Chapter 13

13

‘What?'

Turning around, Megan saw Jay standing outside the reception area to Wagging Tails, Flora and Percy with him.

‘I saw you… and him.' Lyle pointed his finger in Jay's direction again.

Megan could feel her cheeks reddening. He'd seen her and Jay. He must have seen them kissing. How though? She hadn't noticed his car here at the gate before Flora pointed it out. Had she just been completely oblivious?

‘You've been spying on me.'

‘Not spying, no. I came here to give you a second chance at coming home with me or, if not, then to give you the signed copy of the divorce paper and I happened to see you two together. I don't spy.'

Ha. He doesn't spy, instead lies, threatens and intimidates. Right. At least he'd signed the papers.

She held out her hand. ‘Thank you for signing them.'

‘Oh, I think you've misunderstood.' Looking down at the envelope, he slowly and methodically tore it into four pieces before letting it fall from his fingers.

She looked down at the pieces of paper on the dried dirt. ‘What do you mean?'

‘I'd been going to give you the choice: come home with me and I'll forgive you for foiling my plans to build over this place…' he signalled to Wagging Tails, his lips curling down in disgust ‘…or to take the divorce papers, the house and a fair percentage of the business profits. That's until I realised the only reason you want to divorce me is because of him.'

Again, he pointed towards Jay.

‘He is not the reason I want a divorce. I want a divorce because I don't feel as though I know you any more.' She bit down on her bottom lip, forcing herself not to utter what she really wanted to, swallowing back the words telling him she didn't love him any more. That would only rile him further. She knew that.

‘More like you want to get to know him better.' Lyle flared his nostrils.

‘No, that's not the reason and you know it. We broke up months ago.'

‘And I bet that was so you could come running down here and into his arms. How long has it been going on, Megan? Is he the real reason you didn't want me digging up this sorry place?'

‘What? No. I've only just met him. He's only just started volunteering here. This has nothing to do with him. You know that.'

‘Umm.' Lyle leaned forward, resting his elbows on the gate between them, and lowered his voice. ‘Or do I? Or more to the point, does my solicitor?'

Megan opened and closed her mouth. So this was what all of this was about, then? He was planning to make it look as though she'd ended their marriage because she was having an affair. Would she be entitled to less financial gains if she had been an adulterer? She wasn't sure, but she bet Lyle was hoping so. ‘You know I haven't been. You know that.'

Lyle smiled slowly, a small, calculated movement, and turned around.

‘You can't do this.'

Opening his car door, Lyle paused and looked back at her. ‘Oh, but I can.'

‘You've still not told me how you knew where to find me…'

It was too late, the car door was shut now, the engine rumbling to life.

Standing there, she watched him drive away, taking the corner at the end of the lane too sharply, the red brake lights pumping before he disappeared around the bend.

Great. So now he was going to make her life difficult. Now he'd make certain the divorce was long and drawn out, knowing that she wouldn't have the money to contest his arguments. She sighed. Who was she kidding? He would have done so anyway. He wouldn't have just handed over the divorce papers, come to a mutual agreement over their finances and gone their separate ways peacefully. No, this was just another of his games, another chance for him to get one over on her, to feel as though he'd won.

Megan walked towards the gate, then, bending down and slipping her arm through the metal bars, picked up the pieces of the torn envelope. It probably wasn't even the divorce papers. She separated the brown envelope from the paper and looked. Huh, it was. Had he really been going to give them to her? Signed?

She turned as she felt a hand on her shoulder.

‘Are you okay, lovely?' Flora's voice was kind, worried.

Megan nodded and held up the scraps of the envelope. ‘He was going to give me the divorce papers.'

‘Oh, why did he rip them up then?' Flora frowned.

Megan looked from Flora to Jay, who was still standing in front of the reception area with Percy, and shook her head. She couldn't tell Flora why. She couldn't tell anyone. It was just one of Lyle's mind games. He would have found another reason besides Jay to have torn the envelope up. She was surprised the reason hadn't simply been because she was here, helping at Wagging Tails.

‘I don't know.'

‘Well, let's get you inside and get you a nice strong coffee, shall we?'

Megan nodded as Flora slipped her arm around her shoulder and began walking back across the courtyard. As they neared Percy and Jay, she noticed Jay say something to Percy before walking away.

