27

“I said no comment,” Olivia’s dad repeated into the store’s phone, sounding angrier than Olivia had ever heard him. “Don’t call here again,” he said before hanging up.

“Who was it?” she asked, putting down the empty box that she’d gotten from the back of the furniture store onto the counter he was standing behind.

She’d started working in his store a few days earlier after a very subdued Christmas, and though it wasn’t exactly her dream job, she’d enjoyed it for the most part. It gave her a reason to get out of bed in the morning, and it meant she sometimes didn’t feel like her future was entirely over.

The negative voice in Olivia’s head had only grown stronger, but she was doing her best to fight against it. This job was part of that.

“No one,” her dad replied, but the tense set of his jaw told another story.

Olivia leaned her forearms on the counter. “Dad, you don’t have to lie. Who was it?”

“Some student reporter from the Hoya newspaper,” he admitted after a long pause, his blue eyes tired and sad as they met hers.

Her eyebrows pulled together. “What did they want?”

His gaze slid to the side, and his throat bobbed with a swallow. “They wanted a statement from you.”

“Have you gotten other calls here from people looking for me?” Olivia asked, her voice quiet with the realization that changing her phone number hadn’t kept her family from being hounded.

He winced. “A few.”

“What did they want a statement about?” Olivia asked.

Her dad looked reluctant to tell her but replied with a shake of his head. “He said the university is renaming one of the halls on campus and dedicating it to Drew.”

Olivia’s mouth went dry. “What?”

He shrugged. “I know that’s not something to get mad about, but calling here trying to get a statement from you means they want to stir up drama.”

Olivia gulped. “Yeah,” she agreed, her stomach feeling unsettled. “I guess.”

A customer walked in before her dad could say more. He walked over to the woman to ask her if she needed help, and while they spoke about sideboards, the phone rang again.

Olivia picked it up without thinking, said the store’s name, and asked how she could help.

“Is this Olivia Warner?” a male voice replied eagerly.

Olivia swallowed. “Who is this?”

“I write for the Hoya. Would you care to comment on what you said in that video?”

“No,” Olivia replied, her gaze going to her dad. She sent him a fake smile when their gazes met, and he turned back to the customer he was helping.

“Would you care to respond to the statement by one of Drew’s teammates saying you deserve to go to prison for what you did?”

Fighting the building pressure in her eyes, Olivia hung up the phone. She backed up, nearly tripping over an ottoman. After steadying herself, she picked up the empty box and set it on the dining table furthest from where her dad and the customer were standing.

Olivia started collecting the Christmas decorations scattered around the store, packing them haphazardly into the box. She tried to focus on the work instead of the phone calls, but her mind refused to be distracted by tinsel and stockings.

When the customer had left the store, Olivia took out her phone. She knew she shouldn’t, but she scrolled through her old messages, reading the accusations and the hateful words. After a few minutes, she put her phone away, but her thoughts went to Chris and his family as she walked around the store. She thought of all the people who hated her and all the people who would rather see her dead.

“Do you think I could get an Uber home and leave early?” she asked her dad once she’d packed away the last decoration.

Her dad’s forehead creased with concern. “Are you okay?”

Olivia smiled weakly. “Yeah. I just don’t feel so great.” She licked her dry lips. “I’ve got a really bad headache.”

Her dad frowned. “Do you want me to drive you home?”

Olivia shook her head. “No, I’ll be okay. You can’t leave the store unattended.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” he asked. “You look a bit pale.”

She nodded. “I’m fine. Just need to get home and take a painkiller.”

“Alright,” he said, still not looking convinced. “Just message me once you’re home.”

“I will,” she promised, and once she was back in the safety of the pool house, she did exactly that.

After closing the door behind her, Olivia let out a long, shaky breath through her mouth. She ran her hands through her hair and closed her eyes, wishing she could go back in time and change everything.

Olivia knew there was nothing she could do to fix it, though. Her fingers dug harder into her hair and her skull, and her breaths became choppier as she let herself fall apart. She didn’t fight the tears when they came.

“Olivia, look at me.”

Her eyes snapped open at the sound of Drew’s voice. He was standing right in front of her, his face only inches from her own.

“I love you,” he told her. “I love you so goddamned much.”

“You’re not real,” she said, her head shaking from side to side, and with a sigh, he disappeared.

You know what you have to do, the voice in her head said. You know it’s the only way.

“I just want it to stop hurting,” Olivia whispered. “I just want it all to stop.”

You can make it stop, the voice told her. Everyone would be happier if you did.

The voice was right. Her family loved her, but she knew they must have hated her for what she’d said in the video, and Chris and his family would probably celebrate when they found out. Olivia thought of the trial that awaited her and the jury that would probably hate her no matter what evidence Heather presented to them.

“I don’t think I can do it,” she whispered, even when all her thoughts were suggesting that she should. “I’m scared.”

Scared of finally being free? Scared of the pain ending?

Olivia swallowed past the ache in her throat and wiped her wet cheeks with the sleeve of her sweater. She walked through to her bathroom and grabbed what she needed before walking to the main house. Her ensuite bathroom had a shower, but she needed a bath for what she had planned.

She went upstairs to the guest bathroom, closed the door, and started filling the tub. Once she’d finished filling the bath with warm water, she filled the glass she’d taken from her own bathroom and opened the bottle of painkillers she’d grabbed from her bathroom vanity. She looked down at the pills in her hand and shook her head as another wave of hesitancy hit her.

“I can’t,” she choked out.

She didn’t want to do this to her family. She especially didn’t want them to be the ones who found her, but the voice in her head reminded her of all the reasons she had to end it. It reminded her of why she needed to do this until, eventually, her doubts faded behind the mountain of guilt and pain.

Olivia heard voices downstairs when she swallowed the first pill. It sounded like Riley and maybe Asher, but she didn’t bother unlocking the door. By the time anyone found her, it would be too late.