Chapter 17

CHAPTER

SEVENTEEN

B ailey circulated on the outskirts of Bryce and Codi’s wedding, right where she wanted to be. Her cousins had formed a tight knot around her, and Stockton especially never let her get too far from him.

When she finished a drink, he took it from her and after the first alcoholic one, he’d replaced her liquid with sparkling cider. He’d danced with her in the corner, and he’d glared away anyone who looked like they might ask her to do something—anything—she didn’t want to do.

That list wasn’t exhaustive by any means, and all Bailey had to do was lift her hand and brush her hair away with two fingers, and Stockton would swoop in. Right now, he stood immediately next her, and she looked around.

Her parents still sat at a nearby table, along with Stockton’s. “You gonna dance with anyone?” she asked.

“Not here,” he said .

“If you’re so salty about finding someone in Coral Canyon,” she said without looking at him. “Why don’t you move?”

“I like the stables here.” He lifted his drink to his lips, and he still had something stronger than cider. Something he hadn’t even finished yet, and they’d been celebrating with dinner and dancing for almost two hours.

Everything about it exhausted Bailey. If she ever got married, it would be a private, quiet affair at the ranch where she’d grown up. Under the open sky like Bryce and Codi, sure. But not this many people.

Of course, Bryce’s family alone could fill a banquet hall, no non-blood relations needed. She spotted him with his uncle Luke, the two of them laughing over something. He exuded charm, goodness, and happiness, even from across the room, and Bailey did smile at it. At him.

“What about you?” Stockton asked. “You’ve been a scared rabbit all day today.”

“I don’t live here,” she said. “I’m not interested in anyone who lives here.”

Stockton took another tiny sip of his drink. “So you’re not interested in coming home ever?”

Bailey’s first reaction was to say, “No, not ever.” But she’d learned a lot in the past decade, and one of those things was to never say never. “I don’t know,” she admitted. “Life is an open book, you know? A path could open up that brings me back here one day. I just don’t know.”

Stockton looked at her, pure surprise in his eyes. “Wow, Bay. I wasn’t expecting that from you. ”

She nudged him with her sequined hip. “I’m not as salty as you thought, is what you mean.”

He grinned and shook his head in a cowboy way of saying, that’s not what I meant, but I’m not going to argue about it.

Bailey did like cowboys. She always had. For a while there, she’d wanted to ride the barrel racing circuit or work with horses the way Stockton did. She’d always had a keen love and soft spot for animals, and she loved her veterinary practice in Butte.

It seemed, however, that the cowboys there either left while they were young and came back broken when they were older, or they married young and settled down on ranches of their own. A severe lack of men between the ages of twenty-seven and thirty-seven—Bailey’s self-imposed age range—existed, and she hadn’t been out with anyone in a long time. A couple of years now.

Something inside her ached to be held by a good man again. She longed to be looked at the way Bryce looked at Codi, or the way her daddy looked at her momma.

“Oh, boy,” she said, half hiding her lips behind her champagne flute. “Your daddy is coming in hot.”

Stockton barely had time to react before his father arrived. Uncle Eli looked at him with a frown between his eyes, then switched his gaze to Bailey, where everything softened. “You two hidin’ out over here?”

“No, sir,” they recited together. She smiled, because while she was several years older than Stockton, they’d gotten along spectacularly for decades. Gotten into a lot of trouble too, but the past didn’t need to be dredged up tonight.

“Bailey,” Uncle Eli said. “OJ is looking for you.” He swallowed a couple of times, almost like he couldn’t quite get something to go down. Before he said anything else, Bailey’s pulse jackhammered through her whole body.

“I know what he wants,” she said quietly, barely above the din of the party.

“It’s not a solo dance,” Uncle Eli said. “And we’ve talked about it—the brothers and I—and we’ll surround you two so everyone won’t be staring at you.”

She lifted her glass to her lips again, but found she was the one who couldn’t swallow. Her feet felt swollen and huge inside her heels, and she actually started looking for the exit.

“It’s not awkward,” Stockton murmured. “Everyone knows about you two, and you go see him all the time now.”

“I know.” Bailey lowered her glass, and Uncle Eli plucked it right from her hand.

