Chapter 22

Chapter Twenty-Two

T hey were quiet as he drove back to the B and B. Vivian stared out the window, while Dallas glanced her way occasionally, not liking the vibe. It made him uneasy, this silence. But he understood it.

It was a lot. Meeting their daughter. Knowing they'd had a hand in creating a person he thought was extraordinary. She was funny, smart, wise beyond her years. She was so like Vivian, it was uncanny.

And her eyes. Damn. It was like looking in a mirror at eyes he'd gotten from his father and grandfather before him. Dallas thought about all these things as he parked the car. By now, it was nearly ten in the evening, and the air was alive with night sounds. The B and B threw soft light from the windows. He got out of the car and walked around to the other side, waiting for Vivian to exit. When she did, she stared up at him in silence, her expression guarded.

"What's going on inside that head of yours?" he asked quietly.

Her chest rose and fell rapidly, and her pulse was visible at her neck. It sang a song of its own, one of anxiety, maybe fear.

"A year ago, I was in Alaska living my life. Ignoring the past the only way I could, which was to lock it away and forget." She let out a shuddering breath. "Seeing you again changed everything."

"It took a bit," he replied with a half-smile. "You blew into Montana like a cold Canadian wind."

"You weren't exactly welcoming."

"I guess we were both a little gun-shy."

"We didn't trust each other. And we had good reason not to."

He had nothing for that because she wasn't wrong.

"What now?" he asked, watching her closely. Shadows covered half her face, and he couldn't see her eyes properly.

"I need to get this right. I need to be sure, or all this was for nothing."

"What does that mean?" He frowned and took a step closer.

"I need to figure this out, Dallas." She licked her lips nervously. "I need some space."

"Don't give me that bullshit, Viv. I'm not letting you push me away this time." He swore, shoulders hunched forward as if he was about to do battle.

"Don't be like that."

"I'm pissed."

"I know," she said softly. "But if you come to my room or I go to your room, we both know how we'll be spending the night, and it won't be talking or sleeping."

Something inside him cracked wide open, and he reached for her. "Would that be so wrong?"

She leaned into his touch and kissed his palm, then looked up at him, heartbreak in the shadows that played across her face. "I need to remember how I got here. What mistakes I made. There are things I need to work on. Things I need to fix. And when I'm with you, I can't see straight. I can't focus. You take up so much room. Does that make sense?"

He was frustrated, but this wasn't about him. He might not like it, but he had to respect that. "I'll do whatever you need me to do. I meant what I said. You're not in this alone."

"Thank you," she whispered, pulling away, though her fingers lingered in his hand. For a few seconds, the only thing he heard was the sound of his own heartbeat, the rush of blood in his ears, and a lone owl hooting in the distance. "I'll see you in the morning." With one last glance his way, Vivian turned and disappeared inside the house, leaving Dallas alone in the dark. He wasn't ready to head in just yet. If he was a smoker, now would be a good time to light one up. As it was, he'd given up that nasty habit years ago and would have preferred a bottle of JD.

"Shit," he muttered, eyeing up the house, but not willing to snoop through Miss Callie's bar stock to see what she had. He had nothing but his thoughts to keep him company. Restless, he walked around back, where he found a spot to sit by the big old oak that guarded the premises.

It was early enough back home to make a call, so he grabbed his cell and hit up his sister. Jade answered on the second ring.

"Where in hell are you?"

"Should I hang up now?" Dallas rolled his eyes and settled back in the chair.

"Don't roll your eyes at me," she scoffed.

He opened his mouth, but she stopped him before he began.

"I know you better than you know yourself," she said silkily.

"Is that so?" He needed this. The familiar back-and-forth with his sister.

"I went by your place today."

"I heard."

"Your ranch hand Griff is a dick."

"He says you're a pain in the ass with a loud voice and a mean right hook. He's not wrong, though I didn't ask about the right-hook thing. I figured that's between you and him." His sister swore a blue streak, and he grinned, thankful for the distraction. "You done squawking?"

"No," she retorted, "but I can save the rest for some other time."

"Joy."

"Always a smart-ass."

"An attribute we both share."

"So, where are you?"

He considered making up a story, but just like with the eye roll, Jade could smell a lie better than a hound dog in the hunt.

"Louisiana."

"Really." She didn't bother to hide the surprise in her voice. "This must have something to do with Vivian."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because after I ran into Dickhead Griff at your place, I headed over to see Benton, and he was busy dealing with her bag-of-bones dog. He told me she was away for a few days, and when I asked after you, Benton suddenly clammed up. So, I figure if she's away and you're away, then this involves both of you."

"There's no pulling the wool over your eyes."

"You're going to have to explain the Louisiana connection."

