Chapter 5

He could have gone after her, prevented her from leaving, but he let her go. He needed time to think anyway. Dragging on his pants and ignoring the underwear and the rest of his clothing, he poured himself another glass of scotch and went to stand by the window. The things she had told him were etched in his brain.

For years, he had been bitter and lost because he believed she had aborted his baby. Now, he had to rethink. He believed her. Her reaction, the tears in her beautiful eyes, the pure anguish on her exquisite face had been very real. She was not that good an actress.

He had been careful or had wanted to be. The first time he had taken her innocence, he had been careless. More like excited, beside himself. It happened suddenly. They had been going out for three months when he went to her place to keep her company.

It had been the winter break, and her parents had gone on location to some remote country and left her behind. His own parents had gone to Australia, and he had refused to go along. His friends made plans to go to a warmer climate and invited him, but he wanted to stay with her.

They had been sitting in her living room, enjoying the huge tree, the blaze of fire in the hearth, and drinking hot cocoa that she had made. The servants had been dismissed for the holiday, so they had the place to themselves.

She had put on some Christmas carols, and they had started dancing. It had been fun and laughter at first until he kissed her. As usual, the minute their lips met, the passion exploded between them. Even now, Hayes could still feel the incredible sensation of her lips against his.

"Hayes, we shouldn't," she whispered.

"I can't stop. I am sorry." They had pledged to wait until her seventeenth birthday, but the heavy necking and groping in their cars, plus in the house whenever her parents were not around, which was a lot, was getting to them. And it was getting increasingly difficult to stop from going all the way.

She had led him to the sofa in silent acceptance. He had been so excited that he had almost climaxed prematurely. The sight of her lush curves, especially her generous breasts with their rounded nipples, had sent passion and desire rushing through his body at an alarming pace.

Swallowing the drink, he eased toward the edge of the sofa, his elbows resting on his thighs, his expression bleak. He recalled wanting to worship her body with his mouth and hands, but that had not happened. He had behaved like an inept schoolboy, which he had been, of course.

For all his experiences with other girls, the expertise he thought he had acquired had disappeared, and he was all awkward thumbs. She excited him like no other.

The feel of her bare flesh, the sight of her, and the taste of her nipples had sent him into such a state of frenzy that it had him speeding things up and apologizing to her. In his acute desire for her, he had bitten into her nipple, causing her pain.

And when he finally climbed on top of her—he had entered her with too much force after promising not to hurt her. It had taken the second act for him to slow things down, but it had been difficult.

Even tonight, being with her had excited him so much that he had hardly been able to bear it. After that first night, he had reluctantly started using protection.

"You are going to have to Hayes," she had insisted. "We have plans, and an unwanted pregnancy is not part of it. We both have our careers to think about, and not to mention, the fact that our parents would kill us. Especially yours.

Your mother is going to think that I trapped you by getting pregnant. I cannot just waltz into a clinic and ask to be put on birth control, not without my mother's consent. It has to be you."

And he had stocked up on condoms, hating the feel of even the thin rubber between them. But he made up for that by using his mouth on her. His tongue could not get her pregnant, so that had been his favorite thing to do, and it had brought her so much pleasure that he had enjoyed doing it.

Tossing back the drink and realizing that the potent memories were getting him aroused, he rose and went to put the glass away. He was about to finish dressing when his phone rang.

Rushing over to the desk and thinking it was her, he grabbed it, squelching his disappointment when it turned out to be Simone.

"Hi."

"Hi, yourself. Have you forgotten something?"

Tucking the phone between his shoulder and ear, he went to retrieve his shirt. "I don't think so."

"We had dinner plans. Hayes, I have been calling for the past half hour and left you a bunch of messages. I am beginning to feel like a stalker."

"Oh, Christ! I am sorry. I had a meeting that ran over, and my phone was on vibrate. Were you waiting at the restaurant?"

"Of course I was. But I can forgive you if you come over and spend the night."

Closing his eyes, he went to sit behind his desk. She certainly did not deserve what he was going to have to do to her, but no matter what happened between him and Camelia, he could never be with her again. "I am sorry, I am completely wiped. I will make it up to you, I promise."

"Is there something wrong?"

"No. I am exhausted, and I have an early meeting in the morning. There are some hiccups with the Southern Airlines deal that have to be ironed out."

"You are working too hard. I am going to insist that we spend the entire weekend together. No work—just us, doing something fun."

"I will let you know." He realized he sounded evasive but could not help it. "Goodnight Simone."

Hanging up the phone, he sat there staring at his laptop for a minute before pushing away from the desk. She wanted time and he was going to give it to her. She was going to have to make the next move. He had his pride after all.

*****

Camelia sat on the edge of the bed in the darkened bedroom, her mind in turmoil. She had made the right decision, she told herself firmly.

All the way from his office to her place, she had been telling herself that. It was a decision she had made when his mother came to see her during her time of unbelievable distress. Hillary Marsden had always appeared to be her friend, never behaving otherwise.