“Both of y’all need to stop loitering in this corner and go dance with someone,” he said.

“I have danced with someone,” Stockton said.

“Yeah, her.” Uncle Eli gave him a glare that seemed a little harsh for such an occasion. “You brought that woman to this, and you’ve ignored her all night. It’s not right.”

Bailey’s heartbeat somersaulted now. “You brought a date?”

Stockton had the decency to duck his head, and while the party was dark and only lit by the softest yellow lights, she could still see the flush crawling up his neck. “She knows it’s not a date.”

“She does not know that,” Uncle Eli said. “She’s dressed to the nines and putting on a brave face, but your mother’s sitting with her, and it is not looking good. She’s going to burst out crying at any moment. So either get over there and be with your date, or take her home.” He made an angry noise, almost like a correction he’d give one of the horses up at the commercial stables at the lodge. “You’re better than this.”

With that, Uncle Eli turned on his boot heel and marched away. Bailey watched him go, shocked into stillness when she caught sight of Aunt Meg sitting with a gorgeous brunette. She indeed wore a beautiful blue dress with plenty of glinting gems, pearls around her neck and dripping from her ears, and only eyes for Stockton.

“Who is that?” Bailey asked as she looked their way.

“Darla Lyons,” he said with a heavy sigh. “You weren’t sure if you were coming, and I did—I absolutely did tell her that if you came, I wouldn’t have much time for her.”

“Stock.” Bailey didn’t know what else to say. “You didn’t—you should’ve canceled with her.” She clearly liked him, and one look at Stockton told Bailey there had been a spark for him too.

And she’d stood in the way of it.

“Go,” she said in a bark. “Go right now. I’m fine. I’m going to dance with OJ.” Just saying the words out loud made her lungs seize. “And I’m going to say my goodbye’s.” She didn’t need to be here much longer. Bryce wouldn’t care, and she hadn’t come for him or Codi anyway.

She hadn’t even come for OJ.

She’d come for herself. She’d come to prove to herself that she was ready to move on. That she could come back to Coral Canyon anytime she wanted to or needed to, and that she wouldn’t be followed by nightmares, sideways glances, or gossip.

She saw the pure miracle of forgiveness and healing every time she looked at Bryce, which she did now. He stood next to OJ, bent over to hear what his biological son had to say. Then they both looked out into the crowd, and Bailey pushed Stockton in front of her.

“You go on. Get Darla and come dance by me and OJ.”

“Okay,” he said sheepishly, stumbling for a step or two before he evened his stride.

Bailey stepped out from underneath the edge of the tent and lifted her hand. She hated anything or anyone that called attention to her, that brought eyes to her she didn’t want. But OJ was a huge part of Bryce’s life, and of course he’d been a huge part of this wedding too.

“He danced with his momma,” Bailey muttered to herself as Bryce caught sight of her. And Bryce hadn’t spoken to his mom for years.

She could dance with OJ.

Bryce pointed to her, and their beautiful boy lit up like the Christmas tree did at Whiskey Mountain Lodge. He was so good , and so happy, and Bailey attributed all of that to Bryce too. In so many ways, right down to the shape of his face and his shock of dark hair, OJ was exactly like Bryce.

She’d contributed to half of his genes, and Bryce had told her all of the ways OJ was like her. He didn’t like bananas, and he thought real seriously about people and things and situations. He’d been organizing a candy-and-cards initiative for the men and women who were deployed from the state of Wyoming, and his class had been sending them messages and care packages all year.

He cared about people, and he wanted to rescue every animal he came in contact with. Bryce said all of that came from her. So he looked like Bryce, but he acted like Bailey, and she let her heart fill with love with every step she took toward them.

“Hey, you,” she said when she reached OJ. She pulled him into her chest for a hug. “I heard we’re having a dance together.” She refused to flick her gaze to Bryce to see if this was okay. She’d been slowly making her way back to center for a long time, and this was just one more tick.

Fine, it constituted about ten ticks, but repairing her relationship with Bryce and starting one with OJ wasn’t the only thing she’d been working on.

“Yeah,” OJ said. “Is that okay? It’s not gonna be a spotlight or anything.”

“We won’t even announce it, Bay,” Bryce said.

