Chapter 50

Jack's arms slipped around my waist, both of us still standing in the kitchen with Kai and Alma. We'd stuck around when Alma returned and started talking about all sorts of things.

It felt good to be in his arms and be doing something chilled. It was clear he had a good relationship with Kai and was as relaxed around them as Alma made me feel with her.

We'd talked a little more about the island, too, which had helped me calm even further. We'd be essentially stranded on it with nothing but a yacht to get off it with, but the yacht would still be there, and it had a crew who would sail me back to a bigger island with an airport at a moment's notice.

I'd also been assured the band would be there with us, and the house on the island was incredibly comfortable, with plenty of space for everyone and a gorgeous view for miles.

It sounded heavenly, and part of me was excited. From the moment I met Jack, I'd been sucked into a life full of wonderful houses, plenty of money, and someone to do pretty much everything they wanted for them.

And on top of that, they played music whenever they wanted and spent the rest of the time hanging out and chatting.

If I hadn't seen the level of work that also went into their songs and music, I'd have thought they had the laziest, easiest lives possible. It was clear they loved making music, however, and they were willing to work at something until they felt they'd got it right.

"Come on, we should let these two have some peace and quiet, and I should make sure the island will be ready," Jack said.

There was no way I was going to argue with Jack. Either he knew his friends wanted and needed some space, or he wanted me to himself elsewhere. I was good with either.

After promising to see the couple the next day and fly out to the island together, Jack led me to his waiting car, his men already there. Once again, it made me wonder if they were always there or if Jack was really good at summoning them without making it obvious.

Either way, I found myself grateful as I slipped into the back of the car, and Jack followed. It was just the two of us again and we were returning to the more familiar territory of his penthouses.

Although I hadn't been there for many days, they felt safer and more like a home than Kai and Alma's had. Possibly because I hadn't been threatened in either of the penthouses so far. Having one to go back to when I wanted also made me feel like I had some way to put distance between us if I needed to. It was a safety net.

Jack didn't say anything at first, staring off into space, his face serious, a frown playing at the corners of his mouth. I wanted to reach for him and bring him back to where I was, but I wasn't sure I dared.

Instead, I tried to distract myself with something else, worried that he was withdrawing from me after everything that had happened the night before and not sure what I could do about it.

"Do you truly want to come to the island tomorrow?" Jack asked a few minutes later, his words taking me by surprise.

"Of course," I replied. "I've never been to the Bahamas before."

"And that's your reason for saying yes?" He finally looked at me and studied me, his gaze laser-focused, his jaw snapped shut with a force that made me instantly feel scared. Was he about to lose his temper with me?"

"No. I mean, of course that's a reason." I closed my mouth and gulped. What were my exact reasons? Why had I said yes?

Jack shifted to look my way even more, but he crossed his arms, and I got the feeling this wasn't going well. Not sure what else to do, I decided to be honest.

"I want to come to be with you, but honestly, I'm also scared. It hasn't been long since Greg hurt me. And I haven't known you long."

"So you don't trust me?" he asked, almost interrupting me.

"I want to trust you."

"They're not the same thing."

"I know." Again, I looked away, feeling his hurt and not sure what to do about it.

"I won't make you come. You can go back to England if you'd rather. If I'm not what you want, then just say it, and we'll?—"

"No, I don't want to go back to England at all. I want to come. I want to be with you and give us a chance. But I'm… The memories of what Greg did in the past are still just below the surface. And Logan yesterday really didn't help. It's not that I don't trust you so much as I wouldn't trust anyone right now."

"Then maybe you shouldn't come at all. I don't want to walk on eggshells the whole time, even if I can understand why you're scared. I'm not your ex."

I sighed, feeling the indignance in his voice like a punch to the stomach. He wasn't wrong, but at the same time, could I push myself past this? Was I being unfair to Jack by making him accommodate this fear? Did I just need to decide to trust him anyway?

"I talked to Alma about it. We agreed that I should come anyway. That trying to trust you in as safe a way as I could was the best I could offer. I'm sorry if that's not enough. I'm trying to get past the fear, but I can't just magic it away, either."

Jack seemed to freeze as I finished this sentence, only a few blinks showing me he was still alive and functioning.

"If you don't want me to come, I'll understand, but I'd like to. I want to give you my trust. Will you give me a chance to work up to it?"

Jack exhaled and then nodded.

"Yes. I want you there. I just…" He trailed off as he ran a hand through his hair. "I don't want you to fear me."

I scooted across the back seat so I could take his hand.

"I don't directly. The idea of no safety net scares me more than what you might do to me. So far, everything you've done to me has been…amazing."

Smirking, I thought of all the hot sex we'd been having. It had been phenomenal, and my words brought a light back into Jack's eyes.

He reached out for me and pulled me into his arms. Instantly, everything felt right again. Being safe in his arms made everything feel better.

However, despite the gentle way he held me close and kissed me, I kept imagining the look in his eyes as I told him I couldn't let him tie me up. Something inside him was desperate to be trusted. But could I give him that?

I had no idea.