Chapter 9

Kendra had no idea what to say or how to act. Her face was buried on his chest, her body still vibrating. He had gone from being a man she despised to one she had conflicting feelings for, and she had no idea what to do about it—about him.

"Tired?" His deep voice rumbled against her cheek.

"No. Yes."

His chuckle teased her cheek. "Which is it?"

"No, I think."

Dipping his head down, he studied the top of hers, the short, glossy hair lying close to her scalp. Tipping her chin up, he searched her face quizzically. "That was unexpected."

"It was." She agreed, looking anywhere but in his eyes. "I suppose you should go to your room."

"Is that what you want?" He asked her quietly, ultimately putting her on the spot.

"I don't know." She tried to twist her chin away, but he held fast.

"I would like to stay if that's okay with you."

"I suppose."

A smile touched his sensuous lips. "Not a very enthusiastic response, but it will keep."

"Can you stop looking at me like that?"

"Like what?" His voice had dropped, his silver eyes turning hooded as he stared at her.

"You know, like what."

"Like I am about to make love to you again?" he shifted swiftly, his body covering hers. He laughed softly at the startled look on her exquisite face.

"It seems I am ready, and you are too. Unless you are sore?"

"No. I- "her body arched, fingers curling into his chest as he started moving slowly inside her.

"That's a, no?"

"No." Her hands went around his neck as she moved her body in tune with his. Before long, she was once again lost in the sensual pull of an attraction that had soon overtaken her senses.

*****

When she woke up the following day, he was gone. The only indication that he had spent the night was the indentation on the pillows and the faint scent of his cologne. Her body was sore and appeared to have been wonderfully used.

Sitting up against the pillows, she drew her legs up and dropped her chin on her knees, her expression bemused.

She did not want to examine what was happening, but she suspected it was something monumental, wonderful, and completely unexpected. She did not understand why he left that morning without waking her.

Swinging her legs off the bed, she hurried into the bathroom to shower. Dragging the flimsy nightgown over her head, she stood in front of the mirror, staring at her reflection. How on earth could she still look the same when everything had changed?

She wondered whimsically. But there was a new fullness to her breasts, and her nipples appeared larger and were undoubtedly more sensitive, or was it her imagination?

Passing a hand over her flat stomach, she closed her eyes briefly and recalled the things he had done to her. He had kept her up for most of the night, but surprisingly, she felt energized instead of exhausted. With a wry laugh, she turned towards the shower.

*****

Harvey had no idea what kind of mood he was in. He had sneaked out of her bedroom early this morning, ensuring he did not disturb her. He could try to rationalize and reason out what had been between them, but he was still not close to producing an explanation.

All he knew was that last night, if he had not had her, he would have gone crazy. And having her for most of the night had not quenched the awful thirst he was feeling where she was concerned.

She was his wife, and it was natural, no, it was expected that- No! He mentally shook his head and dismissed the appealing idea of having her again. She was his ‘accidental wife,' and that meant he should follow the damn rules which had gone to hell now because of what happened last night and this morning.

He had been careless, something he had never been before, at least not where sex was concerned. He had been abandoned by two teenagers experimenting with sex, and when it had gotten too difficult, they had left him at home to fend for himself.

Because of that, he was vigilant and incredibly responsible. He enjoyed sex without fear that there was going to be unwanted consequences.

But last night, he had not been thinking of that. All he could think of was wanting her, and nothing else mattered. Now, he was facing the fact that it was a real marriage, and when the time came, it would end in divorce, something he had not envisioned.

Twisting the cover off his water bottle, he shoved up from the electrical circuit he had been examining, strode over to a bench near the porch, and sat down heavily. He was not in the mood to talk, and the men, sensing that, were steering clear.

Good, he did not need company. He just wanted to be left alone with his thoughts. Tipping the bottle to his head, he took a long swallow, a brooding expression on his face.

*****

"My dear, you look adorable today." Julia beamed at her as she slid the chair out and took a seat. "Anything special going on today?"

"I have a wedding at the community center, particularly the bride."

"A lovely dress for a wedding," Julia remarked, admiring the plum-colored clinging wool. "You have such a lovely complexion."

"Thank you. Where is Silas?"

"He had an early morning session, and Gregory had a breakfast meeting. I did not hear when Harvey came in last night. Did you see him?"

Kendra almost spilled the coffee, and it took a supreme effort on her part to appear nonchalant.

"Briefly, yes."

"I am sorry he is still reticent and reluctant to try and make things work between you two."

Taking a sip of her coffee, Kendra hesitated briefly as she contemplated quickly what to say to her mother-in-law. Funny, she had never thought of her that way until now. And she realized that she wanted to be part of the family.

"It will work out." She promised.

"Oh, my dear, I hope so. Speaking of which, I jotted a reminder down because I tend to forget these things. The fall ball at the club where my husband and the boys are members will be this Saturday. I took the liberty of calling Monique Romano and asked her to send you some outfits. It's a masked ball and an annual event.

