Chapter Eight

Austin

Austin took Rupert for his check-up two days later during his lunch hour. His dog was making great progress, still wanted his walks, and was reluctant to tone down the boisterous play.

Austin had spent the time reliving those two nights in Lynton's bed and aching for more. He had tried not to focus on Lynton's apology, tried to push it from his brain and concentrate on his X-rated memories, but it wasn't so easy. His mind wanted more. It wanted softness and tenderness and that passion he had felt when entwined with Lynton. It focused on how Lynton held him after sex, how he'd slept in his arms in that big, comfy bed and felt, for the first time in years, like someone was on his side. Like maybe he didn't have to shoulder the burden of life alone.

If only, oh God, if only…

He waited patiently in the consultation room with Rupert's head in his lap, his dog staring up at him with those beautifully expressive brown eyes. "I love you, pal," he said just as the door opened.

It was a different vet. An older guy with silver hair, glasses, and a calm, reassuring presence. "Hey there," he said, consulting his chart, "you must be Mr. Bale and Rupert."

Austin smiled as best he could as his heart sank in disappointment. "That's right."

"Okay then. Let's take a look at this guy."

Austin approached the front desk with trepidation. The vet, Dr. Fitzgerald, hadn't said anything to him about the check-up being free, but then perhaps it wasn't his business to know. The front desk would be the ones who knew about it. Lynton would have told them, right?

He held Rupert's leash tightly while he tried to go off sniffing at a handsome Siamese cat, and smiled at the lady behind the desk, waiting for her to say the visit was free.

"Would you like to book the next check-up in three days' time?"

"Yes, please. The same time if you can."

"All right, that's all done." The lady passed a sheet of paper across the desk. "That's eighty-three dollars and seventy-four cents."

Austin blinked. "I thought…."

The lady lifted one eyebrow, waiting patiently.

Austin began to blush. "I thought the check-ups were in with the…"

The receptionist looked confused. "Had you arranged that?"

"I—" Austin stopped. No. He would get Lynton in trouble here, that much was obvious. He didn't run the show, he had bosses to answer to, and giving away free treatment could surely lead to his dismissal. Misery consumed him. "No." He pulled his wallet from his back pocket and looked inside. He knew what was there. Ninety dollars for the outstanding electric bill, already late. Somehow he doubted a contribution of six dollars and a few cents would cut the mustard.

He took the money out and pushed it across the counter with a painful smile on his face. It didn't matter. He'd been in this position before. Hell, he was in this position every month before payday. He only had five days to go.

Taking his change and receipt, he led Rupert away. All the way to the car, Rupert was looking up at him with a concerned expression on his face. "Hey, it's okay, boy." Austin opened the back door. "Don't worry." Rupert jumped in. He gave a little bark and licked Austin's chin.

Austin gave him a wan smile and kissed him on the nose. "What would I do without you, huh?"

The electricity went off at seven that evening, but luckily Austin had already taken a shower and used the microwave to heat soup. Philosophically, he dug some candles out from under the kitchen sink and placed them in holders on the coffee table. Now TV was out of the question, Austin settled down with a book, Rupert's head on his knee.

The quiet was strange, but soothing. Austin tried his hardest to concentrate but soon his head fell back against the couch and he let the book drop. He closed his eyes, taking some deep breaths. It was okay. Now was not the time to feel sorry for himself. He had faced bigger obstacles than this. What did it matter if he had to sit in the dark for a few nights?

Nonetheless, his eyes stung and his throat closed up. He willed the sorrow away. Damn it, it was okay. He had Rupert and Rupert's leg would be good as new. Nothing else mattered. His thoughts strayed back two nights—to warmth, to skin on his, to not being alone for just a short while. To feeling wanted.

His ears pricked suddenly at footsteps on the stairs outside his apartment. The lock on the outside entrance door had been broken for a long time. Anyone could get into the apartment block and walk to whichever door they wanted to. His bell rang, startling him.