“Yeah, I know.” She took OJ’s hand and finally allowed herself to look at Bryce. He really was the most handsome cowboy in the whole world, and she wondered if she’d ever stop thinking so. She sure hoped so .

In that moment, Bailey wanted to meet someone else. Someone who would make her pulse frog around in her chest, and someone who would take care of her and their children, and someone who she could dance with in the spotlight at her own wedding—as long as there wasn’t a whole bunch of other people to watch them.

Of course, her family wasn’t exactly under-the-radar-flyers either, but they’d do anything for her.

Another realization hit her as quickly as the one she’s just had about her love life: Her family loved her and had never stopped loving her. She’d been the one to withdraw from them, because her own shame and guilt had mandated it.

Not anymore.

“Hey,” Bryce said. “You still here with us?” He put his hand on her elbow, and Bailey blinked back to the present.

“Yes.” She cleared her throat, realizing how emotional she sounded. “Yes, I’m fine.”

“Tell ‘er what song you picked, bud,” Bryce said. “It’s coming up.”

“It’s one my daddy wrote,” OJ said. “Well, him and Harry. It’s gonna be on Harry’s new album next spring.”

“That’s amazing,” Bailey said, her smile full and real now. “What’s it called?”

“The Clock on the Wall,” OJ said. “I know how it starts, so when it does, we’ll just go out, okay?” He looked over to her and then past her to Bryce. “Bryce taught me how to dance so I won’t be steppin’ on your feet or nothing.”

He sounded like a miniature cowboy, and Bailey tipped her head back and laughed. “He taught you how, huh?” She beamed down at OJ. “Did he tell you he’s not that great of a dancer?”

OJ grinned right on back. “He didn’t, but Uncle Tex did, and he showed me a few things too.”

“Mm,” Bailey said, feeling sparkly on the inside and the outside. The song keeping people on the dance floor right now ended, and another one didn’t start up right away. She wondered how long she’d have to stand there with the two of them, without Codi around. All of it made her stomach clench and a line of marching ants to parade through her bloodstream.

“All right, folks,” a man said, and Bailey knew Harry Young’s voice. The world over knew the man’s voice. “I’ve got a special concert for you tonight—one song from my album that I haven’t even recorded yet. I wrote it with my uncle Otis, and we’re gonna give you the acoustic version tonight for one of our last dances. Then, Country Quad will play a medley, and we’ll wrap this shindig right on up.”

He too sounded like he’d swallowed four or five cowboys to get that perfectly sexy, strong twang, and his guitar rang through the night in the next moment.

“This is it,” OJ said needlessly, and he tugged on Bailey’s hand.

She went with him as the floor flooded with people, her momma and daddy included. They moved right in close to Bailey and OJ, as did Uncle Eli and Aunt Meg, Uncle Andy and Aunt Becca, and Uncle Beau and his country music star wife, Aunt Lily .

They all had adult children like her, and her cousins packed the dance floor with their dates as well. Bryce and Codi found a spot, and all the Youngs came out with their wives as well.

Bailey stood a little taller than OJ still, but he’d surely shoot past her in the next couple of years as he hit puberty and became a teenager. She had a sudden urge to see all of that, be right here to witness every day, every month, every change.

At the same time, she’d given up that right a long time ago. Otis and Georgia didn’t have to include her nearly as much as they did, even now. How could she ever repay them for taking her son and loving him so completely? Raising him so well, when she wouldn’t have been able to?

“Who’s your momma dancing with?” she asked, a horrible thought landing in her mind.

OJ looked up to her. “I don’t know.”

“Well, she needs someone if your daddy is playing the guitar,” Bailey said. Tex and Abby swayed nearby, both of them watching her and OJ with kind smiles on their faces. Bailey didn’t deserve their kindness.

Yes, you do.

The voice in her head boomed loudly, almost as if Harry had stopped playing and singing and had shouted it into the microphone. Bailey even looked around to see if anyone else had heard it.

No one seemed to, and Bailey understood it was a voice from On High, speaking directly to her.

“Maybe Grandpa,” OJ said, and Bailey nodded, still scanning for Georgia. Her heart would break if she found her on the sidelines alone while everyone else had someone special to dance with during this musical number.