If she was displeased at her son's choice of girlfriend, she had never revealed it. Hayes' dad had been jovial, kind, and always welcoming. She had been in her room trying to adjust to her new reality when the woman had been announced.

It had been three days since the awful tragedy, and things were happening at a rapid pace. Hayes had been very supportive and told her that he would always be there for her.

"Hillary. Please come in."

"I don't want to intrude, my dear."

"No." Camelia shook her head and gestured to the silk covered chair near the window. She had spent hours redecorating her room and within days, she was going to have to leave. She could not bear to think about it.

"Hayes and his dad went to the tennis court, so give me time to have some time with you. I am sorry about what happened."

Camelia nodded, thinking the woman had come over to offer her sympathy and support. "I never knew things were bad—never guessed it."

"You cannot blame yourself. I heard rumors–" She shook her head. "It doesn't matter now. What are your plans?"

"My aunt is suggesting that we get away and go to Europe until everything cools off."

"But you don't want to."

"No. Hayes and I–"

"My dear, I don't mean to sound callous and selfish, but I have to think about my family. You are barely seventeen, and so is my son. This thing–" She waved a delicate hand vaguely. "This romance between you and Hayes will pass.

Your future is uncertain as it is, but he is the heir to a fortune. Our standing in society will be rocked if you stay and continue to be with Hayes. Go to Europe, get out of the country, and try and pick up the pieces of your life."

Camelia stared at her in shock. "We love each other, and we can get through this."

"You are so young," Hillary told her with a smile and a shake of her blonde head. "So naive—this awful scandal will not only stain you, but it will stain us as well. My husband—the company is negotiating with an airline in the south of France, and the negotiations are delicate.

The slightest hint of scandal will upset things and we cannot afford that deal to fall through. If you love my son as you claim, you will do the right thing and leave without saying a word to him."

Camelia felt the rest of her world collapsing as she stared at her boyfriend's mother. Hayes had been her last hope of clinging to something good. Everything in her life was in shambles. Her so-called friends had stopped calling, and only Hayes stood by her. She was all alone in the world.

Her father had murdered her mother, and people were saying that it was because she had been having an affair. She had stopped going out in public because of the whispers and the reporters clamoring for a story.

"You want me to leave the man I love."

"I want you to leave the boy you think you love. This is a teenage crush, and you both will get over it." She rose gracefully and looked around the room. "I heard from several good sources that you are going to be losing everything. Go away from this place and try to forget what has happened here."

She had thought about telling the woman she was pregnant but decided to keep it to herself. And she had cried brokenly for a life she thought she had.

Taking a deep breath, Camelia blinked away the tears. It had been wonderful being with him, and yes, she loved him even more than ever, if that was possible. But as before, she had to make the sacrifice. Hayes Marsden was a multi-billionaire, and like men of his status, he would need an heir, and she would never be able to provide him with one.

*****

"Dearest, you missed dinner." Hillary met him as he entered the front door, a concerned frown on her forehead. "Simone called here looking for you as well."

"I was tied up," he said briefly, not really in the mood for a chat. "I am tired–"

"You had the interview with Ms. DeWinter."

Hayes turned to look at her, an amused look on his face. "Ms. DeWinter? Mother, you knew Camelia since she was a child, why the formality now?"

"She almost ruined your life–"

"You don't know anything." Walking into the library, he shrugged off his jacket and draped it over the chair. The ruined shirt had been dumped, and he was wearing a fresh one. "She was pregnant, did you know that?" He watched as the shock flickered over her face.

Settling into a chair in front of the desk, Hillary stared at her son. "You did not say anything. You never said a word."

"Because we were keeping it to ourselves. It was an accident, and we had no idea what to do. She had just discovered her condition when the awful thing happened to her parents. It ended up putting the pregnancy on the back burner."

"What happened?"

"She left abruptly without saying a word to me." Leaning back in the chair, he closed his eyes wearily. "I was devastated, and I thought she had gone away to get rid of my baby."

"And she didn't?"

"No. I accused her tonight of doing just that, and she was stricken and outraged. She miscarried and almost lost her life in the process. After what she went through with her parents' tragedy, she lost our baby."

"Do you believe her?"

"Yes, mother, I do."

"Dearest, it does not change anything. You cannot mean to take things back up with her."

"I love her," he smiled grimly. "Nothing is ever going to change that. She is my life, the beginning and ending of it. But she wants nothing to do with me. She claims she cannot be in a relationship, not even with me."

"You should listen to her," Hillary began earnestly. "Her scandal, what happened to her, will come back up. You are the CEO of a multi-billion-dollar company and as soon as it is known you are with her, it will start all over again."

"Do you think I give a damn about that? I wanted to be there for her. She was alone and in pain. She almost died and was told that it might be impossible for her to conceive."

Hillary rubbed her palms on the seams of her dress pants as she contemplated what was the appropriate thing to say.

"You might as well speak, Mother," her son said dryly. "It's written all over your face."

"I am looking out for you. And she is thinking about you, which is very good. You are going to need an heir."

"I am the reason she might not be able to have a child," he pointed out.