He glanced at his watch, squinting in the dim light. Who could it be at this hour? He lifted Rupert's head gently and his dog's gaze followed him from the room, alert and watchful. Austin knew one sound from him would have Rupert running to the door and his defense, teeth bared, broken leg or not.

He put the safety chain on because he didn't have a peephole and pulled the door open. Outside, his hair and coat damp with rain, stood Lynton.

Austin gaped. "What are you…"

Lynton sighed. "I'm sorry. I got your address from your records. I was in surgery when you came today. It's my fault you had to pay, I completely forgot. I brought you the money." He held out a hundred-dollar bill.

Tears welled up surprisingly fast in Austin's eyes. He shook his head. "It's okay, I…"

"Come on." Lynton's tone was gentle. "I said you wouldn't be charged for your aftercare."

In the silence, Austin stood with his head bowed. He hated that he wanted to take Lynton's money. Needed to take it. Had he no pride left? Lynton was paying him like Austin was his whore. But Austin had made it that way. He had made himself Lynton's whore.

"Can I come in?"

"I'm not…the place isn't…"

"I don't care how you live, Austin. Let me come in, please."

Austin closed the door. His fingers fumbled at the chain before he got it free and swung the door open. He walked down the hall, letting Lynton follow, letting him see the bare floor and damp patch on the wall and witness Austin's poverty etched into every grain of the place.

Lynton arrived in the living room and glanced at the flickering candles and the sinister shadows climbing high across the walls.

"Hey, Rupert." He petted Austin's dog and Rupert nuzzled him enthusiastically.

"Have a seat," Austin said. "Would you like a drink?"

"Have you got any coffee?"

"Sure. Sugar? Milk?"

"No, thanks."

That was good, because Austin didn't have any. "Be right back."

He put a pan of water on the stove to boil, scraped the dregs of coffee from a jar of instant and threw it away. Just enough for one cup. Another thing Austin needed to buy when he got paid. He stood there waiting for what seemed like an eternity until the water bubbled and he made the coffee, ran himself a glass of water, and went back into the living room.

Rupert had his head on Lynton's lap, the vet petting him.

"Judas," Austin told his dog and put the drinks down, noticing that the hundred-dollar bill lay on the table. He took the threadbare chair opposite.

Lynton smiled. "I think he remembers me. Although seeing as I was the one who stuck needles in him, drilled into his bones, then made him wear the cone of shame, I'm surprised he hasn't bit me." He leaned forward for his cup and took a tentative sip of the coffee. If he found it awful, he didn't let it show on his face.

Austin smiled. "He knows you saved him, that's why he has his head on your lap." Their gazes held as he looked at the heartening picture of Rupert and Lynton together. He wished he could lay his head on Lynton's lap and be petted with those calm, comforting, healing hands.

Lynton kept his violet gaze on his. "Are you okay?"

"Sure."

"You don't seem okay."

Austin's jaw trembled without warning. Christ, no, he couldn't lose it now, not in front of Lynton.

Lynton lifted Rupert's head gently from his lap. He stood, moved around the coffee table and knelt at Austin's feet. He squeezed his knee. "It's all right," he said softly.

Austin turned his face away, swallowing, shaking his head. "No, it's not."

Lynton was silent, perhaps waiting for Austin to spill his guts.

Austin clenched his teeth, his eyes brimming. "I've never been…farther down than I am now. I don't know…which way to go." He had never been so honest with anyone in his life. He had never revealed to anyone that day to day, he was barely hanging on.

Lynton got to his feet. He squashed himself into the big chair with Austin, then brought Austin's head to his shoulder, stroking his hair. "It's okay," he said again. "I promise."

Austin clutched at him. A great wave of emotion built to a crescendo in his chest before the dam smashed open and finally, Austin broke.

He held Lynton like a drowning man as he wept brokenly, great wrenching sobs that tore through his chest and wracked his entire body.