A sense of love and belonging filled her, and every breath Bailey took expanded her lungs and her being until she felt like she could shoulder whatever eyes came in her direction. She could, because she was a deserving, loveable woman.

Tears filled her eyes, just as they had in her parents’ basement only a few days ago. This time, though, they didn’t stem from a feeling of being trapped or like she’d been thrown back in time.

This time, they came because God had just filled her with His spirit. He’d just reclaimed her from the land of the lost, and He’d just reminded her of how very loved she was.

By her parents. By Him. And by everyone at this party.

So while she’d choked back tears and smiled a plastic grin at everyone for days, and she’d just told Bryce she was fine, Bailey wasn’t fine.

She was whole. Finally, finally whole again.

And that meant it was okay for her to cry.

She did, becoming the blubbering mess she’d feared she’d be at this wedding. The tears slid down her face faster than she could even lift her hand to begin wiping them, which was why she’d stationed Stockton at her side.

But with him gone, and only OJ in front of her, Bailey couldn’t help her emotions.

“Are you sad or happy?” he asked in a tiny voice, and Bailey looked down at him through her tears .

She sobbed, a horrible sound she wished never to make again, but she smiled. “I’m better,” she said. “It’s a good better. It’s…good. Happy.”

He nodded and said, “Sometimes my momma cries when she’s happy too.” He looked to his left, and Bailey followed his gaze. Georgia stood there, and she seemed spotlighted by a string of tea lights. They made it easy to see the love for her son—as well as an underlying anxiety that only grew when she saw Bailey crying.

“You should dance with her,” Bailey said, turning back to him. “I love you so much, OJ. You are the best boy in the whole world. You know that, right?”

He nodded, his eyes a little too wide. She was probably scaring him, and she quickly wiped her face as best she could. “I’m going to pass you to her, okay? Then I have to go, but we’ll still go to breakfast in a couple of days, before I go back to Butte.”

“Okay.” He stopped dancing and wrapped his strong, skinny arms around her. She hugged him tight, tight, tight too, sealing part of him inside her to take with her no matter where she went.

She’d spent so long trying to keep him out, when what she’d needed to do was let him in. Let Bryce in. Let the Youngs in. Let her parents in.

Let God in.

Now that she had, Bailey felt like a phoenix rising from the ashes of the past decade as she turned toward Georgia and gestured her forward. She came, because Georgia was a strong, powerful, and protective mother in her own right .

She nearly collided with Bailey she hugged her so hard. “Are you okay?”

“I’m so good,” she whispered. “Thank you so much for—” She didn’t know how to finish. Another round of emotions cut off her vocal cords, and Bailey just stepped back, her eyes filled with tears and making Georgia blurry. “I am so good now. I feel so good.”

Georgia nodded, and Bailey stepped back and indicated OJ. “He wanted to dance with his momma.”

And while that person wasn’t her, Bailey would always have a place in his heart. In his life. And here in Coral Canyon.

OJ grinned at Georgia, and she smiled right on back at him. They began to dance, and Bailey needed to get off this dance floor quickly. She turned, only to be met with her parents. They’d edged closer and closer, and they took her into their arms. Both of them, easily, without a word. Bailey cried silently against her mother’s shoulder while her daddy’s strong arms held them both up.

Someone else joined them, and Bailey would know that cologne anywhere. Bryce. Codi pressed in behind her too, and then Uncle Eli and Aunt Meg were there, padding their group hug with more arms, and more bodies, and all the acceptance in the world.

“Love you, Bailey,” someone said, and she didn’t even know who. Cecily and Jerry Young stood right behind her daddy, and she tried to smile at them. More aunts and more uncles arrived, Youngs and Whittakers alike, all of them insulating her, encapsulating her, hugging her .

Accepting her.

Healing her.

Rescuing her.

Murmurs of love and friendship filled the whole space, and Bailey finally found a way through her tears to the other side. The side where her emotions reigned, sure. But where she could feel them for what they truly were and not be embarrassed or upset by them.

The side where God lived and joy stood supreme.

A side where Bailey finally felt like she belonged. She’d done the work; she’d fought the fight; she’d humbled herself and repented; she’d walked through that fire.

And now, she’d come home.