Dallas sat back and rotated his head, then stretched out his shoulders. God, he was wound up tighter than a top.

"Dal?" his sister prodded.

"I'm here."

"What are you doing in Louisiana?"

"Vivian and I have a kid."

Silence greeted his words, and then his phone made a weird noise, and no longer were they talking like birds on a wire, but he was staring at her face on his screen.

"Can you repeat that, please?" Christ, she looked like their mother.

He glanced away for a moment, trying like hell to compose himself, and then he shrugged. "All those years ago when she left. She was pregnant."

"But you never said…you never…" His sister was rattled. She kept biting her thumb nail.

"I never knew."

"Oh." Her brow furrowed into a deep frown.

"Until now."

Jade sat down. "And this child is in Louisiana?"

He nodded.

"Why in hell didn't she tell you? How could she keep that from you?" Anger flared beneath Jade's words, a small flame that would burn hot if he didn't shut this down.

"I'm not doing that with you, Jade. You don't get to judge." His tone was firm. "You don't know the details. Don't know what it was like back then for her or me."

"Then tell me."

"That's our business. Our history."

Jade pursed her lips, shaking her head slowly. "Then help me understand what is going on with you. Are you and Vivian back together?"

"I think so."

"You think ?" Her voice was sharp, and he did a mental eye roll.

"Are you ever going to give her a break?" he barked.

"When she stops hurting you, I'll think about it."

"You've never liked her."

"There wasn't much to like. She was a bitch. Only you never saw it because, like most men, you were thinking with your dick."

"That's not fair," he retorted, not bothering to hide his anger.

"Isn't it?" she shot back.

"You thought we had it bad with our dad? He was an asshole who didn't treat Mom the way he should have, and he preferred the company of animals to those of his kids, but shit, we didn't go to bed at night in fear. Did you never think Vivian acted that way because she was a young girl who had no mother? Or acknowledge that her father was an alcoholic nightmare? He was a pathetic, mean drunk and took a lot out on those Bridgestone kids, especially the older ones. She lived with that. Not you. Not me. Vivian did."

Jade looked down, and when she glanced back up at him, he knew he'd hit a nerve.

"I guess…I mean, we all knew Manley wasn't in a good way."

"Benton had a hard time, but it was nothing compared to what Vivian lived through. When she lost her mother, she lost everything, and yeah, she acted out and used her words and actions to push people away, but that's how she coped. But she made it through, and she's become one hell of a woman."

"You love her." Jade looked shocked, and her voice dropped. "You really love her."

"I've been trying to?—"

"No, I thought this was an obsession or addiction. Maybe just unfinished business, but it's not."

"It's always only been her. And now…now she's telling me she wants to deal with this on her own, and I don't know how to let her without making a mess of things."

Silence greeted his confession, and when his sister spoke, she did so through a smile. "Vivian is still Vivian. You might want to let her take the lead."

"I am."

"How's that working out for you?"

"Not great."

Jade's smile faded. "Who knows about your…" Her face scrunched up. "Son? Daughter? Oh man, I have a niece or nephew."

I have a daughter.

"Her name is Summer. You need to keep this close to the vest."

"I won't say a word, but Dal, this has to be a shock."

"This isn't about me," he said roughly.

"But it is. It's about both of you. You have a right to feel things."

He didn't reply because he couldn't. All of a sudden, he felt as if he were standing on the edge of a cliff, and if he fell over it, he didn't know if he'd make it back up.

"I love you, Dallas. We all do. You'll be okay, you know that, right?"

He nodded and murmured. "As long as Vivian is good, I'm good."

"So, what are you going to do?"

He held his cell loosely in his hand, staring off into the distance before he glanced down at his sister, who watched him closely.

"I'm going to make sure she knows that this time, I'm getting it right. If she wants space, I'll give it to her. I'll wait in the wings for as long as it takes."

"What if it takes longer than you can give?" Jade frowned.

"It won't."

His sister sighed and played with the ends of her hair. "How do you know?"

"Because I'm all in," he said simply. "Because that unicorn means something."

"Unicorn?" He saw Jade's confusion but didn't elaborate. He ended the call with his sister and sat outside until the quiet became too heavy. Then he headed up to his room, which was opposite Vivian's. He almost paused at her door, but knew he needed to honor her request for space. Instead, he lay down on the bed, fully dressed, and stared up at the ceiling.

Was she asleep? Or was she wrangling demons?

He closed his eyes and thought of his daughter. He'd barely been able to string his sentences together, and he hoped like hell she didn't take him for some redneck with no brains. Throat tight, full of emotion, he tried to clear his mind, and eventually, he drifted off to sleep, his last thought of a tangle of dark hair, big blue eyes that shone with love, and a future just outside his grasp.