning.

"Nothing." Damn it, I didn't answer to Bryan for anything, least of all my sex life. It was none of his business if Sean stayed with me. I supposed I shouldn't have lied, but Bryan had pushed me about whether or not Sean had dropped me off and maybe I resented him acting like it was any of his business. I wasn't really clear on my motives for lying. In any case, I would have to face Bryan tonight at Hawthorne's in order to see Charles. Fantastic.

Also, Sean's last name was Maclin. Good to know. Bryan must have had someone run the tags of the vehicle when they saw it in the driveway. Maybe he was concerned about my safety, but whatever his reason, it felt like an egregious invasion of my privacy.

I scowled and fired back a terse text: Ok will meet C at midnight.

"Alice?"

I looked up from my phone. "Bryan texted me a meeting time for Charles when he came by. He was wondering why your car was parked in my driveway. And your last name is Maclin."

Sean sat up. "And you told him I dropped you off."

"Yes."

"Is this going to cause problems?"

"Why should it? I don't owe anyone an explanation for who I sleep with."

Again Sean looked surprised. Then he grinned.

"What?" I asked.

"I don't think I've ever met anyone quite like you before, Alice."

"You're probably right."

He laughed. I smiled briefly.

The second text was from Natalie. Hi! Saw your note. Sorry I fell asleep. Call when you get a chance. She signed the message with a smiley face.

I blew out a relieved breath. It looked like she didn't remember anything about manifesting any magic.

Sean moved over to me on his hands and knees and kissed me so hard that I dropped my phone. "What was that?" I asked breathlessly.

"I have to go to work, but at the risk of being cliché, I'd really like to see you again."

"In what way?" If he was interested in working out a bang-buddy arrangement, I would be willing to consider it.

"How about tonight, after your meeting with Vaughan? I'll be off work. We can have some drinks and talk about beer and music or whatever else is on your mind."

I stared at him. "You're talking about an actual date."

Sean's mouth quirked. "Yes, an actual date. What we do after that—if anything—is up to you."

"I'm not really looking for a relationship," I told him.

"Me neither, but I think we both had a good time. I'd like to get to know you better. How about one date, and then you decide where we go from there."

The sex had been very satisfying, and it was a tempting offer, but there was something in Sean's eyes that made me wary. I'd invited him into my bed thinking we were on the same page about this being a one-night deal. Maybe we'd started out that way, but it looked like he might be on a different page now, possibly a whole other chapter, and I wasn't even sure my book had that chapter in it.

Still, I could try to let him down easy. "Let me think about it."

He gave me a wolfish smile. "Did I not pass the audition?"

I was quiet for a few moments. "I thought we were clear about the plan for how this would go."

"Plans can change."

"Not mine." Mine was simple: stay cautious, stay under the radar, stay alive.

Sean leaned forward. "Give me a chance to change your mind."

"I said I would think about it."

He got up and started pulling on his clothes. I shamelessly watched the reverse striptease and couldn't help but feel a little sad when he was dressed.

As he sat on the bed putting on his shoes, he turned to me. "Well, you know my last name, but I don't know yours."

I hesitated but saw no reason not to tell him. He had my address; he could find out easily for himself. "Worth."

"Alice Worth." He finished tying his shoes. "Can I have your number, Alice?"

I tilted my head and considered. "Why don't you give me yours? If you need to get me a message, you can call Hawthorne's, and they'll see that I get it."

"You don't give an inch." Strangely, he was grinning.

"Nope."

Sean gave me his number and I put it in my phone under Wolf. He saw the nickname and laughed.

He rose, then bent down to give me a sizzling kiss. When he drew back, his eyes were gold. It occurred to me to wonder if the wolf in him enjoyed the idea of a chase. Too bad for him that I had no intention of playing along.

He moved his lips to my ear. "Give me a call," he said softly.

"Maybe."

He went to the door of my room, then turned back. We looked at each other.

"Have a good day at work, Alice," he said finally.

"You too, Sean."

He hesitated, as if he wanted to say something else, and then he was gone.