Why had he just left instead of seeing if she was okay? Why hadn't he waited another two minutes until she'd reached him?

She turned back to Flora. ‘A coffee sounds good, thanks.'

‘All right, love?' Percy held the door open, letting the two of them through. ‘Looks as though you sent him on his way. Good for you.'

She hadn't. He'd left on his own accord.

Megan glanced behind her back out into the courtyard. ‘Where did Jay go?'

‘Oh, he said he had to go and finish off levelling the ground for Susan.' Percy shrugged and shut the door. ‘He could have waited a few minutes, if you ask me.'

‘Right.' Sitting down at the kitchen table, Megan set the pieces of envelope and divorce papers in front of her.

‘Here you go. Get that down you.' Flora placed a mug of steaming coffee in front of her. ‘I'll just take this out to Jay and be right back.'

‘I'll take it, love.' Percy took the mug from her.

Megan stood up and held her hand out. ‘I'll take it. I could do with a bit of fresh air.'

Nodding, Percy passed her the mug.

She walked quickly through the kitchen and into the reception area, before stepping outside, the heat a barrier of warmth as it hit her. She needed to speak to Jay. She needed to know why he'd just walked away without even checking how she was.

As she walked across the courtyard towards him, she glanced back towards the gate and the lane beyond, half expecting to see Lyle still standing watching her.

Of course, he wasn't. But now he knew she was volunteering here nothing would stop him turning up as and when he wished. He didn't know where she was staying though. Did he? She took a deep, shuddering breath – this would be it now, she'd always be looking out for him, looking over her shoulder, searching the streets. West Par was no longer her safe haven, her new start.

Stopping a few feet away from Jay, she watched as he plunged his shovel into the ground, the dirt in front of him darker than the rest, the hose lying by his feet.

‘Jay?'

He glanced at her before pulling the shovel back and throwing the loose mud to the side.

‘Flora made you a coffee.'

‘Thanks, just pop it down there, please?' He indicated to the slabs behind her.

After placing it down, she began to walk away before pausing and turning back. She couldn't work out if he just wanted to get the ground levelled or if he was being off with her. It certainly felt as though he was dismissing her. But why? Was it because of the kiss? Had it been a mistake? But he'd made the first move. He'd been the one to instigate it. No, it couldn't be the kiss. So was it Lyle?

‘Jay?'

‘Yes?' He turned and looked at her, his forehead creased, his eyes hooded.

‘Why…? Have I done something wrong?'

After laying the shovel against the wheelbarrow to his right, he plunged his hand into his pocket. ‘Percy told me that Lyle is your ex.'

‘That's right.'

‘The man who tried to demolish Wagging Tails in order to build a housing development.'

‘Yes, he is. Percy is right.'

That's what it was. He thought she'd been involved.

She took a step towards him, flinching as he inched backwards. ‘I didn't have anything to do with it, though. I didn't even know his plans, not at first, and when I realised what he was up to, what he'd done, I worked with Sally's partner, Andy, to stop him.'

He nodded.

‘You've got to believe me. I'd never try to shut down a dogs' home, let alone threaten anyone. You must know that.'

She searched his face. He couldn't really think she was capable of something like that? Could he? Over the past week or so, they'd gotten to know each other. He knew her better than that.

‘I believe you. I know you wouldn't do anything of the sort, and Percy told me your role in saving Wagging Tails.'

‘Good.'

Great, that was great.

Jay turned back and picked up the shovel again.

‘Jay…'

Looking back at her, he paused, shovel in hand. ‘Yes?'

‘Are we okay?' She gestured between them.

Sinking the shovel back into the soil, Jay shrugged. ‘Why didn't you tell me who you were?'

‘Who I am?' She frowned. Why did she have to be judged for the person she'd been, was, married to? She was an individual in her own right. She'd never hid the person she was from him. Yes, she hadn't told him Lyle was her ex, but that had been because she didn't want this. She hadn't wanted him to judge her against the man she'd spent her life with. Her marriage didn't define her.

‘That Lyle is your ex.' Jay spoke quietly, his eyes fixed on hers.

‘Because that's not who I am. Lyle is my ex, but I shouldn't be judged on that. I didn't know what he was up to like I said.'