"You cannot blame yourself. The awful tragedy did that to her, and I am sorry to say this, but it might have been a blessing. I–" her voice trailed off at the furious look on his face.

"I am sorry–"

"Are you?" he asked menacingly. "You went to see her that day, a few days before the funeral. I recalled you saying that you were going over to bring her some flowers and a few kind words.

What did you say to her? And now that I think of it, she was withdrawn; she was different. When I asked her what it was, she made some excuses about having to leave her home. I knew instinctively that it was not that, but I did not want to press. She left right after the funeral without saying a word. What did you say to her Mother?"

"Only the truth." Her eyes were defiant, her shoulders squared. "I advised her to leave and take some time to think things through. I told her that if she loved you like she said she did, she would not want to burden you with her problems. I–" She drew in a breath as he slowly rose. "I am your mother–"

"You said all of that to her?" Hayes was so angry that he had to fight to control his reaction.

"A girl who just lost both parents in a tragedy so profound, it sent her reeling, and on top of that, she was pregnant. Mother, you–" Pushing back from the desk, he strode over to the cabinet and punched the button viciously. Plucking out a bottle of scotch, he poured a liberal amount into the glass.

"You had no right," he said in a low, strained voice. "You almost caused her life with your uncaring attitude." He turned to face her, eyes blazing. "I swear to God, Mother, what I feel now for what you did to her, I am not sure I can forgive you or even look at you."

"I did it for us–"

"You sent her away!" he shouted. "I hated her for leaving and blamed her for years. When it was you." he took a deep breath. "Did you know where she was all along?"

"No, of course not."

"Why should I believe you?" he demanded.

"Because I am telling the truth. You are not a parent–"

"No, you saw to that, didn't you?" he said bitterly.

"You cannot put that on me. Her parents–"

"She was dealing with the scandal." he bit out. "You did not know her, but Camelia DeWinter is the strongest woman I know. Even then, when she was only a teen, she took what happened to her with grace and dignity.

She was going to pick up the pieces of her life and move on with my help. I promised that I would be there for her and you–" Tossing back the drink, he slammed the glass down.

"We couldn't have afforded the scandal," Hillary said defensively.

"It would have passed. We would have gotten through it. You interfered in my damn life and now, she doesn't want anything to do with me. God!" Dragging his fingers through his hair, he pressed the heels of his hands over his eyes. "Please leave. I would like to be alone."

"Hayes–"

"Mother, if you are harboring any notion of us moving past this, I suggest you leave the room right now."

Rising gracefully, she made her way out of the room and closed the door behind her. All along, Hayes thought achingly, all along, Camelia had been the wronged party.

And he had blamed her, hated her for what he thought were her offenses when she had been innocent. His heart twisted inside his chest as he reflected on what she must have gone through.

His mother had made her feel guilty, and she had borne that guilt—which had strengthened her decision to leave him without a word. She wished he had confided in him, said something to him so that he could reassure her that he was with her, no matter what.

He should have noticed the increased sadness on her exquisite face, how distant she had been, and that it was not just the scandal surrounding her parents' death.

Walking over to the desk, he picked up the phone and made the call.

"You answered."

"I am not going to apologize." He had to smile at the defiance in her tone.

"I am the one who should be apologizing. I said what I did in anger and did not mean a word of it."

"I cannot be with you, Hayes."

Closing his eyes, he took a breath. "Still trying to protect me, Cammy? Who the hell gave you the right?"

"I don't know what you mean."

"You damn well do. I just had an honest conversation with my mother. You were trying to protect me, were you? You decided on your damn own that leaving me was best for me—for us!" He tried to calm down. "You had no right–"

"I had every right!" she cried. "And blame her all you want, but your mother was right. She was protecting her son. She was protecting you."

"From what, for Christ's sake? Reporters salivating over the details? A few whispers here and there? It would have blown over."

"It started up again," she reminded him. "As soon as I came back home, the whispers started. Even your girlfriend could not help herself from mentioning it. I want it gone. I want my life back. I know things will never return to normal, but I want a life where people are not whispering about me–"

"And being with me is not going to accomplish that. I never figured you for being a coward."

"That's not going to work," she told him softly. "My mind is made up."

"Well let me 'unmake' it up for you. I am putting you on notice, my love. You are not slipping away from me again.

You don't get to make my decisions or decide what's best for me again. I am not letting you leave and darling, if you are thinking of leaving the country, remember that I am the CEO of one of the major airlines in the country. I will find you if I have to scour the ends of the earth to do so."

He waited while she remained silent. "Why?" she whispered.

"Because I cannot live without you," he told her simply. "I tried it, and it didn't work–"

"You will want children–"

"We will deal with that aspect when it's time."

"I cannot–"

"You can and you will," he told her implacably. "You said you needed time; I will give you a week–"

"I need more–"

"To do what exactly?"

"To sort things out. I have changed–"

"So have I," he told her firmly. "But one thing is certain. I am in love with you and that love is stronger than ever and I am not letting you go. Sleep on that."