Lynton held him closer, tighter, arms wrapped around him, lips against his temple. "I'm here," he said. "I won't leave you."

Austin didn't dare believe him. Nobody had been there for him in such a long time. Why should Lynton be interested in sharing his miserable existence?

He buried his wet face in Lynton's solid shoulder and prayed to God for something more than this.

Sometime later, Austin sat exhausted, slumped against the vet's chest, holding Lynton's damp, crumpled handkerchief. Lynton had such a calm, soothing air about him. He'd taken the tears in his stride, stalwart and comforting, making no move to leave.

Austin would have expected any other man to run a mile. But he was discovering new things about the man who had taken Austin's sexual favors and turned them into something explosive.

Lynton's fingers dug into his hair, stroking his scalp. "Tell me a bit about yourself."

Austin's voice was cracked and raw when he spoke. He cleared his throat. "I work in a warehouse."

"How long have you done that?"

"Fifteen years, since I left high school. I didn't get my diploma. I dicked around too much, hung out with the wrong crowd. I didn't know what to do when I left. Now I think of all the subjects I would have loved to study at college."

"It doesn't pay well?"

Austin shook his head. "By the end of the month I can't afford to feed both me and Rupert. I have to put gas in my car to get to work. That and Rupert are the most important things."

"When did your electric get cut off?"

"Tonight."

"Where are your parents?"

Austin paused. It was a difficult subject, one no one had broached with him in so long. "My dad's dead. My mom's in New Zealand."

"Do you hear from her?"

"Not much."

"Why didn't you go with her?"

Austin swallowed. The probing of his wounds hurt. "My mom remarried. I didn't like him."

"Do you have anybody else?"

Austin closed his eyes. He nuzzled the soft, damp fabric of Lynton's sweater. "I have Rupert."

Lynton sighed. "You have me now, too."

Austin lifted his head, staring. Lynton traced his cheek with light fingertips. He leaned forward to kiss him.

Austin closed his eyes. He let Lynton's soft lips caress him and take away the weight on his chest, the crushing despair of his life.

The kiss started off gentle and slowly turned needy and passionate. Lynton maneuvered himself out of the chair, bent, and lifted Austin into his arms. Shocked, Austin hung onto him as the vet carried him to the bedroom.

Austin's room was the only one in the apartment he'd spent money on. He had a decent double bed and carved wooden nightstands with delicate glass lamps. He even had a carpet and thick, luxurious curtains. He spent more time here than in any other room and it was the only one he didn't feel shame letting Lynton see.

Lynton laid him down on the bed. He reached to the switch to click on the lamp nearest to them. A peach glow illuminated the darkness and Austin watched as he stripped. Lynton's body was so exciting. Lean and ridged with muscle, his biceps well developed, his abs hard. Lynton pushed his underwear down and his cock sprang up to his belly. Austin was lucky. He knew how lucky he was. If Lynton hadn't been gay, if he hadn't found Austin attractive, Austin's offer would have been in vain. They'd wouldn't be here now and Rupert would be gone, euthanized because Austin couldn't afford the bill. Instead, one night had turned into three with no signs of slowing down. Austin reminded himself that he had offered Lynton indefinite use of his body. Lynton could keep cashing his chips in until the day he died. And the way Austin was feeling at the moment, that would be fine by him. The vet wanted him and that feeling was reciprocated. He remembered those words he had gasped out last time Lynton fucked him. Nobody ever fucked me like you. How embarrassing, but true nonetheless.

Lynton crawled onto the bed. He helped Austin shed his T-shirt, then he pulled down Austin's sweatpants and underwear, sliding his socks off at the same time. Crouched over him, he perused Austin's body in silence.

"What?" Austin longed to pull covers over himself. He knew he was too thin—the consequences of too many skipped meals while trying to make ends meet.

Lynton smiled. "Just admiring you."

Austin bit his lip. He couldn't understand the heat in Lynton's eyes or that the vet wanted to come back for more after he'd had Austin once.