It is also for charity. I am responsible for organizing the event along with several wives of club members. She will be sending over everything, including accessories. Later, when you get home, I would like to see you in my suite. There are some lovely pieces of jewelry to which you are entitled."

"Oh, you don't have to go to all that trouble," Kendra exclaimed. It was one thing to want to be part of the family and quite another to let them spend money on her. She had no idea what was going to happen between her and Harvey. She knew what she wanted to happen, but it was not entirely up to her.

"Nonsense." Julia waved a hand dismissively. "You are my daughter-in-law, after all." With that parting sentence, Kendra carried it with her the entire day, and a feeling of well-being and happiness blossomed inside her.

Suddenly, decorating the community center was not such an arduous task after all, and she had started wearing the ring on her finger. Something that had not escaped the notice of her staff.

She took it off when tending to her plants, but she proudly wore it whenever she was on the floor or going somewhere. Of course, he did not call her, and she did not expect him to, but she was looking forward to tonight and being in his arms. Blowing out a shaky breath, she resumed her task.

*****

"I cannot decide, I am afraid," Julia told her with a rueful laugh as she tried on the fifth outfit. "I am leaning to either the black velvet with the red piping around the bosom or the shimmering green cashmere."

"My thoughts exactly. They feel so lovely against my skin, soft and airy as if I am not wearing anything." Kendra took another look in the mirror, a whimsical smile on her lips. "I have always been so modest in my dressing in the past."

"You have a lovely figure, and your complexion is suited for any color. The exciting thing is you get to keep everything." Julia gestured to the pile of clothing on the bed.

"I couldn't!"

"You can," the woman told her firmly. In addition to the clothing, shoes were strewn all over the floor, and accessories ranged from hammered gold belts and matching jewelry to handbags and purses. She did not dare think what they cost.

"Harvey has an account at Romano's as well as several other boutiques, but he doesn't care about that sort of thing." Julia smiled wryly. "He hates formal events and tries to avoid them at all costs. Now that you two are married, he is obligated to make appearances."

"Will he be attending?" Kendra asked casually as she picked up a shell pink blouse with an undertone of gold that shimmered in the light.

"Of course. He will not want to, but he won't be able to avoid it. It's a black-tie affair, and I must order the suit.' Julia gave her a speculative look. "Unless, of course, you want to take over that job."

Kendra fussed with the blouse, wanting something to do with her hands. "I am not certain he would want me interfering."

"He won't know the difference." Julia gave her a thoughtful look. "If I may say something, my dear, things seem different for you."

"What do you mean?"

Setting the space beside her on the bed, Julia waited for her to sit. "When you first came here to live, you were tense, angry, and upset. This morning, you looked happy, and even now, a glow about you is unmistakable."

Taking Kendra's hand in hers, she squeezed gently. "I married Gregory out of duty because our parents considered it an excellent match. It did not take long for us to become friends, and then we fell in love.

It's been happening for over thirty years, and we are still in love. It can be the same for you and Harvey. Something happened last night, if I miss my guess."

Shaking her head, Kendra laughed shakily. "After he tended to me during my migraine episode, there was a change, a shift if you may, in the way I saw him." She took a deep breath and gazed at the rose and gold wallpaper. "I went to see him at the trailer to thank him, and – we – he kissed me and- Oh Lord."

Using her free hand, she fanned herself. "We were together last night. I know there is a long way for us to go, and I have no idea how he feels- "

"But you feel something," Julia interjected gently, hope flaring inside her chest. "And I cannot tell you how happy that makes me. You are perfect for each other, but I must warn you, my dear. If he feels anything for you, and I am sure he does, he will avoid you at all costs. Harvey does not handle emotions very well.

It took years for him to open up to us, and even now, there is still some reticence where he is concerned. It is hard for him to say, ‘I love you.' He will show that he does, of course, by the things he does. He never hugs and is uncomfortable with public displays of affection."

She linked her fingers with Kendra's. "But you must take the initiative and fight for what you want. And when you do, I am confident that you will experience a love above anything else you have ever known."

*****

But Julia's hope and optimism, as well as the lovely speech she had made inside the bedroom, dissolved when it became apparent that her husband was not coming home. After waiting for hours, she turned out the lamp and settled against the pillows, closing her eyes and trying to get some sleep.

His mother's words came back to her.

"Don't give up on him, my dear. He was always waiting to be rejected when he got here. He could never believe we could love him because his parents abandoned him. It took us years, patience, and tolerance to assure him he was wanted.

When I became pregnant with Silas, it became worse. He did some pretty awful things to test him and get us to send him away. He is not an easy man to love."

She was beginning to realize that, Kendra thought with a sinking heart as she glanced at the clock. She had not heard him come in at almost eleven thirty. She had left the door ajar to invite him into her room.

She had just pulled the sheets over her when she heard movements coming from his room. Gripping the sheets between tensed fingers, she forced her heart to stop beating so fast and held her breath, wondering if he was coming in.