‘I'm not judging you on Lyle's actions. I'm judging you on your own. You should have told me.'

She bit down on her bottom lip. ‘Why? What difference would it have made?'

She shook her head. That was it, wasn't it? He'd have never taken her for dinner, never kissed her if he'd known it had been Lyle who she'd recently split from. But that wasn't fair.

‘It wouldn't have made any difference to how I felt about you.'

‘Then what's the problem?' She didn't understand.

Her heart sank, he'd said ‘felt'.

‘You were there when I spoke about Lyle and his development in the kitchen. Do you remember?'

‘Yes.' She nodded.

‘And you didn't say anything. You didn't mention that he was your ex, you didn't even mention that you knew of him.'

‘No, I didn't.'

‘You hid that from me.' He pinched the bridge of his nose. ‘You kept it from me and after Leanne hiding her affair and all the lies and secrets, I just can't do it. Not again.'

Megan's stomach lurched. ‘I… I just didn't know what to say. I didn't want to be judged on his actions.'

Leaving the shovel stuck standing in the soil, Jay walked across to her and took her hands in his. ‘I really thought we had a connection, but I can't walk into a relationship knowing that the person isn't being honest with me. I can't put myself through that. Not again. I'm sorry.'

Megan swallowed.

‘If I'm going to open myself up to a relationship again,' Jay continued, ‘I need it to be based on honesty.'

‘I just didn't know how to tell you.'

She could feel the callouses on his skin caused by shovelling the dirt, could see the hurt in his eyes. She should have told him. She should have been honest instead of keeping it a secret. She hadn't meant to hurt him, but she understood. She understood he needed honesty after how Leanne treated him.

Jay closed his eyes for a moment before looking at her again. ‘I'm sorry, I know it sounds over the top and I understand why you felt you couldn't tell me. I do. In a way anyway, but that's what I mean, we need to be able to trust each other.'

‘I agree. Trust is everything, and the lack of trust ruined my marriage with Lyle. But you can trust me. I just…' She pulled her hands away. Maybe it wasn't the fact that she hadn't told him, maybe he was doing just what he said he wasn't. Maybe this lack of trust talk was to cover up the fact that he simply didn't want anything to do with her now that he knew she was Lyle's ex. ‘I need to go.'

‘Megan, wait. Please, let's talk.'

She turned around. He hadn't wanted to talk. He hadn't even cared enough to see how she was after speaking to her ex. He'd made his position clear; he didn't trust her. And that was fine. She shouldn't be getting into a relationship so soon after splitting with Lyle, anyway. She needed to give herself space. The few days when she and Jay had had a connection together had been lovely. It had shown her what was possible, what she might have in the future, but not now.

‘Megan?'

Ignoring his voice, she hurried across the courtyard and back into the reception area, grateful that Percy had left to continue going about his day and Flora was on the phone behind the counter.

In the kitchen, sinking into a chair, she pulled Flora's laptop and the stack of paperwork towards her before leaning her elbows on the table and covering her eyes with her hands. She deserved this. She deserved all of it. She should have told Jay about Lyle when he first brought up the subject of him. And she shouldn't have spent time with Jay, gotten close to him, kissed him, not so soon after she and Lyle had broken up. She'd brought all this upon herself.

She shouldn't have even thought for a second that Jay would want her, not after he'd found out who she was, who her ex was. There must be a small part of everyone here who wondered if she'd had anything to do with his behaviour. A small part that must think she'd at least realised what Lyle had been up to. But she hadn't. She hadn't known he'd been capable of what he'd done. She hadn't even seen that he'd changed. Not that much.

As the laptop whirred into action, she let her thoughts drift back to when she and Lyle had married. He'd been so sweet, so kind with his time and money, always there to help others. What had happened to him? And when? Why had he turned into the man he was today? And now to refuse to sign the divorce papers, to threaten to lie about why their marriage had broken down… She shook her head. He was going to throw everything at this divorce, wasn't he? She wouldn't stand a chance.

She clicked the folder on the screen, opening the spreadsheet. She'd have to book another appointment with her solicitor, make sure she was prepared for whatever he threw at her. Now, though, she needed to focus, needed to think about something else.