Chapter 18 Sydney

Chapter 18 Sydney

 

 

“How are you feeling after the little tiff at your apartment?”

I put my mug of hot chocolate down to gape at Damian. “Little tiff? Seriously?”

He shrugged.

I scoffed. “It was a massacre. There was blood everywhere.”

He nodded. “I was a part of the cleanup crew. I was a little surprised because Cole usually kills with less pomp and circumstance, but I suspect he lost his temper, which is understandable.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah. Hunters came after his mate. That messes with a wolf’s head, makes them go a little crazy.”

“I’m not his mate,” I said.

He lifted on eyebrows. “Uh huh. Plus, hunters killed his parents. The way he tore those guys apart in your living room screamed vengeance. He still hasn’t found the hunter responsible, though. I guess he takes pleasure in taking out any hunter.”

Shaking my head, I studied Damian. He casually talked about the blood and gore as if we were discussing the weather. He had his feet up on the center table in Cole’s living room while he scrolled through his cell phone.

“You’re all crazy,” I muttered.

“Welcome to the shifter world. Speaking of crazy.” He looked up. “I heard you ran back into the battle to save the Alpha with a lamp.” His lips twitched, and he lost the fight to hold back his amusement. He snickered and then burst into laughter.

Stunned, I watched the man who had struck a little fear in my heart with his lethal stare laugh. Admittedly, the whole scenario was comical. I grinned. “Yeah, bringing a lamp to a werewolf fight was insane.”

He laughed harder. “You’re brave, Sydney. I’ll give you that.” When he sobered, he said, “I knew there was a reason I liked you.”

“You do?”

He shrugged. “You earned my respect with your courage the first time we met.” His eyes narrowed to slits. “A word of advice, little half-breed, that kind of bravado will get you killed.”

I snorted. “Gee, thanks.” Picking up my mug, I took a few more sips of my warm beverage. I was curled up on the sofa across from Damian, who hadn’t let me out of his sight for three days. Cole had him, Alex and Dominic rotating on babysitting duty since he had to go to his office plus the pack’s compound, every day. I felt bad adding to his list of responsibilities, but I felt much more secure in his posh top-floor apartment than in mine.

“If you like me, why have you treated me so horribly?” I asked.

Putting his phone down, he pinned me with that lethal stare I knew well. “Because even though I liked your spirit, it didn’t mean I wouldn’t end you if you turned out to be a threat to my family.”

My eyes widened.

“But, since you’re not, we’re all good.” He smiled. “Right, Syd?”

I eyed him cautiously. Damian was so mercurial. However, getting to see another side of him the last few days, he was alright. His loyalty to Cole and the pack was incredible. “Right.”

Just then, the door opened, and Cole stepped in. His gaze immediately zeroed in on me. My relaxed state went right out the window. I just wasn’t sure how to behave around him. He rejected me, broke my heart, and now I was pretty much living in his personal space. Sometimes, I wondered if he hated having me here, considering that he didn’t like my half-breed status. However, he was a decent man, as I’d learned, and he wouldn’t leave me to fend for myself after learning that I wasn’t his enemy. We were in an uncomfortable situation.

“Looks like I’m off babysitting duty for the rest of the night,” Damian said, getting up.

Rolling my eyes, I told him, “Thanks.”

He smirked and sauntered to the door. “See you, Cole.”

“Sure.”

With the two of us left alone, that wretched, awkward energy crept in. I hated it.

“Damian likes you,” he stated. “That doesn’t happen with just anyone.”

I shrugged. “He’s been stuck with me for hours at a time for days. I had to grow on him at some point.”

His lips lifted into a tight smile, and he shrugged out of his jacket.

So far, I’d accomplished getting into the good graces of a few members of the Moon Guardians pack. Violet, Damian, and Alex seemed to like me. Even Dominic had mellowed out a bit around me. The Alpha, however, was a hard sell. He hadn’t shown me any sign that helikedme.

“How are you?” he asked.

“Okay. What about you? Busy day?”

“I’m fine, and yes, as always. Running a pack while keeping up a legit business can get hectic.”

He’d shared that it was his father’s idea to start Moon Guardians Private Security as a way to keep up a legitimate human front. The company had barely gotten off the ground when his father was killed. Cole had stepped into the roles of Alpha and CEO and had managed to direct the company toward incredible success.

His drive was inspiring, and I got a better understanding of why he was always so stern, and stoic. He had a lot of responsibility. He took care of everyone. But who took care of the Alpha?

He caught me studying him and asked, “What?”

“Nothing. I, um…made you dinner if you’re interested. It’s the least I can do for your generosity.” Maybe I could take care of him to an extent while I was living in his space.

Cole didn’t respond immediately. He just gazed at me with an unreadable expression. I thought he’d turn down my offer, and I braced myself for the humiliation, but he nodded and said, “I’m interested, but only if you’ll join me.”

“Of course.”