Lynton stroked his cheek. "I think you need me to tell you you're beautiful, don't you?"

Austin said nothing, breath caught in his chest.

Lynton shook his head. "Man, when you made me that offer." He smiled bashfully. "Well, I jerked off that night. How could I not?"

Austin squirmed, thinking of doing the same thing outside the animal hospital.

Lynton's expression sobered. "And I felt bad for doing it. You only offered yourself to me because you were desperate. And I took you up on your offer, knowing how low it would bring you."

Austin's throat felt as though it was blocked by a rock. He licked his lips, tried to speak, and couldn't.

"I'm sorry," Lynton said.

Austin cleared his throat. "You said sorry last time. You don't need to keep on saying it. I know. And there's nothing to be sorry for. We're both grown-ups and we both got something out of it."

Lynton regarded him for the longest time. "I can't help feeling I got more out of it than you."

Austin stroked a hand from Lynton's shoulder, down the length of his arm. "I got my dog's life and…" he hesitated, "I haven't faked anything with you. I got plenty out of it, I promise you that." He smiled.

Lynton leaned closer, his lips an inch from Austin's. "God, when I'm inside you…" he shuddered. "You really enjoyed it?"

"The begging you to fuck me didn't give it away?"

Lynton laughed softly. "Maybe you said what you thought I wanted to hear."

Austin touched his face. "Do you really believe that?"

Lynton brushed his lips over his. "I don't know."

"You should," Austin said. "I meant what I said about fucking me for as long as you need. Whatever you want."

Lynton's eyes darkened. In a low voice, he said, "I do want to carry on fucking you. I want it very much. But only if you want it too. Not because you feel obliged, but because you want to fuck me too."

Austin drew in a shaky breath. "I do. I really do." If only Lynton knew how much Austin wanted him, and needed him.

"But it's not just that," Lynton said. "I want to help you. I want to be there for you. I meant what I said. You get that, right?"

"Why would you—" Austin's voice broke. He pulled Lynton down into a desperate kiss and Lynton returned it, catching his breath, holding Austin by the back of the head, his grip both tender and possessive. Their tongues tangled and Lynton reached down between their bodies to grasp their cocks, jerking them, spreading their pre-cum down both their shafts.

Austin panted for breath. No one had ever been able to bring him so close to the edge so quickly before. Lynton's kiss scorched his lips, the weight of his body set him on fire and that jerking hand threatened to make him blow his load in record time. He threw his head back, gasping. "Lynton, I'm going to…"

"Me too," Lynton said on a breathless laugh. "Come on. Let me see you come." He dropped his gaze, watching their dicks, groaning.

Austin cried out as he hit the peak. He clung onto Lynton's shoulders, bucking his hips, squeezing his eyes shut as he spurted, his cock jerking.

"Fuck," Lynton groaned out, spreading Austin's cum all over both their cocks. Austin felt him climax too, then they were both wet and sticky, flooded with semen, and it was the hottest thing ever. Austin wasn't sure he'd ever come with another man like this.

He lay there gasping, trying to get his breath back, flinching with aftershocks as Lynton smoothed his thumb over his slit. Lynton gave a little laugh. He brought his hand to his mouth and licked his fingers. "Mmm." Austin's dick twitched to see that and he felt the arousal still simmering low in his belly. He suspected he would be ready to go again quite soon if Lynton kept this up.

Lynton rolled onto his back. "You taste good. I want you to come in my mouth next time."

Yeah, Austin's dick was definitely getting interested again. "How do you know you're not tasting yourself?"

"Well, we both taste good then." They both laughed at that.

Lynton turned his head and smiled. "That's better. I want to see more happiness on your face."

That lump was back in Austin's throat. He slid down and buried his face against Lynton's chest. Lynton held him close, kissing his hair.

Austin felt himself drifting to sleep, his worries dissolving into the ether. At that moment, nothing else mattered.