Thirty minutes had passed before she stared at the door that had started to open slowly, indicating that he was coming in.

What should she do? She wondered frantically, her breathing accelerating. She could pretend to be fast asleep but did not want to appear coy. At the same time, she did not want him to think she was easy prey.

She felt that women would fall all over themselves for him, and she would not be one of them. She was also not privy to how to act in a sophisticated manner.

She watched him hover inside the doorway, pondering whether to enter the room. She gripped the sheets and waited tensely while he seemed to be battling indecision. Letting her breath out softly when he started moving forward, she watched as he came to stand at the edge of the bed.

He jolted in surprise when he realized she was wide awake and watching him.

"I thought you were sleeping."

"And you didn't want to wake me." She supplied.

"No. Why are you still awake?"

"I was a little restless."

"Aren't you going to ask me where the hell I have been?" he asked, lifting a sardonic brow.

"Should I?"

"It's the wifely thing to do, I suppose." He told her with a shrug.

"And if I ask, would you tell me?"

"No." He was watching her closely. The room was in shadows, but sufficient light from the moon filtered through the drapes for her to see his face.

"Then I won't ask."

"Just like that?"

She nodded.

"And if I say I want to join you in bed?"

Instead of responding, she turned down the sheets and moved over with enough space for him to climb in.

Training his silver eyes on her, he waited a beat before climbing in. He did not reach for her as she expected but stacked his hands behind his head and stared at the ceiling. Kendra waited, suspecting he had something on his mind and wanted to talk. She was so happy he was here next to her that it did not matter if he remained silent.

"I considered sleeping in the trailer; that's where I was."

"What changed your mind?" She asked him softly.

Turning his head, he stared at the exquisite face scrubbed clean of all makeup. Her short cap of permed hair was brushed and was a perfect foil for her small face. His eyes drifted to her lips, and he felt the lust churning through his body at an alarming rate.

He had spent hours sitting on the bed in his mobile home, tormented with visions of her, the taste of her mouth and the texture of her nipples, and most of all, the passion that sprung up between them and had felt a yearning that had sent him running here.

"I want you." He told her abruptly. "It's that simple."

"Okay." To his surprise, she did not argue but moved into his arms. Hesitating for a fraction, he moved his hands and closed them around her, bringing her onto his chest.

"I smell of tobacco." He told her gruffly. "I smoke when I am stressed or when I am doing much thinking. If that's something that offends you- "

"It doesn't." She told him hastily, moving into his arms and inhaling the masculine scent of his body wash.

"Oh." For a second, he had no idea what to say next. He had come here, expecting her to be fast asleep and wondering if he should just slide into bed next to her and wake her with his mouth. "I don't know what this is, but I am intensely attracted to you. I never had relationships because that's not who I am. We are in this – this thing- "

"You mean a marriage?" she asked innocently, turning her head to gaze up at him.

He stared at her for a minute, a frown touching his brow, his silver eyes expressionless. "I suppose you could call it that." There was a glint of amusement in his eyes. "We have complicated things, haven't we?"

"I would say we have." She agreed solemnly.

"I- we did not use anything. Not that I expected you to be on anything, considering you were innocent. But I should have – I usually do- "He shook his head as he realized he was rambling. She made him nervous for some reason.

Perhaps it's the fact that he had taken her innocence and was the first man for her somehow that simultaneously made him feel strange and proud. He had spent hours thinking of the implications and what it meant. "There might be a child- "His arms tightened around her waist unconsciously. "I don't know how the hell to be a dad- "

"Being a parent would be new for me too." She reminded him softly.

"Why are you being so calm about this? I thought you hated me."

"Hate is such a strong word." She murmured. "I thought you were harsh and cynical- "

"I still am." He interrupted dryly.

"Are you?" Shifting slightly, she swung a leg over both of his. "I am beginning to think otherwise."

"You would do well not to forget that- "He hissed out a breath when she used her knee to nudge that susceptible part of him. "Stop."

"I love how you make me feel." She whispered, climbing on top of him. "I spent the daydreaming about how deep you were inside me. I- "She gasped when his hand rubbed her neck.

"Do you know what I spent the day doing?" He asked thickly, his body already primed and ready for her.

"What?"

"This- "He wedged a hand between their bodies and pushed aside the flimsy sides of her panties so that he could touch her sensitive flesh. "And this- "Her body arched when he dipped a finger into her wet warmth.

"Kiss me." He whispered, eyes smoldering with latent passion. Her head bent towards his, her lips brushing against his.

Opening his mouth, he captured her sweet tongue between his teeth, his fingers driving into her until she was writhing on top of him frantically. His thumb stroked her flesh and sent the climax crashing through her like a volcano erupting.

Swallowing her moans, he waited until she had partially recovered from the climax before lifting her and placing her on top of his throbbing cock. He still had his sweatpants on but was not wearing underwear. The groan was torn from his chest as her silky tightness sheathed him like a glove.

A shudder raged through his body as the thought swept through him. He had been her first – good God, he had been the first man for her!