Fifteen minutes later, we sat side by side at the island, enjoying Spaghetti Bolognese. “This is good,” Cole said. It was the only thing he’d said after about ten minutes. He wasn’t very chatty.

“Thanks. It’s one of the few dishes that my aunt taught me. I’m not the greatest cook, but I excel at making coffee.”

Cole smiled a real one that reached his eyes. It was an incredible sight, considering he didn’t do it much. His features relaxed, and he looked younger, carefree even.

“Really? I’ll have to put your skills to the test,” he said. “Coffee machine is there whenever you’re ready.” He pointed to the deluxe espresso machine.

My smile nearly split my face in two because we were chatting, and it wasn’t awkward. Even if he never claimed me as his mate, maybe there was hope that we could be friends. Although, being friend-zoned by my fated mate sounded like a lot of emotional suffering.

Pushing the negative thoughts aside, I shared, “I worked at a café in Nebraska part-time to help pay my tuition. Hopefully, I’ll be able to go back to school eventually. Of course, I’ll have to put in some overtime at Dupart’s Diner to save up enough money.”

“You can go back to school whenever you like,” he said. “Don’t worry about tuition.”

“I couldn’t accept that much money from you.”

He glanced at me. “Why not? I’ve funded plenty of pack members’ education.”

“It wouldn’t be appropriate. “We’re not…”Together. “I’m not a member of your pack.”

He must have heard the dejection I tried to hide in my voice because he sighed heavily. Putting his fork down, he turned to me. “We haven’t really talked since you’ve been here.”

“You’re busy, and I get it.”

“Look, Sydney, as much as I now know that you’re innocent, it won’t—”

“The pack still won’t accept me. I get that too.” My appetite was fleeing, and I pushed food around on my plate. “Despite you not hating me anymore—at least I hope you don’t—you can’t force the others to accept me.”

“I never hated you. I rejected you because I really thought you were a threat to my people and me. I shouldn’t have assumed you were guilty by association. You have nothing to do with what your parents did. For that, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

He frowned. “I still can’t openly claim you. Not only are you half werewolf, but the reputation of your parents has stacked the cards against you. None of the pack members will accept you as their Luna.”

Nothing he told me was new information, but it still hurt. I yearned to be accepted, to have a family. I wanted to be let into the fold of the Moon Guardians Pack.

“I know that,” I whispered. Gazing at him, I asked, “Are you implying you want to claim me?”

Our eyes locked, and I waited for his response with bated breath. If he said yes, that would provide a salve for the open, bleeding wound of rejection I had in my heart.

“I…Sydney…” He scrubbed a hand over his face. “It doesn’t matter what I want.”

I exhaled, embracing the bite of my disappointment.

***

That night, I sat in my room—a guest bedroom at Cole’s place—and stared out the window. The picturesque view of the city from this high up was comforting. I got so lost in how pretty the stars looked against the backdrop of the dark sky that I jumped when a knock sounded.

I shuffled off the bed and hurried to the door. Cole stood on the other side, holding my backpack.

“Hey,” he greeted.

“Hey.”

“I forgot this in my car. I stopped by your apartment to grab it.” He held up the bag in offering.

Taking it, I breathed a sigh of relief and clutched it to my chest. “How did you even know I needed it?”

“It’s practically been glued to your person since I met you.”

I laugh at that. “True.”

“Since I forbade you from going back to your apartment, I figured I’d get it for you. It seemed important.”

“It is.” Inside was the little box with the mementos that reminded me of my mother and Aunt Lydia. “Thank you, it was sweet of you.”

He nodded and glanced into the room. “Is the room alright? If you need something—”

“Everything is fine,” I replied a little too abruptly. It wasn’t that I was ungrateful or that I didn’t want to see him. His proximity kept reminding me that he’d never see me as anything more than someone he felt obligated to help.

He shoved his hands into his pockets and rocked back on his heels. It wasn’t often I saw Cole uncertain about anything.

To quell the uneasy silence, I asked. “How are your injuries?”

“I’m almost completely healed.”

He’d said the weapons the hunter used were made of a special kind of silver that could mortally wound most shifters. If they hit vital organs, that shifter might be a goner. Cole said his healing process took longer than was typical because of the silver.

“That’s good.”

“Good thing that hunter had poor aim, huh?” His eyes twinkled with humor.

I gasped. “Oh my god, don’t even joke about that.” Seeing him get stabbed and shot still haunted me.

His soft chuckle sounded foreign coming from him. Soon, his smile turned into a frown. “I should apologize for earlier…”

I sighed. “Please, don’t. You were right. Your pack comes first. You have no loyalty to me, a virtual stranger, and I’m fine with that.” I had to work overtime to keep my expression schooled. “I should get some sleep. See you tomorrow?”

He frowned. “Sure.” With that, he walked away without a goodnight.

Closing the door, I sagged against it and exhaled. Hiding the intense feelings I had for him was no easy task. This whole mate bond thing was becoming a pain in the ass…